From: Para8Dice@aol.com Date: Fri, 5 May 2000 17:40:44 EDT Subject: The Last Soul Source: direct Disclaimer: I do not own Mulder or Scully or any of the other characters you recognize as being X-Files related. They belong to Chris Carter, Fox, and 1013 Productions. In no way am I recognizing them as my own and there is no infringment intended. Title: The Last Soul Rating: NC-17 Keywords: Dana Scully/Family Relationship, MAJOR Mulder/Scully Romance Spoilers: One Breath, Paper Clip, Christmas Carol, Emily, All Souls, and tons more... Summary: Dana sees all she's lost, then realizes she needs to grab what she has left...Mulder. E-Mail: Para8Dice@AOL.Com Author: Paradise Written: December, 1999 _______________________________________________________ 1:12 AM Dana lie on her bed, tired, but seeing an enormous white light. Her huge blue eyes opened, then her face cringed from the pain of the light. She realized she wasn't in her bed. Well, she was in her bed, just not her current bed. It was the bed she had growing up. Dana sat up, and the light was blinding her. "Hello?" There was a shadow in the light, and her tired eyes were grateful that a part of the light was being blocked by a figure. It was a figure of a woman. Her sister. Melissa. "Shh, Dana, it's all right." Melissa came and sat down on the bed next to Dana. Melissa placed her hand over Dana's, and just looked into her sister's bright blue eyes. "My God, Melissa?" "Yes, it's me. I'm so sorry." "You're dead, I lost you..." "I know, I'm so sorry," Melissa said sincerely. Melissa cautiously placed her hands on her sister's shoulders, her face hinting the want of a hug. Dana just stared at her sister, her eyes huge and full of moisture. Melissa gently urged Dana's body closer to hers, and finally, Dana collapsed in her sister's embrace. Deep, painful, wrenching sobs came out of Dana, and tears fell onto Melissa's gown from Dana's eyes. Melissa tried not to cry herself. "Dana...it's all right-" "It's NEVER going to be all right," she cried. "Yes it will. Life's gonna get better." "Not without you in it." "I'm so sorry, honey. I love you so much, but you are the spark. The world needs you. The world didn't need me." "Melissa! Of course they needed you," Dana sobbed. "Not the way they need you. The lives you've saved..." "I need you Missy." "And I'm right here. I'm with you always. Like Mom said, we're still connected to them, even after they're gone." "You heard that," Dana asked. "I heard everything. I'm always with you." Dana was silent for a minute, just hugging her sister tightly. Melissa's strong arms held her with equal passion. "I love you, sweety. I love you." Dana sniffed and pulled back, wiping away her tears, ashamed a little. "Where are we?" "You don't remember?" "Of course I do. It's our room. But it's impossible." "My sister, the eternal skeptic." Melissa thought a moment, then a memory popped into her head. "You were sixteen when I left. On my last night, I came in to your room, and you pretended you were asleep. I said, 'Dana, aren't you going to get up and talk with me on our last night together?' and you continued to lie there. I left and the next morning, I was gone. Do you remember that?" "Yes of course, it was horrible." "And then I left you that note, telling you how much I loved you and that you'd catch up? You did then, and you will again. But not now." "God, what I'd give to be with you." "We'll have endless time. Right now, you need to focus on the life you have now." "But, what are we doing here?" "Stick to the subject, Dana. You and Mulder." "What about us," Dana said. "You're fighting it." "Fighting what?" "Don't play dumb. You're pretending you're not in love with him so that your heart won't get hurt." "I beg your pardon?" "Let go of that fear. That fear of the pain. You're afraid you'll lose him, and I understand-" "You don't understand at all, Melissa. I lose *everyone*. I've been afraid of love since I was a child, and it's as if God's now playing this crazy joke on me, proving to me I was right to have that fear as a child-" "Don't you understand? He's trying to make you get over it. You have to get over this, and the pain will stop. You're in love with Mulder. Intimately, passionately, you name it. But you're both so fucked up." "Why don't you just come out and say whatever's on your mind," Dana said through a disbelieving laugh. Melissa was very serious. "Why don't you?" Dana looked at her, her smile faded, and she grew serious. "At times, I'm very attracted to him-" "Attracted," Melissa mimicked. "You think I don't know about your fantasies and hopes? What about that hallway incident?" "What about it? It was interrupted." "You wanted it, he wanted it. The two of you are just too goddamned scared to recreate that moment, but it can be recreated, and I will beat the living shit out of you if you don't recreate it!" Dana was a little confused. "Missy, since when do you care about my love life? And who decided that Mulder should fit in that place?" "You did. The first time you looked at him. My point is, he's in your life, you don't *have* any other life, take advantage of the fact that you love him and deepen the relationship to the fullest." "Our relationship couldn't be any deeper!" "Yeah, but you're missing a person who could be acceptional in bed!" Dana burst out laughing. Melissa did too. "Well, come on, am I wrong?" "Did you see the kiss we shared on the millennium?" "Yes, it was wonderful, but it was New Years. That kinda doesn't count as much as a confession of 'I love you'. He told you he loved you once, and you were so stupid. You didn't believe him!" "Hey, I had good reason. Ever since he had woken up, he'd been saying insane things!" "Yeah, well, he was serious about that. He meant it. He loves you. He always has. And you feel the same, so, move it along. Go to the next step. Like...oh my God, go to his apartment and talk with him!" "All right, I'll talk with him. But, I'm not going to go to his apartment, rip my clothes off, and sleep with him-" "Hell, I would!" "Yeah, I know you would-" "HEY!" They both laughed. Whatever this was, this situation, this place, this time period, it was a mistake. An insane joke. "Oh Dana, I love you SO much. I want you to be happy, and I know you'll be happy if you let go of this fear. I'm so sorry I couldn't stay with you, but you have to know that I'm always with you." "I believe you. I trust you. My big sister. I miss you." Melissa grabbed Dana's hand and put it against her cheek. "This is really me. This is my hand, this is my cheek, these are my lips," she said kissing Dana's hand, "and this is my heart," Melissa said placing Dana's hand on her heart. "I feel you completely," Dana said. "I have a surprise for you." Melissa stood up and suddenly, her father came through the light, holding Emily in his arms. Even Queequeg was at their side. Melissa took her niece's small body from her father. "Ooph, Emily honey." Melissa gently curved Emily's small legs around her waist looked at her sister. Dana had never seen anything more precious than her daughter and sister in a loving embrace. Melissa walked closer to her, and the tears were already falling out of Dana's eyes. "Would you like to hold your daughter," Melissa asked with a smile. Dana slowly held her arms out and Emily took hold of her mother's neck. Dana pulled her daughter completely to her, and supported Emily on her stomach, hugging her. "Ooh. Oh my God! Emily! Emily," she sobbed loudly. "It's okay, Mommy," Emily's precious voice said. Dana smothered her daughter's cheeks in kisses. Dana's nose began to run and the tears wouldn't stop flowing down her face. She was shimmery in seconds, completely soaked in her own happy tears. "My God, Melissa! Is this real? Am I holding my child?" "Yes, she's with you too. She knows it wasn't your fault, and she knew you loved her." Dana giggled once and looked into Emily's big blue eyes. "Really?" Emily puckered her bottom lip and nodded. Dana hugged her and laughed. "Mommy, you're squishing me." "I'm sorry sweety, I just love you so much." "She loves you back, Dana," Melissa soothed. Dana closed her eyes, breathing in, and two more enormous tears fell on her already drenched face. A hand went onto her shoulder. Dana opened her eyes. "Starbuck." "Ahab. Daddy," she said in a pathetic, smiling voice. Melissa took her niece back into her arms and Bill Scully embraced his daughter deeply, giving her a warm bear hug. Dana breathed in the familar scent and continued to cry. "Daddy?" "I'm proud of you. You've saved so many lives, and you're fighting to make the world better. No father could be prouder. I promise you, I'm proud. I love you." "I love you back," she sobbed. She stood a few moments, in her father's arms, then something barked. Dana pulled back and looked down. She smiled. "Come here Queequeg!" Dana picked up her little dog and held him. "Nice name for him, Starbuck." "You're the reason." "Tell your mother how much I love her." "I will. She loves you two so much-" "But she loves you most," Melissa said firmly. "I don't know," Dana said. "We miss you so desperately." Queequeg licked Dana's hand non-stop, and she looked him face to face. "I am so sorry. I miss you so much! My precious puppy! You be good and I'll see you soon." Dana handed Queequeg to her father and took Emily from her sister's arms and hugged her. Dana felt Emily peck her softly on the cheek, and she cried all over again. Melissa went to Dana, and hugged her from behind. Their father embraced them facing Dana, with Emily squished between them. Bill, Emily, Dana, and Melissa stayed in this moment for a few moments, but then Melissa pulled away. Dana didn't let go of her child. "Dana, we have to go now." "I, I don't want to say good bye." "We're not. Our family's too good at saying that anyway, but for now, it's like a break. You get some more years of your life, while we watch you and love you eternally. Go back to Mulder, and Mom. They need you." Bill took his grandchild and embraced her. "I'm proud, Starbuck. Never forget that." Dana nodded as even more tears fell from letting her father take her child. Only a few people in the world could ever get away with taking her child from her grasp. There were only about four people whom she trusted enough to let go of her child for. Ahab, Melissa, Mom, and...Mulder. Dana stared at Emily's fat baby hands waving good bye. Suddenly, Melissa shook her shoulders. "Don't forget, Dana. All we talked about!" "I won't, Missy. I love you." "I love you back." Melissa clamped Dana's body against her. She smiled, cupped Dana's face, and then began to back away. Just like that, they were gone, and Dana was asleep in her own bed. _______________________________________________________ Fox Mulder's Apartment 3:39 AM "Mulder," the voice was insistant. Mulder opened his eyes from his couch to see Melissa Scully. She looked beautiful. She was glowing. She held out a hand to him. He took it and stood up. "Melissa?" "Yeah, it's me." "My God, you weren't really dead!" "No, I was, I am, I'm a spirit. It's really me though." To her surprise, he took her and hugged her, hard. She managed to get her arms out from his embrace to return the hug. She hugged him tightly back, but he didn't let go. "Mulder," she breathed. "I need to talk to you. Sit down with me." Melissa pushed back from Mulder and sat down on his couch with him. She took his hand with her own. She exhaled. "I love my sister more than anything, and I can't watch either of you go on this way." "Excuse me?" "You're so bottled up in your fear of losing Dana, that you close yourself to the possibility that you're in love with her." "Believe me, I know I'm in love with her." This shocked Melissa. "Well, that's progress. But you need to take advantage of that feeling, and use it to the fullest. Don't be afraid. Pretend there's nothing in your way, because in reality there isn't, and love her the way you want to. Show her how you feel." "It's not that easy." "Tell me what's not easy, Mulder." Mulder thought, and he couldn't come up with a good reason no matter how long he thought of how hard. She smiled. "There's nothing standing in between the two of you besides you two. Fight the fight." "What can I do," Mulder asked pathetically. Melissa stood up and the light rose behind her. It brightened as she stepped back. "Love her," she echoed. "Love her," she repeated. She disappeared into the light, and the light vanished. XxX There was a knock on Mulder's door. He rubbed his eyes and ran to answer it, so consumed in Melissa's comeback from the great beyond, that he didn't even have a chance to assume it was Scully. "Mulder, are you all right?" "Hmm? Oh, yeah, I'm fine. Come in." She walked in and he placed a hand on her shoulder. She turned around quickly and hugged him. He was caught a little off guard, but slowly placed his hands back around her, and squeezed her. "You okay?" Scully breathed a moment. "Yes." "You're shaking." "Let's sit down." It just occurred to her. That was almost the same four lines they'd shared on their first case in Oregon, when she had those mosquito bites. "Scully, are you sure you're okay?" She looked up at him, her eyes full of tears, but she had an incredible smile on her face. "Scully..." "I saw them Mulder. I saw Melissa. I saw Emily. I saw my father and I saw Queequeg. In my dreams." He looked at her more deeply. "Tell me." "Melissa came to me first. We talked, and she told me the truth. She told me bluntly that I was afraid of losing more people so I'd closed myself up. I told her I'd try to let go of that, and then Emily came out with my father, and my dog." Scully paused, wiping away the tears and smiling. She looked back at him seriously. "You think I'm nuts?" "No." "Then what are you thinking about?" "Melissa came to me too, Scully." "Excuse me?" "In a dream, in reality, I can't say which, but she came to me. She told me the same but she made me admit something I've only said out loud once." "Which is what?" Mulder swallowed. "I love you." Scully made a noise, a noise sounding like she'd been waiting for that all her life. She placed her hands on his face and brought him close enough to her, he could feel her breaths. "Don't you know I love you back?" She brought his lips down on hers and stayed there. Just that one moment, it was all there. The love, the comfort, the intimacy, the happiness. "Put your hands on me, Mulder," she murmured against his lips wondering how many times she'd seen Titanic. Mulder gently unbuttoned the first button to her pants and slid his hand down towards her warmth. She backed away from his incredible kiss and lifted her shirt off. She was wearing a sexy green bra and lace around the flesh of her full breasts. She tenderly pushed up his shirt, her fingers caressing as they made their way up his torso. Mulder bent his head down and kissed the skin just above the lace, which sent a spark through her body that reached down and tickled the area between her legs. He gently cupped her breasts and began to knead them as he kissed her mouth, until her nipples flowed over the lace on her bra and the bra was now no longer covering up anything to speak of. She tilted her head back and he unhooked the bra from the back, and threw it on the floor. Her breasts sank just barely, but were beautifully formed and absolutely perfect. He opened his mouth to catch her nipple, and while his mouth fully closed over it, he ran his tongue around her nipple, then he began darting it, next he made arcs over it, and finally enclosed his mouth fully over it, sucking on it intensely. Scully pulled his head up to hers, kissing him again, and then she pushed him back against his couch so she could settle herself on his lap. She felt him ready and hard against her, and she unzipped his pants and took him into her hands. She slid lower until she reached the floor, and took him into her mouth. Briefly, she rolled her tongue over him, then sucked him momentarily, until he pulled her back up, lied her down, and he peeled down her jeans. He gently lifted her leg up and put it over his shoulder, and tasted the delicate, folds of skin with his tongue, hearing her moan lightly. He deeply ran his tongue over the top of her clitoris, then trailed his tongue down until he reached her opening, where he then slipped inside her. She thrusted her hips lightly and he quickly withdrew and pushed himself inside her body, filling her finally. He moaned lightly and gathered her in his arms, thrusting and kissing at the same time, moans coming with their overlapping kisses. His hands tangled fiercely in her hair, and she felt her climax approaching, and knew he was close to his as well. She tightened her muscles and thrusted upwards one last time, until finally, he groaned in unison with her, and he gently smiled down at her and slowly kissed her mouth. Moments passed and finally their heavy breathing lessened. "Mulder?" "Yeah?" "What did Melissa say?" "She told me that I was fighting my feelings for you and that I was too afraid to even tell myself I was in love with you. She told me to let go and love you." "You did. You and I both had a hard lesson to learn. I am so happy I'm here, and I'm so grateful to her, for opening our eyes. I'm just sorry it didn't happen sooner." "I'm sorry too, but now we've got it, and we don't have to let it go." "No...we don't."