From: Donna Honeycutt To: Subject: [XFNC17ff] Reposted - Switched Date: Tuesday, December 11, 2001 8:46 AM Title - Switched Author - Donna Email address - donnah@pop.uky.edu URL - www.geocities.com/Area51/Quadrant/4571/ Rating - NC-17 Category - MSR Spoilers - Series through 6th season Keywords - MSR, angst Summary - What if you wake up one morning and everything's normal, except everyone you know? Feedback Please I think... Disclaimer - Mulder, Scully, the Lone Gunman and Skinner all belong to Chris Carter,10-13 and Fox. No infringement intended Author's Note - For those of you still watching the remains of the X-file, I was delighted to see that they are finally catching up with Fan Fiction - I wrote my version of this story in December 1999. Switched Mulder spotted her across the room, her arms laden with files of some kind. He angled toward her, avoiding people and desks until he was right up with her. "Scully, need some help?" He was practically leaning over her and leering in her ear. She didn't respond, veering into an empty cubicle and emptying her arms onto the desk. "Can I help you Agent?" She looked up at him, not a trace of warmth in her expression. "Agent? You mad at me Scully?" He now took in her body language, definitely not in a friendly mood. What had happened? He searched his memory quickly for what transgression he might have committed this time. He stepped closer. "Excuse me?" She backed away one step and he realized she was in no playful mood. "Scully?" He took her upper arms into his hands. "Are you okay?" "Get your hands off of me." She hissed this at him, glancing toward the entrance of the cubicle to make sure they were unobserved. "Scully, what?" His concern for her was growing rapidly and caused his hands to tighten on her shoulders. His complete trust of her causing him to miss all signals of danger to himself. He was completely vulnerable to her when her knee made contact with that most sensitive of areas and his hands were no longer holding her, protecting instead his violated manhood as he bent double with the pain. No words emerged; he was trying too desperately not to lose the small breakfast he'd eaten this morning. She stepped around him and turned. "You have five minutes to recover and get out of my area. If you're not gone, I'll press charges." And she was gone from his sight. No longer able to stand, he sank gingerly into the chair and tried to recover his breath. What the hell? He'd done nothing to warrant this. Hell, he couldn't recall anything that would cause this kind of reaction from her since they'd met. His five minutes were almost up and he didn't doubt she was somewhere close by watching the clock to make certain he emerged on time. No way he wanted a repeat of what had just happened. It was a good thing he'd never planned to have children, she'd probably made that a moot point anyway. Damn! He managed to regain his feet and walked with what he hoped looked like a normal gait to the elevator and headed for the basement. Once in his office he sank into his own chair and tried to decide if an ice pack would aid his recovery. He didn't bother to boot up his computer or even glance at the papers scattered on the desk. His mind was running over the encounter this morning, what had set her off? She'd been okay yesterday, so whatever it was had happened after they left here. She had left for home before he did, and her car was gone when he finally made it to the parking garage. Did something happen at her apartment? Not that involved him, and he hadn't called her and woken her during the night, so she shouldn't be ticked at him about that. Of course "ticked" didn't quite cover it. He saw the door opening out of the corner of his eye and turned, ready this time to defend himself. He was not, however, prepared for Diana to walk in. "What are you doing here?" He asked crossly. She hesitated just inside the door. "Well, good morning to you too partner." And came on in, removing her coat to hang beside his. Partner? What the hell was she talking about? "Word has it you tried your charm on the Ice Queen this morning. A little word of advice, Fox? Stick to the secretarial pool, they don't have the same hand to hand combat training." Her eyes showed her hurt, but she didn't comment on it and he had no intention of getting into this with her. When he remained silent, she proceeded on to the other desk in the room, which in his battered state this morning he really hadn't processed, and sat down. She booted up the computer and reached for a file on top of what seemed to be her desk. "What's going on here?" He demanded, turning to face her for the first time. "That should be my question, Fox. What's wrong with you this morning? If you're hung over again, don't expect sympathy from me." "Hung over?" He looked at her stung. He didn't drink, maybe he had some back when they'd been together, but since he'd teamed up with Scully he hadn't had more than a beer or two a month. And that usually with Scully over pizza while they were arguing a case. He stuck to ice tea now and had for years. "Listen, I don't care what you do in your spare time anymore Fox. Could we just get down to work?" This was obviously a lie on her part, but he didn't want to pursue it now. Scully was top priority and was that it? Did she think he had requested Diana to work down here? He had been completely surprised when Diana had entered the office. Scully knew better, but for whatever reason she seemed to have a blind spot where Diana was concerned. Since Diana didn't seem to have any intention of leaving, he decided to try to get a little work done himself. He'd give Scully some time to cool off and then try to find out what had set her off this morning. He quickly realized that Scully was not the only thing that was "off" this morning. He didn't recognize a single file on the desk as he began to flip through the paper surrounding him while he waited for his computer to come on-line. He glanced over at Diana, but she was working, head down, obviously ignoring him and still in a snit. Sure, fine, whatever. He turned to his email to see if he could glean any information from it. This was only getting worse. He didn't even know what cases were being referred to in the messages he was receiving. Maybe this was some elaborate practical joke, no too elaborate and Scully would never injure him for the sake of a joke. He couldn't be asleep, not with the ache he still felt in his groin. Okay, keep your mouth shut and try to figure this out. As he read on he found himself becoming fascinated by the information he was looking at. These cases had been sanctioned? He was startled out of the file he was studying when Diana stretched and rose from her chair. He'd forgotten she was there. "Lunch?" She turned to look at him. "Is it that time already?" He glanced down at his watch. "Uh, no, I'm caught up in this, I may grab something later." She shrugged and left, he could still feel her irritation with him but he didn't really care. As soon as he heard the elevator close he was on his feet and pulling open the files. It wasn't there; there was no file with Scully's name on it. Someone had taken it, but why? Samantha's was still there, but as he continued looking he noticed several files missing from the drawer. The ones missing were the newer ones, just in the last five or so years. But there were lots of files that he'd never seen before. They didn't look new, whoever had done this had gone to a lot of trouble to make it look good. A quick survey of the remaining files showed that all mention of Scully had been removed. The new files only listed Agents Mulder and Fowley as agents of record. She'd called him partner when she entered the office this morning. He thought she was just yanking his chain, trying to get a rise from him especially after the debacle this morning. Now he wasn't so sure. In order to give himself a chance to think he wandered upstairs and found the lunch cart, snagging a sandwich to take back to his desk. He found that he had wandered close to Scully's cubicle, at least where she'd assaulted him this morning and walked past to see if she were there. She was, her back to the entrance, eating her own lunch at the desk. He wanted to speak, to get her take on what the hell was happening. No, now wasn't the time and face it, one 'nad smashing a day was his limit. He'd try to get more information on his own, then bring the evidence to her, but not here and not now. Reluctantly he returned to his own office and continued his solitary investigation. ***** He'd debated with himself long enough. He needed to talk to Scully and he needed it to be private. Get out of the damn car and go knock on her door, the worse thing she can do is not let you in. Or maybe knee you in the balls again, either way you have to try. The knock was followed by a lengthy wait; she'd looked through her peephole and seen who was there. He was sure of that. Did she have company? He knew her car was here, but she could be out on a date or . . . The door opened and an obviously annoyed Agent Scully stood before him. "How the hell do you know where I live and how dare you come over here uninvited?" Cold as ice, her nickname was certainly well deserved now. "Could I talk to you for just a minute? Please." "There are plenty of other women you could be pestering right now, because if you came here to get laid " "Geez, Scully! That's not . . . can I just talk to you for few minutes. I'm not here to hurt you, I swear." Her eyes narrowed and he knew his entry was a flip of the coin right now. He kept his expression bland, any entreaty on his part would seem like a come on to her. Finally she sighed and stepped aside to allow him entrance. "Have a seat." She gestured toward the couch. He gratefully sank into his seat, not exactly sure where to start. "Well?" She was giving no quarter, having taken the chair farthest from him. He knew she never sat there, this was only to put distance between them. He took a deep breath. "Scully, how do you know me?" "I don't know you, except by reputation." Short, clipped, this was probably going to be a very short conversation. "Yeah, 'Spooky' Mulder, chasing little green men?" She waved her hand to dismiss that, "I was actually speaking of your reputation among the women at the Bureau." "I have a reputation with women?" He was silent for a minute. "Me?" "If this is some sort of weird come on, it's not going to work." She said dryly. "No, no. Look, I came here to ask you a few questions. Please?" He did look earnest about whatever he was here about. And she was a little curious, men like Fox Mulder didn't often have the nerve to do something like this around her. Finally she nodded. "Go ahead and ask." He looked her in the eye, she'd never noticed his eyes before, they were attractive. She'd always been too busy dismissing his body and the way he enjoyed displaying it to the females downtown. His words however, brought her back to attention. "Do you have any memory of ever being my partner?" "What? Do I . . . is this some kind of sick joke? Did someone put you up to this?" She was rising from her seat, he knew his next move would be out the door. "No, Scully this is not a joke. I'm lost and, shit. I'm sorry I bothered you." Now he rose from his seat, his defeat evident in his posture. Despite her distrust, this didn't look faked. "Agent Mulder, what are you talking about?" He certainly looked lost. In spite of everything she'd heard about this man she was intrigued. He was either a damn good actor or he really was upset about this. "Sit back down Agent Mulder. I need a little explanation about that question. Would you like something to drink?" That surprised even her, she certainly hadn't planned for him to be here that long. He looked up at her, his gratitude evident in his face. "Do you have any ice tea?" Ice tea? Fox Mulder asking for ice tea? Well, she had heard that over the last couple of weeks he hadn't been seen out drinking or even hitting on the female personnel. This visit only added to the strangeness. She returned shortly with two tall glasses of ice tea and handed him one. She couldn't resist, "Not exactly the beverage I would have expected you to request." "Is that my reputation now too?" Now? What did he mean? He saw the confusion on her face. "Nevermind." "Go ahead with your questions Agent Mulder." "Could you call me just Mulder, please?" She nodded. "I guess this all started a couple of weeks ago, that day I followed you into your cubicle and you . . . " She nodded. "I apologize for grabbing you that day, I would never . . . " He ran his hand through his hair not sure how to get into this story. The man was sexy, the tousled hair didn't hurt any at all. She forced her attention back to the business at hand. This must be how he did it, looking so damn vulnerable. "Everything went to hell that day, Scully. I woke up at my normal time, had a bite to eat, drove to work and came upstairs. I spotted you lugging that huge pile of papers and went over to see what you had and if I could help. And you . . . you didn't want to have anything to do with me. I couldn't for the life of me figure out how I had made you so angry, then Diana shows up in our office and " "Our office?" "Scully you were my partner when I left work the day before. We'd been partners for nearly six years. I have a photographic memory." She nodded, she'd heard about it. He was phenomenal when he was hot on a case, remembering every detail of every case with even a hint of similarity. "I have a memory of six years with you as your partner, working with you, coming over here and sharing pizza working at this very table. You've been to my apartment a thousand times. We were close, Scully. I . . ." He looked up into her eyes. "Not like that, we never, we were friends Scully. Best friends, you knew everything about me and I knew everything about you. We solved cases the Bureau didn't even want solved. We were damn good together and now I seem to be the only one that even remembers that it ever happened." She spoke softly; he seemed sincere, but . . . "Is this how you do it? Is this how you get all the women in your bed?" He suddenly looked tired, "No and I don't remember getting any women into my bed. I've waited for you for six years instead." Was he kidding? What kind of a comment was that? He was smooth anyway, she had to give him that. "You've been partnered with Diana Fowley for years. You two had a thing going for a long time I heard, after that you started playing the field, but you stayed partners. I always wondered how that worked out, how you managed to remain friends." "My memory doesn't include us being friends. She tried to come between the two of us and . . . You think I'm crazy don't you?" "I honestly don't know what to think. I know that you and Diana have the same ideas about what you do, the cases you take." He gave an unamused chuckle, "You know I always thought if you'd only agree with me a little more things would be easier. Having someone who never questions me is worse. I don't feel like I have to work for it anymore. I'm not as good. I have a very vivid memory of telling you that you kept me honest, made me a whole person. I'm not that now, not without . . . You don't remember any of this. I'm sorry I bothered you." He rose from the couch. "Thank you for the tea." Should she stop him? He wasn't making sense, but he hadn't made any untoward moves. He truly seemed lost. Alone. She rose also, "I'm sorry Mulder. I wish I could help you, but I don't . . . " "It's okay. Thanks for not calling the cops and having me hauled out of here. I'll see you around the office." "Mulder, what kind of disagreement are you looking for about your cases?" He had his hand on the doorknob now. She almost smiled at the look of eagerness that lit his eyes. "I need the scientific slant. What if there is a mundane solution. That's not going to come to me automatically, I reach for extreme possibilities. I need someone to bring me down to earth, make me prove my theory. I don't need everything handed to me, if I can't prove it, then maybe I'm wrong." "Diana doesn't do that?" "She's more out there than I am." He snorted, "I don't remember her being that like when we were together." He caught her look, "I mean the way I remember things. Some of the work we've done that I've checked on since this happened is downright sloppy. I can't believe it passed the AD. Unless . . ." "What?" He'd gone far away suddenly. "Unless that's what they want. Let us do a half-assed job, let everyone who knows about the X-Files have a good laugh. We'd be less expensive that way and they'd have shut me up by letting me think I was " "That sounds rather paranoid, Mulder." He grinned at her. "That's the first thing anyone's said to me in weeks that sounded familiar." She couldn't help responding to his smile. He was a damn attractive man. "Look, if you really need someone to give a hard look at something about one of your cases, why don't you email me the details. I'll look it over and see if I can help." "Are you serious?" He reached for her hand and stopped himself before he could touch her. "Sorry, I used to . . . sorry." He might look like one, but he certainly didn't act like a lady-killer. He acted like a geek, kind of, and he seemed shy. This did not seem like the man she'd heard all the stories about. Maybe he was different when he drank. But he hadn't tonight, not a drop except the tea and she was sure he'd been sober when he knocked on her door. ***** She felt more energized than she had in years. She wasn't letting these new cases interfere with her 'real' work, but the stuff Mulder was bringing her, the debates with him, made her feel alive. She hadn't realized that she was beginning to just go through the motions, now even her regular work was benefiting from this sideline. She had to admit she was a little miffed at his continued insistence that her involvement be kept completely confidential. She was beginning to get used to his paranoia and even teased him about it on occasion, but she had not been able to budge him on this one issue. She was in the ladies room reapplying her lipstick when the door opened. The two women that entered didn't bother to see if anyone else was in the room. "I swear he's going to have a heart attack if he doesn't calm down and I'm ready to help it along. It is illegal to push your boss out the window, right?" "Yes, especially one of the windows here. They might catch you, unless you leave evidence of course." The other woman snorted. She had as much respect for the abilities of management as the rest of the staff. "What's wrong with him today?" "Oh, it's those damn 'X-Files'. Ever since Mulder sobered up apparently he's turning in work that they can't dismiss anymore. You know how they used to get together and laugh, well they ain't laughing anymore and they're beginning to get angry. No one expected him to do this kind of work, he never has before." "I thought Diana was supposed to keep him off track." "Me too. But now he seems to be keeping it in his pants and staying sober. The female staff are devastated, but not as much as the fifth floor." "Come to think of it, I haven't heard of him seeing anyone lately. You don't suppose there really is anything to those old files? I thought it was just sop because of his father's position in the state department." "Oh no, he's bright, top of his class at the academy. You know, it's almost as though they were afraid of him. I imagine that's why he was paired with Diana. I know they used to use to her thwart investigations they didn't want . . . well, you know." For the first time the women realized they might not be alone. Scully had already moved into one of the stalls, not closing the door, but staying back out of sight. "I don't see anyone. We better get back to the desks. He'll explode if he needs a paperclip and I'm not there to disentangle one for him. You know, I hope Mulder does uncover whatever they're so upset about. I'd rather work for him, even sober, than the old man." The two women left the room, still gossiping. Scully allowed herself to slide down onto the seat and try to gather her thoughts. Maybe Mulder wasn't so paranoid after all. And just because you're paranoid, doesn't mean they're not out to get you. She waited a good five minutes before emerging from the ladies room and even then found her hands were shaking when she pulled up her email. Was it safe to send him an email? Were they watching them both now? Or had her involvement escaped notice so far? Damn, she felt as paranoid as he always seemed. She quickly disengaged the signature from the bottom of her email and sent Mulder a quick note to meet her at her apartment at noon. She pretended to work, moving around papers until she felt she could slip out in the lunch crowd without being noticed. He was waiting outside her door when she arrived. "I always wanted to be invited over here for a nooner Scully." He leered at her. "Were you followed?" She ignored his comment and he straightened up from where he'd been leaning against the doorframe. She was frightened. "Scully? Are you okay?" She had the door opened now and rushed him inside, closing and locking the door behind them. She then went to the window and proceeded to view the street. He watched with growing concern and finally approached her. She jumped when he put his hand on her arm. He immediately released her and stepped back. "No, it's okay, Mulder. I just, I overheard . . . " "What? Does anyone know about you working with me?" "No, no I don't think so. But I think maybe you were right." She proceeded to relate what she had overheard in the ladies room to him. She watched his face go carefully blank to hide what he was feeling. "Mulder?" She didn't remember sitting on the couch, but that's where they were and she was now holding his hand. She could practically hear the thoughts racing through his brain. "Well, now we know why the sloppy work was tolerated so well." He tried to make his voice light, but she already knew him better than that. It felt like she'd always known him. She could already input his half of their debates without much trouble. She said nothing, just allowing him to fondle her hand and think his own thoughts for a moment. "I think I should revert to my old ways for a while, Scully. Reassure the powers that be that good 'ole Spooky Mulder is no threat to them." "Yeah," she said softly, "and the women at the Bureau have missed you a lot." "Not that!" His hand tightened over hers, "The drinking Scully, I was talking about the drinking. The other, that was never me in the first place. I don't want . . . Scully, I don't want anyone else. But I can't let anyone know how I feel about . . . you wouldn't be safe." She absorbed this in silence, the relief she didn't want to admit making her positively weak. "Mulder, I think maybe you better tell me a little more about the relationship you and I were supposed to have that I don't remember." He nodded. A few weeks ago she wouldn't even have considered listening to this. His influence was again leading her to the dark side and he smiled grimly. "I'm not sure how much of this you want to hear." "All of it. Everything you remember." "But the memories can't be real Scully. My father's still alive, you were never missing those months from your life. You've never heard of Duane Barry. It's all false and couldn't have happened." "Unless this isn't real." She countered and without thinking he drew her to him. When she didn't protest he held her even tighter. "Its real enough Scully. And I'm putting you in danger again. I should have known better than to involve you. That's just the kind of selfish bastard I am. I want you in my life so much that I . . . I better get out of here." "No!" Now her arms tightened around him. "Why are you so sure I'd be in danger?" "Experience. Scully because of your relationship with me you were abducted and returned to me in a coma after being away for months. Your mother had life support removed, that's how close I came to losing you. Then you found an implant in your neck and the removal of it caused you to develop inoperable cancer." Her eyes were wide, he'd been through all of this with her? "Another implant caused the cancer to go into remission. These people who don't want me to expose them always go for where it hurts the most. For me, that's you. Scully," He was fondling her hand again and wouldn't look her in the eye. "In my reality your abduction, the tests they performed on you, caused you to be sterile. You can't have children. I don't want any of that for you. I should never have gotten close to you. You're much better off without me. At least this time they don't know about you. I'm going to keep it that way. Thanks for the help you've given me, but this is it. Don't contact me, it's over." He dropped her hand and rose from his seat. "The hell it is, Mulder!" She was on her feet too, eyes flashing with fury. He drew back, not the reaction he was expecting. "If you think you can dump me like last week's bimbo, you're not a bright as I thought." "I'm, I'm not dumping you. I'm trying to protect you." "You don't think I'm capable of that Agent Mulder?" "Not against these people Scully. If they find out why my work has become respectable the players in this reality might not cut us the slack they did in the other one they might just kill you outright and I can't handle that." "What if we took more precautions, they don't know about me." "Not good enough and we can't ever be sure. The work isn't worth it, it isn't worth you." She had no answer to that. She watched his eyes as he took her face in his hands. He was going to kiss her. He hadn't made any moves toward her before. To her surprise and, she realized, dismay, he tilted her head and pressed his lips against her forehead. Then he was gone, slipping out the door before she could collect herself enough to react. He was leaving her, getting out of her life to protect her. No! She didn't want him out of her life. Oh good lord, she was falling in love with him. Hell, had fallen in love with him. He couldn't just vanish from her life. What could she do now? ***** She was watching for him when he came in the building the next morning. He looked like shit and was obviously hung over. She didn't approach him and he refused to acknowledge her. Scully watched knowing nods and comments trail him to the elevator and several secretaries actually preened as though congratulating themselves that Fox might be back on track. She felt a nearly overwhelming urge to scratch some eyes out. She stalked to her cubicle and attempted to shut this out of her mind. She was totally unsuccessful and finally admitted that after a couple of hours. He could kill himself drinking like that, especially now that he wasn't used to it. She stood up in her cubicle and grabbed her briefcase, actually kicking her trashcan on the way out. That caused several people to turn and look at her, but the expression on her face froze all comments. ***** He trudged toward his door. He'd only had a couple of beers tonight; last night had done him in. He'd have to get back in practice or at least learn to pretend to drink better. Oh, who gave a rat's ass? Certainly not him. He opened the door, kicking the newspaper inside but not bothering to pick it up. "You're late." His hand automatically drew his gun without conscious thought before he realized it was her. "What the fuck are you doing here! I thought I made myself clear." "Oh you were clear enough, Agent. I just don't happen to agree, so tonight you hear my side." "What if someone saw you come in here? How did you get here?" "The metro and then a taxi. I was careful Mulder." "You don't get it, you don't know what danger you're in!" She ignored that comment. She hadn't bothered to rise from the couch and now he loomed over her. "Get out of my apartment." "The way I see it," she spoke as thought he hadn't, "we're destined to be together. In your reality we built up a relationship, friendship, whatever you want to call it over time growing closer, counting on each other. In this reality it's taken a lot less time but I feel closer to you than anyone else I know, anyone else I want to know. Maybe you think you can walk away from that I can't." "You don't have a choice." His voice was low. He pulled her to her feet and his hands now gripped her shoulders as though he would physically throw her out. Her hands were flat on his chest, but not pushing him away. He realized he was focusing on her lips, bending down toward them and they most amazing thing was that she was moving toward him as well. When their lips met he felt a surge of energy like he'd never even imagined possible. He had her pressed up against him now and felt her mold herself to his body, her arms wrapped as tightly around him. When they separated slightly for a breath. "I think you're right about one thing Mulder. We don't have a choice." He just looked at her, absorbing her words. Then she had control of his lips again. "Scully. Scully, I can't . . . " "Yes Mulder, you can. I'm not leaving here." The anguish on his face almost changed her mind. He was that frightened for her? "Mulder, together we can " "Together is how we're most vulnerable. I should never have kissed you." "Why not?" "Because I don't think I can stop." That caused a smile to begin to form on her face. "What did you mean you weren't leaving here?" She could feel her face heat up at his regard. "I meant we needed to discuss this more thoroughly. You needed to hear my side. I didn't . . . I wasn't . . . " Mulder was just staring at her. "Say something." She thought for a moment that he was going to cry. Instead he took a deep breath, "I don't know if I can be strong enough to push you away. Maybe I should wish to be switched back to my own dimension and not have to deal with this. That Scully wouldn't want to get this close to me after everything I've done to her life and your real Mulder wouldn't be a danger to you." "And neither of us would be as fulfilled or happy?" "I was happy with the other Scully." Her eyebrow rose. "Okay, as happy as I could be under the circumstances. Damn it Scully!" He drew her to him again. "You'll ruin everything if you care about me." "Then everything's already ruined." She stated simply, enjoying the feel of him around her. "I want to stay here tonight." He drew back at that, gaping at her. "Is the idea that repugnant?" She finally asked, embarrassment beginning to grow at his continued silence. "You want to stay here? With me? Scully, I'm not sure what that means." She swallowed, this was so far outside her normal way of life. But her life had been upside down since this man had come to her and asked for her help. He'd made her a whole person, made her work exciting again, and now had made her want him as a man. She straightened her spine, she might as well jump in with both feet. "I want to make love with you." For an instant she thought he would bolt and run. She could feel her self-confidence develop a leak and start to deflate rapidly. "Scully." She could barely hear him. "Don't let me be dreaming. Please don't let this be a dream." "It's not Mulder." She said gently. Her hand was again on his chest, this time pushing him down on his couch. "You willing to listen to me now?" At his nod she sat beside him. "I'll be careful, and you can do your drunk act. But look at things Mulder, in both realities we end up together. Bow to the inevitable and let's learn caution from what we know. Don't push me away Mulder, we need each other." He closed his eyes, as much to block the sight of her as anything. No choice. If he hadn't approached her, gotten her help, would they still have found each other somehow? It was certainly beginning to feel like it. She sat silently waiting for him to come to the same conclusion she had. He was fighting it more, but she wasn't willing to lose this battle. There was something inevitable about all of this. They belonged together cosmically. She wanted to laugh at herself, she didn't believe that kind of thing, except . . . nevermind, she'd study that phenomena in her spare time. Right now? Right now she was with Mulder. Enough said. She pulled him down as she reclined on the couch, enjoying the weight of him on her body. When she became aware that her blouse was untucked and several buttons unbuttoned she moved under him until she was at his ear. "Do you have any protection?" "What?" "There's no indication in this reality that I'm sterile." His face sobered immediately. "Oh god, I hadn't . . . I don't even know my own sexual history." "Then we should use caution, we should probably both be tested. But not tonight. Tonight I don't want to be practical or even sensible. I want to be with you." He closed his eyes. This was a mistake, but how could it be? This was Scully and she wanted him. He almost felt sorry for that other Mulder trapped on the other side. Then she had his lower lip between her teeth and the higher functions of his brain shut down. Lack of blood flow no doubt. He was positively aching for her. It had been so damn long. She was thinking the same thing as he ground himself into her. She hoped she could remember how to do it, but she was pretty sure he knew. In fact she was willing to put money on it now that he had her blouse open, biting tenderly on her nipples through the lace. Then that barrier was gone and he was laving her breasts with his tongue. She was whimpering; it wasn't enough. She wanted, no she needed, more of him. He understood, since he felt the same and raised his head to kiss her lips again before rising to remove his tie and shirt. He had a beautiful body. She couldn't keep her hands from it, smiling slightly at his hiss when her fingers brushed his nipples. She trailed her fingers down his chest slowly as he tried to remember the art of breathing. When her hand reached his waistband he grabbed it. "Scully, it's not too late." "Mulder, it was too late the moment we were born." Since there was no response to that he let go of her hand. She unbuckled his belt and pulled it slowly from the loops. He knew then that his control was gone, given completely to her. She unbuttoned his slacks and carefully lowered his zipper, a task made more dangerous by the second. He stood to allow her to lower his slacks and boxers to the floor. What he didn't expect was her luscious lips closing around him. He had to grasp her shoulder and the back of the couch to remain upright. "Scu " "Just relax Mulder." He wanted to close his eyes, to concentrate fully on the sensation, but he needed just as much to watch her, to see Scully do this with him. The hand on her shoulder moved down taking her breast in his caress. Her lips tightened as she took as much of him in her mouth as she could. He tried not to thrust into her mouth as she alternately sucked and tortured him with her tongue. Her hands were now fondling his balls and he knew if he didn't put a stop to this and now, it would be too late. He gathered his strength and retreated from her. "No, no Scully." "It's okay. I want to." He shook his head and drew her to her feet. "I want in on this." His hands under her arms lifted her to stand on the couch, where she clutched his shoulders as he lowered her slacks. When his hands grazed the elastic on her panties he looked up at her. She nodded at him but still he hesitated. "Mulder?" He laid his head gently against her stomach. "Oh Scully." She placed her hands over his and helped him lower the damp silk. He pulled her against him, burying his face between her breasts, then taking turns kissing them, nuzzling them. "Mulder, I think we need to find a bed." He nodded in complete agreement, knowing he'd burst if he didn't do this soon. He lifted her into his arms and carried her into his bedroom, laying her gently on his bed. He started to pull back from her and she grabbed him. "Please." "The protection." She nodded with her eyes and he moved to his dresser. When he returned she reached for it. "Let me." "Not yet." "Yes Mulder. We can play later; right now I need you. I need to feel you in me." He drank in her eyes, quenching his soul for the first time ever. He allowed her control again and shuddered as she sheathed him, twitching in her hands. She pulled him to her, over her, taking over his mouth, dueling with his tongue as he took in the taste of him in her mouth. She had hold of him again as he nipped at her breasts and moved down, forcing her to release him as he sucked at her navel. "Mulder." She was pleading with him now; she wanted him so much she would beg? Oh god. He came back to retake her lips and she began guiding him where she longed for him to be. She brushed him through her curls as she stimulated her own juices with him. His size unnerved her, but at the same time she knew he would never hurt her. She brushed that bundle of nerves again and his fingers joined the fun. Now Mulder, damn it or she'd die from sheer anticipation! He sensed her need matched his own and slowly began entering her. She tensed for a second, then released herself to him. Whatever he wanted was his. She arched to bring him deeper, wrapping her legs around his waist. "Oh Scully." His last coherent words as he began to move slowly in her. She had been created for this, for him. He couldn't imagine ever leaving her body. It was where he belonged. Long swift strokes bringing him deeper each time, burying himself in her, never to be unearthed again. With a gasp she was coming, convulsing under him, around him, throughout him. He lost all senses except where she existed, thrusting once, twice and then joining her in whatever galaxy she had led him to. Knowing that she would understand his cries though the rest of the world never would. He lay spent watching her leaning over him, her fingers trailing through his chest hair. She looked up at him. "What?" "Ice Queen?" She blushed slightly. "Now that you know I'll have to kill you." "I think you already did." "Oh I don't know. Part of you seems to be resurrecting itself fairly rapidly." "You're kidding, right?" "Oh, I'll give you a little time to reload, but not long." He just stared at her, wide-eyed. Scully? She stayed the night; her excuse was that it was better not to be seen coming and going too much. Yeah, sure, whatever. Just as long as she was here with him. ***** What the hell was he doing in Viola, Idaho with Diana? He wanted to be home with Scully. Dangerous thinking, but honest. This was no X-File, Diana had found it. No doubt it was sanctioned to get him out of town and away from any real investigating he could do. Diana slipped into the chair beside him, back from the ladies room. "Fox, you really should try to be a little more diplomatic with local law enforcement. We do need their help. Cordiality wouldn't hurt either." He almost yelped as her hand wrapped around his thigh and squeezed. "Damn it Diana. Stop that." He pulled her hand from his leg and literally threw it down on the table in front of them. The look on her face was anything but friendly. He was acting so differently. Her superiors were furious and she had to find out what had happened. He moved his chair farther from her and finished his meal in silence. He rose as soon as she finished her last bite. "Let's get back to the motel, I want to go for a run." I need to, is what he should say. His body had reverted to being seventeen and hormone overloaded again just being with Scully. The run would be better than a cold shower. He returned to the room following his run much more centered and relaxed. It wasn't as good as being with Scully, but since that wasn't an option . . . He was half way across the room, headed toward his bathroom when he heard her. "Fox? I don't mind sweaty men. Come here." She was on his bed, Diana, lying there nude. "What the hell are you doing in here? How did you get in?" He knew he'd made sure the connecting door was locked on his side. "Come on Fox. It's seen a long time for both of us. We used to be very good at this." He was standing there looking at her, appalled. What had he ever seen in her? His body felt no hint of arousal. She was watching him, becoming more and more uncomfortable. What was going on, he'd always been turned on by nudity. Now, now it looked as though he loathed her. She quickly drew her robe up to her and slipped it on. "Fox," He almost corrected her. Mulder, he went by Mulder, but then he realized that's what Scully called him. He didn't even want to hear the word from her lips. "What is it? We've been together for years, we're partners. What's going on?" "I grew up, Diana. I couldn't stay that immature forever and I grew up to everyone's apparent dismay. Get out of my room." "You don't mean that." "Believe me, I mean it." He held the door open for her and stood by it as she walked out. He threw the bolt at the top and checked the connecting door again. Never again! If he ever had to travel with her again they would not have connecting rooms. He headed for the shower, feeling dirtier than he had when he'd first returned from his run. He came back in the room with a towel around him, drying his hair. God, he wanted to talk to Scully. But it wasn't safe. He couldn't contact her when he was out of town. If something like that were traced they'd be on her in a minute. Damn! He stretched out on the bed after pulling the spread off and tossing it to the other side of the room. He didn't even want to lie where she'd been. How many years had she been betraying him? Going behind his back to make certain that his investigations were meaningless. Well, the other Mulder's investigations, but he was here now. He'd never trust her again. The next morning he knocked on her door, dressed and ready. "I just wanted you to know I'm headed back for Washington. There's no X-File here. I'm packed and the car's loaded. Do you want to go or ride to the airport with me to bring the car back?" "Fox? What are you talking about? There's possible abductions going on here. We need to " "Nothing is going on here beyond possibly a high school hoax. There's no evidence of a real abduction and I have work to do in DC." "Fox." She reached out to place her hand on his arm and he drew back. Her eyes grew icy, "Fine. It'll take me a few minutes to pack and we can fly back together. Do you want to call the sheriff or shall I?" "I already have, to let him know I was leaving. If you want to let him know you are as well, fine. I'll wait in the car." He turned and walked away from her without another word. She seethed in the doorway for a moment, then slammed the door and went to pack. Her superiors were going to go ballistic. She was supposed to keep him out of town for several days. What was going on with him? He was sober and as far as she could find out not seeing anyone. That made no sense. He'd never gone this long without a woman and she was willing to bet without a drink as well. Fine, if he didn't want to work on her investigations, she'd make him hers. Something drastic had changed and she had to get to the bottom of it. He was becoming too dangerous to keep around. She made two phone calls before joining him in the car. She hadn't been completely honest about why they were returning early. She had to protect herself. She also wanted more freedom of movement to find out what was happening. After a couple of days she was fairly certain if he was seeing anyone she didn't work at the Bureau. He was being such a good boy. Mildly flirting with almost every woman but no sparks with any of them. He was going home every night, unless he was drinking there, and that didn't seem likely. He'd never wanted to be alone, hence the bar and the women. After they had drifted apart he'd always played the field, which was fine with her. He wasn't tied to anyone and they had remained partners and available to each other. Now, after the fiasco in Idaho she was positively embarrassed to be around him. A feeling that was very foreign to her. He'd pay for it. No one treated her this way. ***** He couldn't wait to get home. She should already be there waiting for him. It almost made ignoring her in public worth it, especially since he did it visualizing her nude. He was all but whistling as he approached his door. He let himself in. She hadn't started dinner yet; good he wanted to help. Well, actually he wanted to watch her. It was so domestic. Who would have thought that could be erotic. He tossed his keys on the table and headed for the living room loosening his tie. He stopped dead still at the entrance, all movement frozen. Scully was there, in a chokehold, being held tightly by Diana. Diana's weapon pressed firmly into her side. "Look what I found in your apartment Fox. You know, she even had a key." "What are you doing here Diana?" This was bad, this was incredibly bad. He had to get Diana talking. "You sure I'm the one you should be asking Fox?" While he searched for an answer she continued, "I think I've figured out what's going on here. Somehow this icy little bitch caught your eye. I didn't know you liked 'hard to get' Fox. You should have said something. The problem is, I think you've gotten her involved in our work. That explains what you've been doing. You could get us both killed like this lover. We had a great gig going, we were together when we wanted, you got to be involved in the work you're so good at. Okay, you were often off track, but you were enjoying yourself." Enjoying yourself? He'd been drinking himself into a stupor every night and hopping from bed to bed. Enjoying himself? "Let her go Diana. She doesn't know anything about our work." "I'd like to believe that, but I can't. There's a lot of women I could believe it about, but not this one. Being with her changed you." Her grip tightened around Scully's neck and he made an involuntary move toward her. "See Fox? You care about her. A fatal mistake, you would have remained better off with me. No strings, good sex, you blew it Fox." But he wasn't looking at her any more. He was watching Scully's eyes. She loved him; Scully loved him and would follow him no matter which way he wanted to handle this. Diana felt her chest tighten. They were communicating! Even now while she held a gun to the woman they were communicating. Damn them both. "Enough! Fox, I'm doing this for you. It's the only way I know to save you." The explosion from her gun paralyzed him for a millisecond, then he watched Scully crumple in slow motion to the floor. "No!" The word was ripped from him and he leapt at Diana. He couldn't let her get a second shot at Scully. The older woman was strong, and she was well trained. They grappled for the gun and Mulder jerked violently as it went off again, waiting for the pain. It didn't come and finally he looked in Diana's face. She was so stunned. He saw her lips form the word "Fox" as she sank toward the floor. Mulder stepped back, letting her fall and turned to Scully. A pulse, there was a pulse. He jerked the phone off the table and demanded help for Scully. He left her side long enough to find a towel and after ripping her blouse open and away from the wound, pressed it to her side to staunch the bleeding. "Scully listen to me. Help is on the way. You have to hang on, Scully, please. You've got to hear me." His free hand was caressing her face, willing her to respond to him. Then the paramedics and the police were all over the place. The police took him aside and though he answered their questions his eyes never left her. He barely spared a glance when they covered Diana with a sheet though he heard them call for a second ambulance to transport her body. "Look, I don't know what set her off. When I got here both women were already here. Agent Fowley was holding a gun on Agent Scully. She was talking out of her head. After she shot Scully, I struggled with her, the gun went off. Now I have to go to the hospital." "We have a few more questions." "Fine. You know where you can find me. Check out your forensics and then get back to me." He walked out the door and was already at a run before slamming out into the night. He raced to the hospital and burst into the ER. "An Agent Scully was brought here. I need to know where she is." "Uh, yes sir. Dr. Brody was with her. Just a second." She left the desk and he stood there, trying to keep his hands from shaking. Where the hell was she? "Excuse me, are you here about Agent Scully>' He turned instantly. "Yes. How is she?" "And you are?" "Agent Mulder." He had his ID out. "Please, how is she?" "I'm sorry Agent Mulder. We couldn't . . . the bullet did too much damage. Agent Mulder?" He was staring at the doctor. The words didn't make sense. Where was Scully? Why were they keeping him from her? He pushed past the doctor. He had to find her. "Agent Mulder, please." He wasn't able to stop him. A nurse came out from behind the desk. "Should I call security?" "Maybe you better." He followed Mulder who was now checking the third cubicle as he moved down the hall. "Scully?" He sounded breathless. Then he was beside her, taking her hand. Oh god, she was cold. She shouldn't be so cold. He was massaging her hand trying to warm her, not speaking. Not even sure that he could. "Agent Mulder, is there anyone I can call for you?" "She's not dead. She can't be." He shook the doctor's hand off his arm. "She can't be!" He turned back to her as two security personnel entered the area. The doctor motioned them back. "She can't be." It was getting dark, as though he had entered a tunnel, one from which he would never emerge. ***** Where was he? It was cold. Then memory hit him like a sledgehammer. Scully. Scully was dead. Why was he still alive? Why hadn't Diana killed him as well? He heard a door open but grief held him immobile, not even bothering to open his eyes. It didn't matter, nothing mattered now. "What happened to you? Oh god Mulder, why did you change? The drinking, the women. Were you trying to get killed? Did you just give up? What am I supposed to do now? How do I live?" He'd thought he was dreaming her voice. What? He opened his eyes to see the red and swollen eyes of Dana Scully, tears glistening on her face. She jerked back, her eyes impossibly wide. Her mouth moved but no sound emerged. "Scully? You're alive?" That forced air back into her lungs. "Me? Mulder what the hell is . . . you were . . . you were . . ." And she sank toward the floor. "Scully!" He was off the table, just beginning to realize his nudity. When he ensured himself that she had only fainted he draped the sheet that had covered him around himself and thought to look around. A morgue? He was in a morgue and she had thought he was dead. Was he back? Was he back to where Scully was alive? They had a lot to talk about, he wondered if she would listen to him this time. And, he smiled, how long it would take to get her back into his bed.