REMEMBER ME? (1/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fifteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: Mulder and Scully, X-Files etc do not belong to me. They belong to Chris Carter - shucks - I always promised my mother I'd never steal - I guess its okay if I swear not to make any money from them and return them when I'm done. Spoilers: Everything up to that fantabulous movie. ***************************************** Residence of Kate and Peter Roberts Concannon Alberta, Canada November 15th, 1999 1.13 a.m. She awoke and couldn't remember her name. Perspiration made her pyjamas cling to her. Her breathing was heavy. What was her name? She sat up in bed suddenly and regretted the movement. It disturbed her sleeping companion. "Kate?" Her head swung around to look at the man lying beside her in the bed. Moonlight illuminated his features enough for her to see his look of concern. "What's the matter?" She cleared her throat. "Nothing, sorry I woke you." He reached out and stroked her arm. "Bad dream?" "I'm not sure, I can't remember." She lay back down. "I can't remember anything." "Do you want to talk?" Shaking her head, she turned to smile at him. "No. Go to sleep. I'm fine." Skitters Bar Washington DC November 16th, 1999 2.18pm The bar was almost deserted. Fox Mulder was one of only three patrons. He slung back another shot of tequila, looked at his watch and dismissed the idea of going back to work. So what if they fired him? It didn't matter. He'd be perfectly happy to spend the rest of his days here, trying to kill himself with drink. The door opened, emitting a blast of cold air and a tall figure. Mulder blinked as the man approached. Walter Skinner sat opposite him, and nodded at the row of empty glasses on the table. "Is this official FBI business?" Mulder smirked. "Research." "Mulder. They'll can your ass." "And?" A look of sympathy crossed Skinner's eyes. "Your cell phone is switched off. I got a call from some friends of yours who wanted to get in touch with you." "Friends? My friend is missing. Gone. Disappeared into thin air." "I'm talking about those clowns that run that ridiculous magazine. It must be important Mulder, if they're willing to contact the Assistant Director of the FBI in an effort to get in touch with you. I told them I might know where to find you. Why don't you go over there and talk to them?" "What about work?" "I'll cover for you. Anything to stop you drinking yourself to death." Skinner stood and looked down at him seriously before leaving. "You've got to try and pull yourself together Mulder. She wouldn't have wanted to see you like this." "You think she's dead?" Skinner flinched at the question. Mulder's voice was vulnerable, small; like a child's and there was a terrible look of desolation in his eyes. "I don't know." "You're talking like you think she's dead." "Fourteen months Mulder, without any news, that's a long time." "Her mother thinks she's dead. She held a memorial service for her." "I know, I attended it." "She asked me to read the eulogy." "I read it instead Mulder." Mulder frowned at him and stood, losing his balance and knocking a couple of the glasses over. Skinner caught him by the elbow and steadied him while he collected his jacket. "I couldn't go, I just couldn't." "I understand. You don't want to let go." "But I should have....she was my..... my partner...." "Come on Mulder. I'll drop you off, you're in no state to drive." Skinner drove quickly along the city streets, following Mulder's directions, wanting to be rid of his companion and yet feeling guilty about it. Mulder's company was always difficult these days, whether he was drunk or sober. Since Scully's disappearance, he had watched his agent go through a whole gamut of emotions and moods. At first there had been anger, and now there was great sadness. There was guilt and frustration to be dealt with, but mostly, he thought that Mulder was simply lonely. "Stop, we're here." Skinner looked at the run-down building doubtfully. "Here?" "Doesn't look much I know, but it's their home." Mulder reached for the door handle and Skinner put a hand on his arm. "If you need anything, I'm here. If I can help, or get you some help to get through this......." Mulder didn't let him finish, he was out of the car and walking towards the Gunmen's office with a stagger. He smirked at the Assistant Director's words as he pressed the entrance buzzer. As if anybody could help him feel better. Langly admitted him with a nervous smile. "Been drinking man?" Trying not to fall up the stairs, Mulder shrugged. "I've merely taken the edge off my sobriety Langly. After you fools have bored me senseless with some meaningless trivia I plan to drink myself into another existence and not return to this one for at least five days." Frohike had heard the sentence and winced at Mulder's state as he entered their office. "We got something that might alleviate some of your depression." "A Jerry Lewis movie?" Byers came into the room and switched on one of the computer screens, while smiling at Mulder's comment. "No. If it's what we think it is, its miles better than a 'b' movie." It took Mulder's mind a few seconds to process the words spoken to him, before he looked up at Byers with a mixture of hope and uncertainty. Frohike's voice held a warning. "Don't get too excited with this, we're not a hundred per cent sure." "Not sure about what?" Byers moved to sit opposite Mulder and took a deep breath. "We received something from a contact of ours in Canada. It's a report from a local paper. Our guys send us any unusual stories that they find for the magazine. We didn't think much of this one at first. A woman in Concannon, Alberta, that's way north, borders of Alaska, saved the life of a man who was in a car crash. She used an intricate medical procedure that only a doctor, or maybe a nurse, would know. The strange thing is that she doesn't have any medical knowledge that she's aware of." "What do you mean 'she's aware of'?" Byers looked at Frohike, who pointed to a computer monitor. It displayed a newspaper article with the headline. "AMNESIAC SAVES MAN FROM CAR WRECK". Residence of Kate and Peter Roberts Concannon Alberta November 16th, 1999 7.52am "How you feeling this morning?" She turned from the window where she had been looking out into the yard. "Okay." Peter walked towards her, whilst fixing his tie. "You didn't get much sleep did you?" "No." "Kate, what more can we do? We've tried everything. Missing persons, therapy, even hypnosis. Nothing." "Peter, before that crash, I knew nothing of my past life. I had no hint of who I used to be, but when I saw that man dying in front of my eyes I knew exactly what to do. How did I know that?" He shook his head and pulled her into his arms. "I don't know." "Maybe I was a doctor, or did some time as a med student." "Perhaps." "I was thinking about writing letters to the different medical boards, asking if....." He kissed the top of her head. "Asking what? I don't know my name, but do you have me enrolled as a doctor." She let out a heavy breath into his chest. "I'll send a picture. Peter, you have to let me try." "I will, I have been, haven't I? I've helped." "Yes. Although, I know you're worried that my finding out who I am might mean the end of us." He leaned back to look at her for a moment before kissing her lips. "I wouldn't let you go that easily. I've gotta run, I'll be late for work." "Okay." She watched him walk to the door. "Have a good day." "You too." When he reached his car, he turned to see her looking thoughtfully at him through the kitchen window, her red hair framing her face like a flame as it caught the morning sunlight. FBI Headquarters Washington DC October 16th, 1999 6.22pm Mulder's feet pounded along the corridor towards Skinner's office. As he reached the door, Skinner was leaving. He looked at Mulder with surprise. "Agent Mulder?" "I have to go to Canada." Skinner opened the door to his office and indicated that Mulder should go inside. He followed his agent, throwing the lights back on and resigning himself to the fact that he wasn't going to get home early tonight after all. Mulder began talking again before he'd had a chance to re-take his seat behind his desk. "I want to request permission to travel to Alberta, Canada, to pursue a missing persons case. I don't have time to fill out the forms, I've booked my flight. I leave first thing in the morning." "Mulder, slow down." "I don't have time to slow down." Skinner was mystified and a little annoyed. "What's this about? You can't just make plans without first consulting....." "I think I've found Scully." Sitting up a little straighter in his chair, Skinner pinned him with a gaze. "Really?" "Well, when I say I found her, it was really....this article that was sent to the.....some friends of mine." He pulled the clipping from his pocket and pushed it across the desk towards Skinner. The Assistant Director scrutinised it for a moment, concentrating on the grainy, out-of-focus picture of a woman at a crash scene. "Mulder, this could be any one of millions of women. It looks vaguely like Scully, but I'm not sure its conclusive enough to warrant me sending you to another country to investigate." "Look at the article. This woman turned up in this town eleven months ago, without any memory of who she was, or where she came from. Nothing, zilch. Last week, the same woman witnessed a horrific car crash and came to the aid of one of the drivers. She was able to save his life, yet before, she'd had no idea that she had any medical knowledge. The paramedics were amazed." "The timings wrong. Scully went missing last September." Getting to his feet, Mulder began to pace the room in exasperation. "I know there's a gap, but maybe something happened to her in those months. Something that caused her to lose her memory." "Like what?" "I have no idea, but I have to go and find out." Pushing the article back across the desk, Skinner regarded Mulder carefully. "Couldn't you put a call into the local law enforcement, send them a decent picture of Scully, ask them if they can give a more positive identification?" "No. I have to see for myself. I'm going. If you won't grant this as an assignment., I'll go anyway, on leave, or personal time, or I'll quit." "Okay Mulder. Go. Scully's disappearance is an open FBI case after all. Although I'm not sure how I'm going to write off two airline tickets to Canada." "Two?" "Agent Fowley is going with you." "I don't need her." "She's the agent in charge of this case. Remember, last year when you were screaming and shouting, and kicking the furniture, I had to put another agent on this case because you were too emotionally involved? Well, you're still too emotional. You need babysitting, She's going with you. No arguments." Mulder stared at his superior for a while, testing the man's willingness to give in on the matter. When Skinner showed no signs of weakening, he nodded. "Okay. I'll book another ticket." Supermarket Concannon Alberta, Canada November 17th, 1999 10.15am She was reaching for the Cheerios when she was aware that someone was watching her. A deep, penetrating gaze was directed at the back of her neck. Instead of turning quickly, she dropped the cereal packet into her cart and looked casually over her shoulder. Whoever, it was had been too good. They had left the aisle already. She breathed out and made her way to the checkout. She knew the checkout girl and smiled at her in greeting. "Hey Michelle, how are you?" The girl smiled back with a set of crooked teeth. "Okay, how are you Mrs Roberts?" "I'm great." She began loading her items onto the checkout. Michelle was in a chatty mood. "We all thought you were really brave the other day, when those two cars went into each other. I wouldn't have known what to do, I think I would have run screaming, but you saved that man's life." "Well sometimes you just act on instinct." Lowering her voice, she continued. "Michelle, could you do something for me?" "Sure." "Don't look up straight away, but behind me, there's a man looking at me." "Okay." "Take a casual look, d'you see him?" Michelle did as she was told, and then nodded. "Yeah." "What does he look like?" "Tall, brown hair." "And?" "Black jacket." Michelle looked again. "Sorry, he's gone now. I think he saw me looking." "Its okay. Its not important. Probably just someone who recognises me from the newspaper." Michelle started the scanning the items while she grinned up at Kate Roberts. "Geez, that was exciting, I felt like a cop." Kate smiled softly back, before a baby's cry diverted her attention. She bent down to stroke her son's cheek while she whispered soft words into his tiny ear. "Oh, poor baby. Did I wake you up?" End of Part One ********************************* Remember Me (2/22) Dreamland Motor Lodge Concannon Alberta, Canada October 17th, 1999 Mulder got back to his room and threw himself on the bed. He had only been in Concannon two hours, but already he had collected enough evidence to convince him that he had found Scully. The local Sheriff had given him a copy of the police report and some photographs that they had taken of their 'mystery woman'. He picked up one of the photographs from the bedside table and looked at it with the kind of emotion he'd had to hide in the Sheriff's office. Scully looked into the lens; her eyes even wider than normal. They told of her fear and made her appear younger. She was dressed in a hospital gown, and the sight of her bruised cheek, dirty hair and grubby hands made him want to rush round to the address printed at the bottom of the report, sweep her up and cradle her like a baby, whilst whispering in her ear that he would never, ever, let anything bad happen to her again. He cursed at the thought. It was a crime that the independent and strong woman that he had known, should ever appear so victimised that she could arouse that instinct in him. There was a knock on the door, and he placed the photograph back into the file before he answered it. Fowley strode into the room and stood in front of the television, turning to face him with her arms folded. He nodded at her. "What did you find out?" She sighed. "That the editor of the local paper doesn't like 'Yanks'. Nevertheless, he gave me copies of the original articles they ran when 'Kate Roberts' first appeared in Concannon. They're of the 'Do you recognise this woman' variety. He also gave me the original pictures they took of her." "The sheriff gave me some of those too." "It's her, right?" "If not, she has an identical twin." "So what are you going to do now?" Fowley watched him as he stroked his chin thoughtfully. That was the million dollar question. The one he had been avoiding, and as his emotions raced between fear and joy he made up his mind. "Go over and see her I suppose." Fowley shook her head. "That might not be the best thing to do. If she really has no memory of her past life its going to be quite a shock for her." "What do you mean 'if?'. The sheriff's report says that she's suffered pretty comprehensive amnesia." Fowley came closer to place a hand on his arm. "Fox. Maybe she doesn't want to be found. Have you thought of that? Maybe she wasn't taken, or abducted, or in accident. Say she just took off because she wanted to escape?" "Scully wouldn't do that" "No? Not even after she's lost a sister, after they stole her ova and created a child from it; after she was forced to let that child die? Think about it. Perhaps she just simply wanted to walk away." "She'd know that I wouldn't rest until I found her. She knows how much I care. She wouldn't put me through this hell on purpose. If she'd have wanted out, she would have just come and told me." "But maybe it's not just you she's running from. Maybe she had to deceive you in order to completely escape them." Mulder shook his head. "Scully would have found some way of getting a message to me. She wouldn't have left me hanging like this. She's here because she doesn't remember where she's supposed to be." Making a move towards the door, he hoped Fowley wouldn't follow him, but she did, all the way out to the car, where again she placed a hand on his arm to stop him. "You can't do this. What if she's happy? She's with this guy, this Peter Roberts, what if he's the love of her life, and she's blissfull, are you just going to walk in and destroy that for her by trying to drag her back to the dark world that you inhabit?" Losing his patience, and temper, he rounded on her. "You just can't stand it, can you?" She looked perplexed. "What?" "That I've found her. When she's back, I won't need your help on the X Files." He felt like a child in the playground and regretted the words as soon as they had left his mouth. "The X Files aren't your personal property Fox. I've been doing more work on them than you have ever since Scully went missing. How do you know the Bureau won't hand them over to me?" Mulder jammed his keys into the car door, ignoring her statement. "You're not going anywhere without me." "No? Try and stop me." "I'm supposed to be here to look out for you; watch your back." "Thanks, but I don't need the assistance." "Fox wait." She ran around the car and climbed into the passenger seat before he could drive off without her. "I'm sorry, okay. I know how much this means to you. I'm not trying to rain on your parade, really, I'm not, I'm just trying to warn you that you're going to have to tread carefully here. You have to think about Scully, and the new life she's made for herself, and not just your own desire to see her again." He sighed heavily and leant his head against the steering wheel. "What are you suggesting?" Diana considered thoughtfully for a moment before she spoke. "I think you should go and see Peter Roberts. Go to him as an FBI agent. Don't reveal anything, just get some answers. Then make a decision." Mulder nodded. "See him at work?" "Yes, and, I think I should do the talking." Offices of Hooper and Roberts Concannon Alberta, Canada November 17th 4.32pm The receptionist in the small high street lawyers offices was obviously looking forwarded to going home, and already had her hand on the off switch of her computer by the time Fowley and Mulder walked in. "We're just about to close." Mulder shot her a smile. "So early?" "It's not early, we finish around this time everyday. You Americans?" "Yup. We're here to see Mr Roberts." "Well, if you don't have an appointment, I'm afraid you might have to come back tomorrow, because you know..." "Yeah, you said, you're closing." Mulder flashed his FBI badge and for a moment she looked impressed, and then, tried her hardest to look unimpressed. "We're Special Agents Fowley and Mulder. Is he in his office?" She nodded quickly. "He's not in any trouble is he? I'd hate that. Mr Roberts is one of the nicest people I know." Fowley shook her head at the receptionist as an inner door opened and a blond man, in a thick wool suit and glasses leaned against the doorframe. "Forgive me, I overheard. You're here to see me?" Mulder's throat went dry for a moment as he sized the man up. Luckily Fowley spoke for them, making introductions, as Roberts showed them into his office and told his receptionist that she could go home. He wore a concerned, but friendly, smile as he took a seat opposite them, behind his desk. "So what's all this about? We don't often get visits from the FBI, isn't this a little bit out of your jurisdiction?" Mulder was about to speak, but Fowley jumped in before him with a look in his direction to remind him that he had promised to let her lead the questioning. She leaned forward and adopted a soft tone to her voice which, to Mulder's mind, made her sound insincere and condescending. "Mr Roberts, we run a division within the FBI which investigates strange phenomenon, unexplained events and the like. We read about the incident with your wife last week, and we'd like to talk to you about it." Peter Roberts nodded with an amused smile. "Are you kidding me? The FBI pays people to....." Mulder scowled at him. "Yes.....they do." A look of apology crossed the lawyer's handsome features. Fowley continued. "We try to explain the unexplainable Mr Roberts. Now your wife...." Holding up a hand to interrupt her, Roberts spoke quickly. "She's not actually my wife. I'm not able to marry her. We have a problem with lack of identification for the necessary paperwork to get a marriage licence." Nodding, Fowley continued. "Right. Well, we want to understand how she was able to help the injured parties of the car crash when she's had no medical training." "Maybe you should ask her that question." Fowley smirked at his response. He really was a lawyer. "Maybe, but we weren't sure what state her health is in. Could you tell us a little bit about her and how she came to live here." "Why is it important?" "Its not. We're just professionally curious. Could you start at the beginning?" Roberts huffed a little and considered carefully before deciding to co-operate. "Okay, if it'll get you guys out of my hair so I can go home and eat dinner. Let's see. It was just a little over a year ago. I was driving down the highway, and I saw a woman in front of me. All she had on was this hospital gown, and it was freezing as hell, so of course, I was concerned. I stopped the car and got out to ask if she was okay and she went crazy at me. She was trying to hit me and was swearing to get me to leave her alone." Smiling at the memory, he continued. "I got back in my car and used my cell phone to call the local Sheriff. I figured she'd got loose from a psychiatric ward or something. She kept walking up the road and I just followed her slowly in the car till the Sheriff arrived. He took her into custody, after a struggle." He smiled again. "She's pretty strong. Anyway, long story short. It turned out that she wasn't missing from anywhere and that she didn't know where she'd come from. She was admitted to the local hospital for tests to see if she was okay. They diagnosed amnesia." Fowley prompted him. "And, the two of you became close?" She felt Mulder tensing at the question as he sat beside her. "I visited her in the hospital regularly. I don't know why, but I felt responsible. I mean, I was the one who found her. When she was released from the hospital they were talking about putting her into a women's shelter. I didn't want that to happen. I asked her to come and live with me." "And she did? You were a total stranger to her." Mulder's voice was laced with incredulity. "Agent Mulder, everyone was a total stranger to her, but while she was in hospital, we'd built up a friendship. She began to trust me. I guess compared to everyone else, I seemed like an old friend. And, well, she needed help, and at the time I was a lonely man. I'd been divorced two years previously." Mulder spat his words out. "Hardly sounds romantic." "Not then perhaps, no, it wasn't, but we're very much in love now." Fowley cringed when she thought for a moment that Mulder might leap out of his chair and ram a fist down the other man's throat, but thankfully, he remained seated. "Have you taken any steps to recover her memory?" "Just about everything we can think of." Mulder stood, his body and mind too alive to remain in stasis any longer. "You ran a description through missing persons?" "Of course." "Not through the United States national database though?" Roberts frowned. "I'm not sure. You should ask the Sheriff." "I did. He didn't think it was necessary seeing as she turned up this far north and was wearing next to nothing." "Well, there's your answer." "I can't believe you didn't think of it yourself. Smart lawyer and all." Fowley was glaring at him. "Fox......" Regarding Mulder thoughtfully for a moment, Peter Roberts leaned back in his chair. "Agent Mulder. She decided to call herself Kate, and took my last name as hers. Why don't you take a seat and tell me what her real name is." Realising that his emotional state had revealed far more than he'd intended too, Mulder walked to the door with his shoulders bent in the shape of a defeated man. He turned to glare at the lawyer before leaving. "If she wants to know who she is, where she comes from, I can tell her. I'm staying at the motel for a couple of days. Let me know what her answer is." He left. Fowley followed him without so much as a nod of goodbye. Peter rubbed a weary hand over his forehead. ************** Home of Kate and Peter Roberts Concannon Alberta, Canada November 17th 6.15pm "Hi, you're late." Peter looked down at Kate from the bathroom doorway with a sad smile, as he watched her bathe Keiran. "I got caught up in something, forgot the time." "I'm going to cook some steaks when I'm done here." She pulled the clean baby from the bathtub and set him in the towel she had laid out on the floor. He groused briefly at being taken from the water, but stopped short of crying. Peter went to her and kissed the top of her head. "Sounds great. Tell you what, why don't I finish off here while you get them started." "Sure." She tickled the baby's stomach, which elicited a toothless grin, and stood to leave the room. "Have fun." "We will." Listening to Kate's footsteps as she descended the stairs, he lifted Keiran into his arms and regarded him with affection. "I just don't want to let her go. I know she has a right to know, but I can't tell her. You understand, don't you?" Kieran let out a soft cry and waved his tiny arms and fists around. ********* end of part two REMEMBER ME? (3/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Disclaimer: See part 1 ***************************************** Dreamland Motor Lodge Concannon Alberta, Canada November 17th, 1999 10.16pm Diana Fowley watched him rise again from the bed where he had been sitting, to once again pace back and forth across the room. "They're going to charge you for the groove you're making in that carpet you know?" "He hasn't told her." Fowley sighed. "It's a big piece of news, maybe he's taking his time, breaking it gently." "He hasn't told her." "Let's at least give it till the morning before we jump to any conclusions. There could be a thousand reasons why she hasn't called. I still say that there's a possibility that finding out who she is isn't welcome news. For all you know she's as happy as Larry in her new little home, with her charming, lawyer husband." She watched Mulder's shoulders ripple with tension. "Fox. You have to accept that may be the case." He glared at her and repeated himself. "He hasn't told her. If he had, she'd call, or she'd be here. You don't know her." Fowley got up from the chair to cross the room, where she stood in front of him to stop his pacing. "Think about the life she left. If you cared for her at all you'd leave her where she is, in blissful ignorance." Mulder looked at her coldly. "If I cared for her? Don't doubt that I cared for her Diana." She shook her head. "What is it about her anyway, I mean...what the hell had you so hooked? You weren't even sleeping with her...." "I wouldn't waste my time explaining it to you. You couldn't understand." Fowley headed for the door. "No, I don't understand." She looked around at him. "What we had was good, Fox. We could have that again. I could give you something to hang onto." "You'd be better off giving it to somebody else Diana." "I know that. Trouble is, I want only you to have it. I'm waiting you know?" Mulder nodded. "I know." When the door closed behind his ex-lover, he glared at the phone for a few moments before laying back on the bed. It had been an exhausting day, emotionally. Fears and hopes had been brought to the surface and realised. He felt sorry for Diana because she couldn't even begin to comprehend the notion of needing someone. She could love, and he believed that she had loved him, when they'd been young, but she didn't understand need. She didn't know what is was like to have someone so necessary to your being that you couldn't exist or function without them. For the fourteen months and eleven days that he had been without Scully, he had not been Fox Mulder. Instead he had been a hollow shell of man, propped up only by drink, grief and a desperate search for the other part of his soul; the part that made him strong. Already, being in the same town as her, knowing that she still lived and breathed, was giving him back his strength. He glanced at the phone, wondering if she could feel his nearness too. Even if she didn't recall his face or his name, perhaps she could sense that there was someone nearby who knew her, who needed her, who had walked by her side nearly every day for almost six years, and would be happy to walk by her side again for the next sixty. He glanced at the hatefully silent phone. Maybe he should just go over to the address the Sheriff had given him. Perhaps when she saw him, she would feel their connection; their bond. Home of Kate and Peter Roberts Concannon November 17th 2.25 am She was having trouble sleeping again. Even in their heated home, she shivered with the winter chill. Climbing out of bed gently, so as not to wake Peter, she pulled on her robe, over silk pyjamas, and moved to the nursery to check on her son. He was sleeping soundly; lying on his stomach with a thumb in his mouth. She frowned. That was going to be a hard habit to break if she didn't want him to grow up with buck teeth. She pulled his blankets up further around his small body and leaned down to kiss his tawny hair. She figured it was only a matter of half-an-hour before he woke up hungry, bawling his eyes out to be fed. She'd give up on sleep until then. She crossed the room to a rocking chair, and settled into it. Snow was falling against the window and she leaned over to see how much had settled on the ground. Her heart gave a little jump when she saw a man dressed in black, leaning against the streetlight. He was tall, dark-haired, but their house was set too far back from the road for him to be able to see his features clearly. She hadn't turned any lights on and realised that he probably couldn't see her. She had the advantage this time, and she moved to take it. Not making any sudden movements, she rose from the chair and made her way to the stairs, running down them quickly in bare feet, and racing through the hall, she drew back the locks on the front door and opened it slowly, knowing how noisy it could be sometimes. The man in black was still too far away for her to see. She'd need to go farther than her front porch to see him properly. His gaze was still concentrated on the top floor of her house. As she reached the porch steps, the front door slammed behind her and she cursed. The man became startled and turned on his heels. He ran fast and he was fifty yards away before she decided whether or not she should call out to him. Sighing to herself and turning around, she pushed the front door buzzer. In a couple of moments she heard the sounds of Peter waking up and making his way down the stairs. He opened the door to her with a puzzled look on his face. She pushed past him and into the hall. "Kate. What the hell is going on?" "I got locked out." "What the hell were you doing out here in the first place?" She ducked her head and moved down the hall. Peter followed her. "There was somebody outside." "Who?" They climbed the stairs together. "A man." "A man was lurking outside, so you decided to go investigate on your own, unarmed?" Keiran began to cry, and she moved a little quicker. "I don't think he meant me any harm." "He could of been a thief, or a rapist, Kate. That was an incredibly stupid thing to do." She entered the nursery and lifted her crying son into her arms. "If he'd have meant to hurt me, he would of done it by now. He's had plenty of opportunities. He's been following me around all day. Now would you go downstairs and get me a bottle please, so I can feed guzzle guts?" Peter looked astonished and frustrated, but left the room to do as she asked. Dreamland Motor Lodge Concannon November 18th, 1999 7.15am Mulder had woken up with a clear mind. Fowley's objections were quite rational, but this was Scully they were talking about, and the Dana Scully that he had known would wish to know about her past. She wouldn't want to live without knowing, no matter how pleasant her current life was. He was convinced that Peter Roberts hadn't told her somebody was looking for her. There was the slim chance, of course, that Scully knew exactly who she was, and had come here to hide from the consortium and him. Yet, even if that were the case, he still had to come face to face with her and hear her explain why she had felt compelled to run away. He had last spoken to her on a Saturday morning, the previous September. He had called about a case. She had just gotten out of the shower. With a smile, he remembered how he had teasingly asked her if she was naked and she had flirtingly replied that he'd have to imagine whether she were or not. It hadn't been like Scully, to be so openly brazen. He had been pleasantly surprised. He'd gotten an erection and a few moments later become so embarrassed by how hard he was that he'd cut the call short with a flimsy excuse about having something on the stove. He hadn't been able to reach her for the rest of the day. On the Sunday he had stopped by with bagels. She hadn't been home, but he had been reluctant to use the key she had given him. He hadn't wanted to invade her privacy, even though she frequently walked into his apartment uninvited, he never felt comfortable doing the same in hers. Her apartment was home, his was just a place to crash. It was when she didn't show up for work the next day that his slight concern turned into outright panic. He did use the key to her place this time, only to find her gone. No sign on a struggle. She hadn't packed to take a trip. No clues to her whereabouts. She had just....disappeared, and left him to grieve her absence. He showered and changed quickly. Why had he delayed it so long? Scully was here. He had looked for her for fourteen months, and here she was, only a few miles away from him, and what was he doing? Sitting around waiting for the phone to ring. He'd go to her. It was that simple. He'd knock on the door and tell her. "You're Scully, I'm Mulder. You may not remember, but we're supposed to be together." He opened his motel door to find Diana Fowley standing outside it. "I know where you're going, and you're not going without me." Home of Kate and Peter Roberts Concannon November 18th 7.52 am Peter Roberts answered the door, looked into both their faces, and sighed. "I guess I knew that you weren't going to give up and go away." Mulder nodded. "I can understand if you have concerns, but you have to realise that I've been looking for her for a long time." "Okay." He gestured towards the living room. "Come in. She's upstairs. Give me a few minutes. To explain things to her." Fowley and Mulder entered. Peter regarded them both with pleading eyes. "I didn't tell her that I saw you yesterday. I'd appreciate if...." Fowley was quick to interrupt. "We won't say a word. Let's start again. Yesterday never happened." Climbing the stairs, Peter felt the full weight of his legs. Feeling tired, and old, and a little heartbroken, he moved to the bedroom where Kate was getting dressed. She looked up at him as she pulled on a pair of black jeans. "Who was at the door?" "Sit down." "Why? What's going on? Bad news?" Her smooth brow furrowed in concern. "I'm not sure." He went to take her hands in his. "There's some people downstairs. They know who you are Kate. I mean, they know who you were." Her eyes widened in surprise and she sat down on the bed after all, as her knees gave out. **************** end of part three REMEMBER ME? (4/22) BY CAROLINE O ***************************************** Home of Kate and Peter Roberts Concannon November 19th 7.55 am Peter sat beside her as she digested what he had said and the implications of it. "Scared?" "Who are they? How do they know me?" "I'm not sure. Their names are Fowley and Mulder. I think the man knows you very well." The possibilities raced through her mind. A brother, a father, a husband? She got to her feet. "Can I see them on my own?" He nodded and looked down at the floor with a defeated expression. "Sure. I'll stay up here and take care of Keiran while you speak with them." She squeezed his left shoulder. "Thank you. I'll ask if I need you." Her throat dried up as she walked to the top of the stairs. She swallowed hard before she descended to meet with her past. Mulder stood up in the living room. He was too agitated to sit still. He glanced at the surroundings. The tasteful prints on the wall, the cosy, comfortable, yet elegant furniture. He'd bet a pay check that the room had been decorated by Scully's hand. He heard a feint tread on the stairs and his heart leaped into his throat as he turned towards the open door. He dared not blink in case he missed his first sight of her. Then she appeared. As perfect and beautiful as he remembered. Her hair like rich copper, her eyes that impossibly pure shade of blue. She stopped in the doorway, and looked up at him with a questioning expression. He wanted to hold her. He wanted to say 'hello Scully' and crush her in his embrace. Yet, she regarded him with suspicion and he didn't want to frighten her. She cleared her throat in a way that he remembered. "Well, are you just going to stand there and gawp at me, or are you going to tell me who the hell I am?" He smiled, and then he laughed. Diana stood up and crossed the room, holding a hand out which Scully shook. "My name is Diana Fowley. This is Fox Mulder." She looked back at Mulder. "Fox?" He nodded. "Wow! You think I'd remember a name like that." Fowley laughed too this time as she re-took her seat. Mulder chose to remain standing. Clenched in his trembling hands was Scully's personnel file. He'd brought it with him as physical evidence, and was considering his next move. Should they let her ask questions, or should he just hand it over to her and let her read her own details? "You always called me Mulder though, not Fox." His voice was weak with nervousness. She laced her hands together in her lap. "I'm not sure what I'm ready to hear. I'd like to know my name, where I came from? Am I a doctor?" Diana nodded at her. "Yes, you are. You're a pathologist." >From the upper floor a baby's cry rang out. Mulder looked up at the ceiling, wondering if the sound was really what he thought it had been. Scully, who hadn't yet been told she was Scully, followed his gaze. "That's my son. He's having a cranky morning." "You....you have a baby?" Mulder felt as if he had the wind knocked out of him. She examined his surprise at her statement. "Yes I do." Fowley leaned closer to her in interest. "When you say your son? D'you mean to say that your his birth mother?" Scully's left eyebrow raised slightly. "Yes. I don't know if...I'm sorry, I guess there's things you have to learn about me now, just as there are things that I need to learn about my past. His name is Keiran, and yes, unless they switched babies on me in the hospital, he's definitely my son." Mulder took a couple of steps closer to her and crouched down to look into her eyes. "I'm sorry if these seem like strange questions, but did you have a normal pregnancy?" "Pretty normal, yes." "And your son, he's healthy?" A scream filtered through the ceiling, and Scully nodded towards it. "Sure. His lungs work especially well, as you can hear. It doesn't seem as if Peter's having much luck calming him. Why don't I go get him so you can see for yourselves?" Mulder nodded dumbly, as she got to her feet with her accustomed grace and left the room. He and Fowley exchanged glances filled with shock. Upstairs, she took her baby from Peter with a soft smile and indicated that he should follow her downstairs. When the small family arrived in the living room, however, there was nobody there. She was checking the kitchen, crying baby on her hip, as she heard the roar of a car engine and the squeal of tyres that told her Fox Mulder and Diana Fowley had left. Dreamland Motor Lodge Concannon November 18th, 1999 8.20am Mulder burst through the door of his motel, with Fowley in pursuit of him. He threw his suitcase onto the bed as she watched. "I don't understand. Why are we leaving?" "You were right Diana, I should have listened to you. I should have left her where she was. Peter Roberts is an okay guy right? A little defensive with us yesterday, but that's understandable. He looks like he takes care of her." "Its the baby isn't it?" Mulder threw suits into the open case, not caring whether they creased. "Go and pack please, and let's get out of here as fast as we can." "Leaving her like that was shitty Fox." "I told you about Emily, right?" "No, but I've read about her." "You don't know how much, I don't think Scully even knew how much till then...how much she wanted to be a mother. And now, by some kind of miracle, she is." "Finding out who she was, isn't going to stop her being a mother." "Fowley, concentrate. They will use any weapon they can to stop me from getting to the truth. They've taken Scully in the past, who's to say they wouldn't take her son? Do you think I could ever live with myself if they did that? I have to get away from both of them, so that he's safe. Scully can mostly take care of herself, but he's a defenceless child. Yes, it's the baby that's making me go, because she doesn't deserve to lose another child." "She knows your name now. She could find you if she did a little research." Mulder nodded. "Yep, but even if she does, I have no intention of letting her back into this dark, crazy quest again." Fowley watched his frantic packing for a while longer before deciding that she really had no reason to stand there arguing with him. After all, she was pleased that he was distancing himself from his former partner, wasn't she? She turned to go to her room to fill her own case. Mulder went into the bathroom where he began scooping toiletries into his washbag. After that, he took the time to relieve himself. It was a long drive to the airport. He almost let out a scream when he went back into the bedroom to find Scully sitting calmly on the edge of his bed. She folded her arms. "I hope you don't mind, but you left the door open." Taking some deep breaths, he crossed the room and bent down in front of her. "Listen to me. I'm glad you're alive. I'm glad I found you, but you're putting yourself and your son in danger by being with me. I left suddenly like that because I realised that you're better off where you are." Her eyes widened, and she looked towards the door. Perhaps she thought he was a little crazy and was wondering how quickly she could make an exit. That was okay with him. If she thought he had a few loose nuts, maybe she'd run all the way back to Peter Roberts and never look back. "Okay....Fox." The name sounded strange, but she continued. "Now you have me really intrigued. I want some answers." He moved to shut his case and dragged it off the bed. She reached over and put a hand on his forearm. The contact warmed the icy liquid that had lately been running through his veins, pretending to be blood. Her eyes pleaded with him. "There have been times when I thought I would go crazy with wanting to know who I was. I have to know. I don't care if its bad news." He looked down at the thin motel carpeting for a few moments, letting the silence hang heavily in the air. "I don't want to leave you again. I've missed you, so much, but I can't do this to you. I can't risk anything happening to you." He turned for the door, and heard her stand up behind him as he twisted the handle. "Why? Why follow me around for days, turn up at my house, then leave without telling me anything, you can't do this." He let go of the handle and turned back to her. "Follow you around? I haven't been following you." "That was you right? Yesterday at the market, and at about 2 o'clock this morning, outside my house." He shook his head, fear running through him. "No. That wasn't me. I'm sorry, I may have led them straight to you." "Who's them?" Dropping the case, he took both of her hands between his, trying not to get lost in the joy of being able to touch her again. "It's best if you let me go and don't try to look for me. I don't want to destroy your happiness. You deserve to be happy." She swallowed, pulling her hands from his. "I wasn't happy before?" The knock on the door made them both jump. He automatically opened it and Fowley showed her surprise at seeing Scully. "You got here fast." "I know a few shortcuts." Diana nodded. "Mulder. Let's talk for a moment, in private." "Sure." He gave Scully an apologetic smile, and went through the door, pulling it shut, so that she wouldn't be able to hear what they were saying. Diana got straight to the point. "What now?" "Somebody's been following her. Ever since we got here." "And?" "I think that maybe the consortium had lost her as well. Only, thanks to me, they now know where she is. I led them straight to her. Fuck." "Well then, I guess you're going to have to stay and tell all, so she knows what she may have to deal with." He nodded. She picked up her case. "Listen, I'll put this in the car. You can take me to the airport and then come back and spill your guts." "You don't want to stay?" "Well, its hardly FBI business any more. She was missing, she's been found. End of case." "Okay, I'll be right with you." He watched Fowley walk away, took a deep breath and went back inside the room. Scully was standing by the door, he wondered if she'd been trying to listen. "I'm going to take Diana to the airport. After that, I'll come back and tell you all you want to know." "Okay. I have to go home and take Kieran from Peter anyway so he can go to work. He has a meeting that he can't miss." "Why don't you wait at home for me? I have your number. I'll call when I get back." She chewed on her lip for a while. "How do I know you're not going to jump on a plane too?" "You have my word that I won't." Their eyes met and they gazed at each other for a long while. "Okay. I think I can trust you." He smiled. "Well, that's a good start." **************** End of part 4 Further chapters will rain down on your heads like sleeping bags. ******************* REMEMBER ME? (5/22) BY CAROLINE O Concannon November 18th, 1999 3.30pm The snow had been falling strongly all day. She drove carefully towards the diner where they'd agreed to meet. The needle on her speedometer never went over thirty-five, even though she was eager to get there and have her questions answered. Even when there wasn't snow on the ground, she always drove steadily if her precious cargo was on board. She snuck a look at him in the rear-view mirror. He was gurgling and babbling, and struggling against the confines of his snowsuit and the babychair. He hated being restricted in any way. "Calm down Kieran, we're almost there." She was saying the same thing to herself. 'Calm down. Calm down'. Her heart beat and pulse had been quickening all day. Particularly since Fox Mulder had called her from the airport to say he was on his way back and 'could they meet somewhere?' She pulled into a parking lot and noticed a rented Ford. He was already here. Kieran started to wail. She turned to him. "Okay, okay. I'll spring you out of there. You're not a happy boy today are you? Bad day at the office?" He stopped crying, responding to the calming tone in her voice. She smiled at him and he returned it, glad of the attention. Mulder stood as she struggled into the cheap, bright diner. The sight of Scully with a baby seat on one arm and a diaper bag on the other seemed more than a little bizzare. She offered him a sigh of thanks as he stepped forward and took the bag from her to assist. "Sorry, I was going to leave him with my neighbour, but she had to take her little boy to the doctor, and I couldn't get hold of Peter......anyway" He shook his head to indicate it wasn't a problem as she set the seat on the table he'd been sitting at. Sure enough, in the seat, was a baby. A real, living, breathing baby. Scully's baby. Good God. He really had seen everything now. Scully threw the diaper bag onto the bench seat and collapsed next to it. Hardly able to take his eyes of the human miracle in front of him, Mulder slid onto the bench opposite her. "I forgot his name, sorry." "Don't worry about it. I've forgotten everybody's name." He shot her a look which suggested he didn't find it amusing. "Its Keiran." "Is that Irish?" "Yeah, I believe it is." "Its nice." Keiran made a sound which seemed to indicate he agreed. A waitress appeared to interrupt them and they both ordered coffee. After she'd left, a short silence ensued. Scully fiddled with zipper of her jacket, while Mulder dried his sweaty palms on his jeans. Finally, she spoke. "Now we've established my baby's name. How about you tell me mine?" "Scully. Dana Katherine Scully." She digested it, as if it were a tasty morsel of food, swallowing hard. "Is that Irish?" He grinned. "Yeah. I believe it is." He drew a circle on the table with his finger. "Nothing? You don't remember anything?" "You mean, do you seem even remotely familiar?" He nodded. She leaned forward. "No. I hope it doesn't hurt too much for you to hear that." Her mind began wondering again, as it had been all day, just how she knew this man, and what his relationship to Dana Katherine Scully had been. There was no ring on his finger but, of course, that didn't rule out the husband possibility altogether. She realised, with a jolt of awareness, that she didn't want this man to be a relative. She wanted him to have been someone with whom she'd once shared a bed. She was attracted to him. To his soft voice, to his long limbs, and the strange collection of odd features that joined together to make an awkwardly handsome face. Forcing herself to think of Peter, she was reminded that whatever kind of relationship she'd had with Fox Mulder in the past, she also had an existing relationship with a good and kind man. "Where do I come from?" "All over the place. You were a navy brat. Mainly Seattle and Washington though. You live in Washington now, or you did, until you went missing. Can I ask you about.....?" She held up a hand. "No, no....I don't know how long I'm going to have till Keiran starts getting cranky again. So please, let me ask the questions for now." She sighed, shutting her eyes. "There's so many things.....do I have family...or are you....?" "Yes, you do have family, and no, I'm not one of them. You have a mother, two brothers, some nieces and nephews." "That's all?" He thought for a moment. "Well, I guess you probably have aunts, uncles, cousins...." "No, what I meant was, do I have family of my own. A husband..." She glanced quickly at Keiran who was thankfully nodding off to sleep "...any children?" "No, nothing like that." She nodded. "I guess that's good in a way, less complicated." She looked carefully at Mulder as she spoke, to see if he considered himself a 'complication'. He must have guessed her thoughts to a degree. "We worked together, we were friends, good friends. We've known each for over six years now." "Then, you're a doctor too?" "No. That information about yourself is a little misleading. You're an FBI agent. You were my partner." She was touched by the warmth he imbued into the word 'partner' as she examined the badge he slid across the table to show her. Whilst she was looking at his picture and name, he slid her personnel file across the table as well. She glanced from the badge to the manila folder. "Is this about me?" "I thought you might need a little concrete proof." He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, wondering where the hell his coffee had got to. He needed something to do with his hands. "Scully." She looked up at her name and her lips quirked. For a moment he thought she had recognised the sound of her name on his lips, and then he realised she was amused by the fact that he was using her last name, instead of her first. He cleared his throat. "That's a habit. Sorry, if you'd prefer Dana, or even Kate..." "Have you always called me Scully?" He nodded. "Then call me Scully." "Okay." Motioning to the file she was about to open, he continued. "I took some pages from that. There's some things which can wait for later. Some painful things. I figured you have enough to deal with." "As long as I get to know everything in the end." "I promise that you will." She flipped the folder open, and her eyes fell on a picture of herself that Mulder knew had been taken around two years ago. Tracing a finger over it, she looked up at Mulder. "Jesus. I look so serious, so sad. What was I so troubled by?" He was amazed that she had got so much from a photograph that had been taken for an ID card. Had her pain really been written all over her face back then, and had he been too blind to notice it? He reached across the table and covered one of her small hands with his. "Later Scully. I'll tell you later, but for now, just read about yourself." Concannon November 19th, 1999 4.00pm Peter Roberts stomped his feet to ward off the cold, as the snow fell around him whilst he leaned against a fence by the side of a rarely used farm road. Pulling his collar more tightly around his neck, he watched the dark sedan with the Washington plates cruise towards him. The car stopped and an elderly man, with a deeply lined face, got out of it, nodding to Peter in greeting. Peter stuck his hands back into his pockets. "I've been freezing my nuts off here for an hour." The other man showed his impatience. "I'm a very busy man. You're lucky I was nearby." "I have a problem. Someone's come looking for Kate." "Her name is Dana Scully, Mr Roberts, but I'm sure she'll tell you that herself tonight. Fox Mulder is informing her about her past as we speak." "You don't seem too concerned." "I always thought he'd find her in the end. He's very tenacious. It was only a matter of time. In fact, its quite convenient. It'll divert his attention away from other matters." Roberts showed his frustration. "What am I supposed to do?" "Nothing, you've done your job. Relax. Go home and enjoy her while you can, she won't be with you very long." Peter couldn't think of anything else to ask. He had been dismissed. The man turned to go back to his car, throwing a parting comment out over his shoulder. "Your final payment will be deposited into a Swiss bank account by noon tomorrow. We'll let you know the number so you can draw on it and move it around at your will. Goodbye Mr Roberts." Peter watched the sedan pull away before he moved towards his BMW. He opened the door and sank into the drivers chair, running a hand over his forehead. It had seemed so simple at the time. To get himself out of trouble with the law, to have financial security for the rest of his life, all he'd had to do was drive along a highway and find a woman. They'd explained it clearly, 'take care of her and we'll take of you'. He'd been smart enough not to ask any questions. Sure enough, they'd paid him regularly, and the charges of tax evasion had been dropped. Yes, the offer had seemed so simple, that was before he'd actually seen her, and had fallen in love. Mac's Diner Concannon November 19th, 1999 4.15pm Mulder looked again towards the door of the ladies room, hoping to see Scully emerge. She had gone in there nearly ten minutes ago, after reading the file he had given her. The pages had contained the dates that her father and sister had died. He'd watched carefully as her face filled with compassion for the family members she had lost, even though she wasn't able to remember them. Her questions about Melissa's too short a life and death had been particularly painful for him to answer. Scully had become choked with emotion and had excused herself. He looked around as the other, almost forgotten, person at this meeting decided to make himself heard with a small noise of protest. He watched as the baby's eyes opened slowly, blinking against the harsh light of the diner. It was when Keiran started crying softly that he began to panic a bit. He put a hand on the babyseat and realised that it doubled as a little rocking chair. He gave it a push, but Keiran didn't seem amused and raised the volume of his protests. "No, don't cry. That's not good. Don't cry." Keiran's arms and legs began to wave in all directions and Mulder turned to the bathroom, but there was no sign of Scully. Shit. "Shhh. Be quiet. She'll be here in a second, just....hang on." The cries turned into fully-fledged wails. He looked at the baby in exasperation. "It's no use crying at me, I don't know what to do." Their waitress stopped by the table, nodded at the screaming child and turned to Mulder. "Why don't you pick him up or something mister? He's giving me a headache." He scowled at the waitress as she walked away. "Well, thanks for your help." He stood and bent over the babyseat, examining the safety straps that were holding him in. "Jesus. You're belted up tighter than an astronaut breaking through the earth's atmosphere. How the hell am I supposed to get you out of there?" "You just press the red button." He jumped a little, thinking for a moment that the baby had answered, before realising that Scully was behind him. He stepped aside to give her access to Keiran, watching as she pressed the button in question and all the straps loosened as if by magic. He noted the redness around her eyes as she lifted the baby into her arms and began to soothe him. "There's a bottle in the bag, could you hold him while I get it warmed up?" She held the baby out to him but he held up his hands in protest. "I don't think he likes me." Scully seemed amused. "At his age he doesn't really like or dislike anyone. He just categorises between those who feed him and those who don't." "Believe me, you wouldn't want to trust me with him, I'd probably drop him on his head or something. Why don't I get the bottle for you?" She nodded, and returned her attention to calming Keiran, popping her little finger into his mouth for him to suck on until his food arrived. He found the bottle in the bag, amongst all the diapers and powder, and bibs and tried to hand it to Scully. She shook her head. "It needs to be warmed. Ask behind the counter, they'll know what to do." Ten minutes later, Mulder was watching in rapt attention as Keiran sucked greedily on the warm milk whilst he reclined in his mothers arms. The scene was almost surreal. Scully, in climbing boots, jeans and a soft, warm sweater, her hair falling softly around her face as she held the bottle in one hand and the baby in the other. It was like he had fallen into a beautiful picture, and if he hadn't already have pinched himself, he would have sworn that he was dreaming. Scully looked up at him. "What really bothers me..." She faltered over his name and then recovered, "Mulder, is the time difference between when you last saw me, and when I turned up here. Where was I, and what happened during that time?" "That's the most important question of all. It's exactly what we have to find out. Only then will I know if you and Keiran are safe." ****************** End of part 5 Further chapters will fall like toads from the sky Feedback (yes please) to: caroline.o@virgin.net REMEMBER ME? (6/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ***************************************** Mac's Diner Concannon November 19th, 1999 5.02pm He walked her to her car, and watched while she secured the babyseat in the back. "Are you still being followed?" Once Keiran was buckled up, she turned back to him. "Not that I've noticed. Mulder, you keep talking of me being in some kind of danger, but you still haven't explained why." "It's a long and highly improbable story. Don't worry though, I'm sticking around. You'll get to hear it. I've got no choice but to tell you, although I think you've heard enough for today." The concern on his face stirred a warmth for him inside her. "Yeah. It has been a lot to take in." "Can we meet up tomorrow?" She nodded. "Sure, it might be easier if you come over to the house though. I might not be able to get someone to sit with Keiran." He touched her arm. "Okay." He looked at the baby thoughtfully for a moment and something dawned on him. Something that he couldn't believe he'd missed before now. "How old is he?" "Three months." "So..... he's not Peter's baby is he?" "No, of course not. That's why it's so important for me to find out what happened during those missing couple of months. I need to know who his father is." Mulder looked away, his mind was producing a whirl of possible scenarios that he didn't want to disturb her with yet. His gaze settled on the baby again. For the first time he really looked at him and took note of his features. He was a healthy child, with chubby arms and legs, bright blue eyes, a small, perfect nose and a full, generous mouth. The hood of his snowsuit covered his head, but Mulder thought he remembered his hair being a dull blond. He sent out a silent wish that this little boy would go on to live a long and healthy life. "I'll see you tomorrow." He wandered off in the direction of his car, wondering all the time about Scully's missing months. Residence of Kate and Peter Roberts Concannon November 19th, 1999 6.40pm She and Fox Mulder sat opposite one another across a table made of ice, on the table was a chessboard, and on the chessboard was a snowball, with one candle sticking out of it. Its flame was the only light in the room as they both stood and walked towards one another. He took her in his arms and they danced to a tune she couldn't quite make out. When the music stopped, their gazes met, and with passion and longing in his eyes, he bent to kiss her. "Kate." She woke suddenly from her dream to find Peter leaning over her. He smiled. "Hey sleepyhead. Sorry to wake you, but I fixed us some dinner." "God. Peter. I'm sorry, I came in and crashed out." She sat up to find that she had been sprawled on the couch. "Its okay. Big day huh?" "Yeah." She put a hand on his arm. "I have a lot to tell you about." "Alright, but let's eat first." He helped her up and she followed him into the kitchen, wondering whether her dream would have gotten more strange, and even more erotic, if it had been allowed to continue. Dreamland Motor Lodge Concannon November 19th, 1999 11.10pm Mulder was hunched over his laptop. The screen was full of medical research on amnesia that he'd been reading for four hours now. He'd gone through case studies where memory returned in days, and others where it never came back. He'd read about possible 'cures', which included everything from the simple act of taking the patient back to places they had been before, to hypnosis and electric-shock therapy. He learned that there was no definitive cause of amnesia and nobody had satisfactorily explained why some sufferers could remember how to behave and conduct themselves in society, yet couldn't remember any personal details about themselves. Many theories suggested that different parts of the brain were used for different reasons. That memories were in one compartment, whilst knowledge existed in another. His meeting with Scully caused him to believe that these particular theories were correct. He sighed and leaned back in his chair as his cell phone rang. He answered it with a curt "Mulder". "Hey man, how's it going? You found my favourite babe yet?" Smiling at Frohike's voice, he got up from his chair and laid down on the bed. It had been a hell of a long day. After this call, he was going to get some decent sleep and worry about everything in the morning. "Yep. Yep, I found her." "Way to go man." "It's all thanks to you guys." "Aw shucks. We refuse to take all of the credit. Ninety-nine per cent will do. So you bringing her back with you?" "Frohike, you know, its not like recovering your dog from the pound. She has a life here, things are complicated." As he spoke the words he realised that he wanted it to be as simple as his friend had made it sound. He'd love it if he could just sling her over his shoulder and take her back home. "Right, so you'll be up there for a while?" "I'm not sure. I'll keep in touch." "Okay. Because we were just wondering.....you see, Diana Fowley's been trying to reach us." Mulder was silent and Frohike must have wondered if the line had been cut. "Mulder?" "Yeah, I'm still here. What do you mean, 'trying to reach you?'" "She's e-mailed us." "Have you replied?" "Mulder, our e-mail accounts are only given to a very select number of people. We keep them confidential. We don't reply to uninvited mail, even if they are from your ex-lovers." "Right." He thought for a moment. "So, you're just pretending you don't exist?" "Yep, and we've terminated the account, but if you want us to contact her....." "No. Ignore it." "Should we trust her?" Mulder shut his eyes to think. "I don't have any reason to mistrust her....." "But on the other hand you can't be too careful, right?" "Right." Something about the way Diana had made contact with the guys had made Mulder uneasy. If she had wanted to get in touch with them why hadn't she just asked him, and how the hell had she found one of their confidential e-mail addresses? "Okay Mulder, I gotta go. Something importants..erm...'come up'." "New conspiracy?" "No. Baywatch is on. Get it Mulder? Baywatch....come up." "You need a change of hobbies Frohike." He hung up and placed the cell phone on the night stand, whilst he kicked off his shoes. Part of him was still stuck on Frohike's innocent question 'are you bringing her back with you?'. He wondered whether he would ever see Scully return to her former life. Wasn't it possible that she would choose to stay here in Canada? She had a nice home here, a baby, a man who seemed to care deeply for her. At the thought of Peter Roberts his thoughts took an even darker turn. He crossed the room to switch off his lap top and began undressing, trying not to think about the fact that the lawyer had been sharing a bed with Scully. That he'd kissed her, touched her, made love to her. He threw his pants across the room in disgust. It wasn't rational to be jealous. Scully had never been his lover. His shirt followed his pants into the corner. But he was jealous. He was green with envy. It wasn't just the sex he resented either. He hated the fact that Peter Roberts had been blessed with Scully's companionship for the last year, that he had seen her glowing with pregnancy, that he had been able to hold her hand and touch her hair. He'd received her smiles, frowns and raised eyebrows, when he, Fox Mulder, had spent the last year missing those gestures with a despair that had eaten away at his heart. When it occurred to him that, even now, Scully was probably laying next to Roberts in bed, possibly even making love to him, he tried desperately to think of something to do to take his mind from the thought. The task came to him in a flash, and he decided to perform it immediately. In fact, he was a little ashamed that he hadn't done it earlier. He picked up his phone and dialled a number. It rang for a long time, but eventually someone answered with a wary 'hello'. "Hello Mrs Scully, this is Fox Mulder. I have some wonderful news." Residence of Kate and Peter Roberts Concannon November 19th, 1999 11.30pm She lay in bed hearing the sounds of Peter getting ready for bed, but not really listening to them. Her mind was elsewhere. She was trying to imagine what her Mother looked like. She was basing it on an older version of herself and wondering if she were at all accurate. Maybe she could ask Mulder if he could get her a picture. Pictures of her whole family perhaps. She rolled her name around in her head a few times. Scully. Dana Scully. Dana Katherine Scully. Peter finished in the bathroom and she watched him walk towards the bed in his boxers and t-shirt. He tried to hide behind a smile, but she could see the sadness in his eyes. He looked like a man whose world was crumbling down around him. She wished she had the confidence to hold him and tell him everything was going to be alright. How could she promise that though, when a past life beyond Concannon needed to be discovered, and when her attraction to Fox Mulder was growing by the second? The pull towards the handsome FBI agent with the strange name was so strong. Was the fascination due to the fact that she'd had some kind of intimate relationship with him in the past? Peter got into the bed beside her and she pushed the thought aside. "Want me to turn out the light?" She shrugged. "Sure." He did so and then slung an arm over stomach. "You're going to be awake all night again aren't you?" "Sorry, sometimes I just can't stop thinking." He slid closer to her. "Want to try and take your mind off things?" She must have bristled in response, because he immediately withdrew to his own side of the bed. "Peter, its been a really weird day." It wasn't much of an apology, but it was the only thing she could think of to say. There was silence for a few moments, until he stammered out a fearful question into the dark room. "You're going to leave me aren't you?" She licked her lips and thought carefully before she formulated an answer, then she decided not to voice it, and instead leaned over and kissed Peter softly on the forehead, before lying back down and closing her eyes. When sleep eventually came to her, she dreamed about Mulder once again. This time they were in the middle of a forest. They both held leashes. On the end of hers was a small dog. On the end of Mulder's was a crocodile. She asked Mulder why he had a crocodile, and he told her it was for protection, because after all, you never knew when a vampire might strike. Mac's Diner Concannon November 20th, 1999 5.55am Mulder had woken early and had driven around town to find that the only place to get something to eat this early was the same place where he had met Scully the day before. He scooped scrambled eggs into his mouth at a rate that was bound to give him indigestion. He looked up in surprise when Peter Roberts came through the door. He watched as he walked to the counter to place an order. Mulder wondered whether he should make himself known, or attempt to hide behind the menu. Too late to decide, Roberts had seen him and was heading his way. "Good morning agent Mulder." "Morning." The lawyer sat opposite him. "I'm looking at you and I can see that you're wondering what I'm doing having breakfast at a crummy diner at a Godawful hour, when I could be at home in the loving bosom of my family." "The thought had crossed my mind." "I needed to get out on my own. To think." Mulder cleared his throat. "She had to know. Its important that she knows. I'm sorry if its changed things between you." "You could ruin my life." "That's not my intention. Besides, once she discovers what her old life was, she may chose to stay in this one." He took a couple of huge mouthful's of egg and downed his coffee quickly. He wanted to be out of the other man's company. It was far too uncomfortable. "I intend to do everything I can to hold onto her." Mulder got up and threw enough money on the table to cover his bill, "and I won't blame you for it." With that, he left. Feeling the full weight of the glare that Peter Roberts was giving him all the way to his car. ************* End of part 6 Further chapters will be squeezing down your chimneys soon. Feedback to: caroline.o@virgin.net *************** REMEMBER ME? (7/22) BY CAROLINE O Roberts Residence Concannon November 20th, 1999 9.02am He and Keiran watched as she loaded the dishwasher. Mulder had been starved of her form for so long that it was hard to keep his eyes off of her. She stopped midway through the chore and turned her gaze on him. He was embarrassed to have been caught in the act of staring at her small, lithe body and imagining what it would be like to run a hand over her bare stomach, and how it would feel to have his hips between her legs. "Would you like some coffee?" He shook his head, feeling somewhat depraved. "No, I've been drinking the stuff all morning." It wasn't that he hadn't had these thoughts about Scully before, and usually they took on a more erotic nature. Yet, it felt strange having them here, in a bright, suburban kitchen, whilst she looked the picture of domesticity, and her baby was slapping the table part of his highchair, delighted with himself for being able to make some noise. "In fact, when I went out for breakfast, I ran into Peter." "Yeah, he disappeared early this morning. Before I was even awake." Her voice sounded a little pained. "Maybe he's having a hard time with all this." She nodded. "What did he say?" Mulder lied. "Oh we just... shot the breeze. Nothing important." Her eyes narrowed. "You sure about that?" "He just said that he's worried about what'll happen now. That's all." "Okay. I'm almost done here. Why don't you take Keiran into the living room and make yourself comfortable?" He looked at the baby, who was looking back at him with a frown. "Um, I think he's kind of happy where he is." She shot him an amused smile and shooed him away with a wave of her hand. He wandered into the living room, gazing at the pictures and ornaments. His eyes fell on a framed photograph. A heavily pregnant Scully stood in front of Peter, his arms encircled her and rested on her huge belly. Mulder felt this throat tighten, and he sank into a large, soft chair with a heavy heart. Scully came in with Keiran. She laid him down in a playpen, amongst various, brightly-coloured toys, and sat opposite Mulder on the couch. "I'm glad you came over today. Keiran's behaving himself. I didn't want you to think he was a permanently miserable baby." "I'm so glad you have him Scully. If anything good has come out of all this, its that you've got to be a mother. You seemed to want that so much." "Really." She regarded him thoughtfully for a few moments. "I didn't..." He leaned forwarded. "What?" "Its not important." "No, please go on." "I didn't want him at first. I even briefly considered not keeping him." She looked away at Keiran for a moment. "That sounds terrible. But you have to understand, I didn't know who I was, I didn't know how I'd become pregnant, or whether I'd be able to support the both of us. It was Peter that persuaded me to keep him. He promised that he'd take care of us." She seemed ashamed of the words and was unable to meet Mulder's gaze. "When he was born, I didn't feel...I had no maternal instinct whatsoever. I didn't want to breast feed. I pushed him away for days." "What changed?" She smiled. "When we got home from the hospital and Peter went back to work, there was nobody else to look after him. Nobody else to pass him off to. I had no choice but to do the diapers, the feeds, the baths, and before I knew it, I'd fallen in love with him....and now, he's my life." Mulder saw the love that she described in her eyes. He wanted to rush across the room and inspect the baby for cysts that might look as if they would ooze green liquid. He didn't know if he could live through another Emily. It would be utter devastation for Scully. "Don't feel guilty about your initial rejection of him. I think, under the circumstances, it was pretty normal." "Everybody else thought I was some kind of cold bitch." "I don't. Like you say, you didn't know how this baby had come about, and you were terrified that you wouldn't be able to look after him. You were lost and alone. Those days must have been very difficult for you." "I just thank God that Peter was around." "Yeah, I do too. You know, Scully, its wonderful that you're telling me this. Before...well, we were a little closed off from one another. We didn't used to share much." "Why?" "I don't know. I think we were scared. We were frightened...." He felt that old fear creeping up on him again, it gripped his throat and choked him, while it whispered into his brain, telling him to stop babbling, not to make a needy fool out of himself. He changed the subject quickly. "Your first memory is of meeting Peter on the highway?" "Actually, I woke up in some woods. I ached all over and I was wearing a hospital gown. I made my way from the woods to the highway, where Peter found me." "Might be worth taking a walk in those woods." "I have. I've been back. I looked over miles of it. I found nothing to indicate why I was there. I have one other image of that time that feels like a memory, but it must have been a dream." "What makes you say that?" "Because its ridiculous. It can't be real." "Tell me anyway." She looked at him in a 'okay, you asked for it way'. "I have an image of......." Mulder leaned forward to show his interest. "Go on." "Its a Flying Saucer, UFO, or whatever they're called. Its hovering above my head." She had expected him to laugh, or scoff. Instead, he got up from his chair and moved to sit next to her on the couch. "Describe it to me." "Its just a dream." "Maybe not." Her eyes widened and she looked at him in alarm, and then burst out laughing herself. "Don't tell me you actually believe in that kind of thing?" Roberts Residence Concannon November 20th, 1999 10.15am Mulder's outlining of his theory on the possibilities of extra-terrestrial life had been interrupted by the ringing of his cell phone and he had stepped out into the hall to answer it. Skinners voice held its usual cautious tone. "How are things going Agent Mulder? I thought you would have checked in by now." "I've had other things on my mind." "I can imagine. I've met with Agent Fowley, she's informed me of the um....developments." Looking into the living room, he watched as Scully lifted Keiran from his playpen and cradled him against her chest. Yeah, that was a development all right. "I'm with Scully now Sir. We've been sharing a little information." "Mulder. Now that she's been found, this is no longer a pending case. I need to know if you want to take this as vacation time?" Mulder thought for a moment as he watched Scully tickle Keiran's tummy and heard him giggle happily. "No. I'm coming back. I'll be there in a couple of days. I'm hoping Scully will agree to come with me." "Okay. Well, if she does, bring her into to see me Mulder. The baby too. That I have to see." Mulder smiled as he heard the click of his boss disconnecting the line. He went back into the living room. "That was our boss. His name is Skinner. He wanted to know when I'm planning on being back in DC?" He thought her saw her face fall in disappointment ever so briefly. "Oh. When are you going?" "That's what I wanted to talk to you about. How would you feel about coming with me?" She looked everywhere but at him. At the baby in her arms, at the bookcase, the tree outside her window. "I'm....I don't..." "Calm down, I'm not talking about forever. I realise that this is your home now. I'm talking about maybe a week? You see, the story I have to tell you, about us, about why you could be in danger is complex and difficult. This trip would help me explain it, and at the same time I could take you to places and people that might help stimulate your memory." She took a few steps back from him. "I just can't leave, even for a week. I mean, I have Keiran." "I meant for you to take him with us." "I don't know." She shook her head. "Peter wouldn't come, he's scared of flying." Mulder tried to feel guilty about the pleasure he felt at that piece of news, but failed miserably. She sat down on the couch to think. Keiran was trying to explore her inner ear with his forefinger. "I couldn't. I always told Peter that my finding out about my past wouldn't necessarily lead to the end of our life together, and this, well, it would seem like I'm deserting him, just days after being told who I am." He sat down on the couch next to her. "I realise that you don't want to upset him, but you have to think about yourself here. You've been searching for an identity for a year now, and this is your opportunity to find out about Dana Scully. If he loves you, he'll understand, and he'll trust you." "Maybe I could visit in a couple of months." He shook his head. "There are things you need to know now." She licked her lips, and pulled Keiran's hand away from her ear, planting a kiss in his tiny palm. "Can I have some time to think about it?" "How does tomorrow sound?" "You don't expect much do you? I suppose that'll give me enough opportunity to talk to Peter about it." "Good." He reached into his pocket. "This is something else you might want to take into account when your making your mind up." He handed her a piece of card with a number scrawled on it. "What's this?" "It's your mother's telephone number. I spoke to her last night. She thought you were dead, you wouldn't believe how happy she was when I told her you were very much alive. She asked me to give you her number, and that if you want to call, she'd be delighted to hear from you." He watched as she stared at the card and number with eyes which showed both fear and longing. "She's a really wonderful lady." "It would just seem odd. Calling up somebody you don't know...when that person knows you so well." He put a hand on her forearm to offer support, but pulled it back quickly when Keiran began to fidget and whine; and shot Mulder a look which seemed to suggest he wasn't happy at all about his Mother being touched. Scully patted the child's rear and looked Mulder in apology. "You'll have to excuse me, I think its diaper time." Outside the Roberts residence Concannon November 20th, 1999 10.15pm Mulder looked at the clock on the dash and sighed. He'd parked his car three hundred yards down from Scully's house and was watching to see if she was being watched. So far though, no mysterious men in black. In her house, only the kitchen and one upstairs light was on. He had sat with her in that kitchen nearly all afternoon. She had asked questions about all manner of subjects. Thankfully, so far, none of them had been too uncomfortable for him to answer. They were just general queries about her life, her medical schooling, about what kind of work she did. He'd been amused by the expressions of sheer disbelief that had crossed her face when he'd described some of their tamer cases to her. Her eyebrows had seen enough exercise to last for at least a couple of months. They'd be exhausted by the time he started trying to unravel the history of the consortium for her. His cell phone rang and he answered it, suspecting that she might be on the other end. "I'm coming with you." He breathed a sigh of relief. "I was hoping you'd come to that decision." "I can't just sit here when there are things about myself that need to be discovered, and Mulder...." "Yes?" "I spoke to my Mother." He smiled. "How did it go?" "Good. She was as lovely as you said she was. She can't wait to meet Keiran." "Yeah. I'll bet she can't wait to see you again either. Is Peter okay with this?" "Honestly? No. I've promised him its only for a week though." "That's enough time. I knew you'd come with me." "How?" "Because I know you Scully." There was a long pause before her next question. "Just how well do you know me Mulder?" He smiled at the kitchen light in her house, sure that was where she was talking to him from. "Well, let's see. I know that you detest sweetcorn, you like Ben and Jerry's Cookies and Cream, particularly if its straight from the tub. You like to take long, hot bubble baths. You're a big Chopin fan. You wear silk to bed and you have a tattoo on your lower back of a snake eating its own tail." "Mulder...." "Yes?" "Goodnight." She hung up before he could say anything else and put the phone back in its charging cradle. She got up from the table and switched the kitchen lights off before making her way up the stairs. In the bathroom, she looked at herself in the mirror. Her face was as flushed as she suspected it would be. His voice when he had told about herself had been so low, so intimate, and the things he had said had embarrassed her further. He knew about her nightwear, and about her tattoo. Would a work colleague, no matter how good a friend they were, know those details? She wondered if tomorrow she should just ask him outright what she had been dying to know ever since he had shown up in her living room. 'Oh, by the way Mulder, were we partners in the bedroom as well as in the office?'. Not knowing was driving her crazy, but it seemed an inappropriate question somehow, seeing as she now lived with another man and any past relationships would probably have to be left in her history. Then, there was the possible embarrassment to be faced if she were wrong. For all she knew he had a lover in Washington. She thought briefly of the other agent he brought with him to Concannon, Diana Fowley. A brief spark of jealousy shot through her, surprising her with its ferocity. She went into the bedroom where Peter was sleeping and silently apologised to him. It wasn't fair on him, but she thought that she may very well be falling in love with Fox Mulder. **************** End of part 7 Further chapters will be heading your way with the speed of a virus-carrying swarm of bees. Feedback to: caroline.o@virgin.net REMEMBER ME? (8/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ***************************************** Deamland Motor Lodge Concannon November 22nd, 1999 4.32pm Mulder had beaten the computer at solitaire for the sixth time running when his the phone rang. He jumped to answer it, grateful for something to liven up his day. He wasn't used to sitting around killing time, and it was driving him crazy. For the past two days he had left Scully and Peter Roberts in peace. He'd wanted to give her some space so that she could perhaps reconcile Peter to the whole idea of her trip home. From the brief phone conversations he'd had with Scully, he'd gathered that Roberts' was still less than thrilled about it. He had the feeling that his constant presence in their home would only make matters worse. They were leaving tomorrow anyway. He had two seats booked on an eleven a.m. flight. Although, his 'staying away' gesture, had left him with precious little to do, other than research, eating and sleeping. Even jogging wasn't an option. Thick ice and snow made it unpleasant and dangerous. He picked up the receiver, hoping it might be Scully again, although he had already spoken to her earlier in the day. "Fox, it's Diana." He tried not to sound too under-enthusiastic. "Oh, what can I do for you?" "It's more like what I can do for you. I have a message. A Doctor Penn called. He said he'd do the tests on Monday." Mulder let out a curse under his breath. He'd asked Penn to return his call to his cell phone, and instead he'd called the office. It was hard to believe that a friend of the Gunmen's would be so indiscreet. "Okay. Well thanks for passing that on?" "You're welcome. So what are these tests?" Mulder tried to sound casual. "Just something to do with an old case." "What case?" "Nothing important." He heard Fowley sigh. "Mulder, when are you going to start trusting me. I've been working on the X-files for over a year, don't you think its time you started sharing a few confidences with me?" "Diana. I've never said that I didn't trust you. I'll probably see you when I get back." He hung up before she could question him further. He paced up and down a few times before switching the t.v. on and throwing his tense body onto the bed. Despite his inertia of the last couple of days, he felt exhausted. During his years on the X Files, he'd experienced both physical and mental exhaustion and had concluded that the latter was definitely the worse kind. That was the tiredness he was feeling now. The elation of finding Scully, the sadness that her not knowing him had produced, the jealousy he felt towards Peter Roberts and the fear that she may be in some kind of imminent danger. There were so many emotions and they were taking their toll on him. He felt very old all of a sudden. The phone rang again and he answered it with a heavy sigh in his voice. "Hi, its me. You okay. You sound kind of down?" "Hey Scully. Yeah, I'm all right. I was just thinking about retirement." She gave a soft chuckle. "You're a long way from that yet." She paused. "How old are old are you anyway?" He smiled. "I was thirty-eight last month." "So, is this a mid-life crisis?" "No, but seeing as though that usually involves a sports car and dating a girl half your age, I'm not totally averse to the idea of having one." There was a long pause before she asked. "Want to talk about it?" "No, no I'm fine. I just got the 'trapped-in-a-motel-room-with-nothing-to-do' blues. I'll cope." "Okay, well, I just called to find out what time you're collecting me tomorrow." "Around eight o'clock." "I'll be ready." "Don't forget to set your alarm clock." She chuckled again. "No need. I have a human alarm clock, and he wakes me up at six every morning without fail." It occurred to him that she seemed to laugh and smile a lot more now. It was almost a crime to be dragging her back to a life where there had been so little to be joyous about. It wouldn't be easy, but then, life never was for him. "I'll see you tomorrow Scully." Roberts Residence Concannon November 23rd, 1999 7.48am Her luggage and baby paraphernalia rested in the hall by the front door. Peter sat in the kitchen with Keiran on his lap. She walked in and ran a hand across his shoulders. "Its just a week, Peter. I'll be back." He looked up at her with a sad smile. "I'll miss you." "Things will be better when I get back. I'll be more settled, I'll have a sense of who I am. This is a good thing." The doorbell rang, making them both jump in surprise. "That must be Mulder." Peter gripped her arm before she could move towards the door. "Kate. Be careful. You're following him blindly because you think he has all the answers, but who knows what his motives are." "I can trust him Peter. I spoke to my mother, she said that he'd been a good friend to me for over six years." "I think he..." The doorbell rang again, and she shrugged off his grasp to go and answer it, not allowing him to finish voicing his thoughts. Mulder stood on the doorstep, looking more than a little sheepish. "I'm early. Should I take a walk round the block?" "No. It's not a problem. I'm ready to go." She indicated her luggage and Mulder was astonished. "I'd hate to see what you'd pack for a month." "In my defence I have to point out that hardly any of this is mine. Most of its for Keiran. That's the strange thing about babies, the smaller they are, the more they require." He nodded. "I'll start loading the car. Might take us a little longer to get to the airport though, what with all that extra weight on board." He gave a small smirk to show he just kidding around, whilst he lifted some of the luggage and took it out to the car. She went back to the kitchen and stood in the doorway as she watched Peter tenderly kiss Keiran's forehead, before he secured him into his car seat which rested on the counter. "You be a good boy for Mommy okay?" "He'd better be." Peter turned to her. "You be good too." She smiled at him. "I'm always good." She felt a softening in her heart for him, and when he held out his arms she fell into his hug. The past couple of days had seen them consumed with bickering over her right to leave on her journey of discovery, but now as they were taking their leave of one another, she was thinking only of how understanding and kind he had been when she had been alone in the world. "I love you Kate." She leant against his chest, wishing she felt able to return the sentiment. "Peter.....my name isn't Kate. It's Dana." "Call me when you get there okay?" "Of course I will, I'll call every day." They stood that way for quite a while before a cough from the doorway made them jump apart from one another. Mulder had his hands deep in the pockets of his jeans. "I don't like to interrupt, but we should make a move." Scully nodded. "We'll be right there." Mulder walked back out to the car, trying to dull and suppress his jealousy at seeing Scully in another man's arms. He leaned against the bonnet, until he saw them emerge. Whilst Scully secured the baby in the back seat of the car, Peter eyed Mulder carefully. "Take care of her." Mulder shrugged. "She used to be able to take of herself, I'm hoping to give her that ability back." Scully finished fiddling with the car seat and straightened up. There was an awkward moment where all three of them looked at one another. Peter broke the stand-off. "You mind giving us a little privacy to say goodbye?" Mulder minded very much, but nodded, and moved around the car to slip into the drivers seat. As he turned on the ignition, he tried not to think about what was going on outside the car. A long, sloppy, wet kiss? Nah, not in broad daylight on a public street. That wasn't Scully's style. She was next to him in the passenger seat a few moments later. As he looked over at her, he thought briefly about how many countless times he had turned his head to see her sitting alongside him in a car. Thousands, millions, who could tell? All he knew was that it seemed right. It was if the world had started turning again, after fifteen months of stasis. The missing part of his soul was back in place, so his life could now move forward. He coughed to clear his throat of the emotion he felt. "All set?" She turned to check on Keiran in the backseat and then gazed out of the rear window, where she could see Peter climbing the steps of their house to go back inside. "Yep. Let's go." Flight KL624 November 23rd, 1999 12.16pm Mulder yet out a yelp as the hostess trolley caught his ankle for the third time. The stewardess didn't offer an apology, but a tight smile instead. He scowled at her as she made her way along the plane. Flight attendants were usually more friendly towards him, even the male ones. They usually flirted and bantered with him. Looking around him, it wasn't difficult to see why he was being treated differently. Scully slept beside him, and in a small flight cot in front of them, Keiran dozed as deeply as his mother. Mulder concluded that they probably looked like the perfect all-American family. Mom, Dad and baby makes three. How wrong could you get? Scully shifted in her sleep and her head fell onto his shoulder. He felt warmed by the contact and relaxed in his seat. So what if people looked at them and assumed incorrectly? Scully wore a long skirt, and a cashmere sweater over a t-shirt, and with her small elegant features and sleek hair, she looked the picture of laid-back refinement. He felt privileged to be lending her his shoulder for a pillow. Keiran had been an absolute angel since they'd boarded. After a feed, he had fallen asleep and hadn't made a noise since. He felt stupidly proud of them both. A little voice inside his head told him not to get too attached to the feeling, but heck it was only for a few hours wasn't it? Being part of this pretend family felt good. He wanted someone to take their picture so that he could take it out of his wallet every time someone called him a lonely loser. He'd point to it and say, 'look, this could be me. I could be a husband and a father. I don't look out of place. I chose a different life for myself that's all'. Scully stirred, realised her sleeping position and looked up at him in embarrassment. "Sorry." He shrugged. "No problem. Glad I could be of use." She checked Keiran, and turned back to Mulder. "I can't believe he's sleeping through this. He must like flying. I thought he'd scream the whole way." "Don't speak too soon, we have a couple of hours yet." Scully took a sip of water. "So, what's the plan when we get there?" "Your mother wanted to meet us at the airport. I thought that might be a little overwhelming though, so I'm going to take you to her house." "Whereabouts do you live?" He stumbled a little over his answer. "Erm...Georgetown." He waited for a reaction from her that never came, and then realised how idiotic he was being. If she couldn't recall ever being Dana Scully, she was hardly going to say 'hey Mulder, didn't you used to live in Alexandria?'. Of course, sooner or later, he was going to have to come out and admit that he'd moved into her old apartment, and that he'd kept it exactly the same. All her pictures still hung on the walls, her bath oils and shampoos rested in exactly the same spots, and her suits still hung in the wardrobe. He'd closed the open lap-top on her desk to stop dust getting into the keyboard, and thrown out a couple of plants that had died, but other than that he'd kept it as it had been on the day she had disappeared, as if it were some kind of shrine. "Do you live alone?" The question pulled him out of his reverie. "Yes." She had looked away to gaze out the window and he realised that she had been fishing for an answer to something. She'd hadn't wanted to know whether he lived alone, but rather whether he lived with 'somebody'. Part of him wanted to lean over and tell her that since the day he had met her, she had been the only 'somebody' in his life. He didn't though. Two things stopped him. Firstly, he wasn't sure that she wouldn't turn around and laugh in his face, and secondly, it didn't seem a fair statement to make when she had made a new life with another man. Keiran started to cry and she looked back at Mulder with a smirk. "Looks like I did speak too soon." It was then that he touched her breast, by accident, of course. They both moved at the same time. Mulder leaned forward to see the baby in his cot as Scully was leaning down and across to get the bag that rested on the floor between their seats. His forearm accidentally brushed along her left breast. He drew it back quickly as if it had been set on fire, and leaned as far away from her as he could. He wondered whether he should apologise. He didn't want her to think he was some kind of pervert who'd been trying to cop a feel. He stole an embarrassed glance at her face to see if she was outraged, but she was merely tending to Keiran. Had she felt it? If she had, she was pretending it hadn't happened. He supposed that was fine by him, but he still felt like he'd violated her in some way. He told himself to calm down. It was an accident that was all. Like that time when they'd been on a stakeout at night and had stood together in a darkened house, he'd meant to put a hand to her lower back, but she'd been standing on a step and he'd touched her....well, never mind. It wasn't a good idea to thinking about her backside, or her left breast, no matter how good they both felt. *************** end of Chapter eight Further chapters will shortly arise like flukemen from the sewers of my mind. Feedback to: caroline.o@virgin.net ************************ REMEMBER ME? (9/22) BY CAROLINE O Margaret Scully's Residence November 23rd, 1999 4.20pm Any awkwardness that might have arisen from the first meeting between Scully and her mother was quickly dispelled by Maggie's constant stream of chatter. She hugged her daughter to her briefly, stroked her face once, and then let her go, as if sensing that any more contact would be embarrassing for Dana. Then she seated them in the kitchen and proceeded to make tea, while asking a stream of questions about their journey, about how Mulder had found her, about Keiran, and even the weather in Canada. Scully answered all the queries at first in a cautious voice, but the more Maggie talked, the more she began to warm to her, and feel comfortable in her company. Mulder filled in any gaps in the conversation, but they were few and far between. Keiran woke from his afternoon nap and the first thing he saw was the friendly face of his newly-discovered grandmother. Maggie looked at Scully almost shyly. "Would it be okay if I picked him up?" "Sure." Mulder watched as she lifted the baby from his seat and cuddled him to her chest. He didn't put up any kind of protest at being held by this stranger, and instead shot Maggie a dozy, half-awake smile. Mulder felt almost jealous. He'd spent a lot of time with Keiran lately and had never got anything out of the child except glares or tears. Maggie looked thrilled and kissed his cheek. "Oh Dana, he's so adorable. He has your eyes. I think he needs a diaper change though." Scully got up from the table to do it, but Maggie held onto the baby. "Would you mind if I did it?" Scully smiled. "No, I don't mind. If you're feeling brave enough." "I am. Is his diaper bag in the hall?" "Yep." She disappeared leaving Scully and Mulder looking at each other across the kitchen table. Mulder got to his feet. "Why don't we take a walk around?" They wandered into the living room, where Scully went to over to a shelf which contained around four of five family pictures. She identified what must of been herself and her sister as children. There was a picture of a man in his thirties, with two small boys. She guessed that was her brother. There was a picture of the woman she now knew as her mother. She was a young woman in this photograph, standing in front of a ship, with a man's arm slung around her shoulders. She supposed the man was her father. He wore a naval uniform and a proud smile. Another picture was of a man and a woman and a young baby, and at the end of the row was a picture of her and Mulder. They wore weary half-smiles, casual clothes, and were sitting on a porch which could very well be at the back of this house. Mulder came up behind her. "Hey, look at that, I didn't know I'd made the Scully hall of fame." "When was that taken?" He had to think back to recall the day, then remembered that it had been a few days after she had been released from hospital following her remission. She had been staying with her mother and he had stopped by to see how she was. Mrs Scully had begged them for a photograph. He had felt like an idiot posing for the camera, but Maggie had been adamant that they should record Scully's recovery for posterity. He thought about lying to her, but knew he had put off too many dark secrets already. "You had just been very ill, and you were staying here with your mother. I stopped by to see how you were doing. It was a couple of years ago now." "What was wrong with me?" "You'd had a tumour. A cancer on the brain." She looked from the photograph to him in alarm. Her face showing her shock. He hastened to reassure her. "You're fine now. You had the complete all clear months before you went missing." "What....did I....was there an operation?" "No, it wasn't necessary. A cure was found. You're fine now, you really are." "But Mulder...." He put a finger to her lips. "We'll talk about that another time. Not here, not now. It upsets your mother. She's been reunited with you today. Let her be happy about that." She looked towards the door to make sure her mother wasn't there, before she questioned him further. "Did I have chemotherapy?" He nodded. "You had some, yes." "That explains it then." He was genuinely puzzled. "Explains what?" "Why you asked me those strange questions about Keiran when you came to my house in Canada. You were shocked I had him because you thought I couldn't have children, because of the chemo." He elected to change the subject, rather than tell her that chemotherapy didn't explain his reasons for suspecting she was infertile at all. "Scully, is anything familiar. This house, your mother?" She shook her head sadly. "No." Her gaze returned to the photographs, and he walked away to give her time on her own to examine them more thoroughly. Mrs Scully arrived a couple of minutes later with a clean-diapered Keiran. She saw Dana looking at the photographs and passed the baby to Mulder quickly before he could object. She put a hand on her daughter's shoulder. "Let me tell you who everybody is." While Maggie went through the introductions, Mulder found himself struggling with the squirming child. He held him up and jigged him up and down for a while, hoping to amuse him. The baby's chin wobbled and his forehead creased into a frown. Knowing he was about to cry, Mulder cringed. "Oh, no. Come on, cheer up. I'm not that bad am I?" Keiran let out a wail of protest and Scully looked around at him with a smile. Mulder shrugged as Keiran began to scream. "I told you, he doesn't like me." She took the baby from him and pointed to the couch. "Sit there, and don't move. I'll be back in a moment." He did as he was told and sank into the couch, Maggie was looking at him with a wry smile. "I'll give Dana a hand. She might not know where everything is." He watched them both go into the kitchen. Feeling like a bit of a fool for not even being able to hold a baby for a couple of minutes. By the time Scully emerged from the kitchen, he had shut his eyes and leaned back further into the couch, hoping to get a few moments rest while they dealt with Keiran. "Mulder. Wake up." He became alert and sat up straighter to find that the baby was once again being shoved at him. "I don't think." "Its a scientific experiment. Hold him in your lap." He sighed and did as he was told. Scully handed him a bottle of warm milk. "I'm not really used to babies. I'm not sure this is a good idea." Scully just shook her head at him. "Go on. Give it to him." Keiran was still kicking his legs and arms about, protesting about something. Mulder put the bottle to his lips and was amazed as the infant stopped wailing immediately, sucked the teat into his tiny mouth and proceeded to suck on it. Sitting beside them, Scully spoke in a gentle voice. "Tip the bottle up Mulder, it makes it easier for him. And, relax a little. He knows when somebody's tense and he doesn't like it." Doing as he was told, Mulder eased his grip on the baby and just let his head rest on his upper arm. Keiran seemed to snuggle down comfortably and sucked on the bottle harder. "See, he likes you just fine now." "Yeah, well your mother didn't feed him and he didn't cry at her." Scully smirked. "Well, she smiled at him and gave him a big hug. She didn't stare at him and try to bounce him up and down like a basketball." Keiran was looking up at him with huge blue eyes, staring at him as if he were memorising his features. Then, with a tiny hand he reached up to touch Mulder's fingers where they held his bottle. Instinctively, Mulder stuck out his little finger, and was delighted when the baby gripped it firmly, as if he intended to never let go. Getting to her feet, Scully looked down at them. "You okay to finish this, while I go and talk to Mag...my Mother?" Not taking his eyes from Keiran, Mulder nodded. "Yeah, I think I've got the hang of it now. Is he going to drink the whole bottle?" "Absolutely. He never refuses food." X Files Office FBI Headquarters November 23rd, 1999 7.55 p.m Mulder was surprised to find Diana still in the office and hard at work. He had been hoping to avoid her. She looked up at him, seemingly more pleased to see him than he was to see her. "Fox. Hello." He shook his head and crossed to his desk. "You know, I really do prefer Mulder. Or Agent Mulder even." "You never used to mind." He began shifting through the collection of envelopes and papers that had been dropped on his desk in his absence. "Yeah, well that was then and this is now. A lot of things have changed." She stopped her work and crossed the room to take the chair opposite his and regarded him across the desk. "The tests you've ordered. They're for the baby aren't they? You think he might be a hybrid?" A lump rose in Mulder's throat as he thought about how soft the skin of Keiran's cheek had felt when he'd stroked it during his feeding, and how small and weightless he had seemed. "Hybrid's Agent Fowley? That's pure science fiction." "Emily was a hybrid. They took Scully's ova and used it to create her, using another woman's womb as the host. Yet Emily was to ill to survive without constant medical attention. So this time when they took Scully, they tried something different. They took her own inseminated ovum and put it back into the uterus, hoping that it would decrease the health risks." Mulder held up a hand. "You have quite a vivid imagination Fowley. But I'm not sure that Scully was 'taken'. I don't know what happened to her in the months she was missing. Keiran could have come about quite naturally." "Come on Mulder, share this with me. I'm as fascinated by the prospect of an human-alien hybrid as you are. It would be a medical phenomenon." Mulder stood up and collected the papers into a pile, which he shoved under his arm. He didn't want to remain in this office a moment longer. "Medical phenomenon or not, he's still a baby whose mother loves him. I don't plan to lose sight of that, but there are others who would. I plan to protect him." Diana shook her head. "Oh Mulder, don't get too attached. This kid is an experiment." "To you, maybe. To Dana Scully, he's a son." He felt like his body were on fire as he stormed out of the room. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt this angry, or the last time he had felt tempted to hit a woman. When he did recall it, he was in the elevator. The last conversation he'd had with Diana before she'd left for Europe all those years ago. Yeah, he could of swung for her that day as well. By the time he'd got down to the parking lot, he'd calmed down a lot. He even managed a weak smile when he saw Skinner, who was leaning against his car. "Hello Sir." "Agent Mulder. I heard you were in the building. How's Scully and the baby?" "They're fine. For now, anyway. I'm not sure how safe they are in the long run. Scully's staying with her mother." "I came down here to talk to you because I'm not sure how safe my office is." "Has something happened?" Skinner nodded slightly. "I was approached while I was eating my lunch outside and watching the preparations for the Millenium fireworks." "I hope you told them you weren't looking for a date." Smirking, Skinner continued. "He told me that he was too scared to approach you himself. He said you were being watched." Mulder looked around. "I'm not sure that I am, but I think Scully is, and that worries me." "Well, this man wasn't so much worried about Scully, but that in helping her, you were taking your mind off the job." "Oh yeah?" "He said something about a date that was set. That it was drawing near, and that Scully was distracting you from it. I must admit, I thought he was one of the crackpots that seem to be growing in number daily." "Mmm, the end of the world is nigh. Half the population is preparing for a hell of a party and the other is convinced we're all going to hell." "Yes, but this man knew you, and he knew Scully. He believes that you need to be watching them." Mulder considered his bosses words carefully. "I don't think I can save the World, but I might just be able to help Scully and her baby and that's what I intend to do." "I understand. Just don't take your eyes completely off the ball. You seem to be a key player in their plans. If its possible that you could do some good Mulder, then you have to at least try." Laughing, Mulder shook his head. "Who the hell do you think I am, Flash Gordon?" He got into his car and drove away, leaving Skinner staring after him with a concerned expression. **************** end of part 9 REMEMBER ME? (10/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ***************************************** Margaret Scully's Residence November 24th, 1999 8.16am "So, why don't you ask me what you're dying to ask me?" Scully glanced up from her breakfast in surprise. Maggie looked at her across the kitchen table with a smile. "I can always tell when you have something on your mind." Pushing her plate aside, Scully sighed. "It's just....well, I felt embarrassed asking Mulder." "Something about yourself?" "Yes, well Mulder and I." She felt herself blushing a little, and then berated herself for being so coy about it. It was something she had to know. "He said we were friends, and partners, but he seems to know me so well...." "You were wondering if you were romantically involved with him?" Scully leaned forward. "Yes." "Well, I'd love to know the answer to that one myself." "You...you don't know." Maggie reached across the table and patted her daughters hand. "You were so...closed off back then. I had to drag personal information out of you. Things would happen, and I wouldn't get to hear about them until months later." Ashamed, Scully bent her head. "We weren't close then?" "Oh, we were. As close as we could be. I think you used to shut yourself off because you didn't want me to worry. You got so used to not discussing things with me, that even the important stuff didn't get passed on." Maggie took a sip of coffee and watched Dana's face for a while before she continued. "All I know is that Fox Mulder cared for you deeply. He'd do anything for you, and I think you felt the same way about him." Scully bit her lip. "He's taking me to my old apartment today. He thinks it might help jog some memories. It could be easier to talk to him if Keiran wasn't around. If you can't, I'd understand, but I was wondering if you could possibly take care of him for me." Maggie's face broke into a huge smile and she placed a hand against her chest, over her heart. "I would love to. I'm flattered that you trust me with him." "Well, you are his grandmother, after all." Georgetown November 24th, 1999 9.15am Scully had the car window open and was leaning out of it, seemingly not caring about the freezing weather and the wind that was whipping her hair into an unruly mess. It was something that Mulder had never seen the very proper Agent Scully do. "That feel good?" She smiled at him and closed the window. "Just waking myself up a little. I think I need to be alert today." She brushed her hair back into some semblance of order. "Peter always does that on his way to work." He gritted his teeth, and his hold on the steering wheel tightened involuntarily. "You always speak of him so fondly, you must be very happy together." She was quiet for a long time. He kept his eyes on the road and dared not look at her, afraid of what he might see in her face. When she spoke, he almost jumped in surprise. "Happy? I....he's a good man. He treats me wonderfully, apart from an annoying tendency to worry about me as if I were a child. But I suppose that stems from the way we met. I was so unable to help myself that I was forced to rely on him. Yet now, in fact, ever since I had Keiran, I've felt a strength returning. That's put a strain on things. I'm no longer so utterly reliant on him, and I think he misses that." She sighed and continued. "I can't be a Concannon housewife for the rest of my life. It's fine at the moment because Keiran is a full-time job. He won't be forever though, and then, well, I'll need something else. So, while we may be content now, I can't see the future being so harmonious." Mulder relaxed slightly. "Maybe you'll work something out. Perhaps he'll learn to let go and let you find a life outside your home. You do have a medical degree, that's an option." She chuckled. "Yep. Maybe, but...to tell the truth, when you told me I used to be an FBI agent, I found that very appealing. That's the sort of thing that could keep my mind occupied and active." "I don't think the Federal Bureau of Investigation has a branch in Concannon Scully." She fell quiet and leaned back in her seat, her face thoughtful and pensive. He opted for a lighter topic of conversation. "So, did you and your mother have a nice evening?" "Oh yeah. I had the complete Scully history." "Abridged version?" "Oh no, the complete unedited works. I think it was two a.m. before I got to bed. It was nice though, and I probably know more about my family than I ever did before." He pulled into the parking space allotted to her apartment and looked over at her with a nervous smile. "Well, we're here." She looked up at the building, scanning its exterior and then offered him a smile that was just as nervous as his own. Dana Scully's apartment Georgetown November 24th, 1999 He turned the key and shoved the door open, and then stepped back so she could enter first. Walking in, she looked around at the furniture and fittings and then glanced over at Mulder who had stepped in behind her and closed the door. "Well, I had pretty good taste." Mulder was leaning against the door. "Don't rush it Scully. You're not even giving it a chance. Sit down and feel the place. Try and remember." Her forehead creased into a frown and her voice raised in annoyance. It was the first time he had seen her angry in a long while. "Do you think I don't want to remember? I try every day, every minute of every hour to remember something, anything." She sank into the couch. He didn't venture any more words, knowing he had pushed her and said the wrong thing. "What on the earth makes you think I could recall this anyway? If I can't remember you or my own Mother, how the hell am I supposed to find something familiar in walls and furniture?" He walked over to the couch and sat on the other end of it, still not knowing how to take back the words that had upset her. She looked over at him, her tone softening. "Why is everything still here anyway? Didn't you all think I was dead?" Mulder starred at the fireplace and fidgeted. "I took it over, kind of. I thought, just in case you were found, that you should have something to come back to." He felt her hand come to rest over his. She gave his fingers a squeeze. "I'm sorry, I feel like an ingrate now." "Hey it wasn't totally unselfish. This is a nice place, and you know, my old apartment was starting to smell bad." She chuckled and he was somewhat thrilled when she left her hand resting on top of his. "You live here?" He nodded. "Well, 'live' is stretching it. I crash here when I reach the point of exhaustion. I spend a lot of time at the office." "Looking for me?" Embarrassed, he starred at his feet. "Yes, I've spent a lot of time looking for you." He pulled his hand away when the contact became too much and he became frightened of what he might blurt out and reveal. "Why don't you go and explore? You never know, it might help." She nodded and got to her feet. The kitchen didn't tell her much about Dana Scully at all. It did tell her, however, that Fox Mulder had probably cleaned it hastily this morning before he'd picked her up. The surfaces were smeared with a cleaning agent that hadn't properly been wiped off and the bin held a pizza box, a piece of mouldy cheese and a squashed carton. The sink smelled as if sour milk had been poured down it. On the pinboard was a postcard from Hawaii that was signed Bill and Tara. It looked a couple of years old at least. She moved down the hall and into the bathroom, which was crammed with feminine oddities. A back scrubber decorated with a bow, plenty of bubble baths and oils, shampoos and conditioners. She smiled to herself. She had been a bathing freak then, and she was now. She still liked nothing better than buying all sorts of pampering products and locking herself in the bathroom to test them. Opening the cabinet, she found a wealth of medical supplies, and squashed into a corner were Mulder's things. His shaving soap and razor, all-in-one shampoo and hair gel. A toothbrush and deodorant. A condom. Her eyes widened at that and she took it out to examine it, only to find out that it was four years out of date. So he wasn't getting any, and hadn't been for a long time. What did that tell her Shutting the cabinet she wandered into her bedroom and studied the books on the shelf with a frown. Medical research and science texts, criminal psychology studies, a bible and few works of heavy literature. Yep, she'd been a real fun gal. Only one book seemed out of place. It was entitled 'Your Dreams and Their Meanings'. She took it out and opened the first page. It was inscribed in bold, feminine handwritting. 'Dana. A little light reading for you. Happy 29th birthday. Missy'. Scully shut the book quickly, before the tears that threatened could appear. Her sister who had died so cruelly in her place had apparently been as different from her as two people could possibly be, yet they had shared a closeness. Her Mother had told her many stories about Melissa last night, and she had found herself wishing so hard that her sister had been there to tell them herself. Moving to the wardrobe, she threw the doors open to find a stack of what she assumed were Mulder's dirty clothes on the floor. It looked as if they had been bundled in quickly to hide them from sight. What she assumed were her own clothes hung neatly from hangers. Many of them were still wrapped in dry cleaning plastic. The labels made her start a little in surprise. Betty Jackson, Donna Karan, even an Armani. Agent Scully hadn't skimped on the threads. She looked down at the jeans and sweater she was wearing now. Of course, she didn't have much call to wear anything much smarter these days. If she did, it would only end up with baby puke down it, and she always felt guilty about spending Peter's money, even though he insisted it wasn't a problem. There had been times though when she'd found herself slowing down in department stores and admiring the designer suits with interest. Old habits died hard, so they said; perhaps they even survived amnesia. She lay down on the bed and stared up at the ceiling. It was there that Mulder found her a few minutes later. He tried not to think about the times that he had laid on that bed in the last year and wished for her to be lying beside him. He had cried into the pillow that her head was resting on now. He cleared his throat. "So?" She opened her eyes and looked over at him. "So. I've discovered that I used to give myself a huge clothing allowance and that I was particularly fond of beige and black." "Well, we FBI agents don't like to stand out in a crowd." She offered him a soft smile. "I've also discovered that you're a very kind and thoughtful man." He was immediately embarrassed and looked away. She sat up. "Mulder, you kept this place for me. I don't think you've moved a single thing you didn't have to. Meanwhile, you continually searched for me, and when you found me...well you've been so considerate and generous in trying to help me. I want to thank you." He shrugged. "Really Scully, there's no need, and don't be fooled into thinking that I'm a wonderful, perfect person. There have been times in the past when I've treated you without respect, when I've disregarded your feelings, and been selfish and unsympathetic. I've ridiculed you and your work, and....." She interrupted him by laughing and holding up a hand. "Okay enough, don't ruin my good opinion of you totally. If we were partners for five years I'm sure there were times when we both behaved badly." "I'm more guilty than you believe me." He gestured toward the living room. "Come back into the other room Scully. I've got a heck of a story to tell you, and it can't be put off any longer." She got to her feet and walked towards him. As they moved down the hall, he placed a hand on the small of her back and it felt so reassuring and comforting that she almost lost the nervousness she felt about his 'story'. Once there, a photograph caught her eye and she moved to the shelf above the fireplace to look at it. A pretty little blonde girl smiled into the camera lens, a birthday banner above her head and a cake lit by candles beneath her. She picked the unframed picture up and held it for Mulder to see. "Who's this?" Mulder was sure his heart stopped for a moment before he could answer. "Scully, I should start at the beginning. Sit down." She did, but with the photograph still held in her right hand. He licked his lips. "When I was twelve and my sister was eight, she was abducted......" The story lasted a couple of hours, and by the time he had finished, Scully was looking at Emily's picture in horror and grief. Tears were swimming in her eyes. Mulder had recounted everything that he considered important to her present circumstances. Her being assigned to work with him by Blevins, her abduction and return, the chip in her neck, their discovery of records in a abandoned mine premises, the bounty hunter, the clones, the consortium, the harvesting of her ova, the bees and the virus, her cancer and cure. Her further abduction and their escape from Antarctica, all that and more. He poured it all out and she had listened. Not interrupting once, except to get up and get a glass of water. Now that he had finished he got off the couch and moved to kneel in front of her. "Scully...." She jumped up and moved away from him. "You're crazy. Everything you've just told me is insane." He turned round, still on his knees, to look up at her. "I know it sounds that way, but it all happened." "An alien-human hybrid, its ridiculous." She held up the picture. "This child looks perfectly normal." She was crying in earnest now. Huge drops of tears rolled down her cheeks. He got up and moved closer to perhaps hold her but she moved away from him again, heading for the door. "I want you to take me back to Maggie's." He caught up with her and grabbed her forearm, perhaps a little too hard, spinning her round to face him. "Listen to me. If you can't take my word on all this, I'll take you to a man who's an Assistant Director of the FBI. He'll verify it for you." She sobbed and look at him with huge, frightened eyes. "You think that I was taken by these people again?" "Maybe, and maybe their responsible for your memory loss. With their knowledge and scientific abilities they'd easily be able to wipe out your past." She gulped back another sob, and seamed to calm down a little. "So that would mean that Keiran could be what this child was?" "Believe me Scully, I'm praying and hoping that's not true. I've set up an appointment with a doctor that I trust. I want us to take Keiran there to run some tests on him." She shook her head, throwing off her hysteria and becoming angry instead. "You should have told me about this the moment you found me again. If he's ill, if his life is threatened, I had a fucking right to know." Astounded by her language, he let go of her arm. She had roared at him like a lion protecting her young. She rubbed the spot where he had held her. "Take me back to my Mother's." He let out a curse himself as he watched her leave the apartment. ********************* End of part 10 ********************** REMEMBER ME? (11/22) BY CAROLINE O Offices of Dr Alfred Penn Washington DC November 25th, 1999 12.12 pm They sat in a waiting room. Mulder by the door, and Scully as far away from him as she could get, on the opposite side of the room. Keiran, who had screamed till he had turned blue when Doctor Penn had inserted needles, and prodded and poked him all over, now sat happily on his mother's lap, laughing as she tickled his stomach and blew into his ear. Scully hadn't made as much noise as her son had during the examination, but she had seemed just as distressed about it. Her forehead had been creased into a constant frown and her eyes had filled with pain, as if she were undergoing the tests herself. Moving to take the chair next to her, Mulder ventured to soften the anger that had been directed at him since their confrontation in her apartment the day before. She had hardly spoken a word to him. She had agreed to Keiran's examination in hard, clipped tones. "Scully, I know I should have told you earlier. I just didn't know how to go about it. Like you said, its all insane." "If it was just something about me, I'd understand. But this is something that could threaten my son's life." He nodded and leaned back in his chair, looking at his watch. "It shouldn't be long now." They fell silent for a while, before he felt the need to say something else. "Scully. If Keiran is sick, or if anybody has done anything to harm him or you, I won't rest until I've found out who's responsible and brought them to justice. If there's a cure that needs to be found, I'll find it. I'll do everything I can to make sure your son leads a long and healthy life." As he finished speaking, the door to the doctor's office opened, and Penn appeared, looking down at them both with an unreadable expression. "If you'd like to come in, I have some of the results for you." He went back into his room, expecting them to follow. Mulder got to his feet and placed an hand on Scully's arm to help her up. He thought she might shrug it off, but instead she leaned on him slightly, and glanced up at him, as if looking for reassurance. She stood and balanced Keiran on her hip, regarding Mulder with a cool compassion. "However Keiran came about, whatever was done to me, I don't blame you for it. You shouldn't blame yourself either. The only thing you did wrong was to keep this from me." After digesting her words, he indicated towards the office. "Let's go in shall we?" She went first and he put a hand to the small of her back to guide her, only to find a small, chubby, baby's leg instead. Inside they sat opposite Doctor Penn. "Alfred, I want to thank you for clearing your schedule to do these tests for us." The small, slight doctor smiled at Mulder's comment. "When Melvin Frohike tells me something is important, I know that it must be the kind of thing that's worth dropping a mornings surgery for, and when he tells me he has a child that may have been created partly from alien DNA, well, that kind of thing fascinates me enough to give up a weeks surgery if I have to." Scully cleared her throat. "Doctor Penn, I hope you don't think I'm being rude, but how qualified are you to process the results of these tests?" He leaned forward in her chair. "Ms Scully, I may look like your average paediatrician, but long before I started on this career, I was involved in some high-level government medical projects." He took an envelope from his desk. "This contains the results of the bloodwork I did. I had them couriered to the lab and got an old friend of mine over there to put a rush on them." He took the papers out and looked over at Mulder. "Well, I guess this is bad news for you." Mulder's whole body froze and he swallowed hard. He couldn't look at Scully or Keiran. "It is?" Doctor Penn nodded. "Yes. This child isn't proof that the government have been carrying out alien-human hybrid experiments. There's nothing strange about his blood or genetic make-up at all." Mulder let out a short laugh of joy. "Thank you Doctor Penn. That isn't bad news at all." The doctor's face lit up in a smile. "It isn't?" "No, it was exactly what we wanted to hear." He felt he could look round at her now, only to find that Scully still wore a pensive expression. She stroked her sons head, and leaned forward in her chair. "Is he healthy though? Is there anything at all wrong with him?" "No Ms Scully. He's a normal, healthy little boy, and very handsome too." Scully's face split into the largest, brightest smile Mulder had ever seen on her. The beauty of it made his limbs go weak. Ten minutes later they had said goodbye to Doctor Penn and were heading for Mulder's car. "Well, now that's over we can get down to the business of trying to jog your memory. I thought we'd stop by our office, and then...." She stopped him with a hand on his arm. "Mulder. I've had enough, I want to go home." "Okay. I guess its been a bad day. I'll take you back to your mothers, and we can do the other stuff tomorrow." Looking at him sadly, she shook her head. "No. I mean I want to go home. Back to Concannon." Leaving him standing on the sidewalk in surprise, she walked towards the parking lot ahead of him. He had to take a few long strides before he had caught up with her. "You can't do that. There's too much left unexplained." "I thought long and hard about everything last night. I'm willing to leave things unexplained. I'm going to get a flight back in the morning. I'm sorry, I know I said I'd come for a whole week, and I appreciate what you've tried to do for me, and for arranging these tests to make sure Keiran is okay, but....I don't want to know any more about who I used to be. From what you told me yesterday, the more I know, the more danger I might be in." He raised his voice in anger at her. "You're running away." She looked him straight in the eye. "Yes. I am." "Well, then, you're a lesser person than you used to be." They reached the car and he opened it for her so that she could store Keiran in the back. The baby had fallen asleep and Mulder looked at his tiny face as it rested against the side of the chair, wondering if it would be the last time he saw the child. Scully secured the babyseat and got into the front of the car without looking at Mulder. She could feel his anger, and didn't blame him for it. He got into the drivers side, but instead of starting the engine, he looked over at her. "I'm sorry, that remark was uncalled for." She shrugged. "I'm running out on you. Perhaps its very called for, but Mulder, you have to understand that I have very different priorities now." She inclined her head towards the back of the car where Keiran dozed. "I don't want to get involved in anything that might put my life in jeopardy. I need to be around for him." He looked out of the window for a few moments, before he turned back to face her. "You shouldn't make this decision now. Sleep on it. Its been a stressful day." She sighed. "I've made my choice Mulder. I decided last night, that no matter what we found out about Keiran, I was going to take him as far away from this horror story of a life you say I led as I possibly can." Residence of Margaret Scully November 26th, 1999 9.10am Scully looked at the bags in the hall. They seemed to taunt her. Only two days ago they had been sitting by her door in Concannon, waiting to be taken on her journey into her past life. Yet already they were packed again, and waiting to flee back to the sleepy Canadian town. Her mother was in the other room calling a cab to take her to the airport. Maggie had offered to take her there herself, but Dana hadn't wanted any emotional scenes at the departure gate. She opened the front door and wandered outside, shivering in the cold winter air. All last night and this morning she had been expecting Mulder to arrive and try to talk her into not going. She wouldn't have let him of course, but it would have been nice to have had the chance to say goodbye. Yesterday he had dropped her off and driven away without so much as a backward glance. Maggie arrived to stand beside her on the front porch. "Maybe you can call and explain it to him when you get there. Or perhaps write him a letter." Scully bit her lip and nodded. "You'll come and visit won't you?" Smiling, her mother leaned over and kissed her cheek. "Of course, I told you, right after the new year." Airport Washington DC November 27th, 1999 11.40am Mulder's feet pounded along the terminal floor as he raced to gate 42. His heart was in his chest. The plane was going to take off in twenty minutes. He pushed a man who was in his way, and didn't stop to apologise. He hadn't got time. He rounded the corner and breathed a sigh of relief. She hadn't boarded yet. She stood, with Keiran braced on her hip, at the end of a line of people waiting to have their tickets checked. She looked up at him as if sensing his presence and he smiled at her in greeting. She left the line and walked towards him. He indicated a spot a few feet away where they could talk. "Scully, I wanted to say goodbye." "Yeah, I did too. I'm glad you came. I was going to call you when I got home. Mulder...." "No hang on, let me talk." He laid a hand on her upper arm. "I'll miss you Scully. I have missed you, since the day you were taken, but I understand your reasons for leaving." "I have to keep him safe." Mulder looked at Keiran who starred up at him with big blue eyes. He smiled at the baby and earned a toothless grin in return. "I know you do. I think I'd go too. If I had something this precious to protect." He ruffled Keiran's hair. "What I don't want is for you to go away thinking that everything that has happened to us has been bad. The other day I had to tell you about all the horrors we endured, but that wasn't the whole sum of our partnership, our friendship. We went for a hell of a ride Scully, some it was frightening and unbearable, but parts of the ride were a lot of fun. I want you to know that." She nodded. "It's been wonderful meeting you Mulder. I now have some idea of where I came from and who I am. Thank you for that. Its also nice to have found out that there was somebody out there that cared about me. There were times when I wondered if I'd left anybody behind at all. Now I know there was you, and my Mother." He swallowed hard, and thought carefully about what he wanted to say. "I'll always care, and if you ever need me, for anything. I can be with you. I'm on the other end of the phone, or I can be by your side in a matter of hours. Remember that." She looked up at him with huge, wet eyes. He couldn't resist the need to hold her any longer and dragged her into his arms, only to have Keiran let out a wail of protest at being stuck between them. They pulled apart and smiled wryly at one another. "Scully, keeping away from me and your old life will keep you safer, but just because you're up there in your sleepy little town, don't think that they aren't watching. Be aware." An attendant from the gate approached them. "Ma'am are you boarding this flight? If so, you'll have to do so now. The gate's closing." "Okay. I'll be right there." To Mulder's amazement she turned back to him, put a hand behind his neck, and pulled his face down to hers. She pressed her soft lips to his for just a few seconds, but in that time he managed to memorise the feel and taste of her, and he longed for it again the moment she backed away from him. With another sad smile, she turned to walk to the gate. As he watched her go, he wondered whether the memory of one kiss could sustain him for a lifetime. He waited in the departure gate until he saw her plane take off. The attendant who had been checking the tickets looked at him sympathetically. She spoke, obviously thinking that he had been bidding goodbye to his wife and child. "Don't worry, You'll see them soon, right?" He turned and offered her a fake smile. "Yeah, right." Flight Mk491 November 27th, 1999 12.10pm She settled Keiran on her lap with a set of plastic keys to play with and leaned back against the seat with a heavy sigh. Her mind was replaying the kiss she had given Mulder in the airport again and again. It had been a nice impulse to give into, but had it been the right thing to do? Had she overstepped a boundary that they had not crossed before? Or had it been a poor imitation of lovers clenches they'd once shared? She still didn't know what Mulder had once meant to her. She tried to stop thinking about it when her mind assaulted her with an image that made her whole body shudder. It was of Mulder leaning down to kiss her. Not in the airport, but in another place. A corridor, at night. His chin wore a wealth of stubble and he held her in place for his coming kiss with a hand on each side of her face. That was it. Just a fleeting recollection. A memory. She suddenly sat bolt upright in her seat and Keiran looked up at her in alarm. She hugged him to her and kissed his forehead. "Its okay sweetheart, Mommy just remembered something. That's all." ************************ end of part 11 *********************** REMEMBER ME? (12/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ***************************************** TWO WEEKS LATER Department Store Watergate Mall Washington DC December 15th, 1999 1.24pm All around him fairy lights twinkled, and Christmas Carols blared out from hidden speakers. Tinsel and holly decorated every aisle of the store and screaming or squealing children were everywhere. It was his own personal idea of hell. Mulder was in the toy section perusing his options. There were video games, action figures, board games, footballs and rollerblades, bikes and chemistry sets. It was frankly overwhelming, surely there hadn't been this much choice when he'd been a kid. An assistant appeared at his side as if from nowhere. "You look like you could use a little help." He turned around to shrug at the pretty blonde sales girl. "I'm looking for a gift." She smiled, revealing a row of sparkling white teeth. "Well, its that time of the year." "Its for my friend's son." "Right. How old is he?" Mulder thought for a moment. "Um...four months." The girl laughed and Mulder wondered if she were flirting with him, surely not, he was old enough to be her father. "I think these things might be a little advanced for him, we have a baby section over in the corner. Let me take you over there." "Right. Sure." He picked up a softball mitt and bat and smiled at the assistant. "I think I might take these as well anyway. Couldn't hurt to start him young." The girl helped him pick out a couple of things that were more suitable for a baby. It was when she was escorting him towards the pay desk that she stopped him cold with a few well chosen words. "Agent Mulder be careful. The date is set and now that it's approaching they won't have much need for you. They won't think twice about killing you now." He looked at her in amazement. "Do I know you, are you part of....." She put a hand on his arm. "I just wanted to warn you. Try and survive. Maybe they'll be a future even after the date. Perhaps they'll be work for you to do." She turned quickly and mingled into the crowds of Christmas shoppers. Within moments she was out of sight. He looked around at the other assistants in the store and realised that they were wearing totally different uniforms to the one his bearer of bad tidings had been. Confused and disturbed he joined the end of a long queue to pay for Keiran's Christmas present. X Files Office FBI Headquarters Washington DC December 15th, 1999 2.15pm Diana Fowley looked at his shopping bags as he walked into the office. "Have fun at the Mall?" "Not really. Any calls?" "Some guy from the VCS called wondering if you could look over a profile for him." Mulder put the bags down. "That's it?" "Yep." She went back to her work, but Mulder had a feeling she was watching him out of the corner of her eye. "Coffee?" Diana nodded and indicated her cup on the side of the desk. Her smile was nervous and forced as he took the cup and went out into the hall. Instead of making his way to the coffee machine though, he stood a few feet away from the open office door and listened. He heard the click of a phone receiver being picked up and of her dialing a number. He only heard her say two words before she slammed the phone down. "He's back". Mulder got the coffee and went back into the office. He gave Diana her cup and perched on the end of his desk while he drank his. "Speaking of my adventures at the mall. While I was in the toy section somebody warned me to watch my back. They said my life might be in danger." Diana looked shocked at first, then smiled. "You do attract the strangest people." "Yeah. Don't I just. So, Diana, why do you want to ruin your career down here in the basement with me?" She leaned back in her chair and looked at him warily. "I don't think of it as ruining my career." "No? Maybe you think of it as saving your own skin." "What are you talking about?" The ringing of the phone interrupted the tense conversation. Mulder answered it without breaking eye contact with Diana. His stare was accusing her of something. He wasn't quite sure what it was, but he knew it wasn't good. "Mulder." His attention was immediately off Diana and onto the voice on the other end of the line. It was a voice that he hadn't heard in over two weeks. A voice that he missed like crazy. "Mulder. He's dead." Horror cut through him as he imagined the small still body of her child, and her pale, grave face as she attended his funeral. "Are you there Mulder?" "Yes, I'm sorry. I'm here Scully." "He's dead Mulder. Peter. He's dead." Relief washed over him, but he tried not to let it affect his voice. "What happened?" "We we're out shopping. Christmas shopping. We were in a store when there were these loud bangs, and I looked around at Peter. Oh God, Mulder, I tried to stop the blood, but it was just too much.....he'd been shot in the heart." The stress and grief in her voice permeated every word. He could tell she was holding back sobs, determined to break the news to him without falling apart. "Okay Scully. I'm going to be there just as soon as I can." "Thank you. I'd like that. You're the first person I thought to call. I didn't know what else to do." "Where are you now?" "At the hospital." "Are you and Keiran okay?" "Yeah...I'm just...." Her voice trailed away to nothing. He closed his eyes and felt her pain. "You're in shock Scully, but you have to try and hold it together until I get there, please. I want you to stay inside the hospital okay? Don't go outside. Don't go home." "I won't." "Good. Did they catch who did this?" "No, he disappeared like he wasn't even there." "I'm sorry." "Was it them Mulder? Did they do this?" "Maybe. That's why I want you to stay right where you are. I'll see you soon." "Okay." He hung up to see Diana looking at him with interest. "Is something wrong?" He collected his bags and headed for the door. "Peter Roberts was shot dead this morning." "My God, really?" "There's no need to look so surprised Diana." He left her standing in the middle of the office, and as he walked away, he thought, or hoped, that it might be the last time he ever saw her. In the parking lot a man dressed in blue overalls had the bonnet of Mulder's car up and a pair of wire clippers in his hand. He snipped the brake wires quickly, put the bonnet down and walked away, pleased that his mission had gone off without incident. St Mary's Hospital Concannon December 15th, 1999 11.54pm He could hardly believe that he was heading down a hospital corridor, searching for Scully once again. At least she wasn't a patient this time. A receptionist had directed him to a room they called the 'bereavement suite', but Mulder was damned if he could find it. "Um, Sir are you looking for Mrs Roberts?" He turned to see a sympathetic young doctor, regarding him with tired eyes. He was about to say no, but then remembered quickly that it was how they knew Scully in Concannon. She was Kate Roberts here. "Yes I am." "She told me that she was expecting a friend. We thought you'd be here hours ago." "I got....delayed." Mulder followed the doctor down a hall and thanked him as he opened the door to the bereavement suite. The doctor nodded and left. Mulder went inside, shutting the door behind him. Scully was curled up on an over-stuffed couch. He crouched down to touch her shoulder and she woke immediately. He spoke softly as she blinked against the light. "Its only me Scully." She rubbed her eyes and sat up straight. Her hair was tangled, her eyes were red and her sweater was stained with blood. "I've been waiting for you Mulder." "I had a little accident on the way." She glanced at the gash and bruise on his head and became concerned for him. "What happened?" "Someone cut the brakes on my car. Luckily I managed to steer into a wall." "They tried to kill you too?" "Tried to, but all they did was give me a nasty headache." She reached up and touched the gash. "You should get that looked at Mulder." He took her hand away and held it in his. "That's not important right now Scully. We have to think about getting you and Keiran somewhere safe." He looked around the room. "Where is he?" "In the nurses station down the hall, they're taking care of him. They wanted me to sleep." He noted the emotionless tone she was speaking with and the flat look in her eyes. "Scully, I think you're still suffering from shock." She looked down at the floor. "It was terrible Mulder, all that blood and I couldn't do anything, I tried." He pulled her towards him and held her head against his chest. "I know you did." "Keiran was screaming and....." Her body shook with emotion. He hugged her tighter. "Cry if you need to, its okay." She shook her head. "I'm alright." She pulled away from him. "Thank you for coming." "I wouldn't be anywhere else, but Scully we have to leave, quietly and quickly. They killed Peter, they tried to kill me, who's to say that they won't come back for you?" She nodded. "Okay." He reached out a hand and she took it to let him pull her up. They were about to leave the room when the Chief of Concannon Police entered. A huge, burly man, who tipped his hat at Scully and offered her a look of condolence. "I'm sorry Kate. We're still looking, but no leads yet." She stepped around Mulder to put a hand on the Chief's arm. "Martin. Peter was shot because of me, because of something that I was involved in before I came here." The Chief looked at Mulder and then back at Scully. "You mind filling me in?" Mulder interrupted "It wouldn't do any good. I don't think you'll find his killer. Though the people who did this might have another target." He inclined his head towards Scully. "You're serious?" "A man was killed this afternoon wasn't he? That's serious enough. We have to leave. I need you to show me a back door and the quietest route out of town." Scully moved closer to Mulder. "I don't have anything with me. I need clothes and Keiran's things. We'll have to go by the house." "No. We'll be too visible." The Police Chief interrupted. "This thing that you were involved in. Is it anything illegal?" Mulder shook his head and pulled out his FBI badge to show the Chief. "Okay then, how about I send one of my officers over there to collect a few things for you?" Scully looked at Mulder pleadingly and he nodded his head. "Okay, but ask them not to be too obvious when they drop the stuff back here." "We'll indulge in a little trickery on the way back. Leave it to me." Recognising someone who seemed to be on their side for once Mulder shook the man's hand. "Thank you." "No problem. You take of this woman, she's been through a lot." Mulder smiled and realised why the man had been so helpful. Yet another guy had fallen under the Scully spell. St Mary's Hospital Concannon December 16th, 1999 00.45am They sat in a corridor with Keiran sleeping in his chair between them. "Where are we going to go?" He looked over at her. "We'll drive till we think of something. I have a lot of contacts, people who'll be willing to help. Try not to worry." "Someone may be trying to kill me and you're asking me not to worry?" He leaned over and squeezed her hand. "I'm sorry this has happened. I'm sorry for Peter's death." She shook her head. "You didn't shoot him Mulder." Clearing her throat, she went on. "I was going to call you....." Before she could finish, the Chief arrived back, striding up the corridor with a stormy expression. "I don't know what the hell you two were involved in, but they certainly don't do things by halves." Mulder got to his feet. "What's happened?" "One of my officers opened the door to the house and it went up like a rocket." "A bomb?" "Yeah." The Chief looked down at his feet, obviously distressed at losing one of his colleagues. "It must have been wired to the door, tripped to go off when it was opened." Mulder looked down at Scully. "Let's go. Now." She seemed dazed as she got to her feet, as if she were in some sort of trance. Mulder collected Keiran and took her by the arm. "We have to get lost somewhere until I figure out a way to keep us alive." **************** end of chapter 12 Further chapters will hit like a controlled bolt of lightning Feedback to: caroline.o@virgin.net ************************* REMEMBER ME? (13/22) BY CAROLINE O 45 Miles from Concannon November 16th, 1999 1.20am Mulder pulled the car to a stop outside an all-night convenience store, and looked over at his passenger. She had been almost silent since they'd snuck out of the hospital. Her face was ghostly pale as she stared straight ahead of her, not even seeming to have noticed that they'd stopped driving. "Scully, I think we're safe for a while. I haven't seen anyone following us. I'm going to get some supplies." She gave a weak nod of her head to indicate she had heard him. "What are you going to need for Keiran?" She undid her seat-belt and moved to open the door. He stopped her with a hand on her knee. "Scully, you'll have to tell me what you need. I'll get it for you, you can't go in there like that." Looking down at her sweater, she seemed to notice the blood there for the first time. Her face screwed up, and for a second he thought she might break down. After a few moments though, she seemed to get control of herself and her face became impassive again. "What do you need Scully, tell me. Diapers?" She nodded. "Formula." "Okay diapers and formula." "And some baby food. He's on solids now." Her voice was weak and distant. To say he was worried about her was a gross understatement. "What about something for you? When did you last eat?" She shook her head. "I'm not hungry." "Well, you're going to eat. I'm going to go into the store and get this stuff, and then we're going to find a motel for the night. We'll both feel better when we've had some sleep." She was staring in front of her again, lost in her own thoughts. "Did you hear me Scully?" She looked around at him and nodded. "Okay. I won't be long, but if you see anything suspicious, get into the drivers seat and go like hell, okay? Don't worry about leaving me behind." She nodded again and suddenly seemed more like herself. Perhaps he just had to keep firing instructions at her to keep her alert. He checked in the back seat on Keiran who was still sleeping soundly, his tiny chest moving up and down with his breaths. Pickhurst Motel December 16th, 1999 2.32am "I'm sorry about this. Its just that I want to try and conserve the cash that I have on me. This suite was cheaper than two rooms, and it has the kitchen facilities for you to warm Keiran's food and bottles in." They stood just inside the door of the 'suite'. A grand name for a not so grand room. There was a living area, with a couch that converted into a bed, a small hot plate, and a table and chairs. In the other room were two single beds. Off the bedroom was a bathroom that looked like it might get you dirtier rather than cleaner. The whole place smelled and the carpets were riddled with holes. Scully nodded at his words and set Keiran's seat down on the table. He put his purchases next to the baby and watched her as she went into the other room and began arranging the pillows and covers on one of the beds. He wondered what she was doing at first, until it dawned on him that she was making a kind of crib for Keiran. Fixing the bed so that he wouldn't be able to roll off it in the middle of the night. "When you've done that Scully, I want you to come in here and eat something." "I just want to sleep." "You should eat first." She turned to look him directly in the eyes. "There's only one baby around here, and its not me." Feeling chastised, he nodded. "I'm going to get my things from the car." He arrived back a few minutes later with his overnight bag in his hands, thankful that he'd salvaged it from his wrecked car and brought it with him. He laid it on the couch and was digging through it to find a t-shirt when she came in from the other room. "I put Keiran down, do you want the other bed?" "No, you take it, you'll be closer to him. Besides, I'm used to sleeping rough. Its no problem." She nodded and began to leave for the other room. "Scully." She stopped and turned. He held out the shirt he had found. "Here take this. You can't sleep as you are." Looking down at her blood-soaked sweater again she nodded and took the shirt from him. She made her way into the bathroom and he took the opportunity to divest himself of his pants, jacket and shirt in privacy. He then set about setting up the couch as a bed. As he worked, he listened intensively for any noises in the bathroom that might tell him something was wrong. He was concerned by her behaviour. One minute she seemed lucid and the next it was as if she were in some sort of waking coma. He supposed it was tiredness, grief and shock, but he hoped she would snap out of it soon. He might need the strong, intelligent, sharp Scully of times past if they were going to survive and outwit those who wanted them dead. He heard the bathroom door open again and the light go off, and then the sounds of her laying down on the squeaky bed. He thought about using the bathroom himself. He was probably as smelly and grimy as this room, but not wanting to disturb her if she was about to fall asleep, he lay down and shut his eyes. It seemed like he had been asleep for only a couple of minutes when he was awakened again. In reality he'd been asleep for two and a half hours. He looked over in the direction of the noises that had awoken him. Scully was in the kitchen area, wrestling with the tasks of trying to make up a bottle of milk and pacify Keiran at the same time. He got up and moved towards her. Her eyes met his in the dim moonlight. "I was trying not to wake you." "No problem. Why don't you give the little guy to me while you do that?" He held his arms out for Keiran and she passed the baby to him. Mulder stroked the baby's back while he grizzled and fussed against his t-shirt. "So how often do you have to get up in the night?" "Depends, sometimes he'll sleep through. Others he'll be awake every couple of hours. He's unpredictable." Keiran let out a wail of protest and Mulder turned him so he could see Scully at the counter. "Hang on buddy, its coming, look, Mommy's got it cooking." He and the baby watched closely as Scully mixed the formula, screwed the cap on the bottle and placed it in the boiling water to warm. She looked up at him warily. "So, are we on the run now?" "I guess so." He was pleased that she seemed more like herself now. The brief sleep had obviously done her much good. She nodded. "Then I'm going to need more things. I only had one change of clothing for him on me, and everything else is....its all gone." Her face screwed up and she put a hand over her eyes. He pulled the hand away and tilted her head up to look at him. Her eyes were huge and wet. "Go and sit down Scully, I can handle this." To his surprise, she did as she was told, and relaxed into his makeshift bed across the room. "The bottle should be ready." Balancing Keiran on his hip, he took the bottle out of the water, squirted some of it on his wrist and licked it clean again. He turned to Scully with a smile. "I saw that in a movie once." He pulled a face. "Eugh this stuff is disgusting." Scully gave him a small smile as he walked over and took a seat next to her. He settled the baby in his lap and watched as Keiran latched greedily onto the bottle to begin feeding in earnest. "You've been to hell and back today Scully. Most people would be falling apart by now. Don't think that you should be able to cope with this without getting a little emotional." "Everything got taken away from me today Mulder, my whole life. Peter, our home..." "Not everything's gone. You still have Keiran, and for what it's worth....me, and, if I can make things safe again for you to go there, you still have a home in Washington." "You're right, besides, the things that I lost today, well, I was thinking of giving those up anyway." He looked at her in surprise. "You want to expand on that statement?" She bent her head and licked her lips. He tried not to stare, but she looked so deliciously appealing, even with her hair mussed and sleep in her eyes. She wore nothing but his t-shirt which came down to mid-thigh on her. He averted his gaze from her shapely, bare legs, to the baby in his arms, feeling like some kind of sicko. What kind of a man would be eyeing up the body of a woman who had just seen the man she lived with assassinated? Her sigh was heavy in her voice. "When I left you a couple of weeks ago to go back to Concannon, Peter met me at the airport. I was tired after the travelling and I just wanted to get home, but he insisted on taking me out to get something to eat. He said he had something to tell me. You should wind him now." He was confused for a moment before he realised that her last sentence referred to Keiran. He took the bottle away from the baby and then looked at Scully for guidance. "Just turn him onto his belly and rub his back." He did as he was told, only to have Scully let out a small laugh. "A little harder Muler, you need to get the wind up, don't worry you won't hurt him." He rubbed harder, until Keiran let out a huge belch, and then started wailing for his bottle. "Scully, if belching we're an Olympic sport you could have a future champion on your hands here." "Oh yeah, he's a real Homer Simpson in the making." He settled Keiran back into his lap again and gave him back the bottle. "You're getting good at that." "I'm a fast learner. So, what was it that Peter wanted to tell you?" She bent her head and looked down at her feet. "Let me make a guess. He told you that your first meeting wasn't pure luck after all. That he'd been told to find you, and that he's been paid to take care of you ever since." She looked up at him in surprise. "You knew?" "I haven't known from the beginning. I found out a couple of days after you left Washington. I had some friends of mine do a check on him and they found some pretty staggering deposits in his bank account. I struggled with the decision of whether or not to call and tell you." "Well, I already knew by then, but why didn't you tell me?" He shrugged. "Peter Roberts wasn't a player in all this. He was just a guy who was in trouble and took the easy way out. You weren't in any danger from him. He seemed to care for you very deeply. You wanted to go back to be with him. I felt like I'd be pooping the party for nothing." She gave a wry smile. "Well, the party had pooped itself out anyway. After he told me, I couldn't help thinking that he and I were just a big joke, a fat lie. Things were terrible between us these last two weeks. I couldn't reconcile his deceit with the kind and generous man that I thought he was." She brought her knees up to her chest and hugged them. The t-shirt rode up to show a sleek, strong thigh and he had to look away in case the effect it had on him began to show on his face. "I eventually came to the conclusion that if things in Concannon had been based on a large fallacy, that I might be better off going to the States, maybe staying with my Mother till I could work things out. I was going to call you, to discuss it, but then Peter announced he was taking a day off work, and how about we go Christmas shopping." She took a deep breath. "He seemed so enthusiastic, so keen to try and make amends, that I reconsidered. I thought he deserved a second chance. I was going to give it till the New Year to see if the relationship improved. I thought maybe I owed him that. So....we went shopping." "Scully, there's been too much death for you." "Yeah. I...I remember Emily." He looked over at her, shocked at the revelation. "Your memory is back?" "Don't get excited. All I can recall is a moment. Her face." She looked over at Keiran with a soft expression. "I think he's asleep." Mulder looked down at the baby to find that he had stopped sucking on the bottle. His tiny lips had gone slack around the teat and his breaths were deep and even. He took the bottle away and set it on the floor. Scully carefully took the baby from him and got to her feet. "That was another reason I wanted to return to Washington. As a memory jogging mission, it worked, to a degree. I have a couple of images now." He looked up at her in the darkness. "So one is of Emily, what's the other one of?" Thinking of the recollection of his face as he'd been about to kiss her, she blushed. It didn't seem an appropriate thing to be discussing in the early hours of the morning after Peter had died. "We'll talk about that another time. Goodnight Mulder." "Goodnight." She was about to leave, but hesitated in the doorway that connected the two rooms. "I'm sorry, if I snapped at you earlier...." "Perfectly understandable Scully. In the morning though, you are going to eat. Even if I have to mash it up, put in a bottle and feed it to you like I would Keiran." He heard a faint laugh and the sounds of her putting her baby and herself to bed. When he heard her breaths coming in the same deep, even pattern that matched Keiran's, he finally let his mind rest and he drifted off to sleep. ********************* end of chapter 13 Chapter fourteen is currently trapped in a boxcar. Don't worry though, there's sure to be a secret passage it can escape through. Feedback to: caroline.o@virgin.net REMEMBER ME? (14/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ***************************************** December 17th, 1999 1.42pm The car was silent except for the hum of the engine and the hypnotic, almost comforting noise of the wind against the windshield. Scully had gotten almost five hours sleep last night, but it hadn't been enough, and tiredness was still pervading her body and mind. She couldn't sleep though, the fear kept her alert and awake. She'd chosen to sit in the back seat next to Keiran. It seemed unfair to keep him restricted in a such a confined space for long hours at a time, and it was making him grouchy. When he was awake, she did her best to amuse him. Now though, he slept soundly, his ready-made mushed lunch seemed to have made him content enough for an afternoon nap. Looking at the back of Mulder's head as he drove, she wondered again at the level of faith she'd put in this man. He'd asked her to take herself out of the relatively safe custody of the Concannon Police Department, and go on the run with him to God-knows-where. She'd done it without even thinking, trusting him with her own life, and Keiran's. Yet, he had told her so many things that seemed utterly fantastic and implausible, that it seemed crazy to put such stock by him. One of her few memories of the past rose up to tell her to put her doubts aside. His face leaning in for her kiss. She could trust Mulder. After all, he'd once been her lover hadn't he? "Mulder?" He seemed to wake from deep thought, and took his eyes from the road to meet her gaze in the rear-view mirror. "Yeah." "Where are we going?" "I'm not sure yet. The next large town probably. I think there's one that should come upon us in about twenty minutes. We'll get some money there." "Do you think maybe we'll have enough to get some clothes for Keiran?" Mulder nodded. "Sure." "And...um. I could do with a sweater, but that's not essential." He looked back at her again. The interior of the car was warm thanks to the heater, but she still shivered, wearing only the t-shirt that he'd given her the night before. "Yes it is. We'll get some stuff for all of us. Its the middle of the freaking winter Scully." "Where will we go after that?" "I think there's somewhere I can take you, a safe house of sorts. It belongs to a friend of mine. I have the keys." "What then?" He was a little frustrated with her questioning and was annoyed with himself when it could be heard in his reply as he snapped at her. "I didn't expect any of this? You'll have to forgive me if I make it up as I go along." She bit her lip and looked out of the window, while he got on with the business of hating himself. ************ Cresdee Mall December 17th, 1999 2.30pm Scully watched with curiosity as he pulled a card from his wallet and slotted it the ATM. They stood outside a tiny mall, in a medium sized highway-town. "Won't they be able to find us if you use that? They could be keeping tabs on your account." He punched in the maximum withdrawal limit and looked around at her with a small smile of triumph. "Except this isn't my account. Its the account of Mr and Mrs Heffnell. They live in Wisconsin, where they opened the account. They have all their mail delivered to a P.O Box though, because their neighbour keeps riffling through their mailbox." "I don't understand." "You and I are Mr and Mrs Heffnell." "We are?" She gave him a confused look and shifted Keiran on her hip. "We set up this account a couple of years back. We used to go into a branch separately every month and pay some cash into it. It was our safety net, in case we ever found ourselves in a situation like this." She watched him collect the money in fascination. "God, did we really have to be that careful, that paranoid?" He tipped his head to think about it. "Well, you were careful, and I was paranoid. Okay, here's some cash. Get into the mall and out of the cold, and do some shopping." He pushed a wad of notes into her empty hand, turned her around and pointed her in the direction of the mall. "I'm going to make a phone call. I'll meet you back here when you're done." She nodded and started to move, then stopped and turned around. "Do you need anything?" "I don't know. I have some clothes.....maybe some underwear." He swore that she blushed a little when she spoke. "Boxers?" He gave a slight leer. "I'll let you decide. Whatever you think might suit me." After the words were out, he kicked himself mentally. It probably wasn't incredibly sensitive to flirt suggestively with a woman who was still experiencing grief. Expecting her to look disgusted, he was a little surprised when she gave a soft shake of her head and a slight smile, before turning back to towards the mall entrance. He watched her go inside before digging some change out of his pocket and heading towards the phone kiosks across the street. The man who picked up the phone did so with a cautious "Hello". Mulder smiled. "You'd better switch that tape off, this isn't a conversation that should be kept in the archives." Langly sighed, his voice giving away his relief. "Mulder, you don't know how glad I am that its you, there's been some weird shit happening around here." "Yeah like what?" Langly ignored his question to ask one of his own. "How's it going, you and Scully hanging in there? We heard about Peter Roberts biting the bullet and the bombing on the house." "How did you hear?" "It's all over the news man. They're holding you responsible." Mulder couldn't disguise his incredulity. "Me?" "Yeah. Government Agent goes mad kind of thing. They're saying you hired a killer to shoot Peter Roberts and then bombed Scully's house and kidnapped her and her baby, right under the eyes of some Police Chief. You're a wanted man. Your face is on the front pages." "Langly, I didn't do any of that." "I know that man, what do you take me for?" Mulder stood in shocked silence while he listened to a muffled discussion that Langly was having with someone else. Eventually, Byers came on the line. "Mulder, you okay? Is Scully alright?" "Yeah." "Do you need anything?" He was touched by the concern and loyalty evident in the questions. "No. We're fine for the moment. I have somewhere I can take her to hide out for a while." "Well, you're going to need to stay in the shadows, that's for sure, but there are some weird things happening." Mulder looked towards the mall for a moment, wondering if Scully's face was in the papers too, and if anybody was at this moment recognising her and calling the police. "Such as?" "A military contact told me that thousands of troops have been recalled from leave to special assignment. They've been told to say goodbye to their families, that they might not know when they're going to see them again." Mulder's blood ran colder than the air around him. Byers continued. "Our spies have it that the President has been told he may have to invoke a national state of emergency soon. Something's happening Mulder." He wondered briefly how the hell Byers knew what the President was being advised of, before he chose to ask a more pertinent question. "Where are the troops being sent?" "We don't know yet. We're watching though." "Okay, I'll call you tomorrow to see if you know the destination." There was a long pause before Byers spoke again. "We won't be here tomorrow Mulder. We're packing up, moving out. Frohike thinks our little pit here is no longer safe." Swallowing hard, Mulder thought how threatened the Gunmen must feel if they felt it necessary to leave their sanctuary. "Where are you guys going?" "Wherever the trail takes us. Maybe we'll see you along the way." "Yeah, I hope so." "Good luck Mulder. That comes from all of us." He heard some muffled speaking in the background before Byers came back on the line. "Frohike wants you to give Scully a kiss from him." "Tell him I will, and you guys be careful." "Yeah. Goodbye Mulder." "Goodbye." He put the receiver back into its cradle and stared at it for a long time, before gathering his thoughts and making another call. Diana Fowley answered her phone with brusque efficiency. He didn't waste any time on polite greetings. "Diana, let's cut through the crap. You were recruited to curtail my work and keep an eye on me. I don't blame you for accepting their offer. You were just saving your life. They vaccinated you against certain death and in return you agreed to try and temper me by becoming my fuck buddy once again." "Fox I...." He felt his temper rising, but couldn't control it. "Shut your betraying ugly mouth up and listen to me. I need to make a deal. You have to tell them that I want a deal, you understand? Hell, why am I even bothering asking you? They're listening to this, I'll ask them myself. Did you hear that, you bastards? If there's some bargain to be made to save certain lives, I want to make it. I'll call again tomorrow, same time, same number. I'll expect to speak to someone." He hung up, breathing heavily and bending over. He thought for a moment he might vomit, but he got control of his gut, and eventually over the rest of his body and mind as well, knowing that he'd have to be alert if he was going to be of any use to Scully. His suddenly weary legs carried him over to a bench outside the mall, where he sat to wait for her. He wasn't sure if he'd been sitting for two or twenty minutes before she appeared. She wore a thick green sweater that seemed to bring the redness of hair alive. She carried Keiran on one arm and some shopping bags from a baby store in the other. He got to his feet and walked towards her. "God, its freezing out here. Where's your coat Scully?" "I...I left it back at the hospital...I think I did anyway. Yesterday is kind of a blur." "Well, why the heck didn't you buy yourself a new one? The last thing I need is you getting pneumonia." "I thought we were trying to save money." He shook his head at her and pulled the car keys from his pocket. "Take these and wait for me in the car." He shoved the keys at her, and stomped into the mall. He hadn't wanted to be sharp with her, it was just that he was struggling with his fears about what might happen to them. Walking with his head down and trying not to make eye contact with the Christmas shoppers, he found a store with a women's department. He knew that he should just take the first coat he came across and get the hell out of this town, but instead he moved quickly around the racks until he found something he thought would suit her. He pulled out a size six and made his way to the cash register. It seemed to take the assistant forever to process his purchase, and he found himself furtively looking around, expecting to be recognised or found out at any moment. Maybe local law enforcement had been alerted that the FBI agent who'd turned into a murderous, kidnapper was in town. Or maybe the consortium had traced his call and we're already delivering directions to a hired gun who would shoot him down in the street. He threw the money across the desk at the alarmed assistant, grabbed the coat and broke out into a jog as he exited the store, knowing that he was drawing attention to himself, but just wanting to get away. Scully was standing by their car, having loaded Keiran and her shopping bags into it. She watched Mulder come towards her at a run and the hairs on her neck stood up in alarm. He stopped in front of her panting and holding up a navy, wool jacket. He grabbed one of her arms and started helping her into it. It was too long on the sleeves, so he rolled them up and then buttoned it right to her chin. "Mulder, is everything okay?" He shook his head. "I'm trying to make it okay." He ran a finger down her cheek and she shivered, despite the added warmth of the coat he had put on her. When he planted a kiss on her cheek where his finger had been, she couldn't help but look a little startled. He smiled. "That was from a friend of ours. I promised to pass it on." She gave him a questioning gaze, but rather than explain, he merely opened the car door "Come on. We have to go." ********************** end of part 14 ********************** REMEMBER ME? (15/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ***************************************** December 17th, 1999 3.12pm She had kept quiet, baffled by the change of moods he had undergone during her shopping trip. He'd said he was going to make a call, but who the hell had he spoken to that had got him this upset? He seemed buzzed, his body shaking, his hands gripping the steering wheel. His eyes were wide and his pupils dilated. It was if he had a fever. "Are you feeling alright" He nodded distractedly and swerved off the freeway onto a minor road. The car hurtled over bumps and ditches. "Mulder, could you slow down?" He seemed to take no notice and kept racing the car forward at breakneck speed. She raised her voice to get his attention. "Slow the hell down, or I'm driving. I won't let you risk an accident when Keiran's in the car." He shot her a look of apology and eased his foot slightly on the accelerator. "We have to get out of here." "I appreciate that, but there's nobody chasing us at this precise moment." "Okay, okay." "You mind telling me what's going on?" He shook his head. "I don't want to tell you about this and then be wrong." She folded her arms across her chest. Jesus H Christ had the man always been this vague and mysterious with her? Had he always been this unpredictable and wild? If so, how the hell had she borne it without him driving her crazy? She supposed if nothing else, life with Fox Mulder had never been dull. "We'll talk about it tonight Scully. I have to think first. I want to get it straight in my own mind." "Has there been a change of plan?" "We're going to go sideways. Not down into the States. You wouldn't believe how many people are looking for us....well, for me in particular, and then tomorrow, I'll make another call, and well, that might tell us what we should do." "So another luxurious motel tonight?" He seemed to relax a little and turned to give her a cheesy grin. "Only the best for you my princess." She knew that he was joking, but a part of her became embarrassed at the silly endearment and she turned around to busy herself with finding a toy for Keiran to play with in one of the bags. "You know there's something I've been wondering." She found a soft toy and passed it her son, who looked at it in glee and snatched it from her hands. "What's that?" "You chose to call yourself Kate. Don't you think that's strange?" Curious, she turned her attention back to Mulder. "How so?" "Well, that's your middle name, well the abbreviated version of it. You know Katherine. Kate." "Oh. You think that maybe I subconsciously chose it because that name was locked in a memory I couldn't access?" "Maybe." She looked over at him and nodded. "Maybe. Or maybe I just picked that because it was the name of one of the nurses who was nice to me in the hospital after I was found." Mulder smiled wryly. His attention was back on the road for a while, before he chose another question. "How are you feeling, you know, about Peter? You doing okay?" His voice was a soft caress that seemed to cover her heart as if his hand had settled on her chest. It seemed such a contrast to the harsh, panicked tones that he'd been using before, and she noted, not for the first time, what a complex man she was dealing with. She thought about just dismissing his enquiry, by telling him that she was coping just fine, or that she didn't need to talk about it, but instead, she opened her mouth and words came tumbling from it. "I...I would have liked to have said goodbye properly. I mean, they wheeled him into the hospital and before I knew what was happening, the doctor came to tell me he was dead. I called you and then sat down to wait for you. I....I never thought about maybe going to see him, to take my leave. I wish that I had done." She licked her lips and continued. "I feel his death. When I had no-one, he was there and I'll never forget the things he did for me, but...Mulder please don't treat me like I'm some kind of grieving widow, I don't deserve that kind of respect, because the truth of it is that...I....I didn't love him. I didn't love him like I should have done." The emotion running through Mulder at her words was so hateful that he really did think that there must be some kind of twisted evil in his veins. His heart was jumping for joy. She hadn't loved Peter and he was ecstatic. Thank God, that meant he didn't have to be jealous of a corpse. Scully continued speaking and he returned his attention to her words. "I tried to love him. When he found me, I was so cold, so scared, so alone, and he saved me. He really did. Of course, I now know that he had less than pure motives for doing that, but at the time he was like a guardian angel and I attempted to force myself into feeling something more than a liking for him. It never worked. His death has just left me feeling a little....ashamed. Ashamed that I don't feel his loss more." Mulder cleared his throat. "Well, there's no textbook on how to grieve. You just feel what you feel." She nodded and gave him a sad look. He saw the moisture in her eyes and tried to think of something to change the subject. "So, you said last night that a couple of things had come back to you? Wanna share?" She blinked a couple of times, and he was surprised to see her become so flustered. He didn't think he'd ever seen Dana Scully at such a loss, then again, he'd never heard her completely bear her soul to him like she just had before. Maybe experiences do colour and change people. Did her memory loss mean that she'd never again be the Dana Scully that he had known? She regained her composure quickly and looked once more like the woman who had stood by his side for five long years. "Well, there's not much to tell. Just a couple of images. Emily's face. That came back to me one night when I was putting Keiran to bed. Then, I remember you, slightly. Its just a moment." He looked rather pleased and flattered that she recalled him and smiled broadly at her. "Yeah, tell me about it." She stumbled over the words, feeling ridiculously embarrassed about being embarrassed, why didn't she just tell him, bring the issue out in the open and get him to relate the history of their relationship for her. "Well, its nothing really....." She trailed off and looked out the window, still seeing his lips in her mind. "No, come on, describe it to me. I might be able to pinpoint the time and place, relate the circumstances and it could help to jog something else for you." Scully considered carefully before she spoke. "Well, when you get round to telling me who you spoke to and what was said while I was in the mall, I'll tell you about what I remember?" He smiled and nodded. "Okay, Scully. Whatever." A soft toy flew over the front seat and struck Mulder on the back of the head. He let out a yelp and turned round to look at the baby who giggled and chuckled. Mulder rubbed the back of his neck and looked over at Scully who was suppressing a laugh. "Nice pitch Keiran. Good accuracy. You won't be last pick on the softball field." Keiran then kicked and screamed for his toy to be given back to him. Scully fished around for it and put it back into his chubby hands. He smiled at her in appreciation. Through the rear view mirror, Mulder watched the exchange with a lump in his throat. Crestview Motel 9.19pm Mulder looked over Scully's shoulder as she checked on Keiran. It had taken her over an hour to get the tiny boy off to sleep. Every time she had thought she'd succeeded, he'd open his eyes wide and kick his arms and legs about, wanting to be picked up again, wanting to play and look at his surroundings. "Is he....?" She turned around to Mulder and put a finger to her lips. Mulder lowered his voice to a whisper. "Sorry." He looked down at the baby again. The small, angelic face he wore in repose seemed so different to the one he had donned earlier when he'd been spitting his dinner into his bib. Now he was a pure picture of calm and tranquillity. Scully left Mulder looking at the baby and moved to sink into a chair across the room. "For a scary moment there I thought it was going to be a very long sleepless night for all of us." Managing to tear his gaze away from Keiran, Mulder moved to sit on the edge of the other bed in the room, opposite Scully. He indicated the two beds with his thumb. "You okay with this? They didn't have any suites, and I just feel safer if we're all together." Her eyes drifted shut as she nodded. "Its fine. Don't worry about it." He watched her delicate profile thoughtfully, remembering how he had helped her give the baby his bath and how he had laughed when Keiran had ended up with more dinner on his face that in his stomach. She'd asked Mulder to look after him while she took her own bath and he'd done so happily, delighting in being trusted with her precious bundle; thrilled by the responsibility. He smirked to himself. How warped did a man's life have to be when a evening of domesticity took on such wonder and excitement, and conspiracies, monsters and UFO's seemed so mundane in comparison? "We really have to talk." Scully's voice snapped him out of his reverie. She crossed the room to sit on the bed beside him. "Mulder. You kept me in the dark when you suspected there might be something wrong with Keiran, and you know how upset I was about that. Don't leave me guessing again." He sighed heavily. ""Give me till tomorrow. I'll only be assuming things before then. I'm speaking to someone and then I'll tell you what I think may be happening, and which way we're going to have to jump." She thought for a moment before nodding. "Okay." As she scooted up the bed to lay against the headboard, he caught her light airy, clean scent. He wondered what she'd say if he asked to press his face against her graceful neck and inhale her smell for a few moments. "Instead. You can tell me something else." He lay back on his elbows and craned his neck to look at her. "Tell you what?" She shrugged. "Anything. Something about me, us, anything." She closed her eyes and breathed deeply. He took the opportunity to gaze at her small, curvy figure, clad in a pair of boxers and a t-shirt, both his. He just stared for a long moment, loving the sight of her sprawled out on his bed, and wondering if he were imagining the whole scene. She opened one eye and looked at him sternly. "Well, come on. I want a story." "I'm trying to think of something." "Tell me about the time we first met." She settled down more comfortably on the bed, shutting her eyes once more. He smiled. "The first time I saw you? Or the first time we met?" "Different story?" "Oh yeah." He settled down comfortably himself. They were a few feet apart, but he was still mesmerised by the fact that he was in bed with Dana Scully. Well, almost. "The first time I saw you was at Quantico. I was called there to..to defend some of my methods to the men who had written the rule books. I stated my case and they said I should wait while they discussed my deviant investigation methods and whether my actions on certain cases needed to be curtailed by some kind of punitive measures. They were arseholes. Anyway, I took a walk around, dropped into some lectures and ended up in a self-defence class. I just stood by the door watching. It was one of those role-playing exercises where students pretend to attack one another." "When do I come into this story?" "I'm building the picture. You wanna hear this or not?" She nodded. "So, anyway, you were there. The instructor was obviously some kind of twisted macho, sicko who wanted the little girlie to get as much shit as possible so she'd quit, because he'd partnered you in the exercise with this guy who was the size a tank. I mean, he was huge." "And ugly?" "Very ugly. Mean-looking. You'd try to attack him and he wasn't just defending himself, he was taking you down and out every time. You must have had enough bruises that night to play dot-to-dot on your body, but you didn't give up." "Good." "The roles got reversed and when he ran at you to do the attacking you gave him something to think about." She opened her eyes and peered at Mulder. "What?" "Kneed him right in the nuts. Perfect strike. He hit that mat with a scream, and you were just standing there with this innocent look on your face. I don't think that particular manoeuvre was one that you were supposed to be practising that day." She raised herself up on her elbow. "You never told me that story before did you?" He shook his head. "We met about a year after that. You'd qualified and, after a stint as a Quantico instructor, you were assigned to the X Files. I kept meaning to tell you that I'd seen you before, but I don't know. I wanted to keep you at arms length, because I didn't know if I could trust you. I didn't want to tell you that you'd already earned my respect that day in the defence class." "I earned your respect huh?" "Well, I knew I didn't ever want to get on your bad side." "So you saw me that day and walked away. You never introduced yourself?" He shrugged. "I didn't have such a great reputation then. A 'hello' from Spooky Mulder could have ruined a promising student's reputation." "You should have said hello." "Well, there were other reasons why I didn't." "Such as?" Their gazes met and he noticed that her eyes had deepened to a dark navy colour. "Well..I was worried that it might seem like I was coming on to you and, well...I was married at that time." She sat up in surprise, looking at him with her jaw hanging low and her mouth forming a perfect 'O'. "You never told me that before either, did you?" ***************** end of part 15 Part 16 is currently Walking in Memphis. Should be here anytime soon. ****** REMEMBER ME? (16/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 (this is the part where it kicks in - don't say you weren't warned) Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ***************************************** Diana Fowley's apartment Washington December 17th, 1999 9.32pm She had waited for over three hours now, because she knew someone would come and advise her what to do. They'd appear on her doorstep as if by magic, as they had done at her Paris apartment nearly two years ago when they'd recruited her into their cause. It hadn't taken a lot to persuade her to join the ranks. It was a simple choice, co-operate or die. The knock came and Diana Fowley got up to answer it. As she opened the door she was hit by a strong gust of cigarette smoke. Neither of them bothered with greetings as he entered her apartment and closed the door behind him. "You heard the conversation?" The man nodded. "Of course. We hear everything." "And? What's going to happen tomorrow?" "So he says he wants a deal. You know I offered him a deal once and he spat it back in my face. " "Then what should I say to him when he calls again?" "Tell him that you've been asked to meet him to discuss the bargain for his life." Diana nodded. "Okay." The man took another deep inhale of his cigarette. "Then kill him." The words were spoken without emotion and Diana blinked in disbelief. "What....what would that accomplish? I mean, he'll die anyway won't he, when it happens?" "Maybe, maybe not. I'd sooner not take a chance on him remaining alive. Kill him Agent Fowley. If you want to save your own life, it's your only option." "What about Scully, and the child?" The man shrugged and walked back towards the door. "I suppose they're interesting, from a medical point of view, but if you happened to accidentally kill them too, its not a problem." "This isn't fair. I'm not a hired assassin. You told me all I'd have to do is keep an eye on Mulder." "I told you to sleep with Mulder and drive he and Agent Scully apart, yet you failed to do that and we had to take drastic action to stop them getting closer to the truth. You failed Diana, and this is a consequence of your failing." He went to leave and she grabbed his arm in a desperate attempt to change his mind. "No, I'll set it up, I'll lead you to him, but I won't pull the trigger." He smirked down at her. "Do you know how lucky you are? You were given the option of living. Do you want to reconsider your choice?" She thought for a moment and then shook her head. "No." "Then get rid of Fox Mulder for me." Understanding dawned on her. "Oh I see. This was your assignment. You've been told to pull the trigger on him, but you're passing your dirty work onto me." Surprised by her astuteness, he nodded. "Yes Ms Fowley, but why should I grind the organ when I have a monkey to do it for me?" He left her standing in her living room, wondering why she was so keen to go on living when all the future promised was a life dealing with the misery these men and their conspirators would create. She sank into her couch, dreading the onset of morning and what the day would bring. Crestview Motel December 17th, 1999 10.10pm She laid back flat on the bed again. Mulder had always admired her patience. The ability she had to be still and wait for people to speak to her. He turned away, sitting up and wringing his hands together, while turning things over in his mind. He started to speak, hesitantly at first, before he gained a momentum. "I met her when I was just a couple of months out of the Academy. She was practically the only one of my colleagues who didn't ridicule my ideas and beliefs. It was the first serious relationship I'd had since...well, since another relationship... one that had nearly destroyed me. So, of course, I imagined myself in love. I thought we could be a team, because we had the same interests and curiosities. I asked her to marry me, and she did." "What happened?" Scully's voice was soft, lulling. He had heard her use that same tone on cases when questioning small children. Sighing heavily, he ran a hand through his hair. "When she realised that being with me and conducting our work meant she'd be forever ridiculed and that her career would be ruined, she started to grow distant. She went ahead with the marriage, but when she was offered a job with an elite group and the chance to work in Europe, she took it." "You couldn't work out some long-distance arrangement?" Mulder shook his head. "No, it wasn't just her career that forced us apart, we were also pretty incompatible on a day-to-day basis." "So you didn't enjoy being married then?" He looked around at her and smiled. "Worst three weeks of my life." She laughed and he revelled in the sound. It was a rare noise from her. Yet, soon afterwards, her face became serious and she sat up beside him. "So why didn't you ever tell me about it?" "How do you know that I haven't?" "Because of the way you said it. You blurted it out like it was some sort of confession." "I don't know Scully. It was...when she turned up, it was in the middle of a case, and there never seemed to be a right time to say it. Then, afterwards, I was worried what you'd think, if you'd assume that I'd been keeping it from you." "Hang on. She turned up?" "Yes. Its Diana Fowley. She came back to work on the X Files, shortly before you disappeared." "That woman who was with you, when you came to see me the first time?" He nodded and looked down at the floor. "Oh." "What does 'oh' mean?" "Nothing, it's just... interesting that's all. Mulder, can I ask you something? Its confusing for me. I'd like to know what sort of relationship we had?" He looked nonplussed for a moment before she elaborated for him. "We're we close?" Nodding enthusiastically, he reached across and touched her arm. "Yes, very close." "But you never told me before that you used to be married?" Shaking his head, he searched for the right words, even though he knew that their's had been a friendship with so many complexities that it was almost impossible for him to describe it for her. "We had complete faith and trust in one another, but we didn't have to know everything about one another for us to be that way. Sometimes, events would happen in our lives that we didn't share with one another, yet, we knew that if we needed the other person, they'd be there." Dejected by his words, she rested her elbows on her knees and studied the floor. "I'm sorry Scully, I'm probably not explaining it very well." She got up and paced to the other end of the room, as if to put some distance between them, and Mulder immediately missed the close proximity of her body. "You probably are." She thought back to the way she'd been with Peter. Telling him only what she'd wanted him to know, hiding her feelings until they came crashing down around her and she'd had to tell someone or go crazy. "At least, you're explaining me well." Wishing that he had never mentioned Diana, and had chosen a completely different story instead, Mulder rubbed his palms down the front of his jeans and got up. "I'm going to take a shower. I don't want anyone feinting under the stench of my odours." She gave a half-smile as he passed her on his way to the bathroom. Crestview Motel December 17th, 1999 11.13pm Mulder towel-dried his hair and slipped into a t-shirt and boxer shorts, feeling cleaner after the shower. He stroked his chin, his hand moving over the roughness of two days worth of stubble. He was trying not to think about what tomorrow might bring, preferring to enjoy the simple fact that he was here with Scully. After eighteen months without her, her nearness was something to celebrate. Yet, no matter how hard he tried, his fears for the future rose to the surface of his thoughts and drowned out all others. What would become of them when the project unleashed terror upon the world? Would they perish, or would they survive, only to be hunted for the rest of their days? They're trying to kill us. The thought struck him as if it were new, except it had been his main concern for days, although now he understood the meaning embedded inside it. They were being pursued, attempts were being made on their lives, but why? Why bother assassinating them when they had the weapon to wipe out every human on the planet? He knew the answer immediately, and cursed himself for not thinking with more clarity before. "We're immune." He had injected Scully with a vaccine in the Arctic, he himself had been given a mysterious disease in a Russian gulag and then been immediately cured of it by an injection. They had both been made immune. It was a sliver of hope that made him smile into the mirror, until he remembered the small baby that lay in peaceful slumber next door to him, and a shiver went down his spine. Keiran had been created with the expertise of the consortium, that he was sure of, but who knew whether they had afforded him the luxury of immunity to their disease. He switched off the light as he made his way into the bedroom, resolving to get some sleep in preparation of what may lay before him. In the soft glow of moonlight, he came to a stop in front of his bed and looked down at it with an amused expression. The sleeping arrangements had not gone to plan. Instead of snuggling down with her son, Scully was occupying one side of his mattress. On top of the covers, one hand resting on her stomach and her hair splayed out on the pillow, she slept soundly. She had probably just meant to lay down for a few moments, but had nodded off comfortably. Mulder considered his options. He could wake her and ask her to move to the other bed. He could try lifting her and putting her next to Keiran. Or he could just get in the other side and bask in her smell and warmth all night long. Making up his mind, he lifted her legs gently and pulled the covers down. Setting the shapely, smooth limbs down again, he pulled the covers up and over her, tucking them under her chin. She made a 'humph' sound and snuggled down into the pillow. Mulder slipped into bed beside her. Well, if the World was going to come to an end, didn't he at least deserve this? One night by her side. He lay looking up at the ceiling, hoping she would roll over and cuddle up to him. He didn't care if she did it thinking he were someone else. He just wanted to be held. She didn't however. She seemed to have entered that deep sleep, where not even dreams come and the body rests as still as if it were an empty shell, unmoved by the soul that occupies it. He took a chance and leaned in close to her ear, speaking softly in the dark room. "I love you Scully." He jumped when she replied; when he heard the sound of her voice, and then had to bite back a laugh when the word registered. "Cheeseburger." She said it loud and clear, and then turned over, shuffling her body against his and slinging an arm across his chest. He froze, and when he was quite sure that she was asleep and had been asleep the whole time, he relaxed and shut his eyes. X Files Office FBI Headquarters Washington DC December 18th, 1999 5.50am Unable to sleep, Diana had been drawn to the office and now sat in Mulder's chair. She had sorted through his drawers and found a picture of him and Scully at a crime scene. It was charred around the edges and she supposed that it had been a surviving item from the fire that had once nearly gutted the basement of the Hoover building. Diana had no pictures of her and Mulder. She had left him for Europe with nothing but a few business suits and expensive shoes. It was the way she was. Forever moving on and leaving the past behind. It was what she'd been taught to do since she was a child. Her mother had dragged her from town to town. They'd settle somewhere, and Diana would join a school and make friends, only for her mother to attract trouble in the form of an unsuitable man, and they'd have to up sticks and move again. Never mentioning the past, leaving it unspoken and forgotten. Diana looked at the photograph of Fox Mulder. She had seen the chance to break the pattern; to return to confront her history and past mistakes. Now, however, she knew that her mother had been right to keep going down the one-way street. You could go back, but it was never the same. The man who had once held you, would most likely be holding someone else. The work that had once challenged you would leave you feeling little more than confused and irritated, and the Government you had once innocently trusted in would seem full of liars and conspirators. She took her gun from its holster and laid it on the desk in front of her, briefly considering raising it to her temple and ending the misery. Changing her mind, she decided instead to continue her broken journey down the one-way street. She'd leave her past and become someone else; a player in the future. The woman who had shot Fox Mulder. All she had to do now was sit and wait for the phone to ring. Crestview Motel December 18th, 1999 Scully awoke in a forest. The bright lights above her almost blinding her. Beside her was a woman with long, dark hair and hazel eyes. Scully watched helplessly as the woman floated up from the ground and was carried away by the light. She cried out, but found she couldn't move. A tall, broad, blond man was suddenly above her, pinning her to the ground with his hands around her throat. She watched in amazement as the man's face changed. It liquefied and re-arranged itself into Mulder's features. She looked down at herself to find she was naked. Laying on a sleeping bag, surrounded by the forest. The fully-clothed Mulder smiled at her before separating her legs and kneeling between them, lowering his face into the coppery curls that rested in the junction of her thighs. She squirmed and moved beneath his mouth. Saturated with need and wanting release so badly that she felt she would die without it. He sucked, licked and probed her with a delicate, skilful mouth and she grabbed at his hair with her hands, clamping his face to her.. It felt so good, so wonderfully right. Then she saw the people approaching, dozens of them, coming out from the trees, did she know them? She wasn't sure. We're they from her past? All she knew was that Mulder had to make her come before they arrived. Her hands left his hair and moved to her breasts. She stroked and caressed herself while his tongue moved inside her. Her pleasure grew as much from the intimacy of the act as from the physical feel of it. She heard herself panting, groaning. The muscles in her thighs clenched. Still the people approached, growing near, till she could see that she didn't know them after all. They were faceless. No features, no expressions. Her fear was overrode by the sweet pain of approaching orgasm and her hips continued to grind into Mulder's face as she tugged her own nipples. It was all destroyed by a sudden shot. A shout of pain from Mulder, who rose up to look at her, and smiled sadly with her juices still on his lips. She looked down to see the white shirt he was wearing stained with blood. A bullet had passed through his heart. It killed him. He slumped forward onto her chest, a lifeless cover for her naked form, as the faceless men drew nearer. She screamed. Both in the dream and out loud in the dark motel room. It was the sound of her own panic that woke her from the nightmare and she sat bolt upright in the bed, staring at the blank wall in front of her and trying to get her breathing under control. Beside her Mulder also sat up and laid a tentative hand on her back. "You okay Scully?" She nodded. "I just had a dream, that's all." She said it as much to reassure herself as him. She got out of the bed and leant over to check on Keiran. Seeing him resting peacefully, she looked around at Mulder and wondered what to do next. She had awoken next to him. They'd been sleeping together. She vaguely remembered falling asleep on his bed, and supposed that he had just crawled in the other side. Now, she wondered if she should apologise and lay down next to Keiran. Before she could decide, Mulder patted the mattress beside him. "Come here. Tell me about the dream." The very thought of describing it to him brought a flush to her face, but she sat next to him anyway, still trying to shake off the slumber-induced images. "I have them now and then. They're not cohesive, just a jumble of images. There's no sense in them." "They seemed to be very vivid. You were moving around, making a lot of noise." Remembering the way she had groaned and panted, and moved in the dream, she was suddenly distraught with embarrassment. Had her body played all that out in the motel room, waking Mulder, for him to watch her? Had she touched her breasts, thrust her hips? Good God, she hoped not. "Lie down Scully." She found herself doing as she was told. Trusting the soft, hypnotic quality of his voice. "Are they memories?" She sighed. "I don't know. If they are I've had a pretty strange life." Mulder chuckled and lay down beside her. His arm reached out to her of its own accord, and to his pleasant surprise she responded to it, moving against him once more. He held her tightly. "Is this okay?" She smiled into the side of his chest. What a wonderfully considerate, sensitive man. "Yes, its fine." "I don't want you to think I'm trying anything here." "I don't think that." "Good." Scully shut her eyes and tried not to squirm against the boxers that she wore. They were damp with arousal. Evidence of her dream. Mulder tried to sleep, although it wasn't easy with an erection that stood proudly to attention. It twitched towards the ceiling and it took all his mental efforts to resist the primal urge to clasp his hand around it and tug, squeeze and stroke until his body spasmed and it became a lump of soft, emptied flesh again. He sighed heavily. God it was going to be a long night. End of part 16 ************************************ Part 17 took a Detour and fell down a hole. Its currently awaiting a ladder Feedback more welcome than the flowers in May at: caroline.o@virgin.net ********************** REMEMBER ME? (17/22) BY CAROLINE O Yong's Diner Moose Jaw Saskatchewan November 18, 1999 2.45pm Scully waited for him, gripping a cup of cold coffee that had barely been touched. Beside her, in a high-chair that the waitress had happily provided, Keiran was chewing with his toothless gums on the soft toy that she had given him yesterday. Mulder was at a payphone near the exit, she couldn't hear his words but saw the wary and stoic expressions that crossed his face as he spoke and listened alternately. He looked almost a completely different man from the one he'd been this morning. She remembered how they'd woken up to Keiran's cries, in a tangle of arms, legs and sheets. Mulder, obviously not used to being woken by a baby, had jumped out of bed as if he were being attacked in the night. His hair had stood on end and his boxers and t-shirt were crumpled, as he'd blinked into the morning sunlight, trying to establish the sound. Scully had watched him through one opened eye, trying not to think about how much she wanted him to lie back down with her, mentally groaning at the thought of having to get up and tend to her cranky son. Mulder must have noticed her reluctance to move from the warm confines of the bed, because he offered to get Keiran up and carefully lifted the baby into his arms, laying him against his chest and stroking his back in an effort to calm him. The sight of her tiny boy being cradled gently by the huge man, had made her heart constrict, and she'd got up herself to fix the bottle, rather than lay there watching them, torturing herself with impossible fantasies. All through those morning hours, she'd struggled against the attachment she felt for Mulder. She kept telling herself it wasn't right for her to be falling for him, to be attracted to him, so soon after Peter's death. Even if the feelings she was experiencing for Mulder had begun even before the terrible tragedy. Yet as Mulder had helped her with Keiran, marvelling over his tiny socks and insisting that the baby's feet couldn't possibly be that small, she felt him sinking deeper inside her soul, opening a place for himself and burrowing into it. The attraction wasn't all cerebral though. A great proportion of it was physical. Her dream was testament to that. She still flushed at the thought of her night imaginings. She felt herself being dragged along, caught up in his enthusiasm and paranoia, and knew that, deep down, a part of herself was protesting at being led around in this way, but she also felt loathe to resist what made her feel alive and important for the first time in over a year. Keiran dropped the toy and she picked it up for him, kissing his forehead. Mulder had told her to be ready to run as soon as he'd finished the call, and now, as he put the receiver down she got to her feet, collecting their coats and the diaper bag. Mulder strode across the diner and collected Keiran in his arms. They rushed out to the car, calling their thanks to the waitress on the way. Scully noticed how Mulder tried to hide his face from the woman, shielding himself with the baby. Five minutes later they were on the road again. Scully chose to sit next to Mulder up front. His eyes were on the road ahead, focused and determined, his expression grim and dark. She licked her lips. "So?" He glanced at her quickly, before returning his eyes to the road. "We're going to that place I told you about. The safe house. We'll have to change this car though, they'll be looking for it, and as soon as we're on a major road...." "Mulder, for Christ sakes what's going on? You can't leave me in the dark for any longer, I need to know why I'm out here on the run." Despite the deep frost of winter that pervaded all around them, in the interior of the car, Mulder wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead. "The men I told you about, the ones who I believe who are involved in a plot to...." He didn't want to finish the sentence, knowing how ridiculous the words would sound. She finished it for him in a sceptical, slightly derisive tone that he knew well. "...to kill the population, and populate the world with their own creations?" "I know how idiotic and paranoid it sounds." "Oh, hang on, I forgot the part about them being in cahoots with the aliens." "It's not funny Scully. It's very real and its going to happen." "When?" "Soon." "How soon is soon?" His voice rose in temper. "I don't know that." She looked shocked that he had dared to yell at her and he apologised with a grunt. "I'm sorry. I know I must sound like a lunatic to you." She shook her head. "I don't think you're crazy, but I do think you may be buying into some of the Millenium madness that's going around." He looked at her with a strangely intense expression. "The Millenium?" "It's quite a phenomenon, I've done some reading on it. Mass paranoia as the end of the twentieth century approaches. Every day more and more people are subscribing to the belief that it may mark some kind of Doomsday." "The Millenium." This time she did look at him like she believed he might be slightly crazy. "What?" He shot her a steady look. "That's how soon 'soon' is." She opened her mouth to say something but decided against it, and as they drove on through the crisp white landscape, a silence descended over the occupants of the car, as they each delved into their own thoughts and fears. ****************** THREE DAYS LATER North of St Donat Quebec December 21st, 1999 2.15pm Mulder looked across at her with a small smile on his face as she glanced up at the cabin. He was somewhat pleased with himself. This place was like a palace compared to the motel rooms they had rented over the last six days. "It looks like something out of a fairytale." Keiran let out a happy wail, as if he agreed with her, and as Mulder pulled their belongings from the jeep he had rented using their Mr and Mrs Heffnell account, he knew this had been the right place to bring them. The cabin was a one-story building made from logs, and sat on top of a snow covered hill, surrounded by tall pine trees. "Come on Scully. Don't just stand there staring, let's get inside, it's freezing out here." She nodded and moved forward onto the porch, resting Keiran on her hip as she watched Mulder struggle with the keys and their bags. He finally managed to get the door open and they stepped inside. Stomping the snow from their boots. Mulder noted that it seemed almost as cold inside as it was outside. He quickly went about finding some fuel for the fire while Scully went from room to room to explore. There were two small bedrooms, each just big enough to house the double beds inside them. It was an old cabin, but had been modernised well, with built-in closets, and a basic, but new bathroom and a kitchen which boasted all the latest appliances. When she went back to the living room, she almost laughed out loud at the cosiness of it. The log fire, which Mulder had gotten started, the plump, comfortable couch with a plaid comforter, the huge leather chair by the window. "Mulder, who owns this place, its amazing?" He turned from the fire and offered her a grin. "You like it?" "I love it. You said it belonged to a friend of yours?" "Well, when I said a friend...actually it's mine. My parents used to have a summer house, and when the both passed away, I decided to sell it and buy this place instead, under an assumed name of course." "Of course." "I thought it would make a good hideaway. Should we ever need it." "You really like to prepare for the worst don't you?" She sank into the couch and sat Keiran beside her, reluctant to take his snowsuit off yet, it was still cold in the cabin, the fire having yet to throw off little more than a lukewarm breeze. Mulder looked at her apologetically. "It's been empty for a long time, might take a while to get rid of the chill." She shrugged. "I don't suppose there's anything to make a hot lunch out of? That would keep us warm for a while." "There might be tinned soup." She jumped up, eager to be of use. It seemed as if he had done everything for them in the last few days, and she didn't want him thinking that she was some kind of helpless dependent. "Will you watch Keiran while I fix it?" He gave her a huge grin. "Sure. No problem." He moved towards the baby, ready to try his best to keep him happy and amused. As she moved towards the kitchen, Scully watched the eagerness with which he took the task. There was little doubt that Mulder was getting more and more attached to her son, and she wondered whether she should be quite so happy about it as she was. North of St Donat Quebec December 21st, 1999 2.15pm "When did your parents pass away?" The question pulled him out of his thoughts and he looked over at her in surprise. "Why?" She gave a small chuckle. "I'm just interested in you that's all. I mean we we're close, like you said, but I feel like I don't know you." He sighed, and looked back at the roaring fire that had held his attention so steadily before. The day had passed with a speed associated with settling into a new place. They had eaten their soup, unpacked their meagre belongings, and assessed their supplies, coming to the conclusion that tomorrow would have to involve a trip to the store if they were going to stay here much longer. Now they sat sipping cocoa made from a packet, on opposite ends of the couch in the much warmer cabin, as Keiran slept the sleep of the innocent, in one of the bedrooms. "My father passed a few years ago. My mother died last summer." Her face was the picture of compassion. "Not so long ago. I'm sorry I didn't mean to......." He stopped her with a smile. "She was very ill. I expected it. You were there at the time and you were a big comfort to me. You attended the funeral." She was thoughtful for a moment, her face becoming a mask of concentration. She looked beautiful in the firelight, wearing one of his shirts and her jeans. He wanted to move a little closer, but found himself paralysed by her form and features, and the warmth he felt emanating from her soul. "What are you thinking about Scully?" "I was just wondering if it'll ever come back. My memory. I want to remember things like that." "Call me selfish Scully, but in a way I kind of like the fact that you don't remember me. Gives me a chance to make a new start." She gave him a soft look. "I'm sure you weren't that bad." "There's a lot of things I feel ashamed about." She shook her head. "Don't think like that. We all have regrets." He sank further into the deep couch, crossing his long legs at the ankles. Falling into thought in the comfortable silence that ensued. Over the past few days they had discussed the consortiums possible plans over and over again. Talking about their chances of survival, and what might become of a world domineered by an alien race. He didn't know how much Scully believed what he had told her, but she took the threat seriously enough and debated with him, until they had both found that there was nothing left to say; that all that could be done was to wait for Mulder's meeting with Diana Fowley. He frowned, thinking about how his one-time lover had crossed to the other side. He got up and walked around the couch and into one of the bedrooms. He leant over the bed, to see Keiran sleeping soundly within his makeshift crib of pillows and blankets. When he went back out to the living room and sat back down he noticed Scully looking at him speculatively. He shrugged. "Just seeing how he was." "And?" "He's fine." She nodded. "Does it still bother you, not knowing who his Father is?" He hated the way he had blurted it out, but waited nonetheless for her answer, while his heart beat so loudly in his chest that he was surprised she couldn't hear it. "Well, from what you've told me it hardly matters does it? He was created in a laboratory. DNA typing tells me that I'm definitely his mother. Maybe that's all that I'll ever know." "Yet, somebody's sperm was used to create him." "Perhaps, but its not likely that I'll ever find out whose." Mulder struggled with himself, his stomach churning and his throat dry. "I know whose." Her gaze, which had been directed at the fire, swung towards his eyes. She understood instantly. "Yours?" He stood up, feeling guilty for not telling her before. "Scully......" She didn't let him finish. "How do you know?" "Doctor Penn. I had him run some blood tests; mine against the sample he took from Keiran." "What made you even suspect?" "Why would they create a healthy, normal child? It made no sense. The only reason I could see why they would do that is to use him as a threat against me. If I ever got too close they'd reveal him to me, and then promise to take him away again if I didn't back off." A few moments of silence descended over the room. Scully's eyes were large and wet. "What is the matter with you? Why do you keep things from me, and then reveal them when I least expect it? Do you get some sort of kick out of it?" He shook his head. "No, no. I just....I didn't know how to tell you. I was afraid the whole idea might repulse you." She looked back at the fire again. "Don't be ridiculous, why would it?" Her face softened. "Mulder...is there any chance that I was pregnant before I was taken, that he was conceived normally?" He was confused by the question at first, until it dawned on him that she was asking if they'd made love before she'd been taken. The very idea of it made his body shake. "You were barren before you were taken." She nodded and got to her feet. "I'm going to bed." "We should talk about this?" "Talk about what? What do you expect me to say? That I'm delighted Keiran has a father who is deceitful, paranoid, and believes in little green men and goblins?" Her words stung. "You don't mean that Scully." She ran a hand through her hair. "Scully. Don't call me that anymore. 'Scully' must have been some kind of idiot to have gotten wrapped up with you for six fucking years. How many lies did you tell in that time? How many times did you deceive her?" He looked down at the floor, unable to face her whilst her accusations lay heavy on his heart. He didn't watch her go, but knew she had fled to the bedroom when he heard the door slam shut. The noise woke Keiran and Mulder listened to his cries, and the soothing noises Scully made to calm him. Sinking to the couch, he knew he would get little sleep tonight. The last three nights he had slept in Scully's embrace. They had found excuses to share the same bed and curled up around each other. He was quite sure that they'd never lie that way together again. ****************************** end of part 17 REMEMBER ME? (18/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ******************************************* North of St Donat Quebec December 22nd, 1999 1.14am Scully lay as close to Keiran as possible, listening to his deep, light breaths and studying the flawless skin and pouty lips she knew so well. She stroked his downy hair as an unexpected tear fell from her eye. She wiped it away, nearly as angry with herself as she was with Mulder. Should his revelation have been more welcome? Wasn't Keiran's parenthood a question that had troubled her? At least now she knew. Yet how dare Mulder keep it from her for so long? Had he even toyed with the idea of never telling her? She realised that part of the reason for her anger was a loss of control. She had always believed that regaining her memory would give her back a strength which she'd had to surrender when she'd laid penniless, friendless and memory-less in the Concannon Hospital. Then there'd been nothing that had belonged to her. No possessions, no identity. Of course her body and the tiny life growing inside it had been hers, but that was something which she'd only come to appreciate when Keiran had been born. Now, she was told that her body had been experimented on without her permission, and that her beloved son belonged not only to her, but to someone else as well. She had happily let Mulder take care of Keiran over the last week. She had entrusted to him watch over the baby; help dress, feed and bathe him. Now she wanted to hug the tiny boy to her chest and scream 'mine' at Mulder if he ever dared come near him. North of St Donat Quebec December 22nd, 1999 5.42am She awoke to noises in the living room. Someone was moving around, trying to be quiet. Scully listened for a while until she recognised Mulder's step and breathed out a sigh of relief. Pulling a sweater on over her t-shirt and boxers, she left the dozing Keiran and went out to the other room, thinking how amazing it was that in the middle of all this insanity the baby had finally settled into a regular sleeping pattern. He had gone through four nights in a row without waking her. Mulder was on the couch lacing up his boots, he looked up at her warily, not knowing what to say, before deciding not to speak. She broke the short silence. "Where are you going?" The question demanded an answer. "I have to meet Diana Fowley." "You have to go now? Its not even light yet?" He stood and pulled on his coat. "I want to get there early, be prepared." Scully swayed from one foot to another, the wood floor cold on her bare feet. "Don't go." The words had fallen out of her mouth and surprised her as much as they did him. "I mean....I have a bad feeling about it. What if they're just luring you out to kill you?" "I've thought of that. I know the risks, but the risks of just sitting around and doing nothing may be far greater." There were two handguns on the table. He picked one up and slotted it into the holster on the waistband of his jeans. He nodded at the remaining metal weapon. "That's for you. If anyone comes here while I'm gone, shoot first. They'll be plenty of time for questions later." He paused and met her gaze for the first time that morning. "You think you know how to use it?" She crossed the room and took it into her grasp, feeling the weight of it. With a professional ease, she unloaded the full clip to inspect it and then shoved it back in. She clicked the safety off and then on again, and briefly looked down the sight to take aim at an imaginary intruder. "Seems to be something I recall." He wanted to smile, but still felt inhibited by their argument of the night before. He nodded instead. "Good. I'll get some supplies on the way back. Anything you need?" "The usual baby paraphernalia." Nodding, he headed towards the door, wishing he had the guts to ask to hold Keiran in his arms before he left. "I plan on coming back tonight, but if...if something happens, if I'm not here by then, I left a number for you to call in the kitchen. It's for Walter Skinner. He can be trusted." She nodded, watching him go with a feeling of unease. "Mulder....." He stood in the now open doorway, looking back at her. "Be careful." "You too." He was gone the next moment, leaving her staring at the doorway. She was attacked then by another memory. It came first as a feeling, a sense of being left while he went on without her. The image followed of him on a boat, sailing steadily out onto a dark sea, while she called after him. He was pretending not to hear her. She let her knees buckle and she fell onto the soft couch, trying desperately to recall more detail, but it was all she could remember, and after a few moments she was snapped back into the present time by the sound of Keiran's cries for attention. Montreal Quebec December 22nd, 1999 11.52am Leaning against the wall of the bus station, Mulder scouted the crowds again and again. He couldn't see anything suspicious, but then he was dealing with highly trained masters in the art of 'blending in'. He closed his eyes, allowing himself a moments rest. He had ten minutes before Fowley was due to arrive. The pressure was on like it had never been before. He had to get this right. There was no room for mistakes. He had to ensure a future for Scully and Keiran. His son. He shook his head. What right had he to call the child that? He hadn't planned for him, cared for him. He hadn't even known of his existence before a few short weeks ago, and here he was becoming sentimental, imagining himself a father just because some sick bastards had somehow extracted his sperm from him and injected it into Scully's ova. If only he could find some way of exposing and jeopardising their project. He'd take great joy from laughing in their faces and ending up the victor. He'd sit back in a new home watching their trial on television, with his son on his lap and Scully across from him. They be looking at each other with barely restrained passion and..... He stopped himself by opening his eyes and sending the daydreams away. "Who the fuck are you kidding Mulder?" "Who indeed?" Fowley was alongside him and he cursed himself for not being aware of her arrival. He looked around. "Don't worry Fox, I'm on my own." "You're early." "I wanted to surprise you." "Well, you'll be pleased to know it worked. Shall we walk? I feel safer moving." Her hand in her pocket gripped around the weapon she stored there, ready to be used at any time. "So you never left Canada all this time?" "Well, we took a quick trip to the Bahamas, but decided we liked the climate better here. You see, we're used to being left out in the cold." She smirked. "I take it from that statement that you're not in the mood for chit chat?" He nodded. "I want to save lives." Diana cleared her throat, trying to concentrate on what she had to say, and not think about what she'd been sent to do. He walked alongside her with windswept hair, a stubled chin and a 'lost child' expression in his eyes, that he tried to cover up with a stern set of his jaw. He was the same man she had fallen in love with years ago. Perhaps a little more cynical, more aware of the sting of life, but more or less unchanged. He just had a few raw edges now. She swallowed hard. "I was sent here to kill you. They don't have any need for you. There's no deal to make." Despite his earlier protestations of wanting to walk, he stopped and turned to stare at her. "There must be something I can offer..." His words trailed off as he realised that he had been fooling himself. "Are you going to do it? Shoot me?" The lie came easily onto her lips. "No." "Then why did you come to meet me?" "Because if I didn't someone else would, and they'd carry out their mission without hesitation. I can't do it. I can't do that to you, and because of that I'll be on their hit list. I'll have to spend the rest of my life running. I hope you appreciate that." He obviously fell for her story because he looked at her with a measure of respect and pity. "I do." She nodded and brushed his upper arm with her hand. "I should go. I'll them I did the job. That might buy you some time." "Diana.....what's going to happen, and when?" "I don't know the details, but I know that most people won't live to see the year 2000, and for those that survive, life will never be the same again." She kissed his cheek. "It was fun once wasn't it?" His voice was raw. "Yes. I suppose so. At least, it was fun when I thought there might be a slim chance of victory." She shot him a sad smile and walked off, mingling into the crowds, leaving Mulder standing in the midst of people who were travelling blissfully unaware towards their holiday celebrations. Once out of his sight, she hit the speed dial on her phone. The man that she had hired picked up the call instantly. He told her the direction Mulder was moving in. "Okay. Keep on his tail until I pick it up. Then your work is done and you can disappear." North of St Donat Quebec December 22nd, 1999 5.15pm It had been difficult to follow him through the quiet back roads, and now on this unmade track she'd had to let him go ahead of her completely till she had lost sight of him. Diana's stomach ached with nerves, she wasn't sure she wouldn't lose him altogether. Relief and dread washed over her at the same time when she saw his jeep newly parked outside a small log cabin. He was pulling groceries from the trunk. She parked behind trees at the end of the long drive that almost hid the cabin from the road. Taking deep steady breaths, she checked her weapon again, and got out of her four-wheel drive. She'd walk the rest of the way, her arrival had to be too much of a surprise for the engine of a car. She trudged through the thick snow and reached the edge of the clearing on which the cabin was set. Mulder had finished unloading the goods that he'd stopped off at a store to buy and had gone inside. Diana crouched in the trees and considered what to do. Her mind was made up for her when Mulder appeared again, he must have forgotten something and was headed back for the jeep. She took aim, and her finger squeezed the trigger, but just as she fired the shot off, he turned as if sensing a presence and instead of taking the blow to the chest that she'd intended, he was hit in the arm. He went down clutching it, and Diana knew she had to move fast. Her shot would have been heard in the cabin and she had to get in there and confront its occupants before they came out and confronted her. She ran past Mulder, relieved to see that he had passed out. His gun lay half-out of its holster and she picked it up quickly, barely breaking her stride. She opened the cabin door and stepped inside, weapon raised and ready to fire at any time. The place was strangely quiet. She had expected screaming, or to be confronted by Scully, and instead, all was still. Perhaps Mulder had been here on his own. She moved stealthily around the place, checking corners and kicking open doors with her feet. Nothing, no-one. It was in the last bedroom she found him. A small baby, laying on a huge bed. He smiled up at her. Jesus could she really kill him, this poor, helpless innocent? As it happened, she didn't have the time to decide, for Scully showed no hesitation at all. With the natural instinct of a mother protecting her child, she kicked the door in front of her, causing Fowley to turn in reaction to the noise. She was caught by the flying bullet in the throat. Her last thought was not prophetic. She merely asked herself why she had not taken the same precautions in this room as she had done in the others? Why the hell hadn't she checked behind the door? Scully stood for a few moments in her firing stance. Slightly shocked by what she had done so easily. In fear for her own life and Keiran's she had taken someone else's. Without so much as even a moment's consideration. Fowley was collapsed on the floor. Scully approached the body warily, aware that the woman could still be alive. She kicked Diana's two weapons away and felt for her pulse. Dead. It was then that she noticed Keiran was crying. She dropped her gun to the floor and gathered him up, wrapping a blanket around him to ward off the cold. She had to go out and check Mulder. She had seen him, through the living room window, being gunned down, and had no idea of what sort of condition he was in. She prayed to God, as she dashed out into the snow, that he hadn't suffered the same fate as Diana Fowley. *********************** end of part 18 Part 19 may be delayed because Mulder though it was a sunflower seed and tried to eat it. Feedback makes me do my little happy dance - so please send it to: caroline.o@virgin.net ********************* REMEMBER ME? (19/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ******************************************* North of St Donat Quebec December 30th, 1999 7.52am The pain was like having a thousand hot needles plunged into his skin. As he awoke and became aware of it, he yelped, and shut his eyes again. She was at his side in a moment. Like she'd been time after time before. Whenever he was hurting, she was there. She laid a cool hand on his hot forehead. "Shh Mulder, you're okay." The words eased the pain a little and he opened his eyes to look up at her. She shot him a thin smile. "You look a lot better." He struggled to speak, his throat dry. "Di...Fowley." Scully's heart sank as his first concern was about the woman that had tried to kill him. She sat on the edge of the bed. "I shot her Mulder. I had no choice, she was trying to kill us all." He nodded in understanding and she realised that he hadn't been concerned for Diana Fowley, he had merely been enquiring as to what had happened to her. "I buried her out back, in the snow. They'll find her when it thaws." She patted his right shin and went into the kitchen for a glass of water, promising that she'd be right back. He lay looking at the ceiling, wondering at her strength and resilience. She'd saved them all by killing Fowley. Then she'd dragged the dead body out and dug a ditch big enough to bury it, and on top of that she'd somehow managed to get him inside and taken care of him. She appeared again and encouraged him to drink from the glass. He realised then that he was naked under the sheets and felt a twinge of embarrassment. She seemed to realise what he was thinking. "You were burning up, I had to keep you cool." The water soothed his throat and he rediscovered his voicebox. "How's Keiran?" "He's fine. I'll bring him in here in a minute so you can see him." He sat up slowly, wincing with the effort it cost him. She put some pillows behind his back for him to lay against. He was comforted by the sweet smell and warmth of her and offered her a tired smile. "Mind filling me in on what's happened. I'm a little foggy on the details?" She smirked. "Amnesia?" "Not as comprehensive as yours." She wore a plaid shirt and jeans. She was washed and clean and her hair shone brilliantly in the dull light of the room, but he could see the tiredness in her eyes and her paler-than-usual complexion. She sighed. "She must have followed you. You came in with some groceries and went back out to get something else. She was waiting for you and caught you with a bullet in the arm." For the first time he noticed that there was where his pain was concentrated. His body felt so weak all over that he hadn't realised that it was emanating from a specific area. He looked at his forearm, and saw the neatly applied bandage that was spotted faintly with blood. He nodded at her to continue. "She came into the cabin, I took the weapon you'd given me and hid behind one of the doors. She was too busy looking at Keiran and didn't notice me. I killed her instantly, I think. Then I went outside to you." He saw from her eyes that she wanted to pour all this out to him, that it was a relief to tell the story. "You were unconscious, losing a lot of blood. I got you inside and..I...uh...I took the bullet out." He wondered again at her endurance, shaking his head at the image of her pulling him inside and carrying out a makeshift operation, all with a dead body and a small baby in the cabin. "I didn't have anything to stitch the wound with, and no painkillers. I found some bandages and made do with those. You're going to have a scar. I considered taking you to a hospital, but I thought you wouldn't want that, although I'm sure if you could have received some blood, your recovery would have been much quicker. Anyway, you've been in and out ever since, very feverish." "In and out?" "You were awake, but not really with me. Talking, mumbling, that kind of thing, but you weren't responding at all." "How long has this been going on? How many days since I was shot?" She hesitated, leaning back from him slightly, beware of the manic look in his eyes. "It's December 30th." His eyes were wide. "My God. Then its tomorrow. We only have one day." She grew alarmed when he struggled to pull the covers down. "Mulder, you're still very sick." Ignoring her he swung his legs over the edge of the bed and used every ounce of energy in his body to get to his feet. Scully swallowed as he turned to her. "Where are my clothes?" Words stuck in her throat as her eyes swept down his form. She had undressed him, and bathed his naked body regularly over the last few days. She had admired him them, but having the man inside the body, conscious and standing before her, with all his mad intensity, was something else completely. "Scully?" Again, she was reduced to muteness. He wasn't perfect by any means. His feet were too large for his almost skinny legs. His broad chest and strong arms revealed that he exercised his upper body with more regularity than his lower half. His behind was a little to full to be drooled over. Her eyes flicked to his penis briefly, noting that what it lacked in fullness it made up for in length. His face was an equally odd collection of features, but added together they made a beautiful man. Finally, she managed to avert her gaze, flushed and wondering how long she'd been staring for. "They're in the kitchen. I washed them." He gave her a long look and if she had believed in witchcraft, she would have thought herself to be under some sort of spell. As she glanced at him again, saw the burning in his eyes, the stubble on his chin and the bandage on his arm, she realised that what felt like a spell was merely the strength of the love she felt for him. The acceptance of it forced itself into her mind, as he left her to go into the kitchen. It took her a few moments before she managed to motion herself into following him. He was struggling into his jeans, face screwed up with the pain it cost him. "Where are you going?" He shook his head. "I don't know." Suddenly, he seemed to stop fighting his hurting body and looked at her with a heavy sigh. "Can you give me a hand here?" She couldn't resist the soft tone in which he asked for help and began to assist him in getting his shirt, shocks and shoes on. Neither of them spoke again, until she had finished lacing his boots. "Fowley must have followed me up here. Where's her car?" "I guess its still in road, unless its been towed." "Have you been out to check it? There might be something interesting in there." "No Mulder, I haven't been to check it. I've been kind of busy." "I'm going to have a look." He grabbed his jacket and shot her a look that told her not to bother trying to talk him out of it as he walked slowly towards the front door. Out in the snow, he could feel her eyes on his back as he trudged towards the generic Ford. Breathing was hard and clouds formed from his mouth as he exhaled into the freezing air. By the time he reached the car, he could feel tears stinging his eyes. He was relieved to find the door open so that he could sit down for a while. He looked in the glove compartment and found a rental agreement, and an abandoned cell phone. Its battery was dead. He threw it into the back seat. He'd look in the trunk on his way back, but he was pretty sure the car was empty. The tears that had been threatening overwhelmed him and he hit the steering wheel in frustration. Christ he was a useless fuck-up. Diana had played him so easily and if it wasn't for Scully they'd all be dead by now, and while the date for the project's take-over moved ever closer, he'd been lying on his backside. He bit back a sob, telling himself to get it together. He had to do something, anything. Gradually, he managed to calm himself, as his brain thought out his choices and alternatives. When his body and psyche recovered, he got out of the car to go back to Scully, glad that he had his minor breakdown well out of her sight. When he reached the cabin, she was waiting for him in the living room, with Keiran perched on her hip. He almost gasped at the beauty of the scene. The fire behind her, the cherubic child clutching at her shirt. Her tiny figure ensconced in the baggy clothing and her blue eyes blazing at him; seeming to implore him into saving them. "Come on Scully, we're getting out of here." Morin Hts Quebec December 30, 1999 10.12am Scully had insisted on driving, and with the pain that paralysed him every time he tried to lift his arm, Mulder was not in any fit state to argue. "Where are we going?" "Washington, eventually. We'll head down via Toronto and cross over into Michigan." "That's not the quickest route, we'll be doubling back." "It's the least obvious though. If they're still watching, and Diana told them where she was meeting me, then they'll expect us to go via Montreal." "And when we get to Washington?" He shook his head and leaned back against the seat, hating the weakness that held him in its grip. "I don't know, yet. Stay off the main roads Scully. It's safer." "You really think that this thing that's going to happen is going to happen tomorrow night?" "Yes." She swallowed and licked her lips. "When you were unconscious, I wanted to speak to my Mother, to maybe warn her. But...I realised she probably wouldn't believe me anyway, and well, I thought they might have a tap on her line." "Its very likely." "I wrote her a letter instead. I want to post it in the next town we come to." He looked at her with compassion in his eyes. "Scully, she probably won't get the letter in time." "You could be wrong, you know? They may be trying to kill us, but the whole world Mulder, that's crazy. I don't believe it could be done. And aliens? I don't know why I'm buying into this. While you were sick, I spent a long time questioning my sanity for letting myself be led by your story." He was quiet for a while, before speaking in a soft voice. "I'll bet you had a great Christmas huh Scully?" She let out a long breath. "I'm sure I've had better." Thinking of the holiday when she had discovered Emily, he wanted to tell her not to count on it. "Thanks for looking after me Scully." "What was I supposed to do Mulder, let you die?" He left the question unanswered. Route 27 Michigan December 31, 1999 1.12am The night fell heavy and by the time they had inched their way over the border, blackness surrounded them. He saw Scully get restless and tired. She suggested a motel, but instead he shooed her into the back seat where she laid her head down next to Keiran's and snoozed alongside him. Mulder drove on, growing accustomed to nagging pain in his bicep, knowing that time was of the essence. At this rate they could reach D.C. sometime tomorrow, but he hadn't counted on the amount of times they'd had to stop for bathrooms, or food, or to have Keiran's bottles heated. His exhaustion was growing and he told himself that if he didn't stop for a short while he could involve them in a nasty accident. He didn't feel fully recovered from the fever brought on by his wound. He pulled the car over into an abandoned lot and shut his eyes, telling himself that he'd wake in a few hours to continue their journey. Route 27, Michigan 6.12am It was Keiran who woke them. The small boy protested loudly at the hunger pangs in his stomach. Scully rooted around amongst their belongings until she found a ready-made bottle. The last one. They'd have to visit a restaurant or convenience store soon to stock up. Keiran drank greedily, protesting first that it wasn't as warm as he liked it, but accepting it gratefully anyway. Mulder watched all this through dreamy eyes and turned the engine on to get some heat into the car. When the baby was finally quiet he gave Scully a small smile. "Hi." "Hi. You stopped after all." "I'm going to take a bathroom break and we'll hit the road again." As he was getting out the car, he noticed the dial on the clock and swore under his breath. He hadn't meant to sleep that long. He was even more frustrated when he had to fight to get the car door open. The snow had fallen heavy in the night and the roads were covered. Even with the jeep and snow chains it was going to be a slow drive. They'd be lucky if they hit D.C. by evening. Time was running out. December 31st, 1999 10.40pm He was lost. Scully kept shooting him wary glances from the passenger seat. "Mulder, maybe we ought to stop at the next town, ask directions to the freeway. We should have been there by now." He gritted his teeth. "I know.". He'd taken so many wrong roads and turnings that their path, if traced on a map, would look like spaghetti. He'd treated them to a wonderful detour into Grand Rapids, and had driven around it so many times trying to find a way out that Scully had declared that she never wanted to see that town again. He hadn't liked to point out that her wish would be granted in the most macabre of ways. "Keiran needs to stop as well. Its not fair to keep him cooped up like this." Mulder nodded, aware as Scully was that the baby had been grouchy all day, squirming against the confines of the car seat, not wanting to be pacified by anything; whining and sometimes screaming his dissent. However, an anger boiled over him, didn't Scully realise that whilst he was upsetting the child now, he was trying to get them somewhere, to anyone, who could save Keiran's life; all their lives. He was about to let his annoyance spill over into harsh words when they were blinded by a brilliant light. Scully cried out, he shoved a hand over his eyes, as they were bathed in its glow. There was a deafening roar, and whatever was causing it swept over their heads, throwing out an energy that snatched control of the car, Mulder fought with the steering wheel, but they skidded and slid off the road, banging into a snow drift with a thump. Mulder looked up to see whatever it was float away into the distance. For seconds he was entranced by the strange shape and speed of it, and then realised he had to check on Scully and Keiran. "You okay?" Scully looked winded, but unscathed, and they both turned to check on Keiran. To Mulder's surprise the baby wasn't crying. He didn't look the least bit scared. Instead his gaze was focused on the front windscreen, where the object had now disappeared from view and his tiny rosebud mouth was formed into a perfect 'O'. Then he fixed his gaze on the faces that were looking at him in amazement and broke out into a huge gummy grin, clapping his hands together. Mulder shook his head at Scully. "I think he wants to do that again." She let out a laugh of relief and climbed between the front seats and into the back, wanting to double-check that he really was fine. Mulder waited for her to get settled before he threw the jeep into reverse. The engine gunned into life happily, but the wheels merely spun. They were so deep into the drift that even the snow chains were having no effect. He hung his head for a few moments before getting out of the car to inspect the damage. He fell into snow that was up to his waist and once he had fought his way back out of it, he kicked the car in frustration, before climbing back inside. "I'm sorry Scully, unless a tow truck comes along, we're screwed." She bit her lip. "I don't think there are going to be too many passing by. It's New Years Eve." He nodded sadly, wishing to hell he had the luxury of a cell phone, but the battery on his had given up days ago and he had no way of recharging it. "I'll take a walk up the road, see if there's anything near." "Don't go too far." "I won't." Mulder trudged for half a mile before he whooped with joy at the sight of a pay phone. Then he stood with the receiver in his hand for five whole minutes, wondering who the hell he should call. He eventually dialled Skinner's home number, and relief washed over him when the man answered the phone. "Sir, you won't believe who this is." "You're right, I almost don't believe it. How the hell are you?" "Hell would be the operative word. I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere. I have Scully and ou....her baby, but our car's off the road. I need your help Sir, I have to get back to D.C." "Mulder. Sit tight. I'll find out where this call was placed from and we'll find you, but it might take some time, can you hang on?" He fought the dreaded weakness he felt consuming his body again and shivered in the cold. "We'll survive, but I have to get back there, you don't understand. Things are going to happen tonight, those men....." Skinner interrupted him. "I know." "Then you have to do something...anything you can. Try and fight it. Meet them. Please, anything." "Your work is done Mulder. Sit back and relax. We'll find you." The connection went dead and Mulder considered re-dialling for a while before slamming the phone down and leaning heavily against the booth. December 31st, 1999 11.52pm Keiran was asleep on her lap. She hugged him to her tightly, looking down into his face and noticing for the first time how much he looked like Mulder. There were some of her features in there too, but he had Mulder's mouth and forehead, even his hair. She looked at the man in the front seat who had climbed back into the car in silence and who, after telling her that help was on its way, had not spoken another word since. "Mulder, come in the back with us. It'll be warmer that way." He did as she asked and when she slid her body next to his tense limbs, he loosened up a little and threw an arm around her shoulders. "I'm sorry Scully. I should have taken you back to your family when I had the chance, so that you could have spent these last hours with them." She indicated the baby in her lap. "I have the most important person here. And Mulder, you saved our lives by hiding us." "But I can't save you from this. I couldn't...I don't know what will happen come morning." She used her free arm to pat his chest through the layers of clothing he wore. "You tried Mulder." The clock on the dashboard ticked over and read 00.00. They both looked at it warily before turning to one another, their gazes locking. She gave him a wry smile and tilted her face up to his, catching his lips with hers. They brushed softly for a moment before she pulled away. "Happy New Year." The temperature in the car seemed to rise, as she went back for more, licking her lips and searching for his kiss again. He rejoiced for a few moments in the touch and the thrill it sent through him, warming his cold, tired bones. The sweet taste and soft feel of her lips were ecstasy, yet when he felt her tongue try to edge it way into his mouth he pulled away. "No, Scully. Please. I've misled you. I didn't put you straight. I know what you think. That we were once lovers. Its not true. I let you believe it, but we've never even kissed before and I can't...........I couldn't. Not even a useless bastard like me could bear to take advantage of your lack of memory. It just....wasn't like that." Her hurt and bewildered expression stung him to the core and he suddenly couldn't bear to look at her. He threw open the car door and stalked out into the cold once more. ************************ end of part 19 Part 20 is kicking back with a nice iced tea. Be here soon - promise:) I don't want any feedback - NOT! send all you can to: caroline.o@virgin.net ***************** REMEMBER ME? (20/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ******************************************* January 1st, 2000 00.10 Scully put the sleeping Keiran back in his car seat and sat looking out the rear window. Mulder never ceased to surprise her. His emotions were always so close to the surface and so liable to zig and zag in every direction, that he was the king of unpredictable behaviour. She shot a glance at Keiran to make sure he was still snoozing soundly before she opened the door and jumped down into the snow. Christ, it was cold. Mulder was pacing around in circles, his face raised up to the sky. Looking for the answers once more from above. He didn't notice her until she stopped five feet away from the grooves he was making in the snow and raised her voice at him. "You'll freeze your ass off out here. Get back in the jeep." He looked at bit shocked at the tone of her voice and she realised that she sounded like her mother. Still it seemed to be somewhat effective. "I mean it Mulder, if you don't get back in there I'm just going to have to stand out here with you and we'll both freeze to death." He crossed over to her and put a hand on each of her arms. "Am I just the most spectacular, fucked-up, failure of a man or what?" She wiped the falling snow from her face and huddled into her coat. "No." He walked a few feet away from her, but spun around to look at her again. "Sure I am. I can admit it." Sighing heavily, she realised the she was hating him just a little bit for making her stand out here in sub zero temperatures. "Mulder, please stop feeling sorry for yourself, its getting old." "Leave me here then." "What and let you turn into a popsicle? No can do Mulder. We've been through too much, and saved each other too often for either of us to let the other come to any harm. Too many flukemen, too much Eugene Tooms, too many roaches and poltergeists." He stood staring at her, a questioning look came into eyes and the beginnings of a smile appeared. "Scully....did you get your memory back?" She rubbed her arms and stomped her feet. "Yes, I think so." She said as if it were something ordinary and obvious, instead of miraculous. He threw his arms up in the air. "Well, when? Why didn't you tell me?" "You've been behaving like a dense ass ever since, I haven't had the chance. It was when that... 'thing' ...flew over us." "The UFO?" "It wasn't necessarily a UFO." "Sure it was." "We were both tired and......" "It was." "Was not." "Was" "Was not." He laughed out loud and grinned at her. "Welcome back Scully." She gave him a full, toothy grin back. "Come on Mulder, I'm through playing games tonight. Let's get in the car and wait for what tomorrow brings." January 1st, 2000 6.20am Mulder had watched the sunrise with a glimmer of hope, enjoying its beauty and praying it wouldn't be the last he'd ever see. He and Scully had spent the night talking until she'd finally given into the tiredness and slipped into sleep, practically mid-sentence. She had given him Keiran to cuddle on his lap and he felt a strange sense of peace with the woman he loved beside him and his son on his knees. If there was a perfect way to die this was probably it. Yet, the morning had brought no signs of devastation or death. A few cars had passed them. The occupants looked like they were making their way home from parties that had lasted into the small hours of the morning, and nobody had looked sick, or dying; merely hungover. Perhaps it would take a while for the virus to spread. His talk with Scully had consisted of chewing over old cases, smiling at fond remembrances, recalling people they had met along the way. They hadn't made any protestations of feeling or bold statements about death, just in case making them would bring the end sooner. He had realised somewhere down the line that Scully's New Year kiss had been given to him after her memory had been restored. He revelled in the knowledge that she'd known exactly the state of their relationship prior to her disappearance, but had kissed him anyway. He had wrestled with the idea of resuming the kiss, but had held back, not wanting to rock the boat in any way; not wishing to spoil the wonderful atmosphere that they had enveloped themselves in. The helicopter startled him. It swooped down at speed, making a hell of noise, and landed on the road in front of them. Keiran whined and Scully gave him a blurry 'where am I?' look as she struggled to wake. Mulder ignored them both and stared at the man who jumped out of the chopper and started towards them. He opened the door and leaned in, grinning at both of them. "Sorry it took us so long, we've had a few other things to deal with." They both blinked at Skinner a few times as if he were some kind of vision. "Are you all okay?" Mulder nodded mutely. "What's going on?" "Let me get you all back to city and you'll get a full explanation. One that's been long overdue." Twenty minutes later they were high over the skies of Washington. Mulder looked down and saw nothing of the chaos he had expected to be littering the streets. He glanced over at Scully who offered him a shrug. Everything seemed so strange in its ordinariness. He was a little embarrassed at how close they'd been to Washington and yet completely unable to find it. The helicopter landed with a thud and as he helped Scully out, he looked at Skinner to ask where he was. Walter Skinner merely smiled at him. "One of those nameless Government buildings Mulder. Let's go downstairs. There are people waiting for us." Bemused, they descended two floors in an elevator. Skinner was beaming at both of them. "Its good to see you two alive, we were slow with Fowley, we didn't realise whose side she was on until it was too late. I apologise for sending her to Concannon with you Mulder, by doing that I led them straight to Scully. I didn't realise Diana was a spy. I was afraid that she might have gotten to you." "Scully got to her first." Skinner raised an eyebrow. "Well done. By the way Scully, I have a nurse on hand. We were concerned in case Keiran had come through this badly." Scully was clutching her son to her chest, gaping at the man in sheer astonishment. "He's fine. He needs a bottle and a diaper change." "Well maybe you'll let the nurse handle that while you get your briefing. He'll be in safe hands I promise." She weighed it up for a minute, before nodding in ascent and when the elevator stopped the uniformed nurse appeared and held out her hands for Keiran, making statements about how cute he was and how it would be a pleasure to take care of him for a while. Keiran didn't seem to mind being held by her, and Scully watched the nurse take him, speaking soothing words all the way. She made a mental note of the door he was carried through, just in case she decided later she couldn't trust Skinner after all. The whole scene was surreal. Grimy from their travels and exhausted from all the emotion and adversity they'd overcome during the last few weeks, they were shown into a boardroom, where smartly dressed men were sipping champagne and eating canapes. Mulder was taking everything in with a dazzled curiosity. Skinner led them to a comfortable sofa on the far end of the room, and the men they passed all nodded to them in greeting, seemingly delighted by their presence. Once they were seated, a tall, portly man with a kindly expression approached them. "Forgive us, we're celebrating you see." Mulder's short patience reached its endurance level. "Okay. That's it, someone tell me what the hell is going on." The man nodded his head in apology and took a chair next to the sofa. "Mr Mulder." He turned to Scully and his smile grew wider. "Miss Scully. The day came and we won. You won." Mulder ran a hand through his dirty hair. "Won. I didn't do anything." "Let me explain." "It's about time someone did." Skinner stepped forward and the older man made a gesture that he was welcome to speak. "Mulder, these men are here to thank you. For all you and Scully have done. We couldn't have destroyed them without you." "Are you in on this Skinner, are you part of this?" "Please believe me Mulder. It might not have seemed like it sometimes, but I'm one of the good guys. We've known about the project for many years, since its inception. It was a notion formed by crazy men. A lot of them were survivors from the third reich who wanted to try to and re-populate the world with their superior race. It was hard to fight them Mulder, they were so good at covering their tracks, and had many friends in high places, all over the world. They had power." Skinner cleared his throat and went on. "You were chosen because you were so ready to believe in the improbable and so eager to track down every piece of strange happening that crossed your desk. You were almost perfect, but not quite. You needed someone to restrain your recklessness, to remind you that science can be just as dangerous if it is abused. That's where Agent Scully came in of course. Between the two of you, over the course of the last seven years, you've managed to pervade their every lair, discover their secrets and reveal their wrongdoing. We followed where your genius led and destroyed them piece by piece." Mulder looked unconvinced. Skinner tried to persuade him by revealing more. "They saw you as hopeless innocents who did more to distract from their work and make yourself ridiculous, than ruin it. Yet ruin it you did. They expected the World to roll over and die for them. They never counted on the strength of the human spirit when it fights for its survival. They never counted on exceptional human beings like you two." Mulder stood, fury pouring from his eyes. "This is bullshit. You're telling me you knew all along. Do you know how many times we nearly died? You had the manpower to help us, but you let us think we were alone?" "We did help you Mulder, many times, we sent people to you, we gave advice and leads, and prevented your deaths many times over. We couldn't tell you though, it might have seeped through to them, and if they had realised that you weren't just two people, but the forerunner of an army, your death would have been assured." "What about...what about their conspirators..... the aliens." The older man chuckled. "Honestly Mr Mulder, aliens! You have such a rich imagination." Mulder stared at the man, seeing the acknowledgement in his gaze. He was silently told that what he had believed for years was true. There was something out there, but there was no way in hell this group of men were ever going to admit it. Mulder went to leave the room and Skinner placed an arm on his chest. The elder man got up from his chair and gave Mulder a soft look before nodding to Skinner to let him go. Everybody watched him leave. Scully spoke for the first time since she had entered the room. Her voice was calm, melodious. "It's over then?" Skinner nodded. "Yes. There was a...battle...raid...whatever you want to call it, last night. We almost cut it too fine, but succeeded in the end." She got slowly to her feet and went in search of her son. She stopped at the door however, and turned to look at them. "You used us. All of you. You cowered behind us. I hope I never see any of your faces again." **************** FOUR DAYS LATER Maggie Scully's house January 5th, 2000 11.14am Skinner stood nervously on the doorstep, wondering whether he would have the door slammed in his face. She opened it slowly, peeking out at him. "Scully, I was wondering if I might come in. I know what you said but...." She sighed and motioned for him to enter. "I've had a chance to think things over. I was hoping you'd come to see me actually." She shut the door behind him and led him into the kitchen. Keiran was in a high-chair, with some wooden bricks on the tray, he was scattering them around and enjoying the noise they made. "Hello young man." Keiran looked at Skinner briefly and went back to the game that he found more interesting. "He's wonderful." Scully nodded. "Can I get you some coffee?" "No thanks. I'm not going to stay long. I just came to see how you were doing? You've been through quite an ordeal." Taking a seat at the table, she indicated that he was welcome to do the same. "I'm fine. Well, no that's not quite true. I'm physically okay, but I still don't know how to feel about all of this. I still feel as if I've been some kind of pawn in a game." "I'm sorry. There were so many times when I wanted to tell you. Times when I thought that perhaps you suspected me." She let out an ironic chuckle. "There were times when I thought you were the enemy, and it turns out you were more on my side than I ever suspected. We were still set up though." Skinner nodded towards the rest of the house. "You're staying with your mother?" "For a while. I was exhausted at first, ready to collapse, she's taken care of Keiran and I." "Where's Mulder?" "I don't know. He'd disappeared by the time I left the building that day. I think I know where he might be. He needs some time on his own, I'm prepared to let him take it." "He hasn't been in touch with you?" She shook her head but he noticed that she didn't seem too concerned. He supposed that she knew Mulder better than he did. "I'll give him a few more days, and if he doesn't find me I'll go find him." Skinner nodded. "Well, the main reason I came, is to tell you that you still have a career in the Bureau. A promising one." "I don't want you to pull any favours for me." He regarded her with an amused expression. "I wasn't planning on pulling any, except to recommend you for your considerable professionalism and expertise whenever I'm asked my opinion of your capabilities. You have the talent to make your own way, I wouldn't dream of interfering. You may have to take a few tests and a physical to make sure you're fit for active duty, but I'm sure they'll be no problems. I'll give you a few weeks to make your decision. Let me know." She nodded, the choice already made in her mind. Skinner looked at his watch. "I have an appointment soon, I'll leave you alone, unless you have any questions?" "No, but I would like to thank you for Keiran." He looked startled and she smiled at him. "As I said, I was thinking about everything that has happened, and I came to the conclusion that I was taken this last time because you decided it was time to protect me for a while." He admitted it was the truth with a shrug. "After that time in Antartica, I was worried you wouldn't make it to the end." "Giving me amnesia and sticking me in the middle of nowhere was a little extreme." Skinner smiled, an expression that was as rare on his face as it used to be on her own. "Well, its not easy to hide you from Mulder." "How did you do it? Erase my memory?" "The chip Scully. When you found it in your neck, we began working on ways to manipulate it. We found one. Its useless by the way, you can take it out now. It won't harm you to remove it. We've destroyed their technology, their experiments. They were too dangerous, too unethical. The world can do without that kind of science." "And Keiran?" "That was easy enough. Existing expertise, artificial insemination. We recovered what they stole from you. Took a...um...sample from Mulder and bingo. By all reports, your respective reproductive systems were very compatible." Scully didn't want to think how they'd collected the 'sample from Mulder'. "Why did you give him to me though?" "I...we, felt that we had failed you. When you were taken that first time, it was never supposed to happen, it caught us unawares, and when we learned the consequences we wanted to try and make amends for what you had lost." "Mulder thought Keiran was created to be used as blackmail if he ever got to close." Skinner shook his head. "No. He's here because you deserve him. You and Mulder, and I hope he makes both of you very happy." Skinner headed for the door and she showed him out. As he walked down the path he called out over his shoulder. "Tell Mulder I'll be happy to answer any questions that he might have." "Oh I will. I'm sure he'll have plenty. Skinner." "Yes?" "Those men, are they all dead?" Skinner nodded. "As many of them as we could find. No doubt they'll be a few survivors, but they're getting old Scully, it'll soon be time for them to meet their makers and have their judgement day." ***************************** end of part 20 21 is in hypno-regression "Oh my God....its nearly the end" Feedback: caroline.o@virgin.net ****************************** REMEMBER ME? (21/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ******************************************* North of St Donat January 10th, 2000 2.22pm She'd waited for as long as she possibly could, before she'd packed an overnight bag, given over Keiran to her delighted mother's care and caught a plane north. Her rental car hummed a steady, slow path to the cabin. Scully wasn't really sure where he'd gone, she merely felt that he was here and had decided to trust her instincts. But the snow was thick and the roads icy, and it was relief when she finally pulled up outside his cabin without incident or accident. She pulled her bag from the car and walked to the door, realising at the last moment that if she were wrong, and he were somewhere else, she had no way of getting inside and faced a long, lonely drive back to the airport. When she found the door open she knew she'd been right. It wouldn't be unlocked if he weren't here. She stepped inside and found him standing between the kitchen and the living room, a can of beans in one hand and a fork in the other. He was staring at her as if she had two heads. She raised an eyebrow at him, dumped her bag and sank into the couch. "God Mulder, this place is very picturesque, but did you have to chose somewhere so difficult to get to? You know I don't do the great outdoors very well." He came to stand in front of her. "What are you doing here?" It was a pretty good question. She wasn't sure of her answer, so she merely avoided it. "Sitting on your couch. You shouldn't eat out of the can like that. Its not healthy." "Scully." It was the only word he could conjure up. "You're not pleased to see me?" "I didn't expect to. After I left....I didn't think you'd go to any trouble to seek me out." She shrugged out of her coat and walked past him to the fire, warming her hands in front of it. "I was disappointed that you didn't feel like you could turn to me to talk things over with, but I can overlook it this once. I know you Mulder, I know what you're going through. Everything's changed. You have the truth, the answers. There's nothing to search for now, and I know you're wondering what's left for you." He was surprised by her words. By the solidity and sureness. Their frankness. "It doesn't feel like the truth Scully. It was all lies. We were lies." She stood and saw the ache in his eyes. She hugged him briefly and then looked up at him. "How about some chocolate, or coffee Mulder? There's lots to talk about." He nodded mutely and moved to the kitchen. She watched him go. Repeating his question over in her mind. Why was she here? North of St Donat January 10th, 2000 3.00pm She'd told him all that Skinner had related to her. He listened carefully, registering his surprise at some of her revelations, and the related some information of his own. "I spoke to Skinner too. I asked him if he would mind removing Diana Fowley's earthly remains from out front. They came to take her yesterday." Scully gave him a soft look. "How do you feel about that Mulder, I mean, you must have loved her once?" He shrugged. "Another person who betrayed me. That's nothing new is it?" She sighed at him from the other end of the couch where she sat. "No, I suppose not." She tucked some loose strands of hair behind her ear and searched for the words to console him. "Mulder, I was angry too. Yet couldn't things have been so much worse? The project could have succeeded. I would have preferred to have been aware that Skinner and his band of merry men were behind us all the way, but I can't pretend that I'm not glad they were. We're alive Mulder and we have a future. No wonder they were celebrating, we should be celebrating too." He hugged a pillow to his chest and shook his head at her. "Its hard to believe its ended." "This isn't an end, its a beginning." "I almost wish it wasn't over." Her eyes sought out his, asking for some clarification. He let out a heavy sigh. "It was hell yes, but I loved working with you. I'll miss that." "So will I." Soft smiles were exchanged. "What are you going to do now Scully?" "I..." She was about to explain her reasons for wanting to stay with the Bureau, when she realised what Mulder was trying to ask. He didn't want to know what her professional plans were, he was asking her if she was about to disappear from his life. Like the rejection fearing, emotional coward that she was, she threw the question back at him. "What are you going to do Mulder?" "I have a lot of faults Scully, and I'm probably not the perfect candidate for fatherhood, but, I...I love him already, and I want to be a part of Keiran's life, but if you don't think its a good idea...." She quickly interrupted him. "I know what I said when you first told me about his parentage Mulder, but I'm glad you're his father, and I want you to be there for him. I was just scared of losing him then. Now, I'm glad that there's someone else to care for him." He nodded, and stayed silent. She felt her heart sink with disappointment. As much as she was glad he loved Keiran, she couldn't help but wish that the words he had spoken had been about her. He flustered for a moment, and her pulse accelerated. Perhaps now was the time when he'd say he wanted to be a part of her life too. Instead, he got to his feet and walked into one of the bedrooms. He came back moments later with a bundle of sixty or so sheets of paper and thrust them at her. She accepted them with a bemused glance. "I...I've been writing. I want you to read it and let me know whether its complete crap or not." She looked down at the pages in her hands. They were neatly typed and spaced, with the odd pencil correction in the margins. "What is this Mulder?" "A novel." She couldn't help the upward motion of her eyebrows. Of all the things she had expected when she'd decided to come here, she couldn't have predicted this. "You want to be a writer Mulder?" "That depends whether you think I'm good enough." "Me? What makes you think I'm a good judge?" "Just read it Scully please. I want to know if I should throw it in the garbage or not." "Okay." She bit her lip and lay back against the arm of the sofa, drawing her knees up and making herself comfortable for the first time since she had got there. Her stomach was tight with nerves. Good God, please don't it be awful, what on earth was she going to say to him if it was. She laid aside the title page and started reading. An hour later Mulder struggled in through the door with more wood for the fire. Unable to sit still waiting for her to finish, he had given himself a few chores to do. As he built the fire up and stored the rest of the wood in the box beside it, he looked over his shoulder to where she sat on the couch. Her head was bent over the pages, her face a beautiful mask, hiding whatever her thoughts were on his work. She hadn't said a word and the only time she had stopped reading was when she had crossed the room to search her bag for her reading glasses. She sat with those on now, balanced precariously on the end of her perfect nose. Her concentration on the book offered him the opportunity to look at her without being noticed, and after his fire building was complete he sat in a chair opposite her and studied her form. The tiny feet in white socks, the short but shapely legs in cosy chinos, and that plaid shirt, the red and black one that she'd been wearing the day he had recovered from the gunshot wound. He remembered coming back from Diana's car to see her standing in that shirt, with Keiran on her hip. He rubbed his upper arm in remembrance. The wound had healed reasonably well. He felt the stirrings of an erection and pulled his sweater down to cover it. To most men, she would look the picture of cosy domesticity, but to him, at that moment, she was the height of sexiness. He wanted to lay her down, bury himself inside her and never leave her. What would she do if he kissed her, if he told her that he'd been hiding up here for the last ten days because he was so afraid of what she might say if he told her his fantasies of them together? He'd begun writing in an effort to stop himself thinking about her twenty-four hours a day, but then realised that he'd been obsessing over her even in the words he wrote. Eventually he had decided to go to her. One more day and he'd go back to Washington, and ask, plead, beg her, to try for more than just a friendship or a partnership. He wanted the kind of connection that tied people together for life, because he knew he didn't live very well without her. And then, she had shown up here. Why? To see if he were okay or because she'd been angry about his leaving her and wanted to chew him out? He still didn't know. A piece of her hair fell loose from the ear she had tucked it behind, and as she put it back in place, Mulder almost groaned in frustration. His erection grew harder, more painful and he got up to go into the bedroom. Perhaps her being out of sight would help. She finished the last page with a lump in her throat. She stood slowly on shaky legs. Any doubts she'd ever had about Mulder's feelings for her had been expelled in the text she had just read. "Mulder." He appeared in the bedroom doorway, giving her a soft, nervous smile. He didn't seem to want to come any closer, afraid of her judgement perhaps. She took off her reading glasses and laid them on the coffee table. "It's good Mulder. Now come over here and take my clothes off." He blinked, twice, quickly in succession. Had she really just said that? Scully? To Him? "Last chance offer Mulder. Come here and make love to me in front of this fire, or I'm going home to Washington." His voice was raw, scratchy. "Scully." So often in bewildering or emotional situations he was reduced to that one word and all it meant to him. "Five more seconds to make up your mind Mulder. Tick tick." He crossed the room in less than half a second. Looking down at her in wonderment and putting his shaking hands on her hips. He sought out her eyes and their heated gazes met. She took a deep breath. "Mulder I....I'm not as good as you are at putting my thoughts, my feelings into words. I guess that's what comes from trying for so long to deny that you feel anything at all." She paused for a moment to lick her lips, and he suddenly wished for her to finish speaking so he could kiss her. His desire had fought a battle with his nervousness and won. "It doesn't mean though that I don't..I lo....I don't ever want to be apart from you again." He placed a hand on each side of her face and brought her lips into contact with his own. He was hesitant at first, soft, gentle. Until she sighed against his lips and it released a passion inside him he didn't even want to try and control. Her lips parted for his foraging tongue. He explored her mouth with a thoroughness that left her weak and inept for long moments, before she recovered enough to regain some ground and taste him as he was tasting her. They kissed until it became not enough, and shaky, desperate hands began explorations; running over fabric, wanting to feel the flesh underneath. She gasped into his neck as his hand cupped her left breast through her shirt. How many times had she wondered what that would feel like? He squeezed it almost roughly, shaping and stroking it in his palm. Her hips pushed of their own will into his body; seeking, needing. His erection against her stomach confirmed what she suspected; that this time, this first time wasn't to be a slow, luxurious gradual meshing of bodies and souls, but a greedy, wild, fulfilling release of pent-up passion. Mulder seemed to be touching her everywhere all at once, with his hands and his lips. She didn't think she'd be able to slow him down even if she wanted too, and the low ache in her centre told her that she didn't want to. Her hands pulled at his sweater, shoving it upwards until he got the message that she wanted it off. He pulled his mouth away to slip it over his head, but as it landed on the floor beside them, he suddenly seemed to get control of himself again. Scully took a deep shaky breath. Wanting his mouth again, wanting his touch again. Instead, he just looked at her. "Scully." He put a hand up to cup her cheek in a gesture that seemed so innocent after the way they had attacked each other in such a frenzy. "Scully, people can get caught up in passion. It can make idiots out of them. It can fool them into only thinking they want something....." "Mulder, are you bailing out on me?" He shook his head. "No, but I'm giving you chance to. Because as much I want this, here and now. I want forever too." She gave him a slow smile. "Mulder, I asked you to take my clothes off." He smiled back. "So you did." He held out his hand to lead her into the bedroom, but she shook her head. "No, Mulder, here. In front of the fire." Another sweet smile later and he kissed her again, another battle of tongues, before his lips travelled down to the base of her throat, to suck and nibble at the flesh there. God, how did he know that? How did he know she loved to be kissed there? She began pulling at his t-shirt, and again, bless him, he got the message and began to pull it off so she could feel the solid, hard flesh beneath. Looking down, she noticed that he had somehow managed to undo the buttons on her shirt. She felt suddenly light-headed, as if she were in a dream. A glorious, wonderful dream where she and Mulder were going to make love. Her and Mulder! He tossed his t-shirt aside and pushed her shirt off her shoulders. It floated to floor and the dreamy state she'd been in gave way to self-consciousness. He fingered the straps of her thermal undershirt. "Very sexy Scully." "I wasn't planning this." "No, no I mean it. Its sexy." She looked down at the practical underwear and shook her head at him. "Mulder, you're so weird." Bringing his head down to her level she kissed him thoroughly, till she couldn't think or breathe, and if his hands hadn't been holding her up she would have sunk to the floor. She was a little gratified when it turned out that he too was having trouble keeping upright. He turned them and sat down on the coffee table, pulling her towards him to undress her further till she stood barechested in front of him. He could feel her eyes on him, looking for his reaction. He was too entranced to offer reassurances that he liked what he saw, instead he decided to show her, putting his mouth around one nipple, while he stroked and teased the other. She made a noise that was somewhere between a gasp and a groan and the throbbing in his groin intensified. She leaned against him for support, her hands on his head, stroking his hair, as he lavished attention on the perfect, small round breasts in front of him. Moments later, he caught her hand trying to snake between their bodies. It touched the end of his penis through his jeans briefly before he caught it and pulled it away. She musn't touch him yet. If she touched him, reminded him in any way of his own need, he'd be ripping her clothes off and shoving himself inside her and pounding away, mindless of giving her any pleasure. He kissed the well-meaning hand and she leant backwards to look into his eyes, asking him what was wrong. "It's okay. Everything's alright." Yet it wasn't, not really. It wouldn't be alright till he had seen her naked and sated her thoroughly. He used light fingertips to brush against her centre, through her chinos, and she almost jumped out of her skin. He smiled up at her as she stroked his shoulders, and touched her again, applying mild pressure. He was shocked by the wetness that soaked his fingers, even through thick cotton. She pushed her hips towards him, wanting more of his touch. Instead he undid her button and fly and yanked her pants and panties down till they were balled at her feet. He looked in amazement at the thin white scar that crossed her belly and he traced a finger along it, till he realised what it was. His son. Their son. Keiran had left his mark on his mother. Scully watched as Mulder's face crumpled and his forehead fell against her stomach. She stood for two, maybe three minutes, Holding his head, stroking his hair. She bit her lip to stop herself from moaning her frustration at the cessation of pleasure. If she didn't ache from wanting him so much, it might have even been funny. Standing there with her pants around her ankles while Mulder communed with her caesarean scar. "Mulder, are you crying?" He shook his head, but she could feel his tears on her stomach. With a sigh she decided he needed comfort more than anything else and was just about to call the whole thing off and redress herself when she felt his hand snaking between her legs. His long, clever fingers, scraped along her thighs, teasing the flesh, making her gasp in surprise and then moan when he dipped into her wet centre. Gently, and then with more pressure, he stroked, listening to the noises and rhythms of her body until he knew what she liked. Two fingers inside her and a thumb making slow deliberate circles around and over her clitoris and she was humming. Humming. A low keening sound. Mulder smiled and kissed the scar their son had caused as he worked his hand against her, delighting in having his questions at long last answered. Scully, a moaner or a screamer? No, a hummer. Yet, after a while it gave way to panting, and she began to rock back and forth against him. He was overcome with the urge to do more, to make her feel more. He pushed her back gently and slid from the coffee table onto his knees. Scully was his faith, his God. He wanted to kneel and worship like a true believer. She gasped his name as held her ass firmly and brought her hot wet flesh against his mouth. To his surprise she tried to push his head backwards, as if she didn't want him there. "Mul...don't. Doesn't...Mul." Her legs were trembling. In fact her whole body was shaking, so it was no surprise to her that she had gone beyond speech. When he had knelt down, and she had realised what he had intended to do, she had tried to stop him, wanting to explain that his hand would have been better. Men had gone down on her before, and she'd felt nothing but downright embarrassment. It had never worked, whether it was a trust issue, Catholic guilt, or the fear of laying herself completely bare and vulnerable, she just didn't know. She suddenly remembered her dream the night they had shared a bed in the hotel room while on the run, and how she had fantasised of this in her sleep. She had enjoyed it in the dream, but doubted that in reality he would be able to succeed where other men had failed. She'd tried to push Mulder away, to explain it wasn't something she enjoyed, but then he did something with his tongue that engulfed her body with a strong wave of pleasure. Then came a brushing of teeth against her clitoris, and then a push of tongue inside her and she realised that she was coming. Glad of the hands that supported her, she thrust strongly against his face, unable able to help the animalistic pants and the long, low noises she was making. The orgasm was long and deep and colourful and Mulder sucked, nibbled and bit at her to lengthen it and she groaned his name to thank him as white hot bolts of pleasure engulfed her. When she became somewhat aware of the world around her again, she was flat on her back on the floor. Mulder was doing something around her ankles that confused her until she realised he was pulling her remaining clothes off. He was then standing over her and she wanted to cry out to him not to leave her, but couldn't form any words. Luckily, he wasn't going anywhere, he was just removing his jeans. Her eyes fixed on his erection, and subconsciously her legs widened. He knelt between them and leaned over her. The sensitive soul who had cried against her stomach was gone and the face before her now was wild, dark and almost manic. His eyes were black, and she realised it was with hunger, for her. He looked a dangerous man at the moment and she felt a tremor go through as she arched her hips towards him. She wanted him inside her, and wondered at her needing him even after he'd made her come. He'd awakened some shamelessly lusty, passionate, sexual side of her that she'd locked away and had forgotten existed. With his dark eyes still intent on her face he took his erection in his hand and brushed it against her centre. "Scully, I already knew how incredibly beautiful you are, but you're even more impossibly gorgeous when you come." He teased her with his erection again, pushing against her entrance, before pulling back. Her hips pushed into the air in search of him and her throat made that strange low humming noise again, when she came away empty. Mulder felt incredibly powerful. For a long time he had felt as if Scully unfairly had the power to make him live or die, laugh or cry, with the simplest or words or gestures. Now he knew; he saw for the first time, that it wasn't just she who had that power over him. He'd just reduced this wonderfully strong woman into a pile of helpless, pleasure soaked limbs. "I'm going to make you come every night for the rest of your life Scully." She smiled at him through the thick sexual haze she was in and he loved her. "Twice on Sundays." "Sure Scully, twice on Sundays." Not able to resist her any longer, and seriously worried about the pain in his groin, he lay over her and kissed her delectable, sweet tasting mouth. He drew her knees up and she wrapped her legs around his thighs as he worked his way inside her. She was small and tight, and so goddamned warm that he thought he might come there and then. His breathing accelerated and he fought to calm it. She was kissing his face, his eyes, his nose, telling him how good he felt. He shut his eyes and fought off his orgasm. "Oh God Scully, I love you." His hips didn't want to stay still and began pumping quickly, far faster than he wanted them to. The feel of inner walls clamping around him, squeezing him, made him delirious. Her breasts against his chest, her heels on the back of his thighs, her tears on his neck, it all felt so right. Her tears? He looked down at her to see her eyes huge and wet, but there was happiness in her gaze and she looked at him lovingly, thrusting her hips in time with his. "You.....you...crying Scully?" She shook her head, enjoying the lie. "No." He lost himself then, moving faster, seeking more, wanting to reach nirvana, so he could rest by her side happy and contended. She pulled her legs up and began to make that hum again. He panted above her, and their eyes locked and held, each daring the other to be the first to look away; the first to blink. Mulder thought maybe he orgasmed first, because even when he had exploded within her and yelled and collapsed over her, he could still feel her moving against him, milking him. Then, with a heavy sigh, she was still, and small elegant hands stroked his back. "Mulder...." He grunted. "I can't.... breathe." He scooted away from her instantly, aware that he must have felt like a concrete slab laying on her chest. He pulled her towards him, curling an arm around her shoulders and she rested her head on his breastbone, praying that he wouldn't say anything trite along the lines of 'was it good for you?" There were a few golden moments of wondrous silence before he spoke. "Scully, was it really good?" She cringed. "Mulder. Its something you do rather than talk about. Don't spoil it." He was confused for a moment, before he realised that their wires were crossed. "I was talking about my book." *********************************** end of part 21 Part 22 having chip removed from its neck. Feedback: caroline.o@virgin.net ************************************ REMEMBER ME? (22/22) BY CAROLINE O Rating: NC-17 Category: MSR/ADVENTURE/MYSTERY Summary: Mulder and Scully have been forcibly separated from each other for fourteen months. Scully has a new life, but no knowledge of her previous one. Disclaimer: See part 1 ********************************************** North of St Donat January 10th, 2000 7.22pm When he woke, his body hurt, everywhere. Yet, he smiled when he heard her voice drifting in from the kitchen. She was talking on the phone and it didn't take him long to figure out who she was speaking to. "Good. Don't pick him up every single time he cries. He loves attention, he'll have you running around after him all day and night.....yeah, just like his dad." Mulder frowned and called out loudly so he'd be sure Maggie heard. "Scully, come back to bed." He heard the embarrassment in her voice. "I...erm...I have to go. Yeah. Day after tomorrow. Okay. I'll call again. Thanks Mom." She was standing over him two minutes later, wearing just that plaid shirt that drove him crazy, glaring at him with just a hint of amusement in her eyes. "Ah come on Scully, she's probably dancing around the kitchen in delight. Now, get back in this bed." It was where they'd been lazing for hours now, drifting in and out sleep, stroking, touching, kissing, recovering from both the physical exertion and the shock of having made love at last. He snuck out an arm and caught her off balance tugging her down so she was sprawled on top of him. He put an arm around her and held her there. They kissed slowly and deeply for a long time and eventually broke apart on a sigh. "Tell me more about how much you liked my book." She groaned and snuggled under the covers beside him, curling up against his side. "Mulder your writing has the suspense of Jose Chung, the horror of Stephen King, the off-beat humour of Douglas Adams and the romance of.... um....a really good romance writer. It'll be a bestseller." "You really think so?" Shutting her eyes, she remembered the way his writing had effected her, particularly the male character, a thinly disguised version of himself. A man who was so in love with his work colleague, but so scared of her rejection, and so worried that he'd bring her nothing but pain, that he couldn't bring himself to admit his feelings to her. "Oh, yes. Definitely. I think I'm going to enjoy being a writers wife." Silence purveyed the room for long moments, while he digested what she had just said. "Wife?" She rose up to lean on her elbow and looked down at him. "Mulder I had your baby. I expect you to make an honest woman of me." He saw from her mischievous that she was joking, but decided he might just hold her to it some time in the future, if he ever felt brave enough to be Dana Scully's husband. "What are you going to do Scully?" "I'm staying with the Bureau Mulder." She looked away from him, unable to meet his gaze. "I know that it has its corruptive forces but...." He stopped her with a short, sweet kiss. "You don't have to explain yourself to me, I know that you love your job." "I'll have to take assessment tests and medicals to prove I'm up to it after all this time. I'm going to have to study, life might be crazy for a while." "When isn't it? Your mother and I can handle Keiran between us. I'd love to take care of him while you work." "I was hoping you'd say that." She snuggled further into his body, loving the warmth he gave off. "Listen to us Mulder, planning a future, I thought this day would never come." His face grew serious and she glanced up at him in concern. "What's wrong?" "I love you Scully." She felt a lump form in her throat and moved to kiss him but he placed a restraining hand on her shoulder. "No. I know you feel it, but tell me." Biting her lip, she looked at him pleadingly. "I'm sorry, I'm terrible at these things. I've ruined every relationship I've ever been in by being withdrawn, hiding myself. Not letting people in." He pushed her hair back from her face and forced her eyes to meet his. "You can't ruin this one. Its impossible, you could try everything to get rid of me and I wouldn't go." He saw her swallow, trying to work up some courage, and eventually decided to let her off the hook. "You know, one night, I was lying beside you and I told you I loved you. You were kind of half-asleep and you answered me." "What....what did I say?" "Cheeseburger." They both smiled. "Guess I was hungry." She ran a hand over his chest, wondering if she'd ever get over the wonder of being able to touch him so freely, whenever she wished. "I love you Mulder." "And I...mmm...Cheeseburger you too." She rolled her eyes. "You know I...I never said that to anybody except my family before. I've thought it, known I was in love, but I never said the words out loud." "Well, thank you." "Mulder, was I different? Before, when I didn't have my memory. Was I someone else, did you know me at all?" "Yes and no. You were you, but without the reservations that life has given you. We spoke more freely to each other didn't we? We were more honest." She nodded. "That's how I want it to be." "We'll have that, it just requires some work." "Will you be okay Mulder, without the X Files?" "I'll be more than okay Scully, I'll be better. They were my life once, but they almost destroyed me. They would have, if it hadn't been for you. You saved me." "You keep saying that, but...I don't know...." He quieted her by moving a hand to her breast and stroking it softly. "Your love saved me." She kissed his chest. "And you saved the World. Even if the World will never know it." She began sliding down his body. He had seemed to do all the work during their earlier lovemaking, now it was her turn to reciprocate, and she thought she might enjoy it. "Mulder, your writing turned me on." "I'll write more Scully. Lots more." She smiled when his erection came level with her eyes. "The couple in your book Mulder, do they get together in the end?" She closed her mouth around him. He gasped. "Oh yeah, Scully. They live happily ever after." *************************************** DA END 22 chapters fought the future and won. Feedback appreciated (well the nice stuff) at: caroline.o@virgin.net