From: To: Subject: [XFNC17ff] Make Me Stay Date: Wednesday, October 10, 2001 9:47 PM Title: Make me Stay Author: FoxfireX foxfirex@hotmail.com Rating: **NC-17**, if you are underage don't even THINK about it Classification: MSR (what else is there?) PWP, pure smut for smut's sake Spoilers: Tiny ones for FTF, otherwise, nah Disclaimer: SO not mine. How's that Archive: Sure. Just email me and lemme know where Author's note: Another one for you, Cella, for all the encouragement, and for all the times you put up with my ranting and raving about the wrongness of S9 without Mulder. -- Dana Scully's apartment Georgetown The rain was beating against her window. She stood in silence, staring out at the empty street. Days of rain had slowed the normal activity outside her apartment to a crawl. She had taken a week off from work, hoping to get some things done around the house. She wanted to spend time with her mother. She planned to repot her neglected plants. She had a stack of books that she had intended to get to, now that she had some time. Her summer clothes needed packed away for the winter, the winter suits needed to go to the dry cleaner in preparation for the colder months. She wanted to paint the kitchen. Repaper the bathroom. take her living room rug out and have it replaced. Call old friends, write her brothers. The list went on. Instead, she was standing at her window, staring out at an empty street, missing him. Damn him, anyway. What happened to the independent woman she had created for her facade? Where did the person who was self sufficient in her own company go? Why did she continue to try to fool herself that she was complete without him. Why didn't he feel the same way? He was working. She knew, from the many phone calls she'd had from him. At least he called to talk, even if he didn't mention missing her. He was in the office, working through old files, straightening things, catching up with old contacts through email, phone calls, whatever. He wasn't going anywhere while she was home, but he wouldn't be idle. She sat down finally, at her kitchen table to enjoy a cup of tea. Well, enjoy was probably too strong a word. But, here she sat telling herself not to think about him when a knock sounded at her door. She consulted her watch. She hadn't talked to him in over an hour. Enough time for him to get here. She looked through the peephole, to see him standing there, in all his Armani glory. She sighed in frustration and opened the door. He smiled, heaven help her, and her heart lurched in her chest. Her stomach broke into butterflies. This was ridiculous. He was her partner. The same person she had worked with day in and day out for the past, whatever. Forever. Oh shit. It wasn't working. "Come in, Mulder, what brings you by?" She gestured to sofa, they both settled down on opposite ends. "Oh, nothing, really. I was wondering if you kept the receipt for the motel in North Carolina two months ago, I can't seem to find it, and I was closing out our expense reports." He settled back against the cushions. He looked like sex on a stick. Stop it, girl, she told herself. Stop it, indeed. This had to stop. She realized she was staring at him. And in a moment of stone cold fear, she realized that he realized it, too. Oh shit, again. Suddenly Dana Scully did something that she prided her self on never doing. She blew her proverbial top. "Expense reports? That's it? That's why you're here? That could have waited, Mulder!" She was shouting, she was irrational and it felt sinfully good. No more Miss Nice Girl, this was the end of suffering in silence. His face registered shock, his leg uncrossed, and both feet came to rest on the floor, his arm came off its resting place along the back of the sofa. "Scully, is something wrong?" He was plainly confused. "Wrong? No, Mulder, why in the hell would you think something is wrong?" She lept from the sofa, escaping into the kitchen. She crossed to the sink, grabbing the counter for support, staring out the window over the sink. She was NOT going to cry, she was absolutely not going to cry until he was gone. "Scully?" She jumped, his voice was right behind her, his breath puffed into her right ear, sending shivers down her spine. "Wha...." her voice left her. She cleared her throat. "What, Mulder?" Her voice remained tight, her eyes began to burn . Damn, she was going to cry in front of him. This would be the end of their partnership and their friendship. There would be no going back once she looked into his eyes. "Look at me." His voice remained low, gravely, enough of its innate sex appeal filtered through her emotionally addled brain to make her knees begin to quake. "No." Her voice regained its strength. Her determination returning. "Yes." He grabbed her by the shoulders and spun her around to face him. She glared up at him, angry that his physical strength had overpowered her will. She made a hasty decision, based on anger and irrational fear. She hit him. More to the point, she belted him. She smashed her small fist square into his abdomen, with enough force to knock the wind out of him, temporarily stunning him into loosening his grip on her shoulders. She ducked under his arms, and lunged for...anywhere away from him. She made it exactly two and a half Scully strides before his arm snaked out and caught her around the waist, the force of her foreword momentum causing her feet to fly foreword closelined by his arm. The battle was officially on. He pulled her to his body, not even sure why he was insisting on tussling with her. She was full fledged mad, and she was rapidly pissing him off, he didn't even know why. "Scully! Knock it off. What is going on with you?" He was shouting, she was struggling. The whole situation was rapidly deteriorating into a two person rumble. "Let me go right damn now, Mulder and I might not shoot you again." He opened his mouth to yell at her again, just as her foot came down on his instep. They didn't teach self defense for nothing at the Bureau. "Ow! Damn it Scully! He jumped on the non-injured foot, completely releasing his grip on her. "Why in the hell did you do that?" He was still shouting, and becoming more pissed off by the second. "Get out. Just get out of my house, Mulder." She threw open the door, her red hair in wild disarray, chest heaving with exertion, anger and, yes, damn him, excitement. "What the hell is this? Why are you doing this? Talk to me, Scully." He jerked the door from her hands, slamming it closed turning the lock and leaning against it, crossing his arms over his chest. She was officially through with his presence in her house. Possibly in her life. She couldn't live with the constant angst anymore, and it had to come to an end. For her own sanity. "I don't want to talk, Mulder, we talk all the time and we say nothing. No more. I can't take any more. I need to be away from you, from us. It's time we made a break. For my sake. Just go." Her eyes blurred with tears. Her hands began to tremble, her bottom lip quivering. She was so close to a complete breakdown, and she could not do it in his presence. His heart dropped from his chest, and landed somewhere just south of hell. Away from him. She wanted out. Nevermind that he had advised her after Dallas to leave him. Forget that the level of her safety would be directly proportionate to the distance between them. She was leaving. More than that, she was throwing him out of her life, forcefully and angrily. He took the only option left open to him. He panicked. As completely as he had that night she had come to his apartment to say she was quitting. He had tried to kiss her that night, to attempt to convey the emotion he was feeling for her. That had dire consequences. What would the ramifications be this time if he pulled out the stops to show her how much he loved her, how much he needed her. How selfish could he be? His anger diffused, his arms reached out toward her in a pose of supplication. Naked fear and pain written on his features. Her breath hitched in throat. His anguish rocked her. She did not expect it to be so immediate and complete. She expected his arguments, his rationalization for her to let him stay. She did not plan to watch his heart break in front of her eyes. How could this be? He didn't love her in that way, did he? He spoke, his voice a broken whisper. "Scully...no...please....don't do this to me. I won't survive it." His jaw snapped shut, suddenly aware of what he had just admitted to her. His eyes closed, squeezing the tears to run freely down his face. His arms dropped to his sides. "Mulder...." she took a step toward him, his hands came up to ward her off, never opening his eyes. "Don't, please, if you're going to tell me to go, don't touch me, it hurts too much." He ended on a sob. He was the one having the breakdown, and he didn't care that she was witness to it. He didn't care about anything. His life just ended, his body just hadn't caught the drift yet. He turned to go, attempting to swallow his sobs. Her hand closed around his upper arm, stilling him. "Don't go.." her voice was now a whisper, too. "Don't leave, Mulder. I only wanted you to leave me because I couldn't take any more of this dance we were doing. I want to be with you, I want to love you, but you kept turning away, making jokes, ignoring what began between us after Dallas. I decided that I couldn't be with you day in and day out and not *be* with you. It hurt too much. Tell me you want me, tell me you want to love me, too, and stay Mulder. Let's stop this charade and get on with out lives." Her whisper ended in a plea, her blue eyes searching his face, half turned to face her, his body still turned toward the door. His eyes remained closed, the tears still streaming down his face. "I want you more than I have wanted anything in my life, Scully. I love you more than my own life. I'm so sorry I never told you. I'm sorry I was afraid of my feelings, of the consequences. I thought I was protecting you, by not loving you, but they took you anyway. It made no difference in the end, I never held you in my arms, and they harmed you to control me. I'm tired of hiding, I want to be with you, and damn the rest of the world." "Then be with me, Mulder. Show me." She gasped as he turned into her, scooping her up into his arms, striding toward her bedroom. She sometimes forgot how big a man he really was, especially compared to her small frame. He stood her on her feet next to the bed, his eyes never leaving hers as his mouth descended. He held the back of her head with his left hand, his right spanning her tiny waist, grasping and pulling her body toward his. The heat radiating from his body was incredible. It threatened to burn her alive. His tongue slid along her bottom lip, then into her mouth, thrusting and stroking, previewing things to come. She reveled in the softness of his lips, he had an amazing mouth. Somehow she knew it would feel this good on hers. He broke the kiss and she groaned in protest, causing him to smile. Her breath caught in her throat. He was so beautiful when he smiled. He did it far too infrequently, she vowed to put a smile on his face more often. He caught the hem of her shirt, and pulled it over her head. The smooth curve of her breasts heaved over the edge of her bra, her gold cross lie against her flushed skin. She reached up and loosened his tie, unbuttoning the collar of his shirt so he could slip it off. She pushed his jacket from his shoulder, letting it fall to the floor, then returning her attention to the buttons on his shirt. When she had pushed his shirt to the floor and divested him of his white tee underneath, she took a step back to look at his chest. It heaved with his own rasping breaths, his nipples hardened to points. She reached out and traced the line of his pectoral muscles, reveling in the way they jumped under her hand. She followed the light dusting of hair from his sternum, down over his navel, to the waistband of his slacks. She continued on, unfastening him, unzipping him, pushing his trousers and boxers down, eyes never leaving the impressive erection she had just freed. Her hands locked on his hips, he toed his shoes and socks off and slipped out of the remainder of his clothes pooled at his feet. Scully reached around, unfastening her bra allowing her breasts to sway gently with her movements. He found himself mesmerized by her actions, she continued to strip, until she was naked as he. "Ohhhh Scully, you are so beautiful. More so than I ever dreamed." He swayed on his feet, reaching out for her, but she stayed his hands. Her eyes held a gleam of mischief, as she slid herself down his body, her hands still clasping his lean lips. She came to her knees, breath puffing out over his erection, causing his knees to unlock. She glanced once more up into his eyes, and parted her lips to slide his shaft into her mouth. He made an unintelligible sound in the back of his throat, his eyes threatening to close with the intensity of the pleasure but he forced them to remain open. Here on her knees was his ultimate sexual fantasy, with her swollen red lips wrapped around his cock. She slid him all the way in, he felt himself bumping the back of her throat. His head vibrated as she hummed her pleasure. Her tongue spiraled around his length as she slid him back out of her mouth, then down again, her cheeks hollowing with the force of her suction. Her hands left his hips, sliding around to his buttocks, squeezing and pulling him deeper into her mouth. He watched her breasts sway with more force, as her movements increased. It was too much. "Sc....Scully, stop, please stop..." He reached for her upper arms, pulling, trying to bring her to her feet. She released him with a pop, breaking the suction, and rose to stand before him. He grabbed her head again, crushing her mouth under his, sliding his hands down her nude body. When he reached her rounded bottom, he lifted and parted, wrapping her legs around his waist, and tumbling them both onto the bed. Her hair fanned out around her from the impact, she smiled brilliantly up at him, loving the sight of him above her. His hazel eyes shifted from delight at her mirth, to intense as his lean muscular body settled along her softness. The enormity of what was about to happen was almost enough to push him over the edge. His right arm cradled her head, as his lips found hers, trailing along her chin, down her arched neck, nipping gently at her ear. His left hand smoothed down the curves of her body, circling her nipple, cupping and squeezing as her body pushed up against his hand, wanting more. His mouth continued it's onslaught, over her collarbone, latching on her left nipple, as his hand continued on down the right side of her body he wanted to taste her all over, but he didn't want to release his grip on her. She moaned under him as his hand found the curls covering her sex. She wanted that contact so badly, she though she'd go insane if he didn't touch her there. "Please, Mulder....touch me..." she panted. His fingers curled into her wetness, sinking into her, sending two of his long slender digits deep inside her. He released her nipple to nuzzle her neck. "You're so wet Scully, is that all for me?" His voice was pure sex. He punctuated his question with a thrust with his hand, causing her hips to lift off the bed, and causing Scully to moan...loudly. "Yes....yesyesyes...all for you...". He continued to stroke in and out of her as she began to moan continuously. He decided he could wait no longer to taste her and shifted his position, rising above her never taking his fingers out of her body. Sensing what was coming, she bent her knees and allowed them to fall open. On his knees, Mulder bent over and hovered his face just above her pulsating core. He inhaled her scent, savoring it, cataloging it in his vast mind to hold there for the rest of his life. Focusing again on the task at hand, he lowered his mouth, lips closing on her hooded clit, continuing his ministrations with his hand. It took the sum total of five seconds before her shoulders rose from the bed and she screamed as the waves of her orgasm took her over. The walls of Scully's vagina continued to contract around his fingers as he again rose above her, raising his upper body so that he could throw her legs over his thighs, positioning her hips for his entry. He slid his fingers out as she whimpered in protest of the loss of contact. Her whimpers returned to moans of ecstasy as he used his wet fingers to part her folds and guided his cock into her. He was inside her. It was more than he could wrap his mind around. He gritted his teeth and held still inside her, waiting for her to adjust to him and give him a sign that she was comfortable enough to continue. "Ahhh....fuck me Mulder...please don't stop... fuck me fuck me..." . Sounded like a sign to him. He began to thrust into her, her walls still fluttering from her first orgasm, pulling him deeper, deeper, straight to her heat, into the flames of her center. The hard steel of his cock covered with velvety softness felt so right inside her. He felt like concentrated fire, threatening to consume her. She wanted to stay under him forever, to hell with the outside world. Nothing had ever felt so good or so right, nothing had ever made her feel so complete and whole. She was on the verge of another orgasm, this one coming so intensely it scared her, and in a moment of panic, she almost broke contact with him. But, sensing her fear as he always could, even when she herself did not always admit it, he began speaking to her. "So close Scully...come with me baby.....don't fight it...give over to it, I'm here, I've got you...come to me Scully...come to me..." . His eyes tightened at the corners, his face becoming a mask of passion as his own orgasm began coiling in his belly, he couldn't hold out much longer. Then it happened. Scully wasn't sure if it was simply the amazing sensation alone, or his voice that was the trigger, but she was suddenly in the middle of the most intense orgasm of her life. She screamed his name, over and over again, she couldn't stop calling for him, pleading for him, sobbing for him. Watching her come apart brought him right behind her. He thrust into her fast, hard, his movements becoming disjointed and losing their rhythm as he exploded into her over and over. As his hips shuddered to a stop, he collapsed on the bed, rolling to his side taking her with him. He clasped her to his chest, their breathing harsh and short, slowing along with their heartrates, beating in time as they had for so many years without their realizing it. They were home, in each other's arms. The search for meaning and purpose complete now. "I love you, Scully." He murmured, near sleep but not losing his grip on her. "I love you too, Mulder. Feels like I always have." -- end