Just Fine by Shannon Kizzia (lmelao@earthlink.net) Rating: NC-17 for sexual content Archive: Just ask first please. :) Spoilers: all things, mild movie references Summary: In the aftermath of the big first time, Mulder and Scully figure out that it's really okay. Keywords: post-episode, Mulder/Scully romance Category: SRH Author's Notes: This is pure fluff and smut. Relax with a glass of wine or Yoo-Hoo and turn off your angst!brain. I needed for them to have some fun. I took some liberties with the office, Scully's "area" in particular. My apologies if you don't like how I've redecorated. It's really nothing major. Thanks again to the incredibly fabulous Gillian Anderson for "all things". And thanks to my peeps, Jason, Indi, and Mai for their feedback. :) Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. They belong to CC and 1013 and Gillian and David and Sheila Larken. Thanks for letting me borrow them. I wish I were making money on it. I need the cash. ;p Just Fine By Shannon Kizzia Mother fucker. That's my first thought when I wake to find Scully gone from my bed. I don't know what to think, so I automatically fear the worst: that Scully came in my room last night, we fucked, and she got scared sometime in the middle of the night and took off. Shit. I scrub my face to clear away the sleep and let my eyes roam the dark room, trying to see some sign of her, straining to hear her moving about the apartment. But there is nothing. She's just gone. And I'm a huge schmuck. I should have known. Two people just can't be friends and FBI partners for seven years and then up and decide to screw each other. It's as impossible as Krycek growing another arm or Skinner sprouting hair. I should have known she'd run scared. Maybe she never even meant it to signal something new in our relationship. Maybe it was supposed to be a one night stand. Maybe I was just bad. Goddamn it, Scully! How the fuck are we supposed to go back to work together Monday morning?! I throw the covers off me and get up to go take a piss. I stalk into the bathroom, fuming and near enraged to tears. And that's when I see it. The note stuck to the mirror. I rip it off, still quite sure I'm about to read a Dear John letter. I take a breath and read: Mulder, I have to meet mom for breakfast this morning. I'm so sorry I have to go. I wanted to wake up in your arms. But I've had this date for weeks. Charlie is flying into town this afternoon, so I have to spend the rest of the weekend with family. I hope you're not mad that I didn't wake you up. You were sleeping so well. I'll see you Monday. You were wonderful. Dana I go from pissed beyond meaning to way too happy with myself in about 5 seconds. And then I feel overwhelmingly guilty. How could I have doubted her? Scully is the one who took all the big steps yesterday. She invited herself over to my place for some tea and a talk. She told me about Daniel. (I hate that fucker.) The ever faithful Catholic, she confided in me that she communicated with god in a Buddhist temple. She put it all out there, her cute stocking feet propped up on my coffee table, her head leaned against the back of my couch. She put her trust in me just like she's done consistently all these years. She fell asleep on my sofa and I brushed her hair away from her face and covered her with a blanket. And later, when I had fallen asleep in my bed, she had come in, the sound of her footsteps bringing me awake. She let me watch her as she undressed by the side of the bed. Silent. I sat up as she came to stand in front of me. She took my hands and put them on her breasts. She stood between my legs and held my hands to her breasts as she stared into my eyes, telling me her heart, wanting me to touch her body, wanting to be finally and completely together. It was all her. How could I doubt after that? I berate myself all through my shower and shave, but hunger becomes predominant and I decide that hey, Scully and I are going to be lovers. I should be dancing a fucking jig, not wallowing in guilt and angst. So I do. Dance a jig that is. And then I get dressed and walk/skip down the street to grab a humongous, greasy breakfast down at Big Pete's Pancake Palace. **** "Dana?" "Yeah, Mom?" "You look different. Did you do something to your hair?" I finish chewing my bite of omelet and try to look impassive. "No. Nothing." "Oh," my mom says in that way that lets me know she's going to continue to try to think about how I seem different. I must be "glowing". How typical. I don't care. I really don't. I'll just go ahead and glow. It's not like I can help it. I can still feel his hands on me. I can still smell him. I didn't take a shower and I can smell his cologne on me, his sweat, his cum. God, I hope she can't smell me. I take a drink of my ice water and eye my mother over the rim. Okay, so I'm a little uneasy. I'm not sure if I want to discuss my new found love-life with my mother, especially in a half-full restaurant. We've always been able to talk about relationships and love and even sex, but this is a little different. And even though I know my mom adores Mulder to death, I'm still not sure I'm ready to spill these beans. It's still so new. I don't even know what's going on in Mulder's mind right now. It just won't do to have mom picking out place cards and center pieces when neither Mulder nor myself really knows what the hell is going on. The sex was great. More than great, but we still have to talk about it. She interrupts my thoughts with another guess. "Are you wearing more make-up than usual? Your cheeks are all rosy." "No, Mom." I push the food around on my plate. She leans forward and narrows her eyes, inspecting me. "What's going on?" I groan, "Mom. Stop staring at me. Everything's fine." She shrugs and goes back to her Eggs Benedict. After a few moments she starts talking to me about Bill and his promotion, her friend, Rita, and her new grandchild, the tomato plants and how the grub worms are particularly bad this year. I nod and add my murmurs of appreciation, dismay, surprise. This is what we do. I talk a little about my work. She talks a lot about her life. But today, I'm having a really hard time listening. I keep thinking about Mulder and what happened between us. I keep feeling the telling blush creep onto my cheeks and across my chest. I'm hearing my mother's voice and it's like bees buzzing. It's getting louder. I'm starting to sweat. I gulp my water. Mulder's sleep-drunk eyes. Mulder kissing his way down my bare back. Mulder moaning into my mouth. "Miracle Grow, my foot! They're all still the size of marbles!" Mulder spreading my folds with his fingers. Mulder pushing his finger inside me. Mulder telling me he loves how I taste. "Aunt Patrice called. Uncle Don is back in the hospital with that colon...thing." Mulder holding my face in his hands as he thrusts between my thighs. Mulder coming inside me and moaning my name. "Your brother's plane comes in at 3 o'clock..." Mulder. Mulder... "I had sex with Mulder!" It seems to echo through the restaurant. "ulder..ulder...ulder...." And then there is absolute quiet. You could hear ants cough in this silence. We both sit stunned. Did I just *yell* that??? Oh my God. I want to crawl under the table and die. My mother has this look on her face. I wish I knew what that was. What do I do now? How can I take it back? Who says that? I had sex with Mulder?! Not, "Mom I have some news," or even "Guess what I did last night." That a way, Dana. Just shock the hell out of her. "You...you what?" She is still unreadable. Did I inherit that non-expression? "I, um...Mulder and I.... We had sex last night," I finish in a slightly defensive, slightly guilty half whisper. I drag my eyes from the table and look at her. Slowly a gigantic smile spreads across her face and my eyes widen with the knowledge that the woman is happy! "Dana, it's about damned time!" She takes both my hands in hers and actually bounces in her chair. I'm afraid she might squeal. No mother should be this happy about their kid having sex. It's not natural. "Oh, honey. Fox is such a good man. I'm so happy for you both!" "Don't freak out on me, Mom. This is still a really new thing. I don't know what's going to happen now. Please, don't go telling anyone." She gives my hands a squeeze. "No, no, no. I wouldn't do that. I respect your privacy." "Thanks, Mom. I appreciate that." Suddenly, she gets a disturbing gleam in her eye. "So.... How was it?" "Oh my god. Mom!" I withdraw my hands from hers and cross my arms over my chest. "I can't tell you that!" "Well, why not? I may be your mother, but I'm also a woman and I'd like to think that you consider me your friend." I nod reluctantly. "So.... Is he big?" "Mom!!" "Was it slow and romantic or in a rush and passionate?" "Mom!!!" "Well, at least tell me if he's a good kisser!" I put a hand to my face and feel the heat there and look up uncertainly at my mother. She looks so honest and interested that I have to smile. "Yes, Mom, he's an amazing kisser." I can't help it. I feel like I'm smiling all over. "Everything about last night was amazing. I've never felt like that. He was gentle and powerful and sweet and rough and everything I was always so afraid to fantasize about or hope for. Mom, it was perfect. I'm so happy. It's been so long." She nods sagely at me and, though I am blushing and feeling a little strange about telling my mother how Mulder was in bed, I find I'm just near busting with needing to talk about it. "It was like we'd been together a million times, but it was so unfamiliar and exciting at the same time. I can't explain it. He knew how to be, what to do, but it wasn't like we were trying or concentrating on it. It just happened so naturally." She's looking at me in that mom way...really looking *into* me rather than at me. I giggle and shift uncomfortably in my seat. "How did it happen? Did he ask you? Did he just pounce? Or was he gentlemanly about it?" "Uh...it was me, Mom. He was asleep. I kind of woke him up and...." Am I really telling her this? What has sex with Mulder *done* to me? "Oh my." It's my mother's turn to blush. But she's smiling like she's proud or something. I think I might just be too embarrassed, and happy, to exist. "Look, Mom. I love you and you *are* my friend, but we really have to change the subject. I just can't talk about Mulder with you right now." "Okay, okay." She forks a piece of egg and half holds it in front of her mouth as she looks away from me and mutters, "I'm not the one who told the whole place they had sex." "You're funny," I deadpan, then on a whim, I lean across the table and she leans in to hear my whisper. "Oh and one more thing. It's *really* big." My mother throws her head back and cackles. I motion to the waiter for the check. It's going to be a long weekend. **** I have my panic face on. I hit the elevator button and wait, looking up at the numbers. I have on my best suit. The one I know she really likes. The gray one that cost me way too much. She never out and out said she liked it, but whenever I wear it she gives me the once over...slowly. I'm so hot. I feel like stripping down to my boxers. What did they do, turn the thermostat up 20 degrees?! I'm going to have to shed this jacket. And this goddamned noose of a tie! The elevator doors open and I step in, feeling like I'm going to the Inquisition. It's early yet. I don't think she'll be down there already. I hope not. I need a few moments to get over this panic I'm in. I bounce on the balls of my feet as the elevator comes to a painfully slow stop. I step out of the elevator and into the basement. I walk purposefully down the hall and use my key in our office door. I take a breath and open it. Good. No Scully. I go to the desk, peeling off my jacket as I go. I flop down in the chair and take off my tie, unbuttoning the top two buttons on my shirt. There. That's better. I even feel some of my panic fade. I've had all weekend to think about Scully and me. All weekend to worry. What if she was just being nice in the note? What if I've lost my touch? It *has* been ages after all. And I'm not 21 anymore. But it sure *felt* really good. Way beyond really good, in fact. I can't have just imagined that, imagined that she clawed at my back, pressed her breasts up into my hands, came loudly as I fucked her. But what if she walks in and it's business as usual? What if she's pissed? Why would she be pissed? Well, she *could* be pissed. She's been pissed at me before for no apparent reason. Scully's hot when she's pissed. She gets that crease between her eyebrows and she turns pink and her breathing gets heavier so that her chest rises and falls and strains against her blouse.... There. Aroused is much better than scared shitless. Not that I'm not still pretty freaked out. But now I'm freaked out with a hard-on. On second thought, maybe I should avoid lustful thoughts about Scully. We *do* have to work today. My brain is making entirely too much noise. I decide to get up and rummage through the file cabinets. I get halfway there and suddenly there she is in the doorway. I didn't even hear her heels clicking down the hall. And shit, she looks good. She's in a cream colored silk blouse that is see-through enough that I can make out her pink bra underneath. She's in a charcoal skirt. Oh, good. It's the short one. And she's not wearing hose. I realize I've been staring at her body and I hastily bring my eyes back to hers. I manage to smile at her. "Good morning." I hold onto the edge of the desk for support. I hope it just looks suave and relaxed. Oh thank God, her lips turn up in a tiny little smile. That's got to be a good sign, right? "Good morning yourself." She comes in and drops her briefcase in her area, then turns around to face me. She looks like she's not sure what to do with her hands. They fiddle with some papers on her desk, then smooth down her skirt, then settle at her sides. "How was your visit with Charlie?" There. I've put my knowledge of the note out there and managed to ask an innocent question. "It was really nice. Thank you." We're kind of staring at each other now. She doesn't look like she's going to say more. I nod at her, continuing to smile innocuously. Suddenly she speaks again. "How was the rest of your weekend?" "Good. The usual. Laundry and basketball games." I really, really, really want to say more, want to talk about what we're avoiding talking about, but I need a sign from her that it's okay. I don't have to wait long. She looks shyly down at the papers on her desk. "I missed you." With agonizing slowness, she raises her eyes to meet mine. They are so big and blue and wet. I just want to crush her to me. "I missed you, too, Scully." We both break into shy, toothy smiles. God, this is good. This is almost as good as the sex. "I think that was the longest weekend of my life," she laughs and rolls her eyes. "I wanted to call you...or to just stop by your place or something, but I wasn't sure if that would be okay." "Scully, I can't tell you how okay that would have been." We both laugh. She bites her lower lip. I say, "I guess we do need to talk about things, though. To just come up with some ground rules. You do...want to....keep...." "Yes!" Her loud answer makes me smile wider. She reddens and looks down again. "Mulder, I want this to happen between us. I can't tell you what the other night meant to me. I've spent this weekend hoping that it means the same thing to you." "It does, Scully. It really, really does." I cross the distance between us as take her hand in mine. She looks up at me. "So how do we do this?" I ask. "I don't know. I mean...I'm not sure." Her voice is so sexy. I run my thumb along the back of her hand. We're looking into each others' eyes and in my mind I'm back in bed with her. I remember how she kissed my chest, how she took my cock in her hands and stroked up and down. But we're in the office. We're in our suits. I can't think about wanting her here. We need to talk about how to handle this, how to balance the sex with our partnership, our friendship, and the work. She speaks again. "They really need to give out rule books for this. I guess we'll just have to take it one step at a time." Her voice has dropped an octave. Her breathing has deepened. Can just the touch of my hand be turning her on? Because she looks turned on. I feel my erection harden and strain against my pants. "Maybe we could just do what feels right, Mulder. Maybe we should just do what we feel." And with the way she now looks into my eyes, half innocence, half daring, it doesn't take two seconds and I've gone to her and taken her in my arms. I kiss her hard and her tongue immediately pushes into my mouth, almost back to my throat. Our hands fly over each others' bodies. I grope her ass with both hands and she clutches at my hair, runs her hands up and down my back. I walk her back up against the wall by her desk. She connects with a dull thud and I mumble against her mouth, "Sorry." She whispers against my open mouth, "It's okay, it's okay," and then we're again kissing...kissing...groaning with how good it feels, and I've got one hand pressed to her lower back, pushing her belly into my rock hard cock and my other hand is creeping up her ribs to cup her breast. She tilts her head back, her hair mussing against the wall, and I drop my mouth to her neck and she groans and pushes her lower body against me and then her chest forward into my hand, undulating liquidly, rolling her sexy, little body against me, against my touch. "We shouldn't be doing this here," I say into her throat. "We need to have a rule against this." "Shut up, Mulder, and fuck me against this wall." I step away from her long enough to spin her around to face the wall. I push her up against it with my body pressed tightly to her backside. Her left cheek is pressed up against the surface, hands splayed at shoulder height. I nudge her legs apart with mine and drag my hands up the outsides of her thighs. "Yes," she breathes. I push her skirt up her legs, reach up higher and wrestle her panties off her hips and down past her knees and ankles. She kicks them off and once again spreads her legs for me. I take my hands off of her long enough to undo my belt and my fly. I take my cock out of my pants, lift her skirt over her little ass, and guide myself inside her. "Yeeeeeees!" she sighs and I start to move in and out of her with long, deep strokes. My hands wedge in between the wall and her breasts. She's now mewling like a kitten. "Scully, you feel so good," I say into her hair. "God, you're so hot and tight." "You get me so wet," she whimpers to me. "I've wanted to fuck you like this for so long. I've always wanted to fuck you in the office," I say into her ear. "Me, too," she sighs and then yells, "Oh, Jesus! That's good!" "I've always wanted to know what you feel like...what you sound like. Oh God, Scully. Scully...." "Faster, Mulder. I want it harder and faster. Someone could find us." She reaches down to find her own clit with her right hand and I start to slam into her forcefully. We're making quite a sound against the wall. Thunk, thunk, thunk, thunk. "That's it, Mulder. Like that. Oh God." She's grunting now and pressing her breasts against the palms of my hands, lifting her ass against each thrust of my cock into her. I slide my hands back down her body and grip her hips to hold her at just the right angle against my bucking hips. "Come for me, Scully." And then she does, shouting my name. Five furious strokes later, I'm with her and in a blinding force, I'm spilling into her. I push into her one last time and stay there in her hot little pussy. My breath stirs her beautiful, red hair. She takes her hand from her clit and before she can brace it once more against the wall as she comes down from her orgasm, I take it and suck her juices clean from her finger. She groans and we breathe together against the wall, not wanting to end it, but knowing the longer we stay the more dangerous it becomes. Finally, I step away from her and settle her skirt back down over her ass. She turns to me, a lopsided smile on her face. I can't help but lean into her again, one hand propped on the wall behind her head. "Well, there's fantasy number one taken care of," I say. She tucks me back into my pants and zips me up, her smile naughty. "Rule number one: no more sex in the office....unless we just have to." We both laugh. She still sounds throaty and husky from the sex and I briefly entertain taking half the day off so that I can take her home and have her over and over again until neither one of us can move another muscle. "Agreed," I say and give her one more quick kiss. She bends to pick up her discarded panties and puts them back on. "I'm going to the bathroom to freshen up." I watch her go and wonder what we've gotten ourselves into. And how I'm going to make it another 7 1/2 hours in this room with her. I think it's going to be the most wonderful kind of torture. I smile to myself as I straighten my clothes and sit contentedly behind my desk. **** I look up. He winks. I blush. I smile. He smiles. I look back down at my work. This has been going on for about 6 hours. I feel unbelievable! I want the entire FBI to know. And I don't. I'm reasonably certain Skinner would actually approve of this new turn in our relationship, but I'm also quite sure he would have our asses for getting it on at work. We really can't let that happen again. But it was soooooo GOOD! I feel my nipples harden against the satiny fabric of my bra. It's beyond my comprehension...how Mulder does this to me. It's pretty well known that I play by the rules, but when Mulder's involved, my self-imposed strict mode of behavior flies right out the window. I become this woman who lies for him, who ignores protocol, who practically begs for a slow fuck up against the wall. I flip the page of the case file I'm researching. I just can't concentrate on the work. I know this is brand new to us and I'll probably get to a place where I can juggle both, but I can't help but worry that I will always feel this way, distracted and not caring one bit. I look up. He winks. I blush. I smile. He smiles. I don't look back down at my work. "I love you." He starts. He didn't expect me to say that. I didn't expect to say it. But I'm not sorry I did. I want him to know. "I love you." He says it simply, honestly. And I know we're going to be just fine. End All feedback is welcome at lmelao@earthlink.net. :)