Title - Anger Revisited
Author - Donna
Email address - donnah@pop.uky.edu
URL - www.geocities.com/Area51/Quadrant/4571/
Rating - 17+
Category - MSR
Spoilers - None
Keywords - Mulder/Other, M/S
Summary - Sequel to Anger
Feedback - Please

Disclaimer - Mulder, Scully, the Lone Gunmen and Skinner all belong to
Chris Carter, 10-13 and Fox.  No infringement intended


Anger Revisited


He kept glancing over at her, and knowing her, she had to be aware of
it.  Okay, get to work, put her out of your mind, and try desperately one
more time to put last night's dreams out of your head.

He turned to the computer, his back to her as she went through the
files.  An uncomfortable silence fell over the office, but he did manage to
wrench his mind back to work.

Some time later something made him look up and he caught her staring at
him.  She blushed immediately at being caught; then to his surprise, she
actually made a noise like a growl, slammed the file drawer shut and headed
out the door.

He was on his feet in an instant and caught her before she could press the
button for the elevator.  He grabbed her arm to turn her towards him, then
remembered the last time he had made such a move.  He released her
instantly and put his hands in the air to signal his surrender.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."  She nearly spat the word at him.

"Oh no you don't.  What did I do?  I don't remember either of us being shot
at this morning and I haven't ditched you in the last twelve hours, so what
is it?"  He wasn't going to let her get away with it this time.

"You've ruined my life."

That statement was met with a stunned silence and he saw the regret for her
rash words cloud her eyes immediately.  Finally he took a step towards her,
"You're just now getting pissed about that?"

The fact that he had made a joke of it seemed to relax her slightly.

"Please come back to the office and talk to me."  He thought she was going
to refuse, but after a long moment she did turn toward his door.

"What did I do?"  He sat on the corner of the desk and watched her.

"You've just made me think about, about things I don't want to think about."

That took him a second, then his face lit up like a Christmas tree.  Her
own eyes narrowed and her eyebrow rose.  He immediately attempted to make
his expression bland, but there was nothing he could do about the twinkle
in his eye.

"Listen, why don't we go to dinner tonight and just talk.  Wait a minute,"
he put up his hand to forestall her automatic protest.  "Not about anything
specific, let's just go and not talk about work or problems or
anything.  We can relax and just visit."

"Visit?"

"Come on, where's your sense of adventure?"

He heard the growl again, but then, "Pizza?"

"No, a real dinner.  I'll pick you up at seven."

"Pick me up?"

"Yes, and I won't make you eat in the car.  How's that?"

"I . . . I, uh, I - "

"I'll take that as a yes.  Now, can I get back to this report?  You know I
like to keep the paperwork up to date."

Her eyes narrowed again and he readied himself to duck in case she threw
the stapler at him, but instead she turned back toward the files and jerked
the drawer she had been using back open.

Rather than ruin everything, he kept his mouth shut and returned to the
computer.  He had to at least make a pretense of work now.  But to know
that she was thinking about the conversation they'd had was . . . stimulating.


When she opened the door she was more than a little surprised to see that
he was wearing a tie.  He had changed out of the suit, but had on a sports
jacket that was cut perfectly for him.  Damn he looked good in clothes, and
he didn't have to watch his weight or anything.  Okay, he ran and swam, but
he seemed to enjoy it, while she had to confine herself to yogurt and
salads to stay in her clothes.

And why the hell was she ogling him anyway.  The man was impossible and
he'd thrown her completely off guard with the talk they'd had at an
abandoned gasoline station of all places.  She felt off balance around him
now and that wasn't good.  One thing she had learned after all these years
with the man was that she had to stay on her toes to keep up with him.

"Scully?  May I come in?"

Shit.  She nodded and stepped back to allow him entry.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine Mulder."

"Good.  You look nice."

She blinked at that.  A compliment?  This was going to be a long
night.  "Uh, thanks."  She had changed as well into a light summer dress,
nothing he had ever seen before.  Now she was glad she'd thought to do it.

He was the one eyeing her now.  A thin little dress like that - who'd have
thought Scully owned something like this.  It was powder blue and
sleeveless, and it flared slightly just above her knees.  This was going to
be a fun evening.

"Ready to go?"

"Uh, sure."  She picked up a small handbag and a wrap.  Mulder put his hand
on her back and escorted her to the car.  Her eyebrow rose when he opened
the door for her but she said nothing.

He got in and pulled out into traffic.  After a couple of minutes, she
looked up from her hands.  "Where are we going?'

"A little place I heard of.  I think you'll like it."  He didn't offer the
name and she didn't want to push.  Besides, she was feeling unaccountably
shy around the man.  They were quiet on the drive, but he didn't
press.  When he pulled up in front of the Hay-Adams she turned to look at him.

"Here?"

"Sure, why not?"

"It's, Mulder, it's expensive."

"So we can't eat here every night.  But tonight, we can.  Come on."  The
valet had come to the car and opened her door.  She glanced over at Mulder
one more time and then allowed the valet to help her from the car.

Mulder's hand was on her back again to walk her inside.  The maitre'd
nodded at them.  "Sir?"

"We have reservations, under Mulder."

The matre'd glanced down at his book.  "Yes sir, Mr. Mulder.  Your table is
ready.  Please follow me."

Mulder glanced over at Scully and winked, then had his hand on her back
again.  Surely he didn't always touch her this much?  Why was she so aware
of it tonight?

He ordered a bottle of wine and she sat watching him.  This was a mistake;
she should have refused his offer of dinner.  She would have, if she'd any
idea he was talking about something like this.

Once the waiter left the table, Mulder looked over at her again.  "You
know, we could have a conversation."

"I guess I'm wondering if I should call you Eddie."

Mulder grinned, "No, it's me - Fox."

She looked down again and he sighed.  Had he made a mistake?  The wine
arrived and when they both had a glass, he ducked down to see her eyes.  "A
toast?"

"What would we toast to?"

"How about partnerships, of all kinds."

Her eyes widened, but when his glass touched hers, she nodded and drank
with him.  She was still too quiet for him.  He needed to get her to loosen
up, so he picked a topic.  "What's your mother up to?  You haven't
mentioned her lately."

"Oh, she's fine.  She's getting ready to go to California to spend some
time with Tara and Matthew."

"Not Bill?"

"He's shipping out, so she's going to keep Tara company."

"They get along really well, don't they?"

"Well, Tara lost her mother when she was young, so she appreciates
Mom.  And they have a lot in common, both navy wives, kids."

"Kids?"

"Uh, yeah.  Tara's pregnant again.  That's another reason for Mom to go out
there."

"Is she having problems?"

"Just morning sickness I think, and having an active little boy."  She
looked down again and he realized what a bad topic he had stumbled
onto.  He managed not to sigh.  The last time Tara had given birth, Scully
had lost her only child.  He glanced over as he heard the music start.

"Hey Scully, may I have this dance?"

She looked up startled.  "What?"

"Dance, you know, move to the music."

"What, what if someone sees us?"

"What if they do?  It's just a dance.  Come on, it's been a long time since
we danced."

She watched him rise and looked at the hand he held out to her.  She saw
her own hand be encompassed as he held her chair.  She let him lead her
onto the dance floor, and take her into his arms.

A long time?  They'd only danced once in all the years they had been
together.  Well, one occasion, more than one dance at that particular time.

She could feel his breath on her ear and it was making her body tense
up.  She nearly jumped when he whispered, "breathe," into her ear.  But she
followed his advice.

He fully appreciated the deep breath she took in his arms and felt her
relax.  The dancing immediately became smoother, easier and he pulled her
slightly closer.  They danced through a second number before returning to
their seats for their appetizer.

He held her chair again, and when he seated himself looked into her
eyes.  "Thank you."

She smiled back at him and decided it was her turn, "Where did you learn to
dance, Mulder?"

He rolled his eyes and said, "It's a boring story."

Her eyebrow rose, "What was her name?"

"Who said there was a her?"  He countered.

"So you learned to dance with another man?  I'm surprised you didn't let me
lead part of the time."

He grinned then, caught.  "Phoebe."

"Ah, the fabulous Ms. Green.  Was she a good dancer?"

"Phoebe liked to party.  Dancing was part of that and I had to keep up or .
. . "

"Maybe I should drop her a note of thanks."

"That's okay.  I'd just as soon we let the whole thing drop."  He poured
some more wine in her glass.

"You don't talk much about England.  Did you enjoy it?"  She asked after
nodding her thanks.

"Mmm, that's a good question.  I think I did, I know I enjoyed getting away
from home.  The fact that I got a little homesick surprised me though."

She nodded, even though she hadn't lived in any one place that long, when
she had moved out to go to college she had felt the same.

"I didn't hang out with a lot of people, I know you probably can't imagine
in, but I was something of a loner."

Her smile brought a grin to his face.  "Really, you, a loner?  Did Oxford
not have keggers."

"They had their equivalent, but with my father's history . . . "

Both of them sobered again.  "You know what the problem is, Mulder?  We
can't have a first date kind of conversation.  We know each other too
well.  What we have to talk about, whether we want to or not, is the
problem of developing an emotional attachment with a partner."

"Developing?"  He spoke, stunned.

"Well," she backed off a little.  "When would you say you realized there
was some attachment?"  She looked down immediately and took a sip of
wine.  She was getting back into dangerous territory here.

"Okay, I guess that's a fair question.  I think I realized it, to a degree
anyway, when we were on a case in Oregon.  The power had gone out and you
knocked on my door.  I let you in, wearing only your robe."

"Mulder - "

"Hey, you asked.  I'd been treating you like shit, I didn't trust you at
all, because I knew that Blevins had sent  you to shut me down and you
still came to me when you needed reassurance.  It was a first for me and
poked a hole in an armor that I'd kept intact for years.  Then of all
things, I find you on my bed and I'm talking to you.  I'm talking about
Samantha.  How the hell that happened I still don't know.  I hadn't spoken
about her in a decade, not out loud.  Here I am sitting at your feet and
pouring my guts out, like some teenage boy with a crush."

His eyes hadn't left her face and he saw the wonder in her own eyes.

"Did you really not know what happened that night?"

"I . . . I may have, but I didn't know . . . "

"I guess it was a lot longer for you to realize we had an attachment.  At
least I think you've realized it."

She glared at him for an instant, then got serious.  "Well it didn't take
me all that long."

"When Scully?"

She took a deep breath, "On the Toomes case.  I found myself defending you
to Tom.  I'd never done that.  But it was like he was attacking my family
or something from a fourth grade playground fight."

"You talking about when he didn't want to let me in that house?"

"No, before that.  We went to lunch - "

"You had a date?"

"Not a date Mulder.  We went to lunch, that's when he brought up the case
in the first place and I volunteered us, you.  He wasn't happy about
it.  Then, that night, the night Toomes broke into my apartment, the whole
time he was there, in my mind I was screaming for you.  When you broke down
the door, it was like you heard me and I knew it was going to be okay.  I
knew you wouldn't let him hurt me."

He was gaping at her, "If . . . if this is the way we feel, why have we
waited over six years to have this talk?"

"Mulder, we work together.  An office romance - "

"Office romance?  Do you really think that what you and I have could be
considered an office romance?"

Before she could respond, the waiter appeared at their table with their
food.  She barely remembered ordering.  They ate in silence for a few
minutes, but it wasn't uncomfortable, each taking in what the other had said.

"Scully - "

"This is good, Mulder.  Would you like to try some of my salmon?"

He shook his head, allowing her the space.

When she put down her fork, finished, he tried again.  "Scully, you didn't
answer my question."

"Would you dance with me again?"

"I'd love to."  He wasn't going to get an answer until she was ready.  He
might as well give in graciously.

She came into his arms much easier this time and they enjoyed several
dances before returning to their table for coffee and to share a dessert.

As soon as the waiter left them alone again, she spoke.  "No Mulder, I
don't believe we have an office romance or a fling.  I know it's deeper
than that, but isn't that the problem?"

"It doesn't have to be, Scully."

"I don't think I could stand seeing you push me out of the way and get
injured yourself, Mulder."

He looked into her eyes for a long moment.  "Scully, this isn't a new
thing.  I would have done the same thing last year, or the year before or .
. . for as long as I can remember."

"I know."  She spoke softly and sighed.

He didn't have an answer for that.

He held the door for her again when the valet brought the car around.  She
was quiet, but she didn't seem upset, more contemplative.  The problem was,
he wasn't sure that was good.

They'd been driving about ten minutes when he heard her clear her throat,
in preparation to speak.  He waited quietly.

"Mulder . . . "  She wouldn't look at him.  "Do you really think you could
make me come?"

The car jerked as he nearly lost control.  He pulled to the side of the
road and looked over at her.  "Yeah, Scully.  Or die trying."

That startled a laugh from her.  "You think I'd be that difficult?"

He looked deeply into her eyes then.  "Do you trust me?"

She nodded solemnly.  "Then the only real question is, your place or mine?"

"I have clean sheets."  Scully's lips twitched.

"Your place."  He grinned and pulled back into traffic.

*****

She opened her door and he followed her inside.  "What . . . what do we do
now?"

"Now, you just relax.  Have a seat there on the couch, I'll be right
back."  He slipped off his jacket and loosened his tie.

She expected him to head toward the bedroom, but instead he moved into the
kitchen.  She sank onto the couch trying to keep her mind a careful blank.

He emerged a couple of minutes later with two glasses of wine.  He saw the
liquid tremble slightly as she took a glass in her hand.  He sat at the
other end of the couch and placed his own glass on the coffee table, then
lifted her feet, dropping her shoes on the floor.

"What are you doing?"

"Massaging your feet.  Just lean back and let me relax you, okay?"

She nodded and watched him; his concentration on making her feel good was
extraordinary.  After a few minutes, he placed her feet back on the
floor.  "Turn around Scully."

"What?"

"Let me rub your shoulders."

She kind of nodded and turned her back to him.  His hands were warm and
smooth.  He had given her shoulder rubs in the past, nothing wrong with that.

After a few minutes he leaned down to her ear.  "You know Scully, nothing
has to happen tonight.  After six years, I'm not about to rush you."

"Sure Mulder, get me all revved up and then leave - is that your
plan?"  But she said it lightly and he could feel the tension had not
returned to her shoulders.

"Well then, Agent Scully, I need a favor."

"What would that be?"  She asked cautiously, but for some reason not
fearing whatever this man would request.

"Scully, I want to look at you."

She turned then and looked at him questioningly.

He rose and pulled her gently to her feet.  Barefoot, he towered even
taller over her.  He started toward her bedroom, still holding her hand,
carrying their wine glasses in his other.  Oh.

She said nothing.  She wasn't a virgin, though she realized she'd been less
nervous then.  To be honest, it hadn't mattered as much.  Rather than
'giving it away', she'd more 'gotten rid of it' to see what her friends
were talking about.

Maybe that was her problem now.  She hadn't waited until she was ready,
until she'd found someone special.  Special like this man was.

"Scully?  You with me?"

She took a deep breath and managed a small smile.

After a second he nodded and turned her toward the bed.  He slowly lowered
the zipper on her dress and let it fall to the floor.  She'd made it easy
on him; she was only wearing a bra and panties underneath, no stockings or
slip.

He turned her back toward him.  Her body was as beautiful as he had always
imagined.  How the hell had he waited this long?  He helped her step from
the dress and draped it over a chair, then reached around her and unclasped
her bra.  He tossed the bra to the chair as well and cupped her full
breasts in his hands.  She shuddered as his thumbs caressed her
nipples.  They hardened to little buds and he smiled.  Only her mind was
ambivalent about this.

"Do you know how beautiful you are?"

She blinked, unable to speak.  He leaned closer and kissed her forehead
then moved on down to her eyelids, nose and finally lips.  He nipped and
nibbled on them as he moved her toward the bed.  When the back of her knees
touched the bed, he stopped.

"Scully?"

She nodded and he pulled down the covers and helped her recline.  He
removed his tie and shirt, then toed off his shoes and lay beside her.

"Mu . . . Mulder?"

"Um?"  His lips had moved down to her throat.  His hand remained busy
exploring her body, caressing her belly and finally brushing the curls at
her core.

She gasped then and he slowed.  "Scully, I don't want to rush you."

"You're . . . you're not."

He smiled faintly at that.  "I'm not sure about that.  I want you
Scully.  But if this isn't right for you . . . "

She closed her eyes then, not able to look at him.  "What if you can't . .
. what if . . . "

"You said you trusted me."

"I do."

"Then all I want you to do is relax."  He moved away from her and he
processed the sound she made as a whimper.  He might have imagined it, but
this was important, no way was he going to rush her.

He handed her the wineglass.  "Do you have to get me drunk to do this."

"No.  I don't want you drunk.  I want you to want this as much as I do, but
I want you not to be stressed about it.  I want you to enjoy it."

She took the wine, "That's what I want too."  She spoke faintly.

"You're putting too much pressure on yourself.  It's me Scully, Mulder, you
know me and most of the time you like me."

That brought a smile to her face.  "Yeah, most of the time."

"We're friends?"

She nodded.

"You ever slept with a friend before?"

Now she shook her head slightly.

He waggled his eyebrows.  "Then let me handle this Scully.  You just lie
back and enjoy."

She laughed nervously then.  "All of this because I was so pissed off at you?"

"Yeah.  I should have done something to tick you off years ago."

Now she laughed out loud.  "Right."  He pressed the glass closer to her
lips and she drank.  Then he tilted the glass toward his own lips and
sipped a little himself.

He returned to her navel then and licked her with his wine wet tongue.  She
shivered slightly, but he noted she moved to stay in contact with his tongue.

He smiled to himself and continued his exploration of parts of Scully's
body that he had only fantasized about in the past.  His hands seemed to
have a mind of their own, touching, caressing and enjoying the feel of her
silky skin.

When he finally allowed himself to nuzzle her damp curls, she didn't tense
up.  She did trust him.  He wanted this to be good for her; hell, he was
going to be her first for all intents and purposes and that was going to be
as special as he could make it.

This was a new aroma for him; he could sense Scully, but this was
new.  This was the scent of her arousal and he had caused it.

He let his fingers entice her as he watched her face.  Her eyes were
closed, but her face was still full of wonder.  Had she really not ever had
this before?  Her body was made for this, why had no man ever taken this
time?  Or had she not let any man get this close.  That's what he'd like to
believe.

While he watched her, he slipped a finger inside of her and she bucked, her
eyes flying open.  "It's okay Scully."

She nodded and he slipped a second finger into her warmth.  She was tight,
but she didn't feel tense.  He withdrew and moved down her body.  His
tongue replaced his fingers and she jerked.  "Mulder, no."

"Why not Scully?"

"It's . . ."

"Too personal?  I want to be very personal with you.  Just relax; feel.  I
won't hurt you."

"I know."  She whispered.

He returned to her body and in seconds had her writhing underneath
him.  Now his tongue and fingers were in play and he heard her moan.

She was ready; now could he get her to go over the edge?  He pressed firmly
on the tiny bundle of nerves he had been teasing and was rewarded with her
eyes flying open and her entire body convulsing toward him.

He smiled and folded her into his arms to keep her secure as these new
sensations coursed through her.

When her breathing even out enough to speak, she looked up at him.  He was
grinning like a fool and color flooded her face.

"Any questions, Scully?"

"I should be more furious now than I was a few days ago."

"What?  Are you going to tell me - "

"You've held out on me that you could do this for all these years?  I
should never speak to you again."

"But Scully, if you did that, you'd never know what else I can do."

"Just how angry do I have to get for you to show me the rest?"

"Ummm, good question.  Just how angry do you think you can get?  This could
be real fun . . . "





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