Title: Memories of Passion

Author: Andrea

Rated: NC-17

Category: MSR, S, Scully POV, Post Requiem...in a good way

Disclaimer: Not mine

Spoilers: Requiem

Notes: Very big thanks to Dan, Jemirah and Aly for beta reading
and lots of gratitude to Kell and Angela for moral support.

Archiving: I'd be honoured :)

Feedback: Yes please! ardywyn@hotmail.com

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I remember the call vividly. I had been sound asleep when the
phone rang, but the adrenaline that began to course through my
veins had me wide awake instantly.

"Hello," I said breathlessly.

"It's me, Scully." My heart leapt at the familiar greeting.

"Mulder? Is that really you? Are you okay?"

His chuckling at my questions had a calming effect on me.

"Yes, it's really me. I'm in Bellefleur and I'm okay. My memory
is kinda like Swiss cheese, but other than that I'm fine," he
informed me.

"Do you have any memory of what happened while you were gone?" I
wanted to know.

"None." I could hear the disappointment in his voice. 

"When were you returned?"

"I woke up in the woods at dusk tonight," he let me know.

"Dusk? Weren't you cold?" I was worried instantly.

"Not at all. Maybe I wasn't there for long," he suggested.

"When can you come home?" I asked. I was desperate to see him.

"Well, the doctor wants me to stay another 12 hours for
observation."

"You're in the hospital?" I remembered waking up in the hospital
when I was returned. "But you're okay?"

"I know, Scully. I remember what happened when you were returned,
but I'm fine. The doctors can't find anything at all wrong with
me. Even they are surprised--they've had a lot of experience
with this kind of thing around here. But none of the people who
were taken this time are injured in any way."

"I wonder why? I mean that's great, Mulder, just strange." I was
already worried about long term effects. "Do you have an
implant?"

"No, and I'm the only one who doesn't; but all of the others had
been abducted before," he reminded me.

Relief washed over me instantly. No implant! I could hardly
believe it. "That's fantastic, Mulder."

"I was very relieved, too, Scully, I can't wait to see you,"
he almost whispered into the phone.

"Mulder, I can't fly out to pick you up," I had to tell him.

"Oh," he responded quietly, sounding dejected.

"Do you remember that I was feeling ill before you were taken?" I
inquired.

"No I don't, Scully, I'm sorry. What's wrong? Are you sick?" he
sounded concerned.

"Not really," I tried to ease his fears, "I just can't fly right
now. I'll be able to explain better when you get here," I
promised.

"Your cancer hasn't come back, has it?" he asked quietly.

"No, Mulder, it hasn't. I'll be okay. It's just a problem with
flying,"  I tried again to reassure him. How could I break it to
him over the phone that I was pregnant? We had never taken any
precautions when we were intimate because we both thought that I
couldn't conceive. I assumed that Mulder would be as thrilled as
I was, but long distance was not the way to tell him.

"So will you arrange a flight then?"

"Actually, I was going to send Skinner out to pick you up," I
informed him.

"Skinner?" he repeated.

"He was there when you were taken and he feels responsible for
losing you."

"Losing me?" Mulder laughed.

The tension that had built up when I told him that I couldn't fly
out there seemed to dissipate immediately.

"He was very upset," I told him.

"Really?" he sounded surprised.

"He wasn't the only one, Mulder. You have no idea how thrilled I
am to hear your voice," I sighed.

"I was ecstatic to hear your voice too, Scully."

"No, your plan seemed to work. *I* was safe," I chided him.

"Skinner told me that I'd asked you to stay in D.C. to keep you 
safe," he informed me.

"I figured it out that it was you that they wanted, but it was 
too late. Besides, what's done is done and you're safe now," I 
reminded him.

"I'm sorry I was gone so long," he apologized.

"It wasn't your fault, Mulder," I chuckled. "Is it okay if I ask
Skinner to bring you straight here from the airport?" I added
quickly.

"I was hoping you would," he confessed.

"You have no idea how much I've missed you, Mulder."

"I think I might," he chuckled.

When we finally hung up I called Skinner. He sounded almost as
relieved as I had been. We decided it might be better if he
slowly broke the news to Mulder. I wouldn't want the sight of me
to shock him too severely. People who knew that I was pregnant
were still overwhelmed by how big I was. My mother said that I
was pregnant from my shoulders to my knees--yet another one of
the delights of being short.

Luckily for me being eight months pregnant was so exhausting that
I fell back to sleep almost immediately. In the morning I called
my mother to tell her the news. Knowing instinctively that I
would want to clean everything until it sparkled in preparation
for Mulder's return, she offered to come over to help me.
Before she arrived I made a quick trip to Mulder's apartment to
retrieve some of his clothes and his shaving kit. I wasn't
planning to let him out of my sight for a very long time.

While we were busily cleaning that afternoon Skinner called to
tell us that their flight would be arriving at Dulles at 8 that
night. All of my excitement wasn't enough to keep me awake
though. Even though I'd been warned, I wasn't prepared for how
draining carrying a child could be. I had thought most of my
fatigue was due to Mulder's absence and that when he was returned
I would have more energy. In fact, the opposite happened. I
had slept even more.

I set the alarm for 7:30, just in case, and was surprised when it
actually woke me. After taking a quick shower I began to pace
around my living room.  When I heard the door begin to open, I
think I set a land-speed record for a pregnant woman.

Mulder stood and stared at me in awe. As my hands were wrapping
around his neck, his went to my belly.

"Scully," he whispered.

I pulled back to look at him, trying to judge what he was
thinking.

"Don't worry," he said, gently. I was afraid that he wouldn't be 
happy about the pregnancy, but I hadn't realized that my face was
showing that fear so plainly.  "You have no idea how long I've 
wanted this for you...for us."

"Oh, Mulder," I breathed, throwing my arms around his neck again.
I tried to stop my tears, but I couldn't. Mulder spent most of
the evening comforting me. I tried to convince him that I should
be comforting him, but he kept assuring me that he was fine. I'd
hoped that we would make love that night but we ended up falling
asleep in each other's arms.

When I woke the next morning, I was facing away from Mulder and 
was very pleased to feel his erection pressing into me. Savoring
the feeling, I snuggled back against him.

"Scully," he breathed.

"Mmm." I wiggled against him again.

"Can we?" he asked, his voice had a familiar raspiness to it that
further heightened my desire. "I mean, is it safe?"

"It's perfectly safe, Mulder. We are just limited to a few
positions," I assured him as I reached back in an attempt to
pull him closer.

"And this would be one of them?" he chuckled.

"It would be, but you always liked to spoon anyway," I reminded
him.

"Still do," he said as his lips descended onto my neck. I
couldn't help groaning. Apparently pleased with his success,
Mulder continued his assault.  While he nipped at my flesh he
slipped his hand under my nightie and began to squeeze my breast.
I was in heaven. I had missed his touch so much.

"Um, Scully?" Mulder lifted his lips from my shoulder.

"Mmm?"

"Your breasts...is it my imagination?"

It was my turn to chuckle. "No, Mulder, they *are* bigger, but
they won't stay this way," I warned him.

"Doesn't matter," he mumbled as his lips returned to my skin. "I
loved your breasts the way they were."

"I love you, Mulder," I sighed. He always seemed to say the
perfect thing.

While his lips teased the sensitive skin on the nape of neck, his
hand drifted down over my ass and between legs.

"God, Scully," he sighed when he discovered how much I wanted
him. "I love that I can do this to you."

When I felt his cock begin to slowly ease into me, my eyes rolled
back in my head. "And I love how it feels to have you inside of
me," I groaned.

"Yes," he groaned as he began to move, taking long slow strokes.

As best I could, I moved with him. A surge of excitement shot
through me when I felt his hand leave my breast, travel past
my belly and end up between my thighs. When his fingers found my
clit, I moaned and my internal muscles tightened around him.
Keeping his pace slow and steady, his fingers began to circle my
already throbbing bundle of nerves.

"Does that feel good?" he whispered.

"It feels incredible. You feel incredible," I panted.

"Scully," he said breathlessly, "You are so beautiful--you feel
so beautiful. I love you so much."

With his next thrust and swirl of his fingers, I was soaring. I
heard Mulder call my name as he followed me. He tenderly caressed
me as our breathing returned to normal.

Mulder and I had never made love like that before--this slowly
and gently. While I missed his usual passion, his delicate touch
made me love him even more.

I totally understood his reluctance to return to our previous
vigorous sex. He must have thought that I was fragile, and
although I wasn't, there was no way I would have been able to
move the way I used to. But it wouldn't be long now until the
baby was born, and shortly thereafter things should return to
normal. I knew how to be patient.

Before Liam was born, the closest I got to seeing Mulder's 
passion return was when I was giving him a blow job. I've always 
loved the way he reacts when my mouth descends on him; his moans 
and groans, the look of ecstasy on his face and the way his mouth
hangs open, the way his hands clutch at my hair but don't push
or pull me, the way he warns me when he is about to come, as if
all of a sudden I might not like the taste of him. But my
favorite part was the sound of awe in his voice as he said my
name as his climax overtook him.

He had only been home a couple of weeks when he 'returned the
favor', bringing me to one of the most incredible orgasms I can
ever remember. It also managed to initiate my labor. Mulder
panicked because I was two weeks early, but I convinced him that
nothing would have happened if the baby wasn't ready. I also
assured him that I couldn't think of a better way to induce
labor.

After spending two days in the hospital, life became a blur of
feeding, bathing and changing our newborn son. The doctor had
warned me, in front of Mulder, that we should wait six weeks
before having intercourse again, but 4 weeks later, when Mulder
was lying next to me, I began to feel that familiar tingling
between my legs.

When I began to kiss and touch Mulder in a sexually suggestive
manner, he backed off. By the time I managed to convince him that
regardless of what the doctor said, I was ready to resume our
sexual relationship, I had almost lost the mood...almost.

Mulder still seemed somewhat reserved to me. I began to wonder if
I had exaggerated the memory of our sex life. It's not like the
sex wasn't good--it was. Mulder was tender and loving and
conscientious. His desire for me was there; he couldn't hide
that.  It was his raw passion that I missed. At one
point I even considered confiding in my mother, but what was I
supposed to say? "He doesn't fuck me like he used to," isn't
something that I could say to my mother. Even if I paraphrased
it, she would just want to know if he still loved me and I would
have to answer yes.

Mulder is constantly telling me that he loves me and showing me
as well. At this point in our relationship it was no different.
The way that he touched me, looked at me and spoke to me
confirmed to me that he still loved me. I knew that I shouldn't 
have been upset about the slight change in our sexual 
relationship, but I was.

I couldn't stop thinking about it, but I didn't know what to do.
After all, he had been through a horrendous ordeal and here I
was, worried about my sex life. I guess I wasn't quite as patient
as I thought I was.

When Liam was about four months old, he began to sleep for longer
stretches so Mulder and I began to have sex more often. One
night as we were lying in bed kissing and touching, something
occurred to me.

"Why don't you ask to make love in front of the mirror anymore?"

I knew that he liked the way I looked. He always watched me as I
dressed and complimented me. As big as I'd gotten when I was 
pregnant, I had managed to get my weight almost back down to 
normal. But even when I had been carrying extra weight, Mulder 
seemed to worship my body, so I wasn't worried that he wasn't
physically attracted to me.

"Can we?" The familiar question and awe in his voice made me
smile.

"Anything you want, Mulder, anything," I breathed.

"I want to make love in front of the mirror." The richness of his
voice made me shudder. As I began to move to the foot of the bed
where the mirror was, Mulder turned on the bedside lamp. This
simple action started a flood of moisture between my legs. My
heart was beating wildly in my chest as I waited for him. When
he turned towards me, the look in his eyes was almost predatory,
creating another wave of heat in my belly. As he was positioning
himself behind me, he took hold of the hem of my nightgown and
swiftly pulled it over my head.

I was kneeling on the bed, my butt resting on my heels. As my
nightie fluttered to the floor, Mulder's hands reached around to
cup my breasts. Without thinking, I raised up on my knees and
leaned back against him. I groaned when I felt his hot erection
pushing against my ass. As he kneaded my breasts and tugged at
my nipples, he lowered his lips to my neck.

My eyes slipped shut as I let the sensation of his touch
overwhelm me.

"Look, Scully," he whispered. "Look at how beautiful you are."

I never liked to watch as we made love, I found it distracting--
like an out-of-body experience. But at his request, I opened my
eyes. In the mirror I could see his hands on my breasts, and
the way my hips were moving against him. The darkness of his eyes
as he took in our reflection made me gasp.

"Do you like how we look?" he breathed in my ear.

"Yes," I panted, but it was really the way that he looked that
thrilled me-- like he was ready to devour me. Reaching back, I put
my arms around his neck. Turning my head, my lips sought his. And
though it was somewhat awkward, we managed to kiss.

"I love that I can watch us together," he confessed breathlessly.
"I like to see what I'm doing to you." As he spoke he used his
knee to spread my legs. By arching my back, my hips were thrust
backward, allowing him access to me. In one swift motion he was
inside of me.

"Oh God," I sighed.

"Mmm," he groaned. "I love that I can see your face--that I can
see what you're feeling. It feels good, doesn't it?"

"Yes," I answered breathily.

As his cock began to move, his hands moved down to my hipbones.
The firm pressure that he applied sent waves of pleasure straight
to my core. We moved together, but in counterpoint to each other.
Every time the tops of his thighs made contact with bottom curve
of my ass, we both groaned.

"I love that I can watch your breasts move." His voice was very
low and raspy.

My eyes had drifted shut again, but I think I nodded in
affirmation. Then he began to pick up his pace and all coherent
conversation ceased. I was gasping and moaning as he thrust into
me with abandon, with vigor, with the raw passion I had been
missing.

I could vaguely hear something through the white noise in my
head and slowly realized that it was me repeating "Yes, yes, God
yes," like a mantra. Mulder's pants and groans also filtered
through, sending chills through me. In this position Mulder
couldn't reach my clit, but when his hand traveled in that
direction it was enough for me. Every muscle in my body went
taut and I began to shake. I cried out his name as white lights
flickered behind my eyes. With one more thrust and a guttural
moan Mulder followed me over the edge and I could feel him
pulsing and throbbing inside of me.

We collapsed onto the bed, panting. As our breathing slowly
returned to normal, Mulder gently caressed me and nuzzled my
neck. I let myself relish the warmth of his touch.

"You didn't answer my question," I reminded him after a few
minutes.

"What question?" he mumbled against my neck.

"I wanted to know why you hadn't asked to make love in front of
the mirror."

"I have a confession to make," he answered quietly.

I turned in his arms to look at him. "What is it, Mulder?"

"When Skinner came out to get me and told me that you were
pregnant, I was shocked, because I didn't remember that we had
become intimate."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Skinner said that your emotions were all over the place because
of the pregnancy and that it would be best to pretend like I did
remember," he admitted.

"You didn't remember that you loved me?" My voice cracked.

"I didn't say that, Scully. I remembered that I loved you with my
heart and soul," he assured me. "I could never forget that. It is
as much a part of me as breathing."

I buried my face against his chest and he held me as I relaxed.

"I couldn't trust my memory. I had visions in my head of us being
together, but I thought that they were my fantasies. I didn't
believe that you would want to do some of the things that I was
seeing."

"Like what?" I chuckled.

"Well, like this. I had a picture in my head of us making love
in front of this mirror, but I thought that I had just dreamed
about it."

"No, Mulder, you love to have sex in front of the mirror," I
smiled. "What other memories aren't you sure about?"

"There is one about a video camera and a bubble gum-pink wig,"
he informed me.

"That is still a fantasy," I laughed.

"Oh, I guess the one where you used your vibrator for me was just
a dream, too," he sighed.

"No, that one is real, Mulder." I had to laugh at the expression
of wonder on his face.

"What about the memory I have of asking you to marry me?" he
asked quietly.

"Dream," I whispered, shaking my head.

"I think we should change that."

end

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