TITLE: HEALING OPHELIA AUTHOR: DONNILEE mailto:donnilee@juno.com RATING: NC-17/XXX-(And I don't mean X-File). Part 1, 2 = R Part 3-6 = NC-17 Part 7 = PG-13 Part 8 = NC-17 WARNING: Smut-fest extraordinaire. Grab your air tanks and breathing apparatus. We are diving deep into my warped world of erotic fantasy. Lots of extremely graphic, descriptive sex and bad language. If you like this stuff, you will call it erotica, if you don't, you'll call it porn. NO PRUDES HERE - AND PLEASE, NO ONE UNDER 17. My motto; if you don't like the show, change the channel; if you don't like the program, change the station; and if you don't like erotica - DON'T READ THIS. CATEGORY: MSR ROMANCE/ANGST POSTING: ANYWHERE - But, please make sure my name and e-mail address is on it and inform me by e-mail of the location. Thank you. SPOILERS: Not really, maybe a tiny one about Mulder's parents, and Scully's abduction. SUMMARY: Mulder and Scully do a tentative two-step around their feelings for each other and finally resolve the issue - in bed, naturally. DISCLAIMER: Ho Hum - Well, none of the characters mentioned here belong to me. If they did, M/S would have been doing the horizontal mambo a long time ago, complete with all the angst and complications. No, unfortunately, they belong to surfer boy, Chris Carter and the folks at Ten Thirteen Productions. No copyright infringement intended. Healing Ophelia PART 1: (RATED R) I'd finally taken the vacation everyone had been telling me I needed. Rather than go away to some island or something, by myself, I decided to go and spend some quality time with my mom. I was going to spend the first week with her and then decide what to do with the second week. He called me every day that I was gone. I almost expected him to. He didn't call the first night I was gone and I kicked myself for feeling disappointed. What the hell was wrong with me anyway? I couldn't go one day without talking to him? Pathetic. After all, we were just friends. However, he'd become a habit for me. A comfortable one. It was weird that he wasn't with me. He called the next day, and we chatted. I could tell something was bothering him but he wasn't talking. Now, I'm standing in the hallway at work, outside the cracked open door to A.D. Skinner's secretary's office. I can't see him but I know he's sitting there. I can see A.D. Skinner's secretary, Janey. She is smiling coquettishly at him and it bothers the shit out of me. What the hell am I doing here? I'm on vacation. I know what I'm doing here. I had to see him and I couldn't wait until tonight. He's obviously been summoned and is waiting, never a good sign. I hear Janey clear her throat. "So, Fox, when is your partner coming back? Do you need a dinner partner?" "Mulder." "Huh?" He repeats himself slowly, as if talking to a child and I smile. "Mul..der. Call me Mul..der. No one calls me by my first name. Only my mother, and I didn't like it when she did it either, but she was my mother." Janey shrinks back in her chair and I can see she is chagrined at having made a mistake. She obviously likes him and is attracted to him and now she's gone too far and tried to be too personal. She tries again. "I'm sorry, Agent Mulder", she stresses his title and name. "I didn't know it was that sensitive of a subject and I won't presume to be so familiar in the future." Her speech is clipped and her frustration, showing as anger, comes through even though she is trying to hide it behind her professionalism now. I hear his voice from the other side of the room. "No, I'm sorry Janey, I shouldn't be pissy with you. I'm just in a bad mood. But I meant what I said. Call me Mulder, but you can lose the Agent business. Just call me Mulder, please." He had completely ignored her 'dinner partner' comment. She sighs. "O.K., Mulder, why are you in a bad mood?" "I don't really want to discuss it right now. Nothing personal." "I think it is personal," she says. "What?" "I said I think it is personal. I think you miss your partner dreadfully and don't want to admit it. You are always cranky when she's gone. That's what I think." "Do you now? Well, that would be none of your business now would it?" Just then the door to Skinner's office opens and he is ushered inside. I decide to go down to the office and wait. I am wearing a light summer, cotton skirt and sandals, with a loose tank top. I sit down at his desk and throw my feet up on the desk, careful not to knock any thing off onto the floor. I carefully arrange my skirt over my legs and lean my head back against the soft leather of the chair's backrest, closing my eyes. It's peaceful in here when it's quiet and no one is around. I open my eyes and choke on a laugh. There must be 50 pencils stuck in the fiberboard ceiling. Just then he comes in and stops short when he sees me. I turn my head and grin at him, casually pointing to the ceiling. He looks, shrugging sheepishly, turns and shuts the door and strolls up to the front of the desk. He's smiling. That sexy little grin that always makes my heart turn over in my chest. The grin that says, 'I'm so glad to see you.' He arches an eyebrow at my position in a silent question. "I couldn't resist the temptation anymore. I had to know what it felt like to sit on this side and not have my knees banging up against the front of the desk while I try to talk to you." He chuckles. "Well, stay there and enjoy it." He promptly grabs my chair and slides it over and plops down, tossing a file on the desk. I stick my hand out to catch it from falling off the desk as it slides across the blotter. He raises his eyebrow again and inclines his head toward the file. Just to see how he will react, I say firmly, "No, Fox." "No?" "That's right, No. N-O, Fox. I'm on vacation." "Then what are you doing here?" Good question. He didn't correct me. He didn't tell me to call him Mulder. What is that all about? What am I doing here? Before I even realize I'm having the thought, the words are coming out of my mouth. "I just stopped by to see if you wanted to have dinner with me tonight." 'Am I competing with Janey? No, I don't need to. The name thing, the dinner thing, I'm losing my cool on a regular basis. I need to know he reacts differently to me than the other women in his life. Why is that?.' He stares at me, that stare that bores into my skull, like he can see inside. He scrunches his eyebrows and looks perplexed, then purses his lips. God, I can never take my eyes off him when he purses his lips like that. I can barely hear him when he asks, "Why?" I turn to him. "Why? Because I've been gone for a week and now I'm back, and I don't feel like eating alone tonight, especially since I'm on vacation and supposed to be enjoying myself." He is silent for a moment and asks again. "Why?" I release a breath I didn't realize I was holding. Damn him for always being able to tell when I'm lying, or holding back. I take another deep breath and blurt out, "Because I missed you Mulder, and I didn't want to wait another week to see you." My voice is rising in volume in response to my embarrassment. I can't believe I said that, or the next thing that comes out of my mouth. "Is that O.K. with you? Is that a good enough excuse? I didn't know I needed one in the first place to ask my friend to dinner." 'Why am I angry? I sound petulant.' He is tipping his head to one side as if he were examining a particularly interesting piece of evidence. It's the same look. I turn away, flop my legs to the ground, stand up abruptly and head around the desk for the door. "You know what? Forget it. Just forget it." As I go to indignantly stalk out past my chair, then one he is sitting in, I am stopped short and suddenly. His arm had darted out and caught me across the top of my thighs. He is so fast, I can't even respond as his arm wraps around my legs, tilts my hips backward and sends me tumbling over the arm of the chair into his lap, ass down. My only response is a shriek of distress at loosing my balance and my control. I sit in his lap, one hand on his shoulder, the other reaching for the arm of chair to right myself. He reaches out and grabs my hand, returning it to my lap. He looks at me for a long few seconds. "What the hell, Mulder?" "Yes." The non-sequitar King strikes again. "Yes? Yes, what? What the hell is going on in that head of yours anyway?" A question I ask him frequently. He grins. "Yes, I would love to have dinner with you tonight." "Maybe I don't want to anymore." "I missed you too." "Yeah, I bet. You've probably been having a ball around here with nobody to yank on your leash." "My leash?" "You know what I mean." I am suddenly embarrassed to be sitting like this and make another attempt to sit upright and gain my feet. Both of his arms snake around my waist and haul me up closer to him. His right arm snakes down my thigh over my skirt and then tugs my calves closer to his body. I'm almost in a fetal position now. "Mulder, what the hell are you doing? Let me up." "No." "No? Why not?" I get the 'you can figure this one out, Scully' look. "O.K., I want to have dinner, I'm glad you accepted. Now can I get up?" "Not yet." "For god sakes Mulder, someone could walk in here at any minute. This wouldn't look too good. Now let me up." "In a second, and the door is locked anyway." Now it's my turn to scrunch my eyebrows into a question. Of course, he doesn't answer me. He pulls my torso into his chest, and bends his head into the crook of my neck. God help me, I can feel his hot breath on my neck and I can't stop the shiver that runs down my spine. I know he felt it. My nipples get hard as little pebbles and I hope to hell that he can't feel them through his shirt. I hear him inhaling deeply. "Mulder, what is the matter with you?!" My voice is harsh to cover my physical response. "You always smell so good, like baby powder and cinnamon." His voice is low and husky. His hot breath in my ear is causing alarming rivers of warmth to travel from my neck down my body and lodge between my legs. This is not good. This is not good at all. What the hell is happening here? This was not my intention. How did he know I used baby powder everyday in my armpits to dry my deodorant and a shampoo with cinnamon scent? He doesn't, but he knows the smells. "Thank you. I'm glad that you are happy with my hygiene, now can I get up?" Again, he doesn't answer me, he just nuzzles my neck. "Mulder, what is going on?" I am starting to panic a little now. I can barely hear him when he says, "Stop me. You can anytime you want, ya know?" I know he's right too and somehow I am frozen in place. My legs dangle over the arm of the chair, my chest is pressed up against his and I can't pull away from the feeling of his breath on my neck. "Stop me," he whispers. He's waiting for me to respond. He's giving me a chance to pull away and stop him. I take a deep breath and turn my head away from him. This only gives him more of my neck to play with, and he reaches up and runs his thumb up the column of my throat. Now I can't talk at all. I just squeak. He gently caresses my neck with his fingertips. What is he doing? Is he crazy? God, that feels good. Softly, almost under his breath, I hear him say, "God, Scully, it feels so good to hold you." 'Alright, that's it. I try to sit up straighter to regain some control. I feel his legs shift and I gasp the same time he sucks his breath through his teeth as I feel his erection, the one I didn't know he had, pressing into my bottom. I don't dare move. There is silence for about 30 seconds, neither of us moving. God my head is in the gutter. I remember last year overhearing that bitch Fowley talking to another female agent who had the hots for Mulder. There were at the sinks in the bathroom and didn't know I was in the stall. The young agent obviously knew Mulder's history with Fowley. The young, pretty blonde agent had asked a particularly crude question. 'You've been with him, tell me, what's he got? Is he as long as he is tall?' Diana had cackled out loud, amused rather than offended. Then, she said, 'well, all I'll tell you is...he's got plenty, more than plenty, actually more than you'll ever need!' They had giggled and then Diana said. 'you can probably forget it, he's stuck on that partner of his like a dog on a meat wagon.' They had laughed and left the lav. I had sat there taking a pee and wondering why talking about Mulder as an object bothered me. Or why I even cared. I knew most women thought he was incredibly good looking. So what? And stuck on me? Hardly, I exasperated the hell out of him and vice versa. Finally he leans into my ear again, interrupting my day dream and asks, "What time?" "Huh?" is all I manage to croak out. "What time for dinner?" "Oh, uh, how's 7:00?" "Perfect. Do I pick you up?" "No, just come to my apartment." He raises an eyebrow at this. "I thought you wanted to go out to dinner." "Actually, I wanted to cook you dinner." Did I? "You cook?" He looks genuinely surprised. I do my best to look offended and retort, "Of course I cook." "O.K., . . . now you can get up." His grip loosens and I hop to my feet. He doesn't even look at his lap. He doesn't acknowledge that fact that he has a very stiff hard on straining against his dress pants. He doesn't even seem bothered or embarrassed at all that I know. He has a blank look on his face. I glance at his lap and look away quickly. "I'll see you at 7:00." I quickly turn the lock on the door and leave, closing it behind me quickly without looking back. I pause in the hallway to get a grip on myself taking deep breaths. What just happened in there? He loves to tease me, that's all it was. That's when I hear a long, low, groan from the other side of the door. It sends more shivers up my spine. I should leave. Shouldn't I? I shouldn't stay here. This is the second time today I've eavesdropped. This is getting to be a habit, but I can't move. It's like somebody put crazy glue on the bottom of my shoes. I'm rooted to the spot, my hand still on the door. Then I hear him, just barely, talking to himself. "God help me, Scully, you don't have any idea what you do to me." I break out of my trance and trot quietly away from door. I don't know how to process that. What do you do after hearing something like that? You can't forget it. You can pretend you never heard it. I'll have to. And what about his arousal? Can I pretend that never happened? I sure as hell am not going to be able to forget it. I tell myself, just get home and sort this out there. I take the elevator to the basement, hop in my car and drive home on auto-pilot. I'm home now and still thinking. She left the office quickly. Showed up like an angel out of nowhere, in the middle of her vacation. I couldn't believe she was there when I walked in. I'd done nothing but think about her since she left and count the hours until I could call her again without making a pest of myself. When I saw her sitting there, I thought I might have completely gone around the bend and was having a hallucination. Her light skirt was falling between her legs and outlining them along with the 'V' at the top of her thighs. She'd called me Fox, too. Was it a slip? There was almost a challenge in her voice. I could tell she was surprised that I didn't correct her. I love to hear my name on her lips. She can call me Fox. I've never told her that because then I'd have to tell her why she is the exception to the rule. I just don't correct her when she occasionally uses my first name. If she only knew! What was I thinking when I asked her why she wanted to have dinner with me? Who cares you idiot, just accept! But something in her eyes made me ask, like there was an ulterior motive there besides simple friendship, more than a simple, 'I don't want to eat alone.' She'd freaked out and I'm not sure why and I'd almost blown it. I couldn't let her leave and I'd acted spontaneously, grabbing her like a street lecher and flipping her into my lap. She said she'd missed me. I got one whiff of her scent and was instantly getting hard. Christ, I go into a bakery and smell cinnamon and I get hard. It's such a smell I associate with her. For god sakes, you'd think I was some high school virgin with no control. Although, it has been a long time since I've had anyone to touch in any kind of intimate way. She teases me about the porn I watch or she ignores it. But it's either that or do things with people I really don't want to do things with, sooo, movies it is. I always end up fantasizing about her anyway. I forget how tiny she is. She's usually wearing jackets with shoulder pads and high heels and standing ram rod straight. With no shoes on though, I can rest my chin on top of her head with room to spare. Today, all she had on was a cotton skirt and thin tank top. I could see her bra through it. When she was in my lap, I realized just how tiny she is - short, tiny waist, thin but well toned legs. But her breasts, oh god, they ride high on her chest like a girls and are so full for her small size. It's a toss up between the breasts and the lips, which one can tie my tongue in knots faster. The eyes can do it too. When I hauled her to my chest so I could try to keep her away from my growing arousal, she felt so soft. She didn't stop me. That little squeak when I touched her neck, I thought for a second it was a physical reaction to my touching her, but it's probably wishful thinking. She was probably just freaked out. I'm good at doing that to her without even trying. But she didn't stop me either. I did notice the hardness of her nipples was showing through the tank top when she stood up. But who knows? Maybe it was cold in there. I was so hot, I wouldn't know. I know you care about me. Because I missed you Mulder... What am I going to do? I realized the first time I almost lost her that I was in love with her. Completely, pathetically in love with her, and I was going to tell her. But then she was well again and looking me in the face and I couldn't do it. I couldn't risk our friendship. I couldn't take the chance that she would walk out of my life and not even want to work with me. That would kill me. But..., on the other hand, I've tipped my hand. I know I have. I used to just get shivers when she touched me. Then I graduated to hot flashes where I had to walk away or she would see my face and see the heat there. I've spent years hiding my feelings for her and it's getting tougher. Now, I can't even touch her at all, without feeling my groin tighten. This afternoon was proof of that. What's going on in that pretty head of yours, Scully? Innuendo and teasing are one thing. She will sometimes play along but never lets it go too far. Well, guess it's on to the cold shower and get dressed. I have to get rid of this hard-on that crops up every time I think of her. I decided to wear my oldest, worn out pair of jeans. They are a little snug in the thighs, but loose in the waist and groin area from long use and many washes. I hope if I get excited, it won't show so much as it did in my dress slacks. Christ, I hope she doesn't mention it. What the hell would I say? She won't. She was probably repulsed and mortified. No, we'll both ignore it, and pretend it didn't happen, just like we do with so many of our feelings and reactions to each other. At least that's the case with me. Deny everything…….. TITLE: HEALING OPHELIA PART 2: (RATED R) My brain won't shut down. I keep hearing my mother 'so voice in my head. After Mulder had called for the fourth day in a row, she said, 'If that man's love for you wasn't so beautiful, it would be pathetic.' I argued with her. I told her Mulder had no interest in me that way. That we were partners, we were colleagues, we were friends, but that was where it ended. Mom had just shook her head and replied, 'Ya know, darling, for a smart woman, you can be incredibly dense.' I'd been so offended and sputtered on about how she didn't know anything about my life anymore and that's why I'd come up there to fix that. Yes, I cared about Mulder and he cared about me, but it would never go beyond friendship. She had just looked at me and said, 'I know you have to figure it out for yourself, and nobody could ever tell you anything anyway - just like your father. But you mark my words. Fox Mulder is in love with you and someday he's going to get tired of behaving himself, so don't be surprised when the day comes that he just grabs you and puts you in a lip lock.' 'MOM!' I'd cried. She had shocked me with her precise, no nonsense account of what would happen when Mulder stopped behaving himself. I'd had dreams about what Mulder would do if he stopped behaving himself. I didn't need her help in that area. I been spending the better part of the last two or three years suppressing any 'inappropriate' thoughts about my partner. Now my mother was displaying them as though they were laid out on the coffee table, and they were perfectly O.K. I thought I'd hid them so well. This was not the mother I was used to, the one that was quiet and supportive and didn't argue with me and never asked about my love life. Then she told me a shocker. Mulder had tried to quit the Bureau when I was gone. After I was first abducted by Duane Barry. Why hadn't he told me? Quit? For what? My mother had looked at me like I was the densest person on earth. She said, "Because he didn't want to work without you, Dana. Skinner and I had run into each other in the hospital when you were returned. He had confided in me then, that he 'thought he'd lost him.' He told me he wouldn't accept his resignation, but gave him a leave of absence. Later when Fox arrived at the hospital, Mom asked him about it during one of those quiet moments. She'd asked, 'Why would you quit the Bureau, that's not what Dana would want.' All he'd said was, 'She has to get better, without her, everything's just pointless.' I knew then Dana, I knew then that he was in love with you, even if he didn't realize it himself." Then she'd said the thing that disturbed me the most - 'Be careful Dana. Think about it. Love - true love comes along only once in a lifetime, . . . if you're lucky. Some people never find it because they are too busy planning their life and they don't see it when it comes around, and then it's gone. Or they get hung up on some stupid "rule" they think is the end all and be all of life instead of listening to what their experience and their heart tells them. They wait too long, and they've missed their chance. You are lucky to have someone love you as much as he does. I know you love him. Don't let him get away, Dana. I don't want to see you end up alone.' I'd went on and on about how our relationship was professional. He'd probably just quit because he felt it was his fault that I was taken. She'd said I couldn't fool her. She'd seen the way I'd look at him and the way he'd looked at me. I'd said that even if there was something there, it was one- sided, which I didn't think there was anything there anyway. She'd said 'Stop lying to yourself.' I'd gotten mad and ended with, besides, it was against bureau policy for partners to fraternize with one another, etc., etc. Mom had burst out into a belly laugh. 'Fraternize? Fraternize? Is that the term they use?' I hadn't seen what was so funny. When her mirth was under control she gave me a sad look and said something else I'd never heard come out of her mouth . . . 'Fuck the Bureau.' I was too stunned at hearing that word come out of her mouth that I was unable to respond. I just sat there with my mouth hanging open. She continued. 'Jobs come and jobs go, you could end up practicing medicine, or just be in another division of the bureau if you couldn't work together, so what? Having someone to share your life with is more important than any job, Dana. And if you don't know that, if you don't feel that in your heart, then I feel sorry for you.' With that, she turned on her heel and left the room. All I could think was she didn't tell me to close my mouth or I'd catch flies. What happened to that Mom? She was tired of waiting for her little girl to grow up in the ways that counted. I had cried then, just sat there and cried. I was so confused. My feelings for him were wrong, inappropriate. But I couldn't get rid of them. I knew in my heart that I didn't want anyone else. Was that love? I didn't want to end up alone. That night I had the dream again. I was having sex with a man. I couldn't see his face. His chest was rubbing on mine. He was so tall, his head was above mine. In the dream I strain my head back to look up into his face to see who this magnificent man is who is making me tremble. And it's Mulder's face, shining with desire and love for me. I hear his voice like an echo, 'I love you so much." I woke up, the rippling spasms of an orgasm rocking my body. I am covered with sweat as usual. I gulp for air and then sank back down onto the mattress, groaning to myself, "Christ, how many times am I going to have this dream?" 'Thou doth protest too much.' Two days later I'm sitting in my office, sitting in my partner's lap with his enormous hard-on poking me in the rump. Was Mom right? God help me, Scully, you have no idea what you do to me. What did he mean? I excite him? Is it just lust he feels? How do I feel about him? It's all a jumble. So my brain keeps turning as I put the seafood soufflé in the oven. I know he loves seafood. I showered earlier but still have to change my clothes. What the hell should I wear? I went to my closet in the bedroom and proceeded to try on five different things. I was holding up a dark yellow sundress with a low back and wide straps on the shoulders. The dip ended a little below my shoulder blades. It had a crew neck and buttoned all the way down the front. You couldn't wear a bra with it because of the dip in the back, but the skirt fell to just below my knees. Out of nowhere the thought came unbidden. 'You wouldn't have wear any underwear with this.' My head swam. What the hell was I thinking? Could Mom be right? Did I have a chance? And if so, did I want to take the risk? I heard the door bell ring and realized there were shirts, pants and dresses all over the floor and I'm standing there in my underwear and bra holding this dress and daydreaming. I holler out to the door, "Just a sec, I'll be right there." I pick up the discarded clothes and toss them into my closet and shut the door, quickly strip off my underwear and bra and throw them in with the clothes in the bottom of the closet and throw the dress over my head. It settles on my shoulders, the fitted bodice hugs my breasts, but not too tight and falls loosely around my waist. I shrug, slide my feet into my flat, flip-flop type sandals and trotted to the door. Taking a deep breath, I swing the door wide and . . . 'Good God! No one has a right to look that good! He's standing with his shoulder leaning casually against the doorjamb, obviously waiting for me to open the door. "Hi, Scully," he says. "Hi, yourself," I shoot back. His hair is combed, but that errant lock that never wants to stay put is falling carelessly across his forehead. He has two bottles of wine dangling from the fingers of his left hand, holding them by the necks. His other hand is across his chest, lying lightly on his ribs. He is wearing nothing special, rather worn out jeans in fact and a thick, white tee shirt. But those jeans are slung low on his hips and they are snug on his thighs. His shirt is snug too, not tight, but snug and I see every muscle in his stomach and his chest. My eyes travel from his face down his torso, hungrily taking in the sight of him. I slide my view down to his legs. I have an incredibly stupid urge to run my hand down those thighs. I look at the top of his legs and can't help thinking, I wonder what's in there? I realize that I am staring and force myself to look up at his eyes, blushing as I do so. He has that silly, lop-sided grin on again, and I feel the flop in my chest. "Can I come in or were you going to serve dinner out here in the hallway?" "Oh, God, sorry". I back away and sweep my hand into the living room. He pushes away from the doorjamb and walks slowly into the living room, stopping just short of the coffee table, where he bends down to set the bottles on the coffee table. He walks like a panther when he isn't in a hurry - so much ease and grace - not to mention how great his ass looks. "I bought a red, Cabernet Sauvignon, and a white, some local stuff. Didn't know what you were making. Was afraid to ask." This last is said in a teasing voice and I immediately rise to the challenge, since I want to gloss over my 'oh so obvious' perusal of his body in the doorway a minute earlier. "Ah, you think you know me, Agent Mulder, but I have hidden talents." That didn't sound right. He smiles broadly now, enjoying the flirt. He's much better at this than I am. "Do you now, Agent Scully? And what talents would those be?" I'm stumped. God I suck at this, never did learn how to flirt. "Uh, well, food for a start." "You eat food, good for you." "I make food . . . I mean I can cook . . . food. . ." There goes his eyebrow again, quirking up on one side as he waits, amused, for me to finish my sentence. I'm embarrassed now, my normally glib repertoire deserting me when I need it most. "I took gourmet cooking classes once," I blurt out, in a vain attempt to salvage my dignity. It's pretty much in shreds at this point and I look at the floor, suddenly feeling like crying and not knowing why. I can feel the sting in my eyes and I squeeze them shut tightly so as not to let a tear escape. I can't even look up at him. Before I know it, he's beside me and wrapping his arms around me and tipping my chin up to look him, which I try to return to the floor. He won't let me. My bottom lip is quivering, but the tears are contained. "God, Dana, I'm sorry. I was just teasing you. I didn't know it was a sore subject." 'Dana? Did he call me Dana?' I sniffle and shake my head and look down again. "No, I don't know what's the matter with me. I know I'm not the picture of domesticity and it usually doesn't matter what anyone thinks of my home skills, but. . ., but . .I just wanted ... for you... " I have no idea where I'm going with this, so I stop. All I can do right now is think about the fact that his legs are lightly brushing against mine, and his arms are wrapped around my shoulders. "I'm sorry, Dana, look at me." It's a command. I look up and he brushes his thumb across my quivering bottom lip. I suck in a sharp breath and catch the lip under my top teeth. His thumb worries at it until it slips from my teeth and he rubs his thumb across it again. It's like an electrical current tingles my lip wherever he touches it. All I can do is stare like a deer stuck in the headlights. He leans in close to my face and tips his head away from my lips at the last second to bring his lips to my ear. God I hate it when he does this. I love it when he does this. He smells like pungent fresh air and soap. "I'm sure whatever it is it'll be delicious and even it isn't, it'll beat the pizza and beer I was going to have tonight." I smile in spite of my embarrassment. "Sorry, Mulder, I don't know what happened." "Stop apologizing and let's eat." "O.K." I came so close to laying my mouth on hers. That quivering lip killed me. I just wanted to suck on it. Would she have stopped me? I hate it when she cries. I never want to make her cry but I guess I've done it quite a few times. I never mean to. But there are so many things I don't know about her private life and her past. We're eating a scrumptious seafood soufflé and laughing and chatting. She really can cook and I'm impressed. She wanted to cook for me? Is that what she was trying to say? That thought makes me unreasonably happy. Was she trying to impress me? Is that why it upset her that I teased about her cooking skills? I'm responding to her chatter on auto pilot. Is she nervous? She doesn't usually chatter. All I can think about is her bold scan of my body when she opened the door. I keep replaying it in my mind. I didn't dare move. I could feel the heat wherever her eyes touched me. I'd felt that familiar tightening in my groin. I was getting hard. Thank god she didn't notice. Glad I wore these jeans too! I couldn't believe she was checking me out like that. It wasn't wishful thinking this time. She was staring at my body. The question is, 'did she like what she saw? I'd love to know what those hidden talents are, Scully. If I reacted so strongly just to her looking at me, what the hell would I do if she decided to be forward or aggressive? I know she cares for me, as a friend, but ... could she possibly think I'm attractive? No, don't get your hopes up. Let it go. Dinner went well. Mulder oohhed and aahhed over the soufflé, pouring it on a little thick, I think. But it really was good and I was pleased when he got serious and sincerely told me that was the best meal he's had in a long time. He couldn't get better in a restaurant. He did seem a little surprised still, which irked me, but only for a second. We retired to the couch after I put on some soft jazz in the background and brought some glasses out to the coffee table. We had polished off the white wine during dinner. We'd both eaten enough though and I wasn't buzzed, just feeling very relaxed. He poured the red wine and handed me one and leaned back into the corner of the couch. I kicked off my shoes. I tried sitting on my legs Indian style, I tried pulling them up underneath me, I tried leaning back like he was, but I'm too short to relax that way. I couldn't get comfortable. I was trying not to touch him. We were making idle conversation about what was going on at work while I was gone. He was watching me closely and it just made me more self-conscious. I was in the middle of an explanation of systolic blood pressure versus dystolic blood pressure when he stopped me mid- sentence. "So the bottom number, the dystolic pressure measures the pressure in the artery after it contracts, at its lowest point, see, so . . ." Quietly, "You're driving me crazy, Scully." I stopped and stared at him, not sure what he meant. "If you don't stop squirming, I'm going to have to come over there and hold you down and I don't think you want that." 'Yeah, I do want that, actually. Do I?' His voice is perfectly calm, perfectly reasonable, and to an outsider what would look like a blank look on his face. I knew better. He was teasing, but he was serious too. He would carry out his threat. Maybe I should let him. "Uh, then, what would you suggest?" He carefully placed his wineglass on the coffee table, and casually reached down and plucked up one of the thin decorative pillows that belonged to the couch and had been tossed on the floor before we sat. He used the toes of one foot to kick off one sneaker and then the other. He looked at me with that 'This is a challenge to see what you will do' look. Then he spun his butt on couch, threw one leg up flush with the back of the couch, the other on the floor, and put the pillow between his legs. He leaned back on the arm of the couch, picked up his wineglass, raised an eyebrow at me and slowly took a sip of his wine. He was watching over the rim of his glass. I was frozen. This seemed to be a recurring event, . . . muscle lock. He patted the pillow with his free hand. Do it, Dana! I hesitated about 5 seconds, then put down my wine glass, spun around backwards and grabbed his ankles with my hands and scooted back between his legs and reclined onto the pillow. Silence. My hands were still on his ankles. He reached out and swiped up my wineglass and handed it to me over my shoulder. "Relax, Scully, I'm not going to bite you." "Sorry," I mumbled, taking the glass from him and leaning back a bit more. He brought his other leg up on the couch and slowly slid it down brushing my hip and down my thigh. I repressed a shiver. Even in this position, his long legs reach to just below my knees. It struck me how much taller he was than I am. I didn't pay attention to it most of the time. Each of his legs was lowered and now rested below my arms. I let my arms rest on his thighs. Just the heat of his legs was making me feel languid. "I don't want to talk about work anymore. Let's talk about something else," he said. "Hmm, O.K., what do you want to talk about?" "Tell me about your trip to your mother's place." Uh oh. How do I talk about this? "Let's see, well, we spent a wonderful 6 days together. We laughed and talked and shopped and then got on each other's nerves. Then she forgot I'm 34 years old and tried to tell me what to do about my job and my love life and then I left." Succinct, I thought. "Ahh, moms never stop being moms, do they?" "No, I guess not, but it gets old after a while. Contrary to common belief, they don't always know what's best for you." "No? Why? What did she suggest?" I chuckled. There was no good way to get out of this one and I knew he wouldn't let it go. He never does. "She said a lot of things." Neutral. "Like what?" "Oh, I don't know, it was all mommy bunk anyway." "Mommy bunk?" He laughed. "I never heard that one before." He chuckled again and I felt it vibrate through my torso. He so rarely laughed. It brought a smile to my face even though he couldn't see it. I was finding this position interesting. I could touch him, innocently, and yet, I found that it was easier to say things to him when I wasn't looking at him. That face unnerved me. His eyes could immobilize me. I seemed to be especially sensitive tonight to every move he made. I took another sip of wine. Then he said, "Summarize." He was always popping out these questions in a delayed reaction. It always took me a second to catch up. Ah, we were playing the question and answer game. "What?" "Summarize what your mother told you - summarize the 'lots of things' that she said." "Hmmm, well, basically she um..." "Well, basically she um? Very articulate, Scully." Now I was chuckling. "Give me a minute." He waited patiently, sipping his wine. I felt his legs squeeze my thighs a little, real gentle. Not even sure it happened. It did. My body's response was immediate. I felt the sweat break out on my hairline and the heat spread throughout my abdomen. 'Christ, this was ridiculous.' The thoughts running through my head. '. . .you have no idea what you do to me.' 'You always smell so good, baby powder and cinnamon. It feels so good to hold you . . . you can stop me . . .' "Scully?" "Oh, yeah, well, basically she said . . . Fuck the Bureau and get a love life." He choked. He sat straight up, wrapping one arm around my waist and holding his wineglass out over the table to keep from spilling. I felt him cough a couple more times, clear his throat. He set his wineglass down and started laughing. "Did she really say that?" "Yup." It was contagious. I started laughing. Soon we had tears streaming down our faces. "God bless your mother, she is a trip!" He swiped his face with his hand and brought it down to rest on my shoulder. My mirth died instantly as tingling started from his hand and spread down my arm. I flinched and he removed his hand. Before I knew what I was saying, the words came out. I whispered, "It's O.K." God I have to admit this. I want him to touch me. I want it badly. He tentatively placed his hand back on my shoulder. Silence. Moments passed and he scooted back so he was sitting more upright with his back to the armrest. I felt the arm around my waist tighten and he pulled me back into his chest. The pillow was gone. The shock of feeling my bare skin exposed in the dip of my dress against his tee shirt was jarring. Heat! I tensed. His hands fell on my shoulders and started to knead the muscles. "Relax, Scully. " I couldn't suppress a groan and the tension slid out of my back and I slumped against him. He continued to work my muscles in my shoulders, occasionally sliding his thumbs up the cords in the back of my neck. I was limp now. It felt so good. I said so. "God, Mulder, that feels so goo...ood." He stilled, then started working down on my shoulder blades. I leaned forward and moaned again. After a minute or two, he stopped, cupped my shoulders and pulled me against him again. I could feel him slide his hips down a bit and I reclined a little more, my hands resting on his thighs. I wasn't consciously thinking at that moment. I was enjoying the heat of his body. I started raking my nails lightly on his jeans, down the top of his thighs. My elbows were touching his hips. I heard the sharp intake of his breath and stopped. He breathed out and whispered, "It's O.K." My own words coming back to haunt me. I froze for a beat and then laid my palms on his thighs and began sliding them slowly up and down the outside of his thighs, real slow. He's hard again, I can feel it, because I touched his legs. The thoughts again. 'What the hell has gotten into me? God, his heat feels so good.' His hands came to rest on my waist, his thumbs rubbing slightly against the small of my back. His hands were so big; the thumbs almost met in the middle my back. One hand slid slowly up and inside the open back of my dress, around the front and began caressing the skin of my rib cage. I tensed a little but he didn't stop. He whispered, "you're so soft." I could hear him breathing a bit heavy. I sucked in a sharp breath. "Wha, what are you do..doing, Mul...der?" Great, I'm stuttering. "You can stop me, Dana." Do I want to? He brought his hand down to my navel and caressed the skin. I don't have any underwear on! His hand brushed back up my stomach and his thumb skimmed along the bottom of my breast. I gasped. He holds still for a heartbeat or two. I can feel his heartbeat on my back. It's rapid. I can't stop him. Please, Mulder, touch me. He does. His hand slides up and cups my breast and squeezes gently, then his thumb rakes over my nipple and it becomes instantly hard as a pebble and protruding into him palm. I moan -- I can't help it -- low, long, and loud. 'When did I start wanting him so much? Wanting him to touch me? When did he start making me feel like a beautiful woman instead of just his partner? Oh, god, I just felt a gush of warmth between my legs.' "Oh God, Mulder..." Oh my god, I'm touching her, really touching her and she isn't stopping me. Her skin is so soft. I go slow. I don't want to startle her out of whatever mood that is allowing her to let me touch her. Her skin is like silk. This dress, god, she isn't wearing a bra. Would she let me? Could I get away with that? Touching her breast. I shouldn't push it. . . I have to try. She kept brushing my thighs with her hands. She's never touched me like that before. I know she must be able to feel my arousal. She isn't stopping me. I slide my hand up and brush the bottom of her breast. I hear her sharp intake of breath. I still, she doesn't stop me. I can't help myself now. I slide my hand up to cup her full breast and run my thumb over the peak of her breast. Jesus, I just felt her nipple get hard, because I touched her. Am I dreaming or is she moaning because I'm touching her? How many times have I dreamt of her making a sound like that for me? I want her so badly my usual caution goes flying out the window. He stilled and I felt his lips near my ear again. "Has anyone ever made love to you, Dana?" 'Dana again.' It took a minute for the question to register. 'He couldn't possibly mean what I think he means.' "Mulder, you don't think I'm a virgin, do you?" That was dumb. The words slipped out before I could think anymore. For pity sake, I couldn't even think when he was touching me. "No, I don't mean that. I mean has anybody ever made love to you . . . as opposed to having sex with you?" This question puzzled me. My brain goes on pause. "What's the difference, I mean, there just two phrases to describe the same thing. Right? I mean one is more politically correct than the other, but . . ." "There's a big difference." He paused. "God, no one ever has." "No one ever has what?" "Made love to you." His hand is still on my breast. "How can you be sure?" Silence. "What's the difference then?" "If anyone had ever made love to you, you would know the difference. The fact that you don't know, tells me that no one has ever made love to you." His hand pulls away and I almost whimper at the loss. "Explain that please." My voice was clipped and I was getting a little angry. I wasn't sure if it was because this was breaking the bubble of that silent mood that was turning me on, or if I felt stupid. His voice is calm and sad. "Men have had sex with you, on you, for you, or for themselves, but they've never made love to you." I shook my head, not really understanding what he was trying to say. "Mulder..." He kept talking as though I hadn't tried to interrupt him. "When a man makes love to you, your pleasure is more important than his. Giving you pleasure, gives him pleasure. It's slow and fast, it's easy and hard, it's exciting and nerve racking all at the same time. Everywhere he touches you, you can feel it." "Feel what?" Silence. "Feel what, Mulder?" "I forgot one little detail." "What's that?" "He has to be in love with you." Silence. Well, that's it then, end of story. He wasn't finished. "If he is in love with you, you feel it when he touches you, it's a kind of . . . reverence mixed with respect ... maybe a little awe too." 'Why did this little tid bit make my heart beat faster and my mouth go dry. "Sounds very romantic, Mulder, but . . ." 'God, my mouth is so dry.' "But you don't believe me." He sounded sad and disappointed. I'm nervous now. Are we even having this discussion? How did we get here? "I don't know what I believe. I've had sex before. I've enjoyed it before. I've not enjoyed it sometimes, . . . depends. I've always had this slight Oedipus thing, probably because of my attachment to my father. I always wanted to make him proud. Or, well, Oedipus, that's a son for his mother. What's a daughter for a father? Ophelia complex? I just made that up. Not based in fact. And I don't mean incestuous either, ya know, a kind of mental thing. Anyway, I always go to older men, men in control. I feel a need to please them. Jack, the older agent with more experience. Daniel the instructor in med school and my mentor. In some ways I wanted them to have that control over me. In other ways it chaffed, and I'm never sure what to do with those feelings. You're in control a lot of times, too. I feel like a high school kid sometimes. Maybe I'm just socially inept and need to be led. God wouldn't that be horrendous. The self sufficient, strong, smart, Dr. Scully wants to be a sheep sometimes. Anyway, I've never quite been able to cure myself of always being drawn to that type. It's like a sickness." 'You're babbling. Shut up. So what, so I'm babbling. He isn't saying anything.' I still haven't turned to look at him. I have no idea what his reaction is to all this. I hear him take a deep breath. "And me?" he whispers. He really wants to know. "Well, I am drawn to you." "Are you?" He doesn't believe me. "Christ, all women are, you're a very handsome man." Silence again. "Mulder, you know I am." "Do I?" "Yes. I'm telling you now. But, you don't fit the profile, Mulder, you're not at all what I'm used to, therefore, I don't know how to behave with you..." "Behave any way you want." "Maybe that's the problem." "What's that?" "Maybe I don't know what I want." "I do." "Huh?" "I mean...I know what I want." I can't ask. "You scare me." "Scare you? Why?" "You make me feel things..." "Sorry." He sounds mock apologetic, almost sarcastic. "No, don't be. It's me, Mulder. These feelings I have, not knowing what to do with them. I don't know what to think about them." "Humor me. For the next couple of minutes, don't think." "Don't think?" "Don't think. Just feel." "I'll try. "Because if you just feel, maybe I can cure you." "Cure me?" "Of your Ophelia complex." "Oh that." His hand comes up from my waist where it had stilled. His hands are on either side of my head, twisting into my hair. I can feel the heat from them. I shiver a little. He tilts my head back and to the side, exposing my neck. I feel a little thrill run through me. His lips are near my ear again, only this time they brush lightly over my earlobe and the shell of my ear as he talks. "I have a question." I am swallowing a gasp from the feelings that are rushing through me. It's almost like I can feel the blood rushing in my veins. "Mmmm?" That's all the coherent sound I'm capable of at the moment. "What do you feel when I touch you?" "Mulder..." "What do you feel, Scully? What do you want?" I almost sob. "I'm excited. I'm turned on. I want...I want you to keep touching me." "If I were to tell you . . ." 'His lips are still brushing my ear. His breath is hot. "that I wanted to make love to you . . .more than I've ever wanted anything in my entire life," 'Did he just say what I think he said?!' "would you slap my face and call me a lunatic? Would you push me away?" I'm breathing very shallow right now, afraid to move. He's asked his question. I can hardly remember what it was. I take a calm steadying breath and twist around to look at him. He lets go of my head and lets me turn. 'Oops, shouldn't have done that. I'm staring into those bottomless green/hazel eyes and they are dark, his lids are at half-mast, his lips are wet and look so soft. They are parted slightly, and I can see the tip of his tongue between his teeth. That lock of hair is falling across his forehead. My god, has any creature ever looked this sexy? Do I want to be cured? Don't think, Dana. Don't think. 'I can see the desire on his face. I feel the heat pouring off him. But is that what it is? Lust, desire? No, he said make love to me. But that would mean, by his own definition that he ... no, ... that he's ... in love with me? Is that possible? Mom, where are you now? He's still staring at me. Watching me watching him. He has gone still, as though afraid to startle me. 'What was the question?' 'Slap his face and call him a lunatic?' "Dana?" He reaches up again and puts his hands on the side of neck this time. His eyes lock with mine. He waits. "I don't think . . ." "Don't think, just tell me what you feel." "It's so crazy in some ways Mulder, but I don't think ...I could...I can't." I'm the biggest ass in the world. Did she just say what I think she said? My heart is in my stomach and I am ready to cry over my blatant stupidity. How could I have asked her that? I can't look at her. I always told myself that if by some miracle something ever did happen, it would be because she came to me, because she initiated it. I blew it. She can't. God the words hurt even worse than I thought they would. Then I feel her hand on my shoulder and hear her whisper. He folds in on himself a bit, his head hangs down and he looks at his lap. I realize he has taken this as a rejection. Did I mean it to be? No! Suddenly, I can't let him think that. Just feel. He's pulling away. It isn't what I want. Damn the consequences. I rephrase my answer. "Mulder, I don't think I could push you away." My voice is barely above a whisper. WHAT? Am I hallucinating again. I look up at her. She doesn't think she could push me away? She doesn't think she could push me away! God my head is swimming. I want to make love to her more than anything I've ever wanted in my life. I'm dizzy. My heart is beating a mile a minute. She is so beautiful right now, staring into my eyes, I can't breath. Pull her in, Fox! That's right, Dumbo, nothing happens if you don't move. God, she isn't pulling away. I am two seconds away from kissing her when I get bitten by the milk-toast asshole bug and I've got to tell her how I feel and give her one last chance to walk away. The way I feel might frighten her. I'm an utter idiot, but I have to tell her. I have to make sure she wants this. The only thing worse than not being able to touch her would be to touch her and have her regret it the next day. I couldn't take that. If we do this, I know I'll never be able to look back. I'll be lost. She has the power to utterly destroy me…. TITLE: HEALING OPHELIA Healing Ophelia PART 3: (O.K., RATED, NC-17, Here's where we rock 'n roll). His head snaps up and his eyes lock with mine again. His eyes are suspiciously wet. I feel the gentle pressure of his hands on my neck, pulling me forward. My body twists around and I kneel between his legs, put my hands out to sides of his shoulders to catch myself from falling forward. He is moving my head so slowly, it's almost torture. Still doesn't want to startle me. He brings me within a hair's breath of his lips, his eyes still locked on mine. He is searching my eyes. I think about the feel of his hands on my neck. All he sees there is desire. His lips are just barely brushing mine when he says, "I've wanted to touch you for so long . . . you're so beautiful . . . you're so smart it scares me . . . and no one . . . no one has ever turned me on like you do with just a look . . . god, just a look, Dana, and my knees are like jelly . . . just a smile and my stomach is butterflies." He's breathing faster now, a little heavier. I can't believe what he's saying. I can feel his hand trembling on my neck where he touches me. Then the kicker. "God help me, Dana, I'm so in love with you." Mom was right!I gasp and my mouth opens and my eyes go wide. Before any sound comes out, his mouth is on mine. 'His lips are sideways on mine. He's chewing gently on my top lip, oh god. He is sucking on my bottom lip. God, I'm trembling now. His tongue is pushing gently against my teeth.' I open my mouth and feel his tongue slide in, slow. Then he starts exploring every millimeter of the inside of my mouth and sucking my tongue into his mouth. ' O.K., I'm a puddle now. Dishrag Dana, that's me.' I want this more than I even realized. Well, Mom, he got tired of behaving himself. My body collapses on his and my hands land on his shoulders. He is now cupping my hips with his fingers. He comes up for breath and pulls me hard against him. I can feel his erection pushing into my stomach. There is an answering quiver and gush of warmth between my legs. He looks at me a second longer and then gently leans forward and pulls me to my feet. I feel the loss of his body heat. It's an empty feeling. I want that heat. I want more of it. I utter one word, "Bedroom." Another beat and he bends down, putting an arm underneath my knees and swings me up into his arms. I grab his neck for support and he cradles me against his chest and walks gracefully, despite my weight down the hall and into my bedroom and deposits me gently on the bed. I forget how strong he is. I opened my mouth to say his name and his fingers came to rest on my lips. I nod my head in understanding and he straightens and walks over the phone on the nightstand and turns off the ringer and turns on the machine. I smile. He walks to the door and shuts it. He walks to the dresser and lights the lone candle on top. It's cinnamon scented, and he inhales and turns to me with that quirky smile. "Mulder . . ." "Fox." "What?" "Would you call me Fox, especially when I touch you." "But you said no one could call you Fox." He sighs and looks at the ceiling, then back at me. "You did, this morning in the office, twice." "You noticed that?" "Yes." "You didn't correct me." "No." "Why?" He looked at the ceiling again as though looking for guidance and again turned to me. His voice was quiet, subdued. "I decided a long time ago that no one could call me Fox, nobody . . . except . . . The One. I would want her to call me Fox." "The One?" "Yeah, you know. I can't believe I'm telling you this." His smile is self-deprecating. "Tell me, please." "The One - The One I ... fell in love with. The One I wanted . . ." He swallowed hard before spitting out the last part. "wanted to spend my life with." "But .." "You are The One, Scully. I've known it for a long time." His eyes were tearing now, and I nodded my head at him. I couldn't talk, I wanted him so much. He had no idea. "Mul ..., oops, I mean Fox. I don't know what to say ..." A tear leaked out of the corner of my eyes and started a slow track down my face. "Shhhh, don't respond to that now." He put his finger to his own lips. "I don't expect a response, I just needed to tell you. I don't expect you to feel the same way. I'm thinking, But I do feel the same way. He continued, "Right now, I just want ... you." He catches the tear on his finger and licked it off with his tongue. I'm beginning to get it. We seem to be moving in slow motion. It's sort of like a spell where the rest of world has disappeared and he doesn't want to break the spell. I nod again. He comes over to the bed, and sits beside me, our hips touching. He simply reaches up and unclasps the top button on my dress. I watch his face as he moves down to the second button. He leans in and the kissing begins again. I pull his arms roughly and he tumbles onto the bed. He lifts his face and chuckles. His hand makes its way to my thigh and brushes lightly before coming up to undo another button. I'm not wearing a bra. My breasts feel heavy - He whispers, "Only whispers . . ." I nod my head. "What do you want? What do you feel? Tell me." I'm too caught up in the anticipation, the arousal to be embarrassed. I just blurt it out, but in a whisper. "Want you. Fox, your touch makes my breasts ache." A small groan slips out of his throat and pushes away the material of my dress and drops his mouth to the underside of my breast at the same time. I gasp a little and then let out a low, shuddering moan when his mouth latches onto my nipple. His other hand pays attention to the other one, first running his thumb over it, then cupping the whole breast and squeezing slightly, and then lightly twisting the nub between his thumb and forefinger. His tongue is laving my other nipple and then sucking on it alternately. I don't know which sensation to pay attention to there are so many. So I just moan again. "MMMMM", he vibrates against the nipple. I almost choke on the sensation that causes, the vibrations coursing straight to my uterus. I whimper. "Tell me," he breathes against my breast before laving the nipple again. I am beyond coherent thought at this point and just tell him what I can croak out. "Har...harder." He scraps his teeth over the nipple, causing me to yelp and then latches on with vigor, his hand coming up to support the underside of my breast and squeeze gently, while his mouth suckles, slow, but sooo hard. God you can't really suck on it too hard, can you? I buck a little on the bed and his hand slides down to my knee and begins a journey up my thigh. I feel his hand inching towards its goal and the words just seem to slip out again. "Touch me." I'm totally out of control. Admit it, Dana, you're in love with him. No one has ever gotten me this excited before penetration. Even with penetration for that matter. I have no recollection of feeling these sensations ever before. His hand reaches the juncture where my thigh meets my groin. Now it's his turn to gasp. He looks up startled. "You're not wearing any underwear?" he whispers. I smile and chuckle. "No, guess not." "Good thing I didn't know that before, I never would have made it in here." I chuckle again. "Scully, you can stop me anytime you want. "Dana, call me Dana." "O.K. Dana, just tell me and I'll stop if you get uncomfortable with this." "Mulder?" "Fox." "Fox?" "MMM, HMM?" "Keep going. I want you to touch me everywhere. Show me. Make love to me." "HhuuuuHhh," is all he says. I know the feeling! Without further adieu, he slides his fingers over my red wiry curls and then sinks two fingers inside me and runs his thumb over my nub at the top of my lips. My hips buck off the bed and I let out a little shout. He stops suddenly and pulls away. My arms reach up to prevent it until I see him fumbling with the button on the dress. I help him until they are all undone and he pulls the fabric away from my body and just stares. His eyes travel from the tip of my toes to the top of my head. He pulls me up so he can take the dress off my arms and tosses it to the floor. "I have never seen anyone as stunningly beautiful or incredibly sexy as you, Dana. I'm stunned." 'What do you say to that?' I blush. He lowers himself between my legs, pulling my legs over his shoulders and sinks his face between my legs. I can feel his tongue lapping my lips and the sensation is incredible. His tongue stiffens and pushes inside me and I let out another yelp. Two fingers sink inside me again and those lips, those beautiful lips move to close around my center of pleasure and pull . . . and nip . . . and suck . . . and "ooohhh, gooodd, Foooxxx." He takes me right to the edge and pulls back, right to the edge and pulls back. He kneels up and puts his hands on either side of my waist, looking at my face. I can see my wetness on his lips and shining on his chin, and it drives me insane. I reach up and bring him down to kiss me again, tasting myself on those lips and licking his chin. Now it's his turn to groan. I suddenly realize he is still dressed. I whisper, "Lose the clothes Mulder." He leaps off the bed and stops. I raise an eyebrow. "Fox," he corrects me. I smile. "Get naked, Fox." Without losing eye contact, he slowly jimmies his tee shirt out of his jeans, then plays with hem before crossing him arms and slowly, so slowly, pulling it up and over his head. He stops with his arms above his head still tangled in the shirt, his biceps bulging from the position they are in and his chest exposed to my eyes. Good lord, no one should get that many good attributes. His body is so well toned. I can see the definition of pecs, they are muscular but not overly so. His torso tapers down to his small waist. His abs are a washboard. There is dark hair, wispy on his chest and gathering thickness as it travels down the V under his navel and disappears into his jeans. He grins at my reaction, throws the tee shirt on the floor. He unsnaps his fly and lowers the zipper, just an inch or so, so that the jeans fall a bit and ride even lower on his hips. He closes his eyes, leans his head over backwards a little sighs when his erection is given more room. Good lord, he's stripping for me, teasing me. I begin to pant. I know my eyes are wide, and my mouth is hanging open, but I can't help it. I can see his hipbones outlined in his snug underwear. I can see the top of his J. Crews. And yes, I can see his erection poking the material up over his waistband. I gulp. He bends over to remove his socks and then stands up slowly again. He turns around so his back is to me. I can tell he's unzipped his jeans and he hooks his thumbs on the side of his jeans and moves them down, first one side, then the other, slowly. "Uuuhh," is all the sound I can make. This slow tease is such a turn-on. He finally slides them down his legs and steps out of them. He straightens as I admire his ass. Perfect. Muscular, not to big, not too small. He turns slowly to face me and hooks his hands into the elastic of his boxers. He smiles that lop sided smile at me and I grunt again. Seems that the only sound I can make as I slide on my stomach to the edge of the bed. He gently lifts the elastic up and out and slides his hands down his thighs, taking the underwear with him. He lets them fall, flicks them away with his foot. He spreads his legs a little, plants his feet, puts his hands on his hips and tilts his head back, and groans a small groan. My eyes slide down to his stomach and I gasp. His erection is full. I can see it bobbing slightly with the throbbing of blood. It stands straight up, hovering about an inch and half from his stomach muscles. My god, the head ends just above his navel. He is big, really big. And big around, thick. I groan just looking at it and motion him to come to me with my hand. He walks to me slowly and stops with his knees against the bed. He lifted his knee to climb onto the bed, but I stopped him with a hand on his thigh. "I want to look at you." I reach up and cup his testicles gently with one hand. They spill over both sides of my hand. "Dana, oh god..." he gasped. I propped myself up on one elbow and slid the cupping hand up to the base of his penis and squeeze gently. A drop of precome oozed out of the head and I closed my eyes slowly and opened them again. My hands are small, the fingers barely make it around the base to meet. The look on her face when I got undressed was like a dream. She was devouring my body with her eyes, the way I'd done to her so many times when she wasn't looking. I wanted to tease her. I was shaking with anticipation. How would she react when I was completely naked? Then, finally naked, I groaned a sigh of relief for two reasons. One, my throbbing erection was finally free of the confining clothes. Two, she wasn't running from the room. I was afraid, once I was naked, she would snap out of whatever mood got us here and she would have a sudden attack of, 'What am I doing?' She's motioning me to come to her with that 'come hither' look on her face. I'm about to get on the bed when her palm connects with my thigh, stopping me. The heat of her little white hand gave me a shiver. What will she do? Does she want to look more? Let her get used to you slow. Softly, she says, "I want to look at you." Oh, Christ, she's touching me. So gentle, like she's holding glass, her hand cupped under my sacs. I feel her slide up and grip me firmly at the base...and squeeze. My knees trembled a little and I felt the release of a drop of fluid from my tip. God, she's looking at it intently. Will she do that? I can barely breath. Don't move Fox. God, those lips, how many dreams...How many fantasies... Holy shit, she's taking me into her mouth. "My lord, Fox, your perfect, " I whispered. I could admire his endowments all night but I can't wait any longer. I hum as I lap the fluid off the head with my tongue. I revel in the hiss that comes from him. I looked up and made eye contact, opened my mouth and slowly but steadily take his shaft into my mouth. A long moan comes from his throat and he reaches out to grab the post at the foot of my bed with one hand, the other wrapping into my hair. His knees have buckled slightly and he leans into the bed for support. I can feel him throbbing against the back of my throat and I am only about 3/4 of the way down his shaft. My mouth is full. I wrap my hand around the bottom again and move gently up and down, flattening my tongue along the underside and swishing back and forth. The grunts, groans and hisses coming from him urge me on. I feel myself get wetter in response to his excitement. I'm so relaxed. Why have I feared this? I want to give him more pleasure than he's ever had before. I want to be different than the other women in his past. I'd give me anything he asked for. He doesn't know that yet, but I would. I alternate tonguing and sucking on him. He is so rigid. Any lingering nervousness or doubts fled the second I touched him and felt and heard him respond. I shift up onto my knees bending at the waist for better leverage and grab both of his rear end cheeks and slide down on him as far as I can go. His breath is ragged. He feels like soft silk over steel. The head hits the back of my throat and I stop breathing. Then I take a deep breath through my nose. Before I can think about it and change my mind, I relax my throat, tilt my chin up and push . . . and feel him sliding down my throat. Once he passes my tongue, it's easy the rest of the way. I don't' stop until my nose is buried in his wiry hair. My jaw aches a little but it's O.K. I squeeze my lips tight, release them and slide back a little. My lord, he is screaming my name! "Daaannnaa, oh Jesus, Daaannnaa, oh god, Daaannnaa, I can't believe . . ." I slide back and down again. "Oh god, no one's ever ... aahh Christ .. oh god ... Dana, I'm going to, . . .I don't want . . . not yet..." He is totally incoherent and I love it. A giddy sense of power sweeps through me. I've never deep throated anyone in my life. I've surprised and shocked myself, but I am so relaxed and it feels so right. I want to taste him. I breathe slowly through my nose. His hands are on my shoulders, trying to gently push me back and I shake my head slightly, as much as my full mouth will let me, and slide my free hand between his cheeks. He is trying to stay still. I take him into my mouth and down my throat again. His musky smell has me totally wild. When he is buried in my throat, I firmly but gently push my finger against his sphincter and apply pressure. God, his moaning is so arousing. As the tip of my finger pushes past his tight ring of muscle, I feel an incredible throb in his shaft. He gets even bigger for a second, a beat, and then explodes into my throat. His low, sexy voice yells my name and he keeps moaning. He finally loses control, the ability to stand still and starts thrusting into my mouth and down my throat. "Ahhh" - throb, gush -"Dana" - throb, gush --"Ahhh" - throb, gush --"Dana" - throb, gush-- "Ahhh" - throb, gush--"Dana" - throb, gush. I pull back some so I can taste him and suck hard on the end of his shaft. Then I just support him with my hands on his thighs until his spasms stop. His knees are buckling for real now and I move back on the bed, releasing him, and giving him room to flop down on the bed. He does, and rolls onto his back, breathing hard. Ohmyfuckinggod! I've died and gone to heaven. My tough but dainty, oh so professional, prim and proper partner, the one they call the 'ice queen' at work - just swallowed my entire cock. Wild, beautiful, crazy, tiny Dana just deep throated me! That's not an easy feat. I know, others have tried, and failed. It's not arrogance, just a fact. My penis is rather large, long and about two inches around when I'm fully erect. I never actually measured it. Seemed silly. One of the few worthwhile gifts from my father is my sexual anatomy. And I had never been so hard in my entire life. I used to be proud of it when I was younger, until I realized it wasn't always a great thing. Most women I'd been with were happy with it, but were totally unconcerned if I wasn't all the way in. If they were full, they were happy. My wishes be damned. I got used to paying attention to it and not wanting to get too rough and hurt them, always paying attention to my depth. I would have to try to remember this with her. She was such a small woman. I could only assume she was small inside. When I slid down her throat, my brain short-circuited. Those beautiful, pouting lips were buried in my pubic hair. Her silky auburn hair is tickling my thighs. One look and my knees almost gave out. Thank god she had a bedpost to hand on to. The pressure from her finger on my rectum felt good. It was making that sensitive skin between my balls and ass tighten deliciously. But, Christ, when her tiny finger pressed inside, before I realized her intent, the jolt of electricity that ran down my shaft and gripped my balls made me dizzy. It didn't want to come that quickly. I'd wanted this first touching to last. But that jolt, god help me, it was all over. I just ejaculated so hard my stomach hurts and my balls ache now. I'm staring at the ceiling with my mouth hanging open like an idiot who just had a lobotomy! Say something, Fox, say something. She's waiting. I lay on my side watching the expression on his face. His eyes are wide. His lips are parted. He's still panting. I see awe and disbelief on his face. He shivers suddenly and turns to me and folds me into an embrace, his head in the crook of my neck. "Oh god, Dana. I'm totally stunned. That was so incredible. I've never experienced anything like that before in my life. I've never come that hard. No one's ever taken me . . . that deep." He sighs, "I didn't want to come that quickly." "It's O.K. Mul . . . Fox. I wanted you to come. I wanted to taste you." He groans and smiles. "You are so unearthly beautiful." "I am not, stop it." He shakes his head. "Dana, you have the kind of beauty that makes men do a double take and walk into a pole!" "Don't be ridiculous." "I'm not. I think that's part of what makes you damn irresistible." "What do you mean?" "God, you're so stunning, it hurts to look at you sometimes, and you have absolutely no clue how beautiful you are. There are lots of beautiful women in the world. But trust me, they know they are beautiful, and they use it." "Thank you. I don't agree, but I'm glad you think so." "Now lady, I'm not done with you yet." "I'm counting on it." He rolls onto me and proceeds to touch, lick or kiss every square inch of my body. He takes his time. And, god help me, I feel it. It's like he's worshipping my body. He tends to my face, lips, neck, breasts, stomach, hips. I feel so sexy, so beautiful and so loved. Everywhere he touches me, everywhere his lips suck my skin, his tongue licks and his fingers caress. I feel the waves of his love and desire wash over me. I've never felt it before. He wasn't lying. It's new, it's exciting, it's frightening, it's the most erotic feeling I've ever had. I'm in love with him. He stops at my feet and travels his way back up my legs. His face is inches from my wetness. He looks up at me and makes eye contact. I am panting with anticipation. "Dana, what you do to me. I'm hard as a rock again. I'm so hard, I ache." I shiver at his words, loving that I have this effect on him. With that, he sinks between my legs and his tongue laps at my wetness. I groan. Once again, like last time, he stiffens his tongue and slides inside me, lapping out my wetness. All I can do is whimper. Then he finds my bundle of nerves at the top of my lips and begins to suck on it. Two fingers slide inside me and begin massaging the walls of my vagina. Now it's my turn to be incoherent. He lifts his mouth briefly and my hips buck involuntarily, seeking the contact again. He whispers, "Tell me, Dana, tell me what you feel." And the lapping, nipping, and sucking begins again. "Fox, oh yes, oh god . . soo good . . ahh.. what you're...doing...to me ... it throbs ... it tingles...so hot...I want... I can't ... oh Fox, please, please ... oh I'm dying...can't take...aaahhh. I hear a scream as my orgasm trembles through me. I realize the scream is mine a few seconds later. The spasms are hard, intense and start in my vagina. From there my uterus and they ripple out over my abdomen and through my whole body, forcing my hips to buck, my back to arch, and my head to thrash back and forth. It is a long, keening, intense orgasm. I've never experienced one this intense and he hasn't even been inside me yet. I lay there trembling, feeling my muscles continue to quiver and grip his fingers. If I thought I was wet before, I'm really wet now. He slides up my body, dragging his skin against mine. His eyes are dark, his lids heavy. His look is reverent and holds a little awe, just like he described. His words come back to me. 'Reverence, mixed with respect, maybe a little awe too . . . he has to be in love with you . . . god help me, Dana, I'm so in love with you . . . you're The One, Scully.' He clears his throat softly. He whispers, "Your passion is so beautiful, you take my breath away. I've never seen anything so beautiful as what I just saw." I blush. "I've never felt anything that beautiful. God Fox, no one's ever made me . . ." "Tell me." "Made me come without ... without penetration." I look away, suddenly a little embarrassed at my inability to find the right words. He puts his fingers under my chin and turns my head to look at him. Penetration wounds so clinical. "I'm glad I could give you a first since you did the same for me." He smiles that masculine 'I'm so proud of myself' smile. For the first time it doesn't irk me. It's endearing. He deserves to feel good. Then I realize that his arousal is pushing into my thigh, throbbing. "Tell me what you want." He dips his head to seek my nipple again and desire rips through me again. My god, I just came and it's starting all over again. "Ahh, Fox, I want, I want, oh please . . ." Real coherent Dana. "Please what?" "Make love to me." "I am. That's what I've been doing." "Pleeeeaase, Fox." "Please what? Be specific." Tell him what you know you want! "Please, Fox, I want you inside me. God, please, bury yourself inside me." He gasps, his hips buck against my thigh. He slides his hands under my ass, gripping my ass cheeks and pulling them gently apart. I raise my knees and drape my legs over his hips. I can feel the head of his arousal teasing my lips. He is so big. I can't wait to feel him push inside me. I can feel my wetness dripping down my thighs. Christ, it's like Niagra Falls down there, an almost steady stream of warm fluid. I grip his shoulders. He is so hard he doesn't need to guide himself into me. He props himself on one elbow, one hand still on my ass, tilting my hips up. "Look at me Dana." I lock eyes with him. He slides into me, slowly, steadily, inch by inch. I groan low, feeling his head hit my cervix. "God, Dana, you feel like hot, tight honey, god you're so tiny. So small, so tight." My eyes flutter shut. I can't help it. I've never been this full. I relax and feel my walls stretching to accommodate him. It's been a long time. I look down, and pull in my breath as I realize he is not all the way in. Almost two inches of him is still exposed so I reach down and slide my middle and forefinger on either side of the base of his shaft. He moans. "Want it all." "Dana, you're so small. I don't want to hurt you." "Want . . . all of you." "Dana, no, listen, you can't. I'm used to this, to not . . . (he grins a little sheepishly, no arrogance) to not ... fitting." "No, Fox. I will take it all." I reach down with my hands and pull my knees up level with my chest, tilting my hips up. I spread my legs as far apart as I can. I feel a little silly for second, but then look up and see the look in his eyes. He can't believe I'm trying this. I take a deep breath, relax my whole body. "Do it." "Dana? I..." "Dooo iitt." He braces himself on both elbows, and lets his weight sink fully down onto me. His hips push gently and firmly and I feel him meet the resistance of my cervix and stretch it. I urge him on. "Push, hard." "I'll hurt you." "No, push harder." He takes a deep breath, lays his mouth on mine, and snaps his hips. I feel him ram in those last two inches or so, to the hilt. I can feel his pubic bone grind into me. I felt him push through my cervix opening up into my uterus. It feels like I have a log between my legs. I can feel him in my entire abdomen. It aches, but it's a delicious ache. He groans hoarsely, and I ...well... I scream, into his mouth. Then I scream his name as the unexpected orgasm rips through me. "FFFooooxxxx, ahh, god, yesss." I can feel every spasm grip his penis because I am stretched so wide. I think I blacked out for a second because my vision went black and then faded back in. I finally drift back to earth and look up. His fingers are biting in to my shoulders and he is gritting his teeth. I've never been multi-orgasmic. It was only a myth to me, until a few seconds ago. "Dana, don't move," he grunts out. I am still gripping my knees. My hips ache a bit, but I hold as still as I can. "Don't want to come yet," he sputters. I nod. Seconds pass. He finally lets out his breath and nods. I let go of my knees and my legs sink down and wrap around his hips. He still fits. My walls have stretched a bit and my orgasm has pulled my vagina back to accommodate him a little better. But he's in there tight, real tight, even after my orgasm. He looks shocked for a few seconds and then gives me that lop-sided grin again and starts to move. He pulls out a little and pushes back in, pulling a bit further out each time before sinking in again, allowing my walls to stretch slowly and adjust to his size. Finally, he pulls out until only his head is still inside me, and then sinks into me again, slow and steady, to the hilt. Again and again and again. His breathing is ragged. We are both moaning now. "Jesus, Dana, you feel so good, so wet, soootight, oh god, I've never felt ... Dana ...I dreamed... never thought...I'd be here...inside you...love you ... so much. Ahh..." A tear escapes the corner of his eye. "Tell me how you like it." "Long strokes. Deep, yeah, just like that." I realize he is being careful, afraid to hurt me. "I won't break, Fox. You don't need to be careful." I meet each of his thrusts as his pace increases a little. My hands slide up and down his back and cup his butt cheeks with my hands. I slide my hands around to his chest and push my thumbs across his nipples. Another grunt sounds from that. I look down now and watch those beautiful stomach muscles bunch as his hips do the work and push that enormous shaft in and out of me. He is pulling almost completely out and sliding back in. His penis is swollen, the veins bulging, glistening with my juices. He stops and looks down too. "Dana ... dear god ..." He levers himself up and puts his hands on my hips, pinning them to the bed and begins thrusting again. I stutter out, "I've already come twice, you don't need to wait for me." Then, "Oh yeah, so good. Yes, yes, hard, deep, harder, as hard as you can. Come for me." Something seems to snap inside of him at my words. His eyes look wild, his head is thrown back, neck muscles straining. His hips snap once, quick, hard and he begins to slam into me, so hard, so fast. But his strokes don't shorten. I'm so full, so stretched, his strokes are pulling the hood of my clitoris down and he's brushing over it with every stroke. I feel it building again ... I can't believe it. I start babbling again. "Oh my god...Fox...this can't...happen again....impossible...Ahhh...Fox...can't believe...oh god...you're going...to make me...come...again. Ohhh, god. Ahhh, Fox." "Yes, let go. Be one with me, Baby. Be one with me." I feel the first contraction and I shriek, "Fox, ooohh, god...I...looovvveee...yooouuu..." I go over the edge again. Did I say that out loud? I realize I mean it with all my heart. He feels my muscles clamp down on him again, hard. His head snaps down to look into my eyes, and he explodes. Hoarse, almost agonized cries come from the back of his throat as his whole body spasms in orgasm and he holds himself pushed into me, an arm now tightly around my waist. I feel the hot splash of his semen wash my insides with warmth. He finally stills and winds both arms around my shoulders as his body sinks onto mine. His nose is on my neck again, nuzzling my hair. He starts to roll away and I clasp him to me with my legs and my arms. "Stay." I whisper. "Dana, I must be crushing you." "No, I like your weight. Feels good. Stay a minute." He nods. We lay there still joined, breathing slowly returning to normal. He brushes my earlobe with his lips. "That is as close to heaven as I'll ever be," he whispers. I can hear the tears in his voice. He looks up and one spills over. I wipe it away with my thumb and suck it into my mouth. We kiss tenderly, the passion spent for the moment. I look at the clock. It's midnight. We've been at this for over two hours. A yawn overtakes me. He smiles and rolls off me onto his back, dragging me with him. I lay on top of his body and put my head on his chest. We are still touching everywhere, chest to chest, hip to hips, my legs on top of his. We've both wept tears for the overwhelming emotions finally let loose. My brain is mush. Being with her has surpassed all my wildest fantasies. Hearing her scream that she loved me had pushed me completely over the edge. It warps my mind that this small, beautiful, woman found a way to engulf all of me. I thought my heart was going to burst when she came as I sank into her completely for the first time. Then she screamed and I was sure I had hurt her badly, until I felt her walls grip me like a vice. I almost lost it right then. I hadn't seen that coming at all. She's very vocal. I didn't expect that either. At work, she's so reserved, so calm, so in control. I love it, her sounds, her words. They drive me crazy. I was still in shock that I was buried completely inside her little, wet, incredibly hot, unbelievably tight tunnel to the hilt. I'd been surprised she took as much of me as she did, before she insisted on trying to take all of me. No one has ever bothered to try. Not that I've had sex with that many women, but enough to know. I'm reeling from all the emotions and sensations coursing through my body. I'm so deliriously happy and overcome, I can't stop the tears that leak out despite my best efforts to keep them in. I wouldn't have mattered to me either way. Just the fact that she wanted to try, made me love her so much. "Thank you," I mumble. "For what?" "For making love to me. You were right. No comparison." His arms squeeze my waist. "Thank you, you gave me more than one first there too, you know? "I did?" 'MMM, HMM.' "Want to share it with me?" He chuckles again. "Well, I've never been... ummm.." "Never been...ummm. Very articulate, Fox." I give him back his own words to me earlier, teasing. He chuckles again, and takes a deep breath. "I'm trying to think of a tactful, not crude way to put this." "Fuck tactful, just tell me." He hoots with laughter. "You never stop amazing me." "Well?" "O.K. I've never been...uh, ...all the way inside...anyone. Almost, but not quite." His voice drops to a whisper. I could barely hear the next part. "No one has ever wanted or bothered to try." I look up and raise an eyebrow at him. "Go on." I'm so relaxed. I feel exhausted and exhilarated at the same time. I'm not thinking about what I want to say or how I want to say it for the first time in my life. I feel free, safe, and so loved. "Then again, I haven't been with that many women." "Right, I believe that one.' "I haven't, or I probably would have found someone who I ... fit ... with... I better stop before I get into trouble here." "I'll bet all your buddies' hearts bleed for you!" I giggled. "Tell me about the feelings." "Why?" "Because it turns me on to hear you put into words how I make you feel. Because I want to know every thing about you. What makes you feel good? What turns you on? What surprises you?" He is silent for a moment and then says, "You, you and you." "Huh?" "You...make me feel good. You...turn me on. You...surprise me." Now I'm the one with tears, happy tears. He leans up and licks my tears off my cheek. I grin like an idiot. "You still haven't answered my original request." "Which was?" "Tell me more about...the firsts, and what you feel." "You first." "O.K., I've never had an orgasm from oral sex, but I told you that already. Your turn." He grins. "O.K., No one has ever...uh...deep throated me. Your turn." I grin. We are playful now. "O.K., I've never come from just ... full penetration. Your turn." He is suddenly serious again. "That first orgasm I had in your throat, god, that was the most intense orgasm I've ever had. I came so hard it felt like I was turning inside out, and it wasn't stopping. I was in shock. I just kept ejaculating and ejaculating. Jesus, I'm getting hard just thinking about it." I felt it then, his half-erect penis between my legs, bobbing gently against my rear cheeks. "Your turn." "Hmmm, Mul...Fox. Sorry. It will take some time to get used to that." "It's O.K., no copping out with small talk," he teased, poking me gently in the ribs. "I've never come more than once in a ... session. Fox, do you realize that you made me come three times and two of them were before you ever took a stroke inside me? And they were ..." "They were?" "Powerful. I can't even describe it. Have we exhausted this subject yet?" I yawn again. "Not just yet. I have one more question." "Hmmm?" He placed his hands on my face and tilts my head up off his chest to look into my eyes. "When you had your orgasm..." "Which one?" I smile goofily. "Let me finish." I nod. "The last one. I heard you...say..." He swallows hard. He whispers, "I heard you say you loved me. Did you mean it, or was it just the heat of the moment?" He sounds like a lost, little boy and my heart turns over in my chest. I'm whispering again too. "Yes, I meant it. I don't know how it happened or when it happened. But somewhere, sometime, I fell for you. I started noticing your eyes and the way you looked at me. They made me feel warm. I started shivering when you touched me. I wanted you to touch me, but thought I shouldn't want it. You were my partner, my friend. I starting catching myself staring at your ass when you didn't know I was watching." He's smiling now. "Then I started to be anxious when we were apart more than a day or so. I wanted to be with you all the time. But I was so afraid to say the words or admit it, even to myself because there would be no going back. But knowing that you felt the same way, I didn't have to hold back anymore. I held back anyway until...until you just gave me that mind- melting orgasm. I couldn't hold it in any longer. Out there, in the living room, wanting you to touch me, the craving hit me so suddenly, but I was afraid to tell you, afraid to let go. Oh, yeah, and then there are the dreams." "Dreams?" I blush incredibly red, realizing how silly it is after what we just shared, and the fact that we are naked still. He laughs outright now. "You're blushing? You have to tell me now!" I giggle nervously. "Well... I would lay here at night and fantasize about what it would feel like to kiss you, touch you, feel you inside me. I figured that was a safe, secret way to take care of what I wanted with no risk. I could have my little fantasy and no one had to know. But it backfired. It just made me want you more. And then I would fall asleep and dream that you were...uh...that I was..." "You were?" "I was having sex with you." "No shit?" "Yeah. Well, anyway, in none of these dreams were you wearing any clothes. You were good, too. Lately I've been dreaming of you almost every night." I hide my face in his chest again and feel his contented chuckle rumble through his chest. "No kidding?" "No kidding, but..." "But? Uh, oh, there's a but." "In those dreams, you were not...ummm, quite so well endowed...and...but... God, I'm sooo bad." I was hiding my head again. "What? Dana, tell me! How bad?" I hesitate and then blurt it out. "About a month or so ago I started waking up from those dreams having an orgasm." I hear him suck in his breath and his penis gets hard again and teases my rear end. He must be trying to picture it. "But, uuh, I never felt like...like..." "Like?" His voice is husky. "Like I wanted to absorb you completely. Like I'd cry and die if you didn't push into me one more time. Like we were...one person, two halves of a whole. I felt that tonight for the first time in my life." I sighed loudly. "Still, though, those dreams were so erotic, I can get wet just thinking about them. It's starting again. Oh, god, Fox, you make me so wet." I can't believe I'm hearing this. I can't believe I'm hard again. Hearing that she fantasized about me, dreamt about me, woke up having an orgasm after dreaming about me! That I make her wet. I feel giddy. I want to make her dreams come true. What had she said? She wanted to hear what I felt. It turns her on to hear me put into words what I'm feeling. This is too easy. That is what she wants? That what she gets. I'd give her anything she wants. Anything. It's always been hard for me to say what I feel to anyone, except on the topic of my sister. What I think was easy, sure, but what I felt? That was tough. But now that my heart is on my sleeve and my feelings are out in the open, it's like a weight is off my shoulders. I opened the dam to the floodgate and now I can't stop it. I'm not afraid anymore. When was the last time that was true? Suddenly, she asks, "How long have you felt this way about me?" "A long time." "Give me a ball park." "Ummm, about five years, I guess." "Five years! Why didn't you tell me!?" "You're kidding, right? You thought I was a nut case. Besides, I did tell you once." "When?" "After the Bermuda Triangle incident when I disappeared and reappeared. I called you over to my bedside and just spit it out. I think you're response was, 'Oh, Brother.' You thought I was delirious, or joking. I wasn't either." "Oh, god, Fox, I'm sorry." "It's all right. At first I tried to deny my feelings because I knew you didn't feel the same way. You wouldn't allow yourself to feel anything for me, other than friendship. You were too much the professional. That didn't work, the more I tried to deny it, the more you drove me crazy." "Then what? After the denial." "Then I went through a period of trying to replace you. Or rather, replace my feelings for you with someone else. I thought if I could focus on someone else, my feelings for you would fade and transfer to someone else." "You're a psychologist and you thought that would work?" "Ouch. Not really, but I was desperate. And no, that didn't work either. I dated a little, quietly, but they were never as smart as you, as loving and forgiving as you, as understanding as you. And they certainly were never as beautiful as you. They weren't you, period." She was a little teary now, but I figured I might as well give her the whole scoop. "I'd get to that point in every date where you are supposed to kiss them good night. And your face would swim in front of my mind's eye. I wanted it to be you I was kissing. It wasn't fair to them. I couldn't let them believe something that wasn't true. I wasn't interested in a relationship with them." Her voice came out as a squeak. "Did you sleep with any of them?" I looked down at her and smiled, realizing the thought bothered her. "No. I came close once." "Close?" "Yeah, got all the way to the bedroom, even got naked." "And?" Her voice was a whisper. "I couldn't do it." "You mean use the girl?" "No, I mean I couldn't do it, literally. I couldn't even get excited. It was embarrassing. All I could think about was you. We weren't even an item and I felt like I was being unfaithful." "Really?" "Really." "what did you tell her?" "Before I could make a complete ass out of myself she pulled away and asked me, 'Who is she?'" "What did you say?" "I said, I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm doing here. You guessed right. I'm in love with someone else. This isn't going to happen. She was pretty good about it." "Who was it?" "Doesn't matter. I was honest with her in the end. Then, well, then I realized I was doomed. I was in love with a womanw ho would never look at me as a man. A partner, a colleague, maybe even a friend, but never as a potential mate. "You were wrong." "Yeah, but I didn't know that then. So I just tried to hide it from you. Didn't want to scare you away from working with me. I had to be able to see you. You were my life line. But it was hard sometimes." "Oh, Fox..." "There were a couple of times, right after I'd thought I'd lost you when I would think, 'life is too short.' I've got to tell her. She can't die never knowing how I feel about her." "I wish you had." "Me too. But then you got better and I would get terrified of losing you all together, losing your firnedship. I couldn't face that, couldn't risk it." "You thought I wouldn't work with you if you told me?" "Yeah. Dana, you never gave me even one little hint that you returned my feelings. I fyou had, I wouldn't have been able to control myself. I know I wouldn't have." "What changed?" "You gave me a hint." "What hint?" "You ogled my body at the front door." "I did not ogle your body!" I laughed. "Yes, you did. We almost had a repeat of the office." "I guess I did. That was your hint?" "That and in the office and later when you sat against me on the couch and...you didn't stop me." "Stop what?" "I touched you. I told you to stop me. You didn't. That was it. I lost what little control I had left. I had to try. I couldn't hide it anymore." I looked down at her. Her beautiful auburn hair was lying across my chest. I felt so relieved to have this all off my chest. I whispered, "Dana, do you know how much I need you? How much I love you?" She lifted her head and slid her hands up my chest and down my arms. "Take me again, Fox. I need you too. He groans and firmly rolls me over onto my back, pulls my arms over my head, pinning them above my head with one arm, and slides into me in one swift, seamless move. I moan and arch my back. He begins moving immediately, slow and steady. The urgency is gone. This is languid and slow and no less erotic than his fiery passion of earlier. I have lost all traces of sleepiness. He drops his lips to my neck and begins talking, softly, hoarsely. I can hear his passion, his respect, his awe, his love for me. He braces himself on his elbow of the other arm. He's so tall he can easily reach above my head to hold my wrists against the mattress with one hand. "God, Dana - out - what you do to me - in - I have no control around you - out - I just brush you - in - accidentally - out - and I can't breath - in - when you turn those - out - blue eyes on me - in - my heart races - out - when you touch me anywhere - in - to comfort me - out - or out of concern - in - even innocently - out -- I get hard -- in - soooo hard - out -- for you - in." He hasn't alternated his slow, steady pace. His words inflame me and I feel the tension coiling in my body. He moves a little faster now. A little harder. I can feel his testicles slap my butt gently with every long, deep stroke. "Can you feel it? - out - our hearts beating together - in - our breathing in sync - out - Can you feel it? - in - how much I love - out - you - in - how much I - out - need you - in --aahh - out - god - in - Dana, I - out - can't - in - believe - out - you - in - loovvve - out - in - mmeeeeeee...." His body shudders and I feel his warmth spray gently inside me and spread throughout my insides again. It sends me over the edge and my nails dig slowly across his back into his skin as I just moan his name over and over again as my spasms gently rock my body in an almost slow motion release. There is a silence for a moment. I whisper into the dark. "I feel it Fox. What I feel, I didn't know it was possible to love someone like this. I love you very much. Don't ever doubt it. I have no more doubts. Damn the consequences. I can't fight this anymore." I feel his gentle sobs as I run my hands through his hair. I gently pull his lips to mine and softly kiss him. He whispers, "I'm so overwhelmed. What did I do to deserve you?" I smile. "You don't know?" "Nope." "Dunce." "Hey!" "Just kidding. You were my friend, no strings attached. You've let me grow up, be me. You never judged me. You respected my brain, my opinion, even when you didn't agree with me. You loved me, Fox, completely, unconditionally, like no one has ever loved me, before you ever touched me. For pity sake, Fox, all I've done for nearly seven years is give you a hard time. I'm the one who doesn't deserve you." "Hardly. But you know what? I think we need each other. Who else could deal with us? I don't deserve you but I want us to be happy, Dana. It's been too long since either of us has been truly happy." "I've never been this happy ... ever." "Me neither. Oohh, it's 1:00 AM, we should try to sleep." "O.K." We fell asleep entwined. I slept soundly, deeply for the first time in ages. PART 4: (RATED NC-17) I wake up, no sense of how long I've been asleep. Habit makes me look at the clock, 7:00 AM I am on my stomach with my arm thrown across his stomach. I turn and watch him sleeping. His face is so peaceful, the corners of his mouth turned up a little. I realize I've seen him sleep many times, but never with a smile. My heart seems to swell in my chest. I draw my eyes down to the pulse in his throat, his broad shoulders, toned chest and see my hand near his navel. I can't help it. I start brushing my fingers through the springy light hair dusting his abdomen. A sleepy sigh sounds and his penis leaves it's resting place on his thigh and slowly swings up an out, half-erect, lying in the crease at the top of his thigh. A shiver goes through me and I feel my nipples tighten as I remember what it felt like to have him crammed inside me. I can't believe my thoughts have become this crude, but I can't help it. What is it about him? Now that I've tasted his passion, the passion I've admired for years. Well, more than tasted. I smile. I can't get enough of him, looking at him, touching him. For god sakes, I've had more orgasms in one night than I've had in a year, other than the dreams, and I'm still able to be aroused just by looking at him. It's Saturday. I'm unreasonably grateful he doesn't have to go to work. It seems this has all happened so fast. But no, not fast. This growing attachment, growing need, growing love has been growing up in both of us for over six years. All the dating, flirting, testing, learning has been done. Being away for a week, and my mother's pushing of the idea, as absurd as it sounded at the time, that I accept what was there for the taking, made me realize how much I missed him, and what was missing in my life. I just didn't want to admit it. Not going back on my word, sticking to my convictions was such a habit. I hadn't even considered a romantic relationship with him was possible. It was wrong. It was against the rules and that was the end of it. I was way too rigid in my thinking sometimes. He'd busted down that wall. What was missing? Love, affection, someone to come home to, someone to cook for, someone to make love to. Yes, I'd finally had someone make love to me. He was right, again. No one ever had. There was no comparison. Not even close. These feelings were a little scary. This would not be easy. We would have to go to work together. I had another week to figure out how to handle that, to talk about it. Not yet. I circled his still mostly soft penis and stroked lightly, barely touching. The response was immediate. He was getting steadily harder. He groaned. I glanced up, he was still asleep. I can't resist the urge anymore. I kneel down beside him, my knees almost touching his thighs. I grab the base with one hand, bend down and swiftly take him into my mouth. Silk over steel. He swelled to full in my mouth, groaned and woke. His hands wound in my hair as I traveled up and down his beautiful, rigid shaft, my hand squeezing and pulling at the base. "Oh Christ, God, Dana, what a way to wake up. Ahh, so good." Another minute of this and he pulled me up to kiss, slowly and thoroughly. I stroked him with my hand. I whispered, "Fox, please, I need you again." He gently flipped me onto my stomach, lacing his fingers through my left hand at the side of my head. His right arm snaked around my waist lifting slightly and he gently enters me from behind, sliding deep in one stroke. We moaned together, enjoying the feel of entry. His right hand moves up to grip mine and winds into my fingers like the left one. He slides in and out, his weight pressing my hips to the mattress. His thighs squeeze mine together and create more pressure deep inside as he strokes in and out. I realize that I am whimpering, a sort of warbling sound, "huhuhuhu, huuhh, huuhhh," with every stroke. "God, Dana, the sounds you make ..." He suddenly picks up the pace, his strokes are shorter and faster. His hips are slapping against me, the smacking sound loud in the silence of the morning. "I'm so close, baby, so close, you're so wet, so small, be one with me again, Dana, come on, come on, baby, come for me yeyeyeesss." We both go over the edge together. We are silent for a few moments. "Fox, it's like I'm starving. I can't get enough of you." He is chuckling now, his head against my shoulder blades. "What? What are you laughing about?" "Do I fit your profile now?" "No, thank goodness. You're young, you're handsome and incredibly sexy. You're my age, more or less, but the best part is I love you and you're mine, at least for now. God how I love you." He squeezes me and rolls onto his side. His smile is so soft, so happy. "I love you too. And I'll do my best to make you get enough of me and enjoy every minute of it. And I'm yours for as long as you'll put up with me." "Fox, I think Ophelia is cured." I hear him chuckle. "I hope so." "Hungry?" he asked after another hour power snooze. "Yeah, actually I am." "Got any eggs?" "Yup. Bacon and toast available too. I'm a regular restaurant." He frowned until he saw my smirk and realized I was teasing. He smiled. "My turn, I'll cook." "You cook?!" I asked incredulously. He grins widely now, knowing I am throwing his skepticism of my culinary skills back in his face. "Yes, I cook," he replied softly. "I haven't been a bachelor for all these years without picking up a few skills. Unless I wanted to live on hot dogs, beer and pizza, I had to learn to cook. Didn't think a steady diet of hot dogs would be good for my figure." He leaned over and kissed me on the nose and rolled out of bed onto his feet. He bent down to retrieve his boxers from the floor. "Wait." He stops and looks over at me, still bent over. 'God, he's got a great ass.' "Stand up." He does. "Why?" he asks. I whisper. "I just want to look at you." He gives me that sexy lop-sided grin and turns his body to face me. He is splendid in his nakedness with no shyness or modesty. I look at his narrow waist, his tight buttocks, his well-toned torso and large biceps, his muscular thighs. My eyes travel up and down his body, remembering the feel of those hip bones slapping against me. I grin, just enjoying the view. His smile faded and his eyes closed. Then I saw why. He was becoming aroused, just because I was looking at him. Oh lord. "Dana, if I don't leave now, we'll both go hungry." I giggled. "How can you possibly be excited after the night and morning we've just had?" He chuckled. "One of a number of mysteries I'd like to solve. I've never done it more than twice in one night." "No?" "No, must have something to do with being in love." I smiled. "O.K., love, go make us breakfast." We ate breakfast in our bathrobes. I had one of my brother's bathrobes here that fit him. We played Scrabble; I kicked his ass! We put on sappy music and danced in my living room. We laughed, we both just enjoyed each other's company. Then I noticed that there were messages on my machine and hit play. Beep - Agent Scully, Skinner here. I was trying to reach Agent Mulder last night to give him an update on the case I just assigned to him. I didn't reach him all night. His cell phone is turned off too. You don't know where he is do you? Sorry to bother you on your vacation. Anyway, if you see him, have him give me a call. Beep - Hi Dana, it's Mom. Just calling to apologize for being so harsh on you. I know you have your own life and I shouldn't interfere. But I love you and I want you to be happy. As happy as I was with your father. He would want that for you too. And I do really believe that Mulder loves you and you shouldn't let him get away. Anyway, I won't bother you about it again. It's your decision. I love you. Call me. Sometimes I wonder why I leave the "unlimited time option on my answering machine! I am blushing as I hit stop and mortified that he heard all that. "Whheeww," he whistles. "Guess you did summarize, you left out a few details about the conversation with your mother." "I, oh god, I'm so embarrassed. Why did you have to hear that? Thanks a lot Mom." My eyes were studying the carpet. He came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. He leaned into my ear. I was getting to really love it when he did that. "Don't be embarrassed. If that's what made you invite me over, then I'll be forever grateful to your mother. So tell me, was inviting me to dinner your way of checking out Mom's theory?" "No, I just missed you and wanted to see you at first. I didn't think her impression was valid. I didn't decide to check it out until you were here and asked me to recline between your legs. I couldn't stop wanting to touch you. Wanting you to touch me. I didn't know how to do it. How to start it. Isn't that pathetic?" "No, I was pretty much in the same boat." "And, I'd be lying if I said that incident in the office didn't shake me up and make me think." I was blushing again and knew he could see it. "Did it? What incident?." I elbow him slightly in the ribs, then reached behind me and stroke between his legs through his robe. "Oh, that incident." "Well, I knew I missed you. I knew I was attracted to you. But I didn't know..." "Hmmm?" "I didn't think you had those kinds of feelings for me. I mean, I know you were excited in the office, but I figured it was good old male lust, and nothing more. But, for me, I couldn't stop thinking about the way that made me feel. I guess I knew how I felt for a while now, but I couldn't bring myself to accept it or admit it. I'd have to admit I was wrong. But I thought, after you reacted to me that way, maybe...just maybe you weren't teasing me when you did these things...but I was so scared. I was scared I was wrong, Mom was wrong and I'd ruin our friendship if I made a pass at you. I would be devastated if I lost your friendship." "How did that incident make you feel?" "Scared, warm, excited." "Why scared? The possible rejection factor." "Yes." "I can't believe you thought I'd reject you. I was sure you knew how I craved you and just chose to ignore it." "Possible rejection and because of what you were making me feel. You make me so vulnerable, like no one ever has. Do you know how frightening that is for me? If you were just playing with me, teasing me, I could make an incredible ass out of myself if I acted on it, besides getting my heart broken." "I'll never break your heart. Warm?" "Yeah, warm, safe, and a little giddy. I can't think when you're mouth is anywhere near my neck." "MMMMM, Excited?" His hands were gently caressing my stomach. One slid up to my right breast and cupped me, kneading gently through my robe. I hummed in the back of my throat. My nipple was instantly hard. He pinched the pebble-hard nipple gently. "This kind of excited?" he asked. His breath was hot on my neck. "Ahh, Fox, yeess," I hissed. "When you play with my ears or my neck, it does wicked things to me. I'm so sensitive there." "I'll keep that in mind. What kind of wicked things?" His voice was soft, a little hoarse. "Ooohhh," was all I could get our for a second as his hands untied my robe and slid up to cup my bare breasts, both of them. "This...your breath is so hot, ahh god, why does it go straight to my breasts?" "Straight to your breasts, huh? Tell me." "Yes, my nipples get so hard. My breasts feel heavy and then they ache. In the office, the second your breath hit my neck my body reacted. I was sure you would feel my nipples through your shirt. They were so hard." "I may have registered that briefly, but I'm afraid I was too concerned with holding you against my chest so you wouldn't feel my hard-on" It was my turn to laugh. "I did feel it." "Yeah, after you squirmed away and landed on it!" "I didn't mean to!" "I know, but I figured at that point, uh, after you made me swallow a moan, there was no point in trying to hide it. I was mortified though." "I didn't know what to think. You let me up and did nothing to acknowledge it. You ignored it, so I tried to also." "What could I say? Gee, Scully, I know you just felt my hard-on poking you in the ass, now you see it. See you for dinner and by the way, thanks for the hard-on I have to try and get rid of before I arrive at your place tonight!" I was laughing now, so was he. It was great to be able to laugh together, poke fun at ourselves and our embarrassment. It hadn't even been 24 hours but it seemed so long ago. It was now 3:00 PM. "What about Skinner?" "He can wait. I need a shower, Dana, and I should probably go home and get some clean clothes." "O.K." The disappointment at his leaving must have been evident in my voice. "Well, you could come with me." "To the shower or your apartment?" "Oh, ho," he chuckled. "How about both? I don't intend to leave you alone and out of my sight until I absolutely have to. I'm still not entirely convinced I'm not dreaming." "If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up." "Me neither, I'll kill the bastard that wakes me up." He released me. "Last one in is a rotten egg," he chortled. With that, he took off at a trot for the bathroom. I followed, loving this playfulness. God, I really hadn't know what I was missing. It almost seemed too good to be true. But I wasn't prepared to look at it too closely yet, lest it disappear. I just wanted to enjoy it for now. We relaxed under the hot spray of the shower, and both washed our hair. He exclaimed over my cinnamon scented shampoo as he discovered the source of my scent. You'd think he'd discovered Atlantis. Deciding it wasn't a 'too feminine smell', he used it as well. We soaped each other's back and our hands teased each other's bodies. I stroked him firmly with my hand. I lost it when his hand went between my legs with a bar of soap. He dragged it back and forth between my legs. Our humor died as our excitement mounted once again. Before I knew it, my arms were braced against the glass door and the side of the shower. My legs were wrapped around his hips. His arms were wrapped tightly around my waist. He lifted me up and his mouth latched onto my nipple, as I sank down onto him. We both made incoherent sounds as he lifted me up and down upon his shaft. I marveled at his strength, holding me up while standing. I angled my body back away from him, and we both watched him sliding in and out of my body. He is so big. I threw my head back and groaned through my release. My clenching muscles sent him over the edge. He yelled my name as his hips pumped up into me a final time and he clutched me tight around the waist. His face was so beautiful when he had his orgasm. His head was thrown back, eyes closed, throat muscles working around his yell as water streamed down his body. I slid down his body when he finished clutching me and we rinsed off again before exiting the shower. How erotic was having sex in the shower? I'm just coasting along on a euphoria cloud, waiting for the rain. God, I can't get enough of her. Something about watching that tiny, shapely body perched on top of my erection nearly sent me around the bend. Her weight, slight as it is, allowed her to sink down - all the way - again. I don't know if I stretched her now so she can take me easier but I slid all the way in, no problem. No resistance. But still, she is incredibly tight. Because she is so small with slender hips, I look enormous sliding into her. I'm good size, but I look huge because she is so small. I still can't wrap my mind around it. It was such a turn-on to watch her sink onto my engorged sex. I am still wondering how I've managed to get hard so many times in less than 24 hours. I've never had this kind of stamina or recovery either. But mostly, I can't believe she loves me. She loves me! I'm truly am waiting to wake up. We drove to my place and I changed my clothes and we watched a movie I had rented, all cuddled up on the couch. I had planned on watching the film myself but this was much better. We ordered Chinese take-out and ate it on the couch. We went to bed early and curled up together. Dana Scully is in my bed. Her skin is so soft. I knew that from touching her cheeks and her neck on occasion. I always wondered if it was that soft everywhere. It is and I can't stop touching her and reveling in her softness. Dana Scully is in my bed! We are both tired though and agree to just snuggle up, entangled and try to get some sleep. It feels so right to be spooning her, my body wrapped completely around her. I feel a surge of protectiveness for this passionate woman in my arms. I stare at those lips that I've fantasized about for so many years. The lips that I longed to kiss and suck on, that had driven me insane. Lips that had unbelievably been wrapped around my sex. God, that mouth. A mouth that had swallowed the biggest load of cum I'd ever produced. Dana Scully is in my bed!I had to think of something else before she started thinking that's all I wanted. I was aroused again, but ignored it. She seemed willing though so far. She was starved as I was. There was so much passion in her. I'd known it was there, somewhere beneath the veneer of the tough, smart, doctor/FBI agent trying to prove herself to the big boys. She never had anything to prove to me. She fascinated me from day one. As our friendship and trust grew, I saw the passion, carefully hidden behind her science. I just never dreamed that passion could be for me. My last thought before drifting off to sleep was, "I can't believe this enchanting, erotic creature is in love with me." PART 5: (RATED NC-17) I woke up spooned by Fox in his bed. I could feel his chest warm against my back. One arm was snug around my waist. The other was under my neck and my head was cradled under his chin. His leg is pinning mine to the bed. I glanced at the clock; 6:00 AM, Sunday morning. My slight motion must have woke him. His hand slowly started to caress my stomach. His arm under my neck slid down to cup my right breast. He gently pinched my nipple. I groaned as I felt myself gush wet and my lips swell in response to his pinching my nipple. They were so sensitive. Involuntarily my back arched into him, my butt rubbing into his hips. I felt his erection rise from semi-erect to hard and slip up my cleft. He pulled back and I felt the head of his penis lodge between my cheeks and push gently against my rectum. Sharp, almost painful shocks of arousal ripped from my breasts, down my body and into my clitoris and made it throb. I moaned and he sucked in his breath. I bit back another groan. "Ahh, Fox, you make me so wet." "How wet?" "Feel." His hand swiped through my pubic hair and cupped me, his middle finger slowly slipping inside, deep. His fingers are so long. "Ahh, jesus, Dana," he groaned when he felt how swollen I was. I loved that I could make him moan. It sends shivers down my spine. "Oh, yes, touch me, god Fox." "Tell me," he whispered. "I'm so swollen, I ache." "Where?" I take his fingers and guide it to my clitoris. "Here, and inside." He pushes down hard on my clitoris, pushing from the top downward and I feel his erection at my entrance. He grasps my hip and slides into me. He strokes deep, once, twice, three times. I moan and feel my juices squirt out of me around his hardness. I feel positively wanton. "Oh Love, I can't get enough of you." He called me Love. He pulls out slowly. My hips strain forward briefly at the loss. His penis slid back from between my legs and I push back into his hips and I feel it again. His rock hard erection, pulsing against my rectum. I reach back behind me and grasp him firmly at the base. He chokes out a slightly strangled moan. Suddenly, I want him in there. I've always wondered what it would be like, but never had the courage to try. Also, I was worried that my partner would think I was disgusting or perverted. Now, the idea is such a turn on, I can feel my wetness leaking out of me and running down my thighs as my nether lips tingle at the thought of it. I know he will not be disgusted. His penis is slick with my juices and I press him gently but firmly against my rectum. He sharply sucks in his breath. "Dana, what?..." I nudge a little harder, steady. "Ahh, Dana, are you sure?" I push a little harder. I feel my sphincter tighten against the impending intrusion and then relax. "Oh Jesus, Dana. I don't want to hurt you," he croaks. "I want this. I want to try. I want to take you in every hole in my body. Every way possible." "You know I can't tell you No." "Let me control the entry," I gasp out. "Oh, O.O.Ka,K.," he stutters. He uses his other hand to scoop up my wetness and lubricate me. He slowly slides a finger inside my tight hole and works it around until I relax, then two fingers. He slides his hardness into my slick vagina, once, twice and emerges coated in my juices. Then he laces his fingers through my hand that is under my body. I grasp him firmly again in my hand that is swung back behind my back. I take a deep breath, and ... exhale slowly as I back myself into him and feel his silky, wet head pop inside the ringed muscle. There is a sharp, quick, pain, then rivers of warm tremors as the muscles relax by degrees as I continue to push back onto him by millimeters, so slow. The feeling is indescribable, incredibly delicious. He is so big, so wide and sooo hard. He moans, loud, low and grasps my hip. I can tell he is exercising extreme control to hold still and not push. His breathing is really heavy, really ragged. I realize mine is matching his, breath for excited, ragged breath. "Daannaa, ohh god, I don't want to hurt you." I push steadily. "But, ahh, god, ... so good, ... so tight...ahh, FUCK! Dana, sorry, sorry, that word -" "It's ... O...K., say it. You can talk dirty. Say whatever is in our head, whatever you want." "Ahh, Fuck, Dana, you're soooo tight, so tight, jeeezzus. Please be careful. Don't go too far." He could barely fit into my vagina, I know I can't take him all here. That's O.K. He's about half way in. My body is trembling from the indescribable sensations coursing through my body. I am sweating. I squeeze his shaft hard. I have a moment of panic but then my squeeze causes his hips to buck, quick, jerk-like and he slides in almost another inch. My whole body shudders and I melt into a puddle of tremors and loose muscles. I squeak in surprise. "God, Dana, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He starts to pull back and I slap my hand back against his hip. He freezes. "Sorry, baby, god, I'm so sorry." 'Did he just call me baby?' "Shhh, I'm fine." "Are you sure?" "Yes, but you're in far enough. Move now, slowly." "You sure...Yeah?" His voice holds wonder and fright. "Please." "All right, you tell me if it hurts." "I will, go slow at first." "K." He backs out about an inch and slowly slides back in. He is gripping my hip tightly. He backs out about two inches and slides back in. A long, low moan starts way in the back of my throat as he continues pulling out a little further each time and sliding back in. The sensations are beyond anything I've ever known. Wave after wave of tiny, continuous muscle ripples go through my body. Each time he slides in, I feel him jar the back side of my clitoris. Nothing has ever given me the continuous shudders like this. I start to help by grasping my ass cheeks and pulling them apart as far as they will go. Then I push back into him to meet his careful thrusts, my hips moving almost involuntarily. There isn't even a hint of pain as my body continues to stretch to accept him, just an incredible tightness and the warmth of the muscles stretching. He stops and quickly hoists me up onto all fours, staying inside me. He pants, "It will be easier this way, I think." I move up a little and grip the bar of my head board for leverage as he slides a pillow under my stomach. He starts moving again. "Faster," I pant. I am groaning continuously and trembling. He is gasping and moaning alternately. He picks up the pace just a little. The sounds he is making fill me with euphoria. He goes a little faster. His hands slide up and down my back and over my ass so gently. He's so afraid of hurting me. I have a brief thought that I might look like I'm having convulsions. My muscles are quivering as they relax. I'm rapidly going out of control. I'm tired of control. I want to be dominated. To hell with gentle this time. I want it rough. I want to be FUCKED! Almost from outside, I hear myself. I don't' even recognize my own voice, so hoarse and deep and wild. "Yes, yes, go, just fuck me, keep going, .. oh god, Fox, .. so good, . harder, .. faster, .. oh yes...TAKE ME. Take control. Do it now! " He does. He just continuously goes a little faster and a little harder, a little deeper with each stroke. He is now pulling out until just his head is inside and then plowing back in. A little more than half of him is inside me now. I hear myself shouting, "Slam into me, ...hard as you can! Oh yeah. Stuff me full! Fuck me haaaaarrrrd, Fox ! Fuck my ass. I want it rough. Ram it in. Ah, god, your cock is so huge, so good. Oh yeah, fuck it hard." I hear a little strangled scream from him in response to my words...and he goes a little faster, a little harder, a little deeper. Each stroke, a little faster, a little harder, a little deeper. A minute goes by where all I hear is our ragged breathing as he continues carrying out my wishes, and sinking into my body, totally dominating me. I am almost in shock from the sensations. Suddenly I register that both of his hands are gripping my hips tightly, and his beautiful, lean hips are smacking into my ass. I feel his balls hitting my wet lips and my clitoris. My mind goes off the beam as I realize oh my god, he is all the way in. All of that beautiful, impossibly long, incredibly hard, thick, heavy cock is stuffed into me, slamming into my ass to the hilt like a battering ram, fucking me so hard. And nothing has ever, ever felt this good! "Yeesss...keep...fucking me...just like that...with all of you...so deep...so hard...don't stop... Foooxx, yeah, be rough." I scream. I sound demented. I'm having one slow, rippling orgasm that just keep fluttering through my body with every stroke. And he is too. He is slamming into me now, hard, fast, deep strokes. My hearing comes back suddenly and I can hear him. "Dana, can't much .. longer. Ahh, god, ... can't believe... this is happening,... Dana, baby, ... you, god, ... love you, ... can't believe ... I'm fucking ... your ass, ... you're too ... tiny for this...baby...was sure you were ... too tiny...can't believe you ... are taking ... all .. of .. me, ... never felt anything ... this tight ... Jesus, Dana, ... never been this .. haaarrrd, ... ssooooo fucking ... hard... it hurts, ahhhh chrisssst, ...ahhaaa, FUCK, DANA,, FUCK, DAAANNNAAA." He is pulling out until just his head is inside and ramming that enormous cock of his back into me in long, hard, fast, deep strokes, right to the hilt. It feels like he is all the way up to my stomach. I'm splitting apart. I might die from this. I don't care. Lights explode behind my eyelids and I hear us both scream as a violent clenching orgasm takes over the small rippling one. We scream again, not a name, just an endless blending of our screams as the endless tremors wrack our bodies. He has leaned forward, his torso over my back and is gripping me around the waist, as I feel his hips whacking my back side in short strokes now in an almost staccato rhythm as he comes, pumping squirt after squirt of hot semen into my ass. He has no control over it. God, I can feel it even more this way. His semen is hot, really hot and my bowels feel like they are on fire. Delicious fire. My ass is clenching him so tight. I can feel every convulsive throb of his huge dick and a hot wash of his cum as it jettisons into me. I have no idea how long the orgasm went on, or how long we just sank into the tremors afterwards. When our breathing finally quieted, he slowly pulled himself, still semi-erect, from me, holding my ass cheeks apart gently. I whimpered at the loss. His cock is laid on my back, reaching almost up to my lower back. God, he was in so far. He slid down into a spoon position and wrapped me tightly in his arms. This is beyond anything I could have imagined in my wildest, most erotic dreams. She keeps bending my mind with the things she wants, and I can do nothing but go along for the ride, gladly. I'm so afraid of hurting her but then she coaxes me with screams and dirty talk and I end up completely losing any semblance of gentleness or control. My cock is so hard it hurts, hurts deliciously. Her ass is gripping me like a vice, so impossibly tight. I can hardly stand the pleasure. I'm dizzy from it. I can hardly stand to watch as her tiny body, once again, opens to accept me. But I can't pull my eyes away. God save me, every stroke brings me closer to losing control. Got to keep control. Go easy. Then I hear her screaming voice, crazed, ragged, wild and begging me to be rough, dominate her and fuck her ass, hard and fast. Her crude but erotic words in that wild, desperate voice make my mind snap and I finally lose all control, all restraint. My body reacts to her words without the permission of my brain. I see myself move my hands from her back to grab her hips tight and begin pounding into the tightest orifice of her body. Delirious again as I stare uncomprehendingly as my cock plows into her over and over, sinking, sinking, deeper, deeper with every wild, out of control stroke. I can see her sphincter iris tighten as I back out and stretch open again as I slam myself back inside. I feel like I'm going to split her in half, but I can't stop or even slow down my pounding as I hear her continue to wail and beg. Then I'm all the way in, slamming into her to the hilt. And I feel her contractions gripping me. I should have come by now, she's so tight. But her sphincter is like a tight cock ring, keeping me incredibly hard, but preventing me from coming prematurely. I scream and my own stream of nonsense issues from my mouth. I am floating. I think my head just disconnected from my body and took a seat nearby to watch. I'm aching, impossibly hard. I feel like a steel rod being milked by a vice, a hot, gloved vice. My universe is between my legs right now. I am out of my mind to be fucking her this way. And we are fucking this time. I am out of my mind to be cramming my rock hard cock all the way into her dainty, heart-shaped, little ass. I should be too big for her. There must be divine intervention here. All I can say now is: Fuck, Fuck, Fuck and scream her name as I my hips start wailing her with short strokes and I come. And come and come and come. My balls are pulled up so tight, I wonder if you can even see them anymore. My guts are turning inside out. And my cock is on fire. Then her muscle contractions escalate and grip my cock so tight it feels like she will cut it off. But strangely, the tolerable pain makes my orgasm more intense and each of her spasms milks me for another jet of cum, and another and another. I can barely hear him when he speaks. "I'm lost Dana. I'm so lost in you. You are so incredible. Can't believe that just happened. Thought my body was going to explode. Didn't know that much pleasure was possible. I'm so in love with you." "I love you too, Fox. We just...fit." 'Well said.' We drifted off to sleep. PART 6: (RATED NC-17) We managed to get through the rest of Sunday without groping each other until later that evening. We had a picnic in the park and then caught a matinee at the theater. It was some romantic chick flick, the kind I've always hated to sit through. Didn't bother me a bit today. Must have been because they always reminded me of what I didn't have, what I thought I would never have. We wandered around the streets of D.C., window shopping, holding hands and grinning at each other like two love sick high school kids. We had dinner at a cozy French restaurant and laughed over the escargot. They are great, but only if you don't stop to think about what you're eating. I saw the men's heads turn as we crossed the floor to our table, my arm around her waist, my hand resting possessively on her hip and I felt unreasonably proud that she was with me. With me, as opposed to just joining me. We went back to my place and I packed some clean clothes and we stumbled back to her apartment. My face actually hurt from smiling so much. I realized that I hadn't had much to smile about in a long time. It was long overdue. Putting aside for the moment, the surreal, mind-blowing sex we've had in the last 3 days, today, I just enjoyed being with her. We'd done all these things before, movies and dinner. But it was different now. It was relaxed and easy. We were really sharing it. I was a little worried about work, but it hadn't come up. I hoped it wouldn't be a trial for her. I had no idea how she wanted to handle it and was afraid to ask. I didn't want to be the one to break this mood of wonder and delight that was following us around. But I knew we would have to talk about it and come to an agreement. I'm lounging in my sweats without a shirt on her couch. I rest my head on the back rest and close my eyes. She had gone to the kitchen to fix us a snack. She's taking a while. I suddenly smell the unmistakable smell of warm chocolate. I'm about to ask her what she's doing when she walks into the living room. I look up and the words die in my throat. She's wearing black thigh high stockings and a lace garter belt. Nothing else. The cross she always wears around her neck is glistening in the glow of the candles she lit on the coffee table. She has two bowls, one with strawberries and one with melted chocolate that she holds out to the sides of her body. She stands quietly, a quirky smile on her face. Did I mention the garter belt and stockings were all she's wearing? No bra, no panties, no shoes. Her full breasts are standing at attention, the peaks stiff with goose bumps. My eyes travel from her feet to her thighs. Her red curls hold my eyes. The ends of the little hairs between her legs are shining a little with her wetness. I've forgotten how to breathe. She waits patiently looking like a painting out of one of my most lurid fantasies. I drag my eyes up to her breasts and lick my lips. My mouth has suddenly gone very dry. Is she real? Does it get any better than this? I'm still waiting to wake up. We've both been starved and now awakened. It seems she is as insatiable as I am. We're making up for lost time and enjoying the alternate universe that seems to have sprung up around us, excluding the rest of the world. I felt my groin tighten moments after she appeared. As soon as my brain registered what I was seeing, I was erect, almost painfully. I'm tenting the front of my sweat pants. She tips her head and stares pointedly at my crotch. I feel her eyes travel up my bare chest. When our eyes meet, she is wearing a wicked smile, fully enjoying my stunned, speechless reaction. You'd think I'd be a bit cooler by now. You'd think the sight of her naked perfection, the shock of it would have dimmed at least a little after what we've shared. Nope. "Breath, " she commands around a low chuckle in her throat. "God help me" is all I can whisper. "You say that a lot lately." Her tone is teasing. I smile. "I need all the help I can get. Baby, you are going to kill me. Can you die from too much pleasure?" "Not unless you have a weak heart." "Not me. Good thing, although this could induce heart failure." She smiles widely, licks her lips. "The chocolate will get cold if I stand here all night." She places the bowls on the coffee table, close to the edge and sits on the couch, reclining into the armrest opposite me. She folds her legs up Indian style. My heart is racing. Her breasts are pushed up into the air as she reclines against the arm of the sofa. Her sex is exposed to me. Peeking between the auburn curls, her lips are pink and swollen and wet. I move to go to her but she holds up a hand to stop me. I retreat to my side of the couch and watch her, hungry with anticipation. She reaches over and plucks a strawberry from the bowl and dips it in the chocolate. She holds it a moment in front of her mouth, letting a drop or two of chocolate drip onto her chest. I watch it fall and then moan deep in my throat as she slowly begins to lick the chocolate off the strawberry. Her tongue laps and then swirls around the fruit. It's like her tongue is on my penis. I feel the answering shivers in my shaft each time her tongue laps. I never thought of food as erotic. I'm changing my mind. She bites into the fruit, stopping with it between her teeth, her full lips pouting around the edges. She sucks a little, bites it off and chews slowly. She hums, "HHMMMM." I see the wicked twinkle in her eyes as my breath hitches. "I didn't know about this sadistic side in you," I whisper. She just smiles and repeats the process with several new strawberries. She has let several blobs of chocolate slide onto her chest and between her breasts. Just when I think she can't do anything more exciting than this, she retrieves a blob of chocolate from her rib cage with her index finger and slowly rubs it around and over her hardened nipple. She moans and tips her back into the armrest. I can't breath again. She repeats with the other breast. They are now both covered in chocolate and she is smearing it around with the fingers of both hands, one on each breast. "Dana, please..." I croak. She shakes her head 'No". Now she just dips all four of her fingers into the chocolate, retrieving a couple teaspoons worth of chocolate. She locks her gaze with mine and slowly brings her hand down between her legs and smears the chocolate on her curls. "Holy shit," I hiss. She maintains eye contact with me for a moment and slides her middle finger through her hair and sinks her finger inside herself. I'm dreaming. My lord, she is masturbating in front of me. I am suddenly very uncomfortable and stand up. She grunts, but then nods as sees me pull my sweats down. I hadn't put any underwear on either. I recline again, one leg up on the couch, one foot on the floor, facing her again. My erection is standing proud, throbbing rhythmically. She has fastened her eyes on my crotch and continues to slide her finger inside herself, retreating and dragging her fingers up and over her clitoris. Loud sighs are coming from her now in regular intervals. I can't stand being still anymore. I wrap my hand lightly around the top of my shaft and run my thumb back and forth over the head, spreading the precum that was staining my sweats moment earlier. Her eyes go wide and she gulps. Those blue orbs are like a Medusa. "Yeesss," she hisses. Her fingers of her free hand are pinching her nipple now and rolling the hardened bud between her thumb and forefinger. "Aahhh, Fox." Her breathing is heavy now. "Keep touching yourself. I want to see." As much as I want to jump on top of her and sink my tongue into her chocolate curls and suck out her wetness, I comply. She has surprised me again. I pump my rigid shaft in hard, firm strokes, flicking my thumb over the head at the top of every stroke. We are both making unusual sounds between gasps now. I am in a haze, watching her pleasure herself and knowing that watching me is getting to her as much as she is getting to me. I wrap my right hand around the base of my shaft and start squeezing in time to her fingers slipping in and out of her tunnel. My left hand is still pumping. I lean forward a bit and feel the nubby texture of the couch fabric scrape against my balls. I groan and increase my pace with her. This is too much. I grab my shaft with both hands, one on top of the other and start thrusting myself into my own hands, forming my own tunnel. As I tighten my ass muscles to pump my hips forward, my sack scrapes lightly on the couch fabric causing alarming tingling to run through my groin. Her eyes haven't left my hands. Her two fingers are now furiously frigging her clit and she is making those sounds again. Those warbling whimpers. My pace increases again and I can't stay silent anymore listening to only my ragged breathing and her shuddering whimper. "Oh, Dana, you're a goddess, so beautiful, so exotic. Ahh, lord, I'm so hard for you, sooo hard again. What you do to me. Ahh, Christ, love, my balls are so heavy, so heavy. She responds to my need for words, knowing how they inflame me. The same way mine do her. "Fox, I'm so wet, so wet. Have mercy, you're so beautiful, so sexy, ahh, love, you're so big... it drives me crazy...just remembering you inside me. Crazy just to look at you. Yes, keep sliding into your hands, yeah, that's it. Good god, you need both hands. Pump yourself hard, pump hard for me, ooohhh, I'm so close, so close, aaahhh, Fox, yeesss." I watch as her eyes go wide and the flutter shut as her orgasm washes through her. I grunt as I follow right behind her. My eyes are filled with the sight of her beautiful face, flushed with passion, her huge blue eyes heavy with arousal, the wet pouty lips telling me to pump myself for her as my cum spurts out in jets and splats onto my chest. I cry out her name and fall limp, my spent erection throbbing softly in my hands. She is slow to move but looks up and sees my chest. "Got any tissues?" I grin. "Don't need any." "Huh?" She flings herself to her knees, crawls between my legs, drops her head to my chest and begins licking my semen of my chest. All I can do is moan endlessly and watch in fascination as she licks, hums in her throat and swallows as if she's eating a delicacy. She finishes the job thoroughly, briefly sucking my soft penis into her mouth and swirling her tongue to clean it up. She looks up and gives me that 'Cheshire Cat' grin. She is very proud of herself. I can't resist. She shrieks as I grab her by the waist, lift her and push her down onto her back, leaping to my knees to straddle her. "You will pay for that." "Promises, promises," she quips. I give her my best 'you are in trouble now' look. Can one person stand so much pleasure without inducing spontaneous combustion. It seems I'm spent, exhausted. Then, one touch, one tease, one look and it starts all over again. I've never been this adventurous, this aggressive or this demanding. I've never been this insatiable. It's like he turned on a faucet and someone removed the knobs. I can't shut it off, this flood of emotions, desire, excitement, giddiness. I never realized giving pleasure could be so intoxicating. I'm in love. He is by turns gentle, rough, stunned, out of control, wild . He's a kaleidoscope of moods and I love every one of them. I knew he would be a good lover. I'd heard the talk. I didn't know he would be this good, that he would make me delirious. The way looks at me with wonder makes my heart feel like it's going to burst. My modesty is gone. It went down the drain with my fear and confusion. He loves me. This wonderfully loving, incredibly sexy, very intelligent , passionate man loves me. What can I do but love him back? I feel light headed with the power of his excitement and knowing that I am the cause. This dream will have to end. I know it. But not yet. Watching him pump his huge erection and watching him come was incredible. I'm delirious. First, he licked the chocolate off my breasts, suckling and laving my nipples giving equal time to both of them. He kissed me so tenderly, spent moments just gazing at me and then slipped down to the floor, spinning me around to recline on the couch, my hips propped on the edge. He went torturously slow as he licked the chocolate from my pubic hair and then explored every fold, gently and thoroughly. Oh my god, he is lapping the cleft between my ass cheeks, gently and cupping my ass and pulling the cheeks apart. He leaned over and stuck his face in the chocolate bowl, coming up with a blob on his tongue and returned to me. He pulled my legs up over his shoulders. A jolt of intense pleasure ripped through me as he stiffened his tongue and pressed into my rectum. Holy shit, the chocolate is still warm. I'm groaning and running my hands through his tousled hair. He keeps poking into me, swirling his tongue and lapping up the chocolate from my ass. I think I'm gonna pass out from the waves of pleasure. He stops and looks up at me. "Stay with me love, I'm getting inspired." His low, husky voice is so sexy. I'm having a little trouble breathing. He called me love again. It sounds so good. "I'm, I'm almost afraid to ask," I gasp. He chuckles a satisfied little sound, snatches a large strawberry from the table. "I'm going to die. He is rubbing it in my folds, over my clitoris and into my wetness at the mouth of my vagina. I can only stare at him as he brings it to his lips, and slowly sucks my wetness off the end. "Christ, Fox, you're killing me." He smiles and repeats the process. Then a third time. By now, I'm squirming. "Please, Fox...oh please..." "Please what?" "I need something...I don't know...you're driving me insane." "What do you want?" "MORE!" He bends down and nudges my opening with the strawberry. I gasp. He reaches over and dips it in the chocolate and returns. Good lord he is carefully pushing it inside me. Help me, it's sliding in and he is pushing two long fingers in behind it. I feel myself swell and release my wetness that fizzes quietly as it leaks out around his fingers. He is murmuring, "Dana, you are so beautiful, so perfect, so wet. Can you feel how swollen and slick you are?" "Yesss." Another strawberry follows the first, and another and finally a fourth. "So exotic, like fruit. You taste like tangy honey. Good with strawberries." I'm incoherent now as he drops his head between my legs, slides his big hands up to cup my bottom and pulls me hard onto his mouth. He has sealed his mouth over my lips, snaking a hand out to pinch the bottom of my lips closed with two fingers... and he is... sucking...so hard. I cry out as I feel a piece of fruit burst through my lips and into his mouth. "MMMM," he hums. He moves to the bud at the top of my lips and pushes his top teeth down on my clit, raking down over it as ... oh ... he's chewing, slowly, carefully and scraping my clit with ever bite. "MMMMM, delicious. I love the taste of you." I begin to hoot and pant. "Whoooh, Whoooh, oooh." His lips close around my nub and he sucks slow and hard. His index finger and thumb slide into me as my orgasm hits me. My spasms grab his fingers as he fishes around and pulls out the second strawberry, popping it into his mouth and descending on my nerve bundle again. The tremors had just subsided and they racked me again. I am so inflamed and sensitive from coming that I hiss, "No teeth." He nods and gently lips and sucks me as he finishes retrieving and eating the other two strawberries. I orgasm each time he reaches inside me. Back to back, slow, shuddering orgasms. He seems so in control, so unaffected until I pull his head up with my hands on his face and look into his eyes. His pupils are dilated, there is a fine sheen of sweat on his hairline. His lips are swollen. He is breathing heavily, slow, deep, shuddering breaths that almost match the pace of the orgasms I just had. His hands come up to rest on my thighs. They are trembling. A smile slowly spreads softly across his face. "You're killing me Dana, I'm vibrating. Lord, you're so incredible, so beautiful. And I can't believe it..." "Believe what?" I ask. He kneels up, takes my hand and guides it between his legs. I lean forward and grasp him gently. Holy shit. He is so hard. I slide from the bottom to the top, reveling in his rigid silkiness. His eyes close and he sucks in his breath. His eyes open and they are filled with tears. "How can I keep wanting you like this?" My eyes sting with my own tears in response. "How can I need you this mu...much?" I can't believe you lu-love me." "Shhh," I hiss as I stroke him gently. I want to comfort him, reassure him. He seems frightened. Is he frightened by his own feelings or by me? I'm not sure. "Fox, I can't believe that you love me either. Nothing has ever been this right, felt this right. I can't stop touching you, looking at you, because I'm afraid you'll disappear, and I'll wake up and find out this was all a dream. Do you know what that would do to me?" "N-No." He is staring at me intently. "My heart would shatter into a million pieces." I pick up his hand and turn it palm up, brushing my fingers over his calluses. "Do you know where my heart is, Fox? He smiles a sad smile and slowly touches my chest below my left breast. God, I love him so much. Why didn't I realize it, admit it? Why did I fight it? The reasons seem trivial now. "No." He scrunches his eyebrows together and does that adorable 'purse his lips' thing. I hold his hand in mine and put my index finger in the center of his palm. "It's right there, Fox. In the palm of your hand." He sniffs a little and silent tears start falling down his face. I whisper, "And I'm begging you not to break it." He sobs and clutches me to his chest, wrapping his arms around me tightly and burying his head in the crook of my neck. "I'll never break it Dana, I promise. It's the most precious thing in the world to me. If anyone's heart is going to get broken, it's going to be mine." We were silent for long moments, just holding each other, breathing together, enjoying having our arms full of each other. He finally stood up and swung around to sit on the couch. I swung into him and cuddled up under his arm, laying my head lightly on his chest. He closed his eyes and hummed. I snuggled up closer and lightly scratched my nails through his pubic hair. He smiled lazily. I reached up to stroke his arousal keeping my touch light. I don't deserve her. I don't deserve this kind of pleasure, but I can't turn away from it either. I want to give her everything. If I thought she'd say 'Yes', I'd buy her a ring tomorrow. She would be better off with some smiling handsome executive or doctor with no haunting obsessions, and no one gunning for his career. I've never cried in front of anyone but her before since I've been an adult. I cried when she was sick, I was cried when my father was killed and I cried when my mother died; with her. And just now when I couldn't contain my love for her anymore. I don't know what to do with it. I couldn't express it, so I cried. I always knew it was O.K. to cry if she was there. I knew she was the one person who wouldn't think less of me, or think I was weak. Regardless of what she deserves, she loves me, really loves me. I'm beginning to believe it. It's unbelievable, it's incredible but it's true. Isn't it? My brain hasn't caught up to my heart yet. I keep catching myself questioning it. Her heart is in the palm of my hand? Quite the other way around if you ask me. I'm relaxed now. Her fingers are fluttering around my sex. Her touch is so slight, I might not notice except for the burning and throbbing response of my body. I look at her and she seems fascinated. Her big blue eyes are open wide, staring at her own hand as her fingers tentatively touch me, up one side of my erection and down the other, teasing the head and watching it twitch and react to her touch. I feel her shift and have no time to react as her stocking-clad thighs slide over mine to straddle me. I grunt and without another thought, she perches on top of my engorged hard on and slowly but steadily descends. She stops near the bottom, exhales forcefully and pushes down, engulfing me again, her hips grinding into mine. We both groan. She leans in and kisses me softly. I shiver as her tongue darts out and wets first my top lip and then the bottom lip. Her hands are exploring my chest, my neck, my stomach. "I need you so much. It scares me how much I need you." She's stroking my arms and sucking gently on my lips. God, my body is just melting under her gentle ministrations. She whispers, "It feels so good to touch you, so good to have you inside. Christ, you stretch me. Feels so delicious. I could look at you all day. Your body fascinates me. You're so graceful, so sexy." Her hands travel everywhere as she strokes and squeezes and continues whispering endearments. She slides up as far as her thighs will lift her and slides back down, steady and slow in her rhythm, just reveling in the feel of it. "Your skin is so warm. I love to feel your muscles tense when I touch you." We've been fairly serious up to this point, but then I lose it when she says, "Do you have any idea how utterly perfect your ass is? I've wanted to do this for so long." With that she leans over, slides her hands under my rear end and grabs my cheeks, one in each tiny hand and rhythmically squeezes. The tension is too much. I'm grinning like an idiot again. "Just checking to make sure it's still there. I want to play with it later." I glance at the perfectly serious look of concentration on her face, and I can't resist. I bark out without thinking, "Dana Scully has the hots for my ass? Who knew?" The tension breaks and I start laughing. I sound a little hysterical. I have no idea why it strikes me so funny. God, she thrills me. It's contagious and she joins me, laughing at me laughing. Her eyes tell me she got the double entandree, the literal one and the metaphorical one. She crushes her lips to mine. Our tongues dance with each other. I cup her breasts and her breath hitches. I massage her chest as she resumes her lift and settle rhythm as her laughter quiets to soft chuckles. She's kissing me again, reaching back to rub my sacs gently with the fingers of one hand. I can't stay still anymore and her slow pace is driving me wild. I being to thrust up into her each time she descends. She moans into my mouth as I fill her. Every thrust, she is moaning into my mouth. I feel the vibration shoot straight to my groin. I move my hands to her hips and begin guiding her, holding her in place while I thrust up harder and faster. Each time I do her stockings slide over the outside of my thighs, teasing the hairs with a delicious hiss. Her breasts are hovering in front of my face and I latch onto her hardened nipple and suck, slow and hard, the way now, I know that she likes it. Her soft moans graduate to loud groans and she starts to babble again, always a good sign! "Fox, oh, you feel ssooo good, uh, the way you fill me. The way you stretch me. Ooooh, I can always feel you so deep, oooo, so deep. You're always soo hard, so hard, so good. Ahh, yes, suck it hard, just like that." My hands slide back to cup her heart shaped ass. She is pressing her hips forward now grinding her sex against me with every thrust. Before long we cry out together and sink down to lay on the couch. Healing Ophelia PART 7: (PG-13) I woke up cradling her against my chest. Her leg was thrown over mine, her head on my arm, tucked beneath my chin. I don't think I've ever been this happy in my entire life. I don't recall ever feeling this content. It's 6:00 AM, Monday morning and I have to get up, but I'm loath to disturb her. I slowly extricated myself from her and slid out of bed. She mewled in protest, but I tucked the covers around her to keep her warm and trotted out to the kitchen. I couldn't leave yet. I picked up the phone and hit the Speed Dial 2. My cell phone was Speed Dial 1. That little fact made me unreasonably happy. The phone rang 3 times and then he answered, "Skinner here." "Sir, it's Mulder." "Mulder, where the hell have you been?" "Taking care of some personal business, I was away from my place for most of the weekend." "I know, I've been trying to reach you." "Sorry about that. Listen, how big of a hassle would it be for you if I took a week off? I have three weeks accumulated." "Now?" "Yeah, now, this week." "Umm. Well, the case I gave you needs some immediate attention." "It's not an X-File." "I know that but your profiling skills are needed on this one Mulder. Most of the folks in behavioral unit are tied up." "Well, then could you send the computer file over by e-mail and I'll do a profile and send it in for their use." "From home?" "Yeah, why not. Then they can get started on it, have something to work with, and I can take the rest of the week off." "What's going on Agent Mulder?" "Some personal things I need to iron out. Came up suddenly." "Uh, huh. This wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that Agent Scully is on vacation, would it?" "Uh,..." There was silence on the line. "Alright, Mulder, we'll do it your way. You can't concentrate and you aren't worth shit when she's not here anyway." "Thanks, I think." "Your welcome. I'll e-mail the stuff over right now." "Oh, sir?" "Yeah?" "Umm, can you e-mail it to Scully?" Silence again. I hear him exhale a breath forcefully. "Yes. Is that where you are?" "I'd rather not say, sir." "Well, O.K., you know what? I'd rather not know." "Thanks again, sir. I really appreciate this." "You owe me one." "Yes, sir. I'm sure you'll find some heinous task for me to perform to make it up to you." He chuckles. "You bet I will. Bye for now." "Yeah, good bye." The line went dead. I went back to the bedroom and just stood watching her sleep for a while. I had a whole week off. God, I hadn't taken a week off in over six years. I crawled back under the covers carefully and wrapped her in my arms. She mumbled, "Time for you to get up yet?" "Shhh, no, go back to sleep." "K." I wake up and look at the clock. Some habits die-hard. 9:00 AM. Oh, god, 9:00AM!! "Mulder, Mulder, wake up!" "Huh?" "It's 9:00, you have to get up. You are already two hours late. Skinner is going to be furious." He is smiling lazily at me. "Mulder, this isn't funny, you can't keep doing this." He gives me that feral grin. "Yes I can." "What are you talking about, you have to..." "I took the week off." Silence. "You what?!" "I said I took the week off." "You never take a week off." "Just did." "When?" "About three hours ago. Got up, called the boss and told him I wasn't going to be in this week." "You're crazy. Why?" I got the 'you can figure this out' look again. "Me?" "Yup. Not ready to leave this little universe just yet. I do have to whip up a profile though for the Behavioral Science group." "The case you had when I visited on Friday?" "Yeah." "You don't have anything from the file, you'll have to go in anyway." "Nope. He's e-mailing me the information." "Oh, well, then, we'll need to go to your place and get it." "Nope." "Mulder! Would you just tell me the whole story?" "He's e-mailing it to you." "Me?! You told him you were here?!" "He guessed." "Shit." "He didn't seem upset about it. Told me I wasn't worth shit when you weren't there anyway." "He did NOT." "Did too." "No kidding?" "Yup." "Mulder, you were calling him at 6:00 AM! He's going to think you spent the night here. "I did." "I know that! But I don't want him to know that!" "Well, he can't know for sure." "So now what?" "What would you like to do Agent Scully?" "I'm hungry." "Breakfast?" I nodded. "My specialty." "Let's go out." "Out?" "Yeah, you know, put on some clothes, go down to the diner a few blocks down, sozzle coffee and eat breakfast." "I have to put clothes on?" "Well, I'm not really prepared to share you yet. I'd rather you didn't start handing out free shows." "Really? Are you getting possessive of me Agent Scully." I growled and leaped up to straddle him. I leaned in for a kiss and he captured my mouth in one of those thorough, slow, lazy kisses that melts my insides. I came up for air. "Yeah, I might be." "Well now, I guess I can live with that." I was quiet for a moment. "We need to talk about work." He sighed. "I know. I was putting it off." "We probably shouldn't." "Let's talk about it over breakfast, not here in bed." "O.K." "Shower with me?" He looked hopeful. I chortled at his expression. "If you promise to behave yourself." "Not a chance. I'll never look at showers the same way again." Breakfast was fun. I was finding such delight in doing the simplest things with her. Everything was new, just because she was with me. She been with me on many occasions in the past, but she'd never been with me. In public, she was such a lady. But she'd never been my lady. It was hard to reconcile this proper lady with the tiger in my bed. Her many facets continued to intrigue me. She was slowly opening up. She started telling me personal things about her life, her family, her interests outside of work. It was enlightening. She knew almost everything about me already. She knew my family, my history. I'd really had no other interests besides my sister and work, until now. I supposed there were some things she didn't know. Mostly, though, whatever she didn't know pertained to my feelings about her, my fantasies about her. Those could wait. I wanted the work discussion out of the way. Then I could enjoy the rest of the week without that looming over our heads. "So, about work," I began. She sighed, "Yeah." "We should decide how we want to handle this, as long as ... "As long as? "You want this to continue. "Of course I do! You didn't think this was a fling, did you? If I wanted a fling, I could have done it with someone a lot safer. My face must have fell hearing those words. "I didn't mean that the way it sounded, Mulder. "I know, but it's true. "I just meant someone who I didn't work with, without those complications. I wasn't referring to anything else. "O.K., well, no, it certainly isn't a fling for me either. I think you know that. I just wanted to make sure that you were sure. "Yes, I'm sure. As weird as it may seem, I've never been more sure of anything in my life. For all the fear and misery I put myself through worrying about it, now, it seems, O.K. "You don't know how happy that makes me. I never dreamed any of this was possible. "Me neither. Ironic, isn't it? All this time we wasted. "I know. I thought of that too, but I don't want to dwell on 'what ifs.' I want to think about a future...with you in it. God, that's sounds surreal when I say it out loud! She smiled, that sexy smile where one corner of her mouth turned up a little higher than the other. "So, public or private? "Meaning? "Do you want to be my lover in private or in public? "Public holds some interesting possibilities. She blushed as she realized how I'd intentionally misinterpreted her. I was leering at her in mock consideration of the possibilities going through my head. "I meant, do we keep this to ourselves in general or do we let people know that we are together? "Are you talking about work or otherwise outside of work? "I guess they are separate. "Depends, whatever you want to do, Scully, I'll go along. Really, I don't care either way, just so long as you stay with me. I don't care about the ramifications at work. I used to because that was my only excuse to spend time with you. And I knew I wanted to keep you in my life as much as possible. And yes, I want to keep working together. I think we make a great team. But as long as you are my ... girlfriend? She chuckled. Well, the rest doesn't seem important anymore. "Girlfriend, huh? "Is that the PC term nowadays or is there another one? It's been so long, I wouldn't know. But I don't want to go around introducing you as my lover. That would be tacky." "I like 'girlfriend', girlfriend works for me. "Well then, girlfriend, what do you want to do about this new situation?" She was silent for a few moments. "Well, I feel the same way you do." "That's a first." She laughed. "Stop it! I don't want to hide from everyone or anyone. However, I do want to keep working together. Sooo...I guess we should be circumspect and professional at work. To be open at work would be like handing them a reason to split us up. I don't want to do that. They have been looking for a reason all along. I don't want to give the bastards the satisfaction!" Her voice was rising in volume as she continued. "I would go crazy if you were taking off on some case with another partner, or me with a new partner. I don't think I could handle it. Us going in separate directions all time on different cases. I want to be with you, all the time, not just in between cases." I gave her my best 'you are amazing look.' "Do you have any idea how much I love you? Any clue?" Her smile was radiant. "So, what about when we're not at work?" "Hmmm. Well, I don't want to hide but we should probably be careful in D.C. We could run into a lot of people we know from work around here and it would only take one gal to see us behaving inappropriately and blow the whistle." "Gal?" "Yeah, one of the many female agents or secretaries that has the hots for you." I'm laughing out loud now. "What are you talking about? Every single guy in the place wants to take you out but your reputation for adhering to the rules holds them back. They are always asking me, 'What's it like to work with such a beauty? Telling me what a lucky bastard I am to have you as a partner. How did I get so lucky? Me, Spooky Mulder. Not fair. And, my personal favorite, 'How in the hell have you kept your hands off her for nearly seven years?' I never know how to answer that one, because I have no earthly idea." "You're crazy. You're making this up." "Most certainly am not." "Well, neither am I. God, every time I heard one of the mewling rookies talking about your body parts like you were a hunk of meat, I wanted to slam them in the kisser!" I'm grinning from ear to ear. "So possessive, Agent Scully, that you would contemplate violence on my behalf. I like it." I paused. "So what body parts?" "Never mind." "Oh no, spill it." "You don't want to know." "Yes, I do." "Why? So you can get a swelled head?" "Not me. That's never going to happen." She chuckled. "Besides, I don't believe you anyway, that's why you won't tell me. You are the one making up stories!" "You don't believe me? Alright, Mr. Nosey but don't say I didn't warn you." I raise my eyebrow in question, waiting for her answer. "O.K. I've lost count of the comments I've overheard about your perfect backside and what they'd like to do to it." "No way." "Yes, way. Shall I catalogue them? Let's see. Questions I've gotten. 'Have you ever seen him with his shirt off? Lucky bitch. What's he hiding under those suits? Don't you want a piece of that? You guys are more than friends, aren't you? Is that ass as perfect as it looks unveiled as it does with pants on it? Oh, yeah, then there are the speculations about the size of certain parts of your anatomy. How big are you? Can you use it well? How they would love to borrow it for a night." I could feel the blush creeping up my neck and I looked away. Was she serious? The anatomy thing, there was only one person who could have started that rumor. Diana. Damn her. Now Scully is chuckling and enjoying my obvious embarrassment. "Well, well, Mulder. Never thought I'd see the day when some sexual innuendo would rattle your cage. "Well, that's pretty sacred ground, Scully. Don't you think? "I warned you. "Yeah, you did. Got me. So let's drop this now and pick up where we left off. We got side tracked here waving flags for the mutual admiration society." "Maybe I should try to remember all the things I've overheard or been asked. I rather like the state this discussion puts you in." She is suppressing a giggle. "Scully..." I tried to put my best warning into that one word. "O.K. Where was I? Oh yeah. D.C. I think we should just play it by ear on the outside. Be careful in D.C. When we are out of town, well, then..." "O.K., sounds good to me. Basically, if no one related to work is around, all bets are off. If there's even a chance of something or someone getting into the work loop, be discreet. Does that cover it?" "Yes, O.K." "O.K. "So what about Skinner? "What about him? "Do you think he knows? "No. He suspects, but he's in the 'what I don't know won't hurt me category'. Besides, he has no proof and he knows how tactless it would be to ask me. After all, I have behaved myself for nearly seven years, despite the rumors. He knows we have a weird relationship. He doesn't understand it but he respect it." "Weird how?" "Well, to him, yeah. We are closer than most partners. We are more involved in each other's personal lives because of what we have gone through. He knows we are each other's best friend and confidante. But, he also knows that our convictions and beliefs are fundamentally different." "Not so much anymore." "Yeah, but he also knows how professional and level-headed you are. So, even if he doesn't quite trust me to behave, he counts on our differences and your professionalism to keep me from crossing the line." "Level-headed, huh? If he only knew. Do you know this or are you just guessing?" "I'm guessing, partly. But truthfully, I really think he's on our side...in all things. If he were to discover we were..." "Lovers?" "Lovers. That sounds so weird, still. Good weird. But weird. Yes, anyway if he found out, I think he would keep it to himself." "Well, whatever happens, we'll deal with it. If they split us up though, I'd leave the bureau." "You would?" "Yes, if I can't work with you, I don't want to be an agent. After you, nothing else would measure up." "Thanks. You really feel that way?" She nodded. "What would you do? Open a medical practice?" "Too tedious and time consuming. No, I think I'd probably try to become a medical examiner or something and work regular hours doing autopsies. Then I could take time off and travel with you if you had to split with some new partner to parts unknown." "You've really given this some thought. "Yes. Some of it before we...before this weekend." I smile in response. She is so cute in her awkwardness. It is a rare thing to see and I drink it in with my eyes. Thoughts of me can make her shy. That knowledge just gives me a warm fuzzy." "God, how I wish that I had known." "Yes, well, you said it earlier, Mulder, we just have to look to the future." "Fox." "Oops. Fox." "Actually, it really only matters to me when I'm touching you." "Yeah, we'll have to be careful not to slip at work." "Yeah, that could be tough." I raised my O.J. glass. "A toast, to the future, Dana. I really feel like I have one now." "To the future, Mulder. Ophelia is definitely cured." Healing Ophelia PART 8 (RATED NC-17) He had spent Monday afternoon compiling his profile on the killer the Behavioral Science Unit was pursuing. He wanted to get it out of the way so that we could enjoy the rest of the week with no work hanging over his shoulder. The week went by fast. We hit all the museums in D.C. We rented a bunch of movies neither of us had the chance to see. We ate out at a different restaurant every night. We. Us. It was a new concept for both of us. It made things a little strange, but new and exciting. We'd been squiring each other around for nearly seven years, but we had never been an item and it changed the feel of everything we did together. Since neither of us could boast much of a social life in the past seven years, we both had the money put away to do these things. We took turns paying for our outings. He knew I would find his insistence on paying for everything insulting. So, after a token objection, he allowed me to hang onto this vestige of independence. It was one of the things that I loved about him. He really did see me as an equal. He never saw me as less than or the weaker sex. And, in keeping with our first weekend together, we made love every night before going to bed, and sometimes in the morning. Finally, it was our last night of freedom before going back to work. We decided to eat in. He surprised me by running out to the grocery store and returning with three bags of groceries. Although he used almost every pot and pan in my house, he produced a meal fit for royalty. French onion soup and tossed salad with vinegret dressing was followed by veal Parmesan and linguine. He even did baked apples with cinnamon for dessert. After stuffing ourselves silly, I lit a fire in the fireplace and we relaxed on the couch with coffees in hand. We assumed our now favorite position for the couch with me reclining between his long legs. He was silent for long moments and we just enjoyed being snuggled up on the couch. The tension of our first attempt at closeness in the position forgotten. "So, want to tell me about this profile you did?" "You probably don't want to hear it." "Yeah, I do. The perp is serial killer, so I know the evidence is probably gruesome and unsettling." "To say the least. Whoever this is, he's a sick individual." "He?" "Yeah, most of them are and since all his victims are women, married between the ages of 30 and 45, I can safely assume he's male." "Let me guess, 25-35 years old, loner, bad history with daddy, works way below his potential, has a high I.Q., and is methodical, probably has obsessive compulsive disorder and lives in the area of his victims. How am I doing so far?" "Pretty good. Where'd you learn this stuff?" "I read John Crawford's books, Mind Hunter, Obsession, and Journey into Darkness. The Behavioral Science Unit can be loosely related to forensics since forensics often evaluate the evidence that they use to make up the profiles." "I'm impressed." "Don't be. Criminal psychology has always just been something I had a morbid curiosity about." "Something else I didn't know about you. Well, I think he's probably in his 40s or 50s, and his bad history is with mommy, not daddy. He lives near his victims but not in the same town. Probably somewhere fairly remote. Otherwise, you're dead on. Maybe you missed your calling, Scully. You would have done well in psychology instead of cutting up dead people." "Nah, not my bag. I can only second guess what's going on in other people's heads for a while, then I start getting cranky. I'm a science girl, I like absolutes, and there is nothing absolute about psychology." "How have you put up with me for all these years?" "You're the exception." "Why? Come to think of it, you second guess me all the time, continuously, for the last seven years!" "I do not!" "In work, you most certainly do." "In the beginning maybe. But I've learned to respect your instincts and you're hunches. They may not turn out to be what you thought they were, but they usually lead to something significant and germane to the case." "Hmm. Instincts and hunches are rarely absolute." "I know. I've had to back off on some of the convictions I've held sacred all my life, because of you." "I'm sorry." "Don't be. It made me grow up. It made me work harder. It made me realize life isn't an imperical math equation. You've taught me that not everything in the universe can be explained and executed with military precision. Sometimes we have to make a leap of faith, trust your gut and go for it. "Never thought I'd hear that from you. You know, they've hung med school students for less!" "Me neither. But in an ironic way, it's strengthened my faith. I was never a good Catholic. The dogma and hypocrisy of the church didn't jive with my convictions in science. But learning that not everything in life is black and white, right or wrong, good or evil, I had to rely more on my faith in god and an ordered universe. I had to trust that everything happens for a reason and I don't necessarily have to understand it to work with it. Also, that things work out the way they are supposed to. If I can accept that, I don't have to always know, 'why.'" "Interesting theory. Maybe that's my problem. My religion has always been 'truth' and figuring out the 'why' of everything. I didn't need hard facts to pursue a line of evidence or questioning. But at the end I am looking for definitive answers." "There are more things in heaven and earth Horatio...." "I think we've both learned a great deal from each other. And if your theory is correct, then we don't need to pine over 'what-ifs' as regards our relationship. It happened when it was supposed to happen. Everything we shared and learned from each other built up to that moment. That one moment when I risked touching you. That one moment when I asked to make love to you." I fluttered my tongue in a good imitation of a cat purr. He chuckled and began to place soft kisses on my shoulder, moving up my neck, lapping his tongue over where he kissed, and finally breathing into my ear and running his tongue around the shell. My body's response was immediate. I felt the shivers, the now familiar tightening of my nipples and heaviness in my breasts. I moaned. He growled a mock growl that brought a smile to my lips. I purred again in response. "Dana, you're like a drug. I'm afraid I'm addicted to you." "I can live with that." "Can you now? I haven't shocked you yet with how much I want?" "No, It's hard for me to believe, but I'm getting used to it fast. I think this has been the happiest week of my life so far. I would think I would be the one to have shocked you." "You did, but I was, am, delighted. I love you so much. I can't even put it into words. There are no words." "I know. We can show each other though." "Over and over?" "Yes, over and over. Let me show you." I stood up and took him by the hand leading him into the bedroom. He reached for me, but I stopped him. "My turn to show you." "You already have." "I want to again. Slower this time. I want to explore." "I'm all yours." I let her take control and set the pace. She kissed me slowly and thoroughly. Her lips created tingles of fire as they worked down my neck and over my shoulders. She unbuttoned my shirt, kissing every inch of skin she exposed, nipping, sucking, laving her way down my chest. My shirt was removed and she repeated the process down both arms, ending by sucking each finger into her mouth and swirling her tongue around each of them before moving on to the next. My breathing was ragged now and my heart was beating hard. For every suck on my finger I could feel a mimic sensation in my shaft. She would gently restrain me each time I reached for her. She slid around to my back and ran her hands up and down the sides of my spine. She stepped away briefly telling me to stay. Then I felt her bare breasts against my back, and her bare legs against the back of my thighs. Her hardened nipples moving over the muscles of my back and making them ripple with anticipation. Her hands made their way to my belt, her arms around my waist. The buckle was deftly undone, along with the button at the waist of my jeans. I gasped and then let loose a moan as her hand slid over my erection while unzipping my jeans. My jeans were removed as she knelt and licked my thighs, the back of my knees and my calves. My underwear were shed, and she gently led me to sit on the bed. Continuous incoherent groans escaped me as she ran her hands over my thighs and slid her mouth over my hardness, laving me with her tongue, sucking slow and hard, creating a slow, powerful throb in my shaft. Then she moved up and down, her silky hair brushing my thighs and belly. I'm going to come if she keeps this up. "Dana, please, I need you so much," I managed to gasp out. She gently maneuvers me onto my back, raising my arms above my head and showing that she wanted me to grab the vertical bars of her headboard. Her slow, steady pace never varied as she ran her hands over my forearms and biceps. She's kissing me again, sucking my tongue gently into her mouth, our tongues then dancing around each other. I melt when she does that. She pulls back and licks my top and bottom lips, wetting them thoroughly before sucking on my bottom lip. I am shuddering now, my hips straining upward involuntarily, seeking contact with her warm wetness. She stares into my eyes for long moments. Her pupils are dilated, her lids heavy, her lips swollen and her breathing rapid. I am glad to know she is as affected as I am. Finally, she levers up and straddles my lower legs, leans over and slides her body up mine, pulling her breasts over my groin. My hips twist of their own accord and her tongue darts out to lap up the fluid leaking from the head. The way she hums in the back of her throat as she swallows my fluids drives me crazy. It's like she's eating a delicacy. I can feel the blood rushing through my veins and our panting breaths joining together in an expression of the passion we share. I close my eyes and savor the sensations. Our passion seems to be building each time we are together like this. It hasn't calmed or dimmed. My desire for her, it is as strong and urgent as it was the first time I laid my lips on hers. A mystery, one I don't wish to solve, just revel in. I feel her slight weight shift and I look up to see her staring at me. Her hands are on my chest, her wetness laying atop my shaft. Her lips are parted, her tongue sliding over the bottom of her top teeth as she contemplates her next move. Her ministrations have been torture, sweet torture. But I am losing my ability to stay still. My cock is heavy, throbbing and beginning to ache now from being hard so long with no relief. I whisper, "Dana, please, I need to be inside you, you've made me ache." She responds to my request, but still in slow motion, rising up, taking hold of my throbbing hardness with one little, white hand. Holding me in place, she perches atop the head and rubs me back and forth between her wet nether lips. We both moan. I feel her wetness coating the head of my shaft. She is so warm there. She finally utters her first words since she told me to let her love me slow and explore. "Fox. You will never know how much I love you. You complete me like no one ever has, like no one ever will." I shiver at her words and feel my chest get tight and my eyes sting with unshed tears. She slowly, centimeter by centimeter, lowers herself onto my shaft, her eyes never leaving mine. Near the bottom, she braces herself on my shoulders, leans forward slightly and pushes back, embedding me to the hilt in her tight, hot, wet tunnel. She sighs. I groan. I watch her eyes flutter shut for a moment as she grinds her pubic bone against me. I hear her murmur, "So deep, you fill me so full, I can feel you so deep." My hips strain upward trying to relieve this relentless pressure. Her breath hitches and she begins to lift herself up to the top and lower herself back down. Once again her pace is slow. Her breasts are gleaming above me, the pebble hardness of her nipples standing at attention, begging to be suckled. "Dana, I need to touch you, please." She nods and I remove my hands from the headboard where they held the bars in a death grip. I keep her slow pace, sliding my hands over her hips, waist, stomach and making my way towards my goal. "Silk, your skin is like silk," I whisper. I grasp each globe of her perfect breasts in each hand, lifting and gently kneading their fullness. She's making those low moaning sounds that go straight to my groin. She embeds me inside her again and begins to rock gently back and forth, her beautiful backside brushing my swollen, aching balls each time she rocks backwards. I pinch her nipples and roll them between my thumb and forefinger. She groans and hisses, "Yes, squeeze hard, Fox, harder, yeah, just like that." Her pace increases as she begins to undulate her hips in a slight circular motion. She leans back and I raise my knees slightly and tilt my hips up, pushing into her as far as I can go, feeling myself slide a little deeper into her as my hips tilt up. "Oh, god," in a surprised tone was all I heard as her walls began to contract and massage my. She reached back and gripped my thighs. My hand sank to her clitoris and I ran my thumb hard over her nub as the orgasm hit her. I saw a flush rush up her stomach and chest as her head was thrown back and she cried out, her eyes wide, "Fox. Ahhh. Fox." She was so beautiful, her tiny body towering above me, flushed, her breast thrust out, her inner muscles urging me to follow her. I clenched my jaw tight, curled my toes and contracted my groin muscles in an effort not to come. Her spasms stopped and she gazed at me with an almost bewildered look on her face. Then she smiled, "I didn't expect that. Wow." I couldn't take my stillness anymore and grabbed her hips, bucked my hips and quickly flipped her onto her back. She gave a little surprised squeal but didn't protest. I put her arms up to grasp the bars of the head board as she had done to me. I pulled out of her and she mewled in protest. I held her hips down with both hands. I needed to regain control and that wasn't going to happen if I was inside her. I leaned in and kissed her and made my way down her body. As she'd done to me, reveling in the way she began to squirm. I positioned myself on my knees, between her legs and slid my thighs wide and to the side of her hips, pulling her legs up and resting them on my shoulders. Her eyes were wide with anticipation and she licked her lips. I smiled at her and firmly grasped her waist just above her hips, my arms on the outside of her legs and placed myself at her entrance. I slid just my head inside her and pulled back out. Then I went in a little more and pulled back out. I continued to tease her this sway, sinking a little further each time until her head was rolling back and forth on the pillow, her auburn hair splayed around her head and across the pillow. She pleaded, "Fox, you're killing me, please." I pulled completely out, looked her in the eye with my erection resting between her swollen lips and then gripped her hips and drove myself into her to the hilt, hard, holding her pelvis from the top of her hips crushed against me. She cried out as I began to thrust into her and kept pulling all the way out and driving back in as far as I could go. I leaned forward to hug her hips with my arms, pulling her entire pelvis against me, whipping my hips back and forth with my thrusts until she cried out. As her muscles spasmed, I thrust a hand under her cheek and pushed my finger into her anus. She wailed, bucked her hips and began clamping down on me again, her orgasm prolonged. I couldn't get enough of watching her in total abandon like this, thrashing beneath me, surrendering to me and to her own passion. Somehow I managed not to explode inside her. Delighting in being able to make her orgasm as many times as I could distracted me from my own painful throbbing between my legs. I backed out. She quieted and looked up at me finally. "My god, Fox, you're still..." I smiled goofily, "Yes." She opened her mouth as if to say something but I chose that moment to retract my finger from her back side, slide up and scoop her wetness on my finger as I pawed at her lips between her legs. She gasped. I brought my hand out from under her, around to the front and slipped between her legs. I slid down the bed placing her feet on the bed, her knees up. "Fox, what?" Her inquiry was cut short as I began methodically coating my fingers with her wetness and sliding down to lubricate her back door. First one finger slid in and I worked it around until her muscles relaxed. Slow, steady. I rewet them in her vagina. Now two fingers swirled around inside her, loosening, and then three fingers. She is groaning now, incoherent nonsense. Her hips are tipped up to give me better access and she is craning her neck to watch me. I move up and slide myself into her wetness, and emerge coated in her juices. "You know what I want." She nods. Once again, I place her legs on my shoulders, but I lean over her, pressing her legs backwards until her thighs are almost touching the mattress. This tipped her whole pelvis up and exposes her fully, her cheeks spread wide. She is so limber. I steady myself on one forearm as I reach down and grasp myself and place my head at the entrance and press firmly against her muscle. I watch her face for any sign of distress. There is only passion and desire and anticipation. She nods her head in acceptance. I push until my head penetrates her tight ringed muscle. I see her flinch and stop. Then I feel the muscle relax and she nods again. Her hands are still gripping the headboard. I lean down and begin to suckle her nipple as I press slowly into her backside, feeling her muscles relax by degrees. When I am in about half way, I stop and begin to pull out. She grunts, "No, more." "Dana, I know last time I was able to...but this position, I might not..." She cut me off. "More. I'll tell you when to stop." "Dana..." "Trust me." I put both forearms on the bed, latch onto her nipple and again I let my weight sink down onto her. She seems so tiny, my body completely covers her. I slip into her, grunting for control against the tightness. "God, Dana, I want to make you scream with pleasure." 'You already have." "Again, I want to take you hard and I want to do it to you again." I want her to totally surrender to me. I'm about three - quarters of the way in now. She gasps, "O.K., move now." I begin slow, careful thrusting, my grunts turn into one continuous groan that comes up from my toes. I hear her pant, "Faster, now." I pick up my pace, and she begins making sounds of pleasure that cause joy to wash through my body. And then, what in one week I have come to love; she starts to wail and babble. "Ahhh, yeah, Fox, harder now, faster now, of god, so good, you're so hard, oh yeah, keep going, yeah, baby, stretch me wide." I am thrusting hard and steady now. I feel my balls tighten and pull up, almost becoming part of my shaft. The sensations are indescribable. I grab her shoulder with my palms from under her shoulder blades, my palms up for better leverage around the top of her shoulders. Just like before, I'm sinking deeper into to her tiny, tight orifice with every stroke. Her bottom is bouncing lightly on the mattress and springing back up to meet my thrusts and assist in this wild, out of control need to bury myself in her ass. Then I get the green light from her. "Oh yeah, stretch me wide, Fox, do it again, shove it all in, all of it, come on, bury it, bury it inside my ass, come on, harder, harder, shove all of that huge cock into me. Ahh, yes, just slam it in, keep going, bury that hard rod in my ass, just like before. Take me rough. Fuck me hard, Fox." What can I do? I fuck her hard. What is it about anal sex that makes both of us go crazy, crude and totally out of control, and crave roughness? I brace my knees on the bed for better power and I slam my hips toward her ass as fast and hard as I can until I am buried inside her again. Her hoarse cries continue and blend with mine until we both explode from the inside out and our bodies blend together into one pulsing mass of pleasure as her ass squeezes my cock, I pump her delicious, tight ass full of my sperm and her screams echo in my ears. I removed myself from her slowly, letting her legs fall and rolled onto my back taking her with me to relieve her of my weight. Her breath was still erratic. "Are you, O.K. Love?" "O.K.? yeah, I'm O.K." "You sure? I didn't hurt you?" In answer she tipped her head up off my chest and gently laid her lips sideways on mine and plundered my mouth until we couldn't breathe. We came up for air. "I love you, Fox. The pleasure you give me surpasses every one of my most wild, erotic fantasies. You've ruined me for anyone else." "Ditto." "Umm, and I love it when you call me Love, and Baby, or any of those pet names." "Do you?" "Umm, hmm." "Well then, Love, I'll use them more often." "I love you Fox, with everything I am." I suppressed a little sob at the emotions flowing through me. This little woman now possessed me completely. "Dana, Love, I love you too, god, you own my soul." We kissed tenderly and curled up to sleep. http://books.dreambook.com/fanficrecs/gertie.sign.html GO HERE TO RECOMMEND THIS STORY TO GERTIE'S SHIPPER'S VIEWER'S CHOICE. http://chroniclex.simplenet.com GO HERE TO RECOMMEND THIS STORY TO CHRONICLE X.